I Can't Save You From Yourself

I sat crossed legged on my bed while my textbook sat in my lap. I was almost finished with my math homework and to me, that was a relief. I looked outside my bedroom window, I live with my parents in a beautiful house in the middle of Rodeo. My house looks a lot like my grandmothers, which explains why I'm often so at peace here. My bedroom is no great queens throne, but it's perfect to me, not a huge room or a tiny room cramped with knicknacks.

I suppose I should tell you a little more about myself. My name is Christian Webber, I don't know why, but I just dislike my name... Lucky me, my parents nicknamed me Christie ,Christian is too boyish, but that hasn't stopped anyone from calling me that, either. Surely my mom had known that, right? Hell... She was all jacked up on meds at the hospital I'm not sure she could even tell her foot from her hand. I grimaced at the thought and looked down at the math sheet in my lap again.

The numbers were slowly becoming a blur and I really wanted to shove it all aside, curl up in a ball under the blankets and sleep until the end of the semester. But alas, my mom would make sure that I was up bright and early on Friday morning. I sighed in annoyance at the thought but was slightly joyed at the thought of being one day closer to the weekend. Two full days of no school, I can't imagine anything better. 

I decided I'd finish it early tomorrow morning and got up and changed into some pajamas. I went downstairs to brush my teeth, but as I pasted through the living room, my mom called me out. I hesitated one step ahead of the doorway into the living room and looked in to see my mom, on the couch next to dad, who was reading the paper that has come this morning.

“Chis?”

“Yeah mom?” I leaned against the doorway.

“You get home from school around four or so, right?” she asked.

I nodded “Yeah, about that.”

She pursed her lips thoughtfully “Well honey, when you get home tomorrow afternoon, you need to get packed. Your aunt Casey has just been in a car accident and is in the Los Angeles hospital.” she explained.

Aunt Casey was my mothers sister and my favorite living relative next to uncle Roger. I nodded slowly as I processed what had happened to her “Is she okay?” I asked with genuine worry.

My mom nodded slowly “Yes, just a few broken ribs and stuff. Nothing extremely serious, but still, I think we as a family should visit her.” my mom explained.

I nodded. There goes my quiet weekend...

“Yeah, absolutely, we should visit her.” I was trying to stretch my sentences because my parents had a habit of calling out on me for having a lack of words. It's what comes with being shy and refusing to be social I just try to stay unnoticed, but my behavior does not go unnoticed. Not by my parents, at least...

I nodded once after my mom said thank you for understanding... Like she said it like I had some social status to live up to after school like hanging with the cheerleading squad and watching the various sport practices. I scoffed quietly at that while I continued to make my way towards the bathroom to brush my teeth.

That night, I laid awake in bed, trying to convince myself that sleep was the best option and that I needed to give into it. If I didn't know it then, I sure know it now. That was not going to happen. Now that my mind was void of any important thoughts, it ran wild with everything that had happened today. The news of my aunt and the sudden trip I'd be taking to Los Angeles tomorrow evening, the way Sandy Ferwell sneered at me at school today for tripping... And falling into Mike's arms of course, yet I almost felt bad, not even knowing his last name.

I rolled over so I could see my pale purple walls bleached in moonlight coming through the open window. The cool breeze drifted eerily into my room, making my curtains flutter slightly like ghosts were moving through them. I watched them as my mind began to wander again, back to the mysterious pot head that had sat next to me that day in history. The looks he kept giving me made me want to crawl under a rock and be forgotten. If I was outgoing of a girl as Sandy Ferwell, I would have called him out on it and asked why he was staring at me without any shame.

However, let's all take a moment to remember that I'm not Sandy Ferwell, and I most certainly am not outgoing... Far from it actually. I would avoid the pot heads as much as humanly possible tomorrow. I only seemed to humiliate myself whenever I was near any of them, so I only found it suiting that I avoid them all all together.

I was certain that that'd be my best course of action... But I wondered if I'd actually be able to hold myself to it. I was a terrible promise keeper to myself, but could keep them better then a diary for anyone else. I looked firmly at the wall while I imagined the following day and the terrors it'd bring...
Let's just say that all the scenarios I came up with, were actually far better then how it actually turned out.