I Can't Save You From Yourself

I sat in the cafeteria on Tuesday afternoon feeling rather self conscious reading Billie's favorite book. Which wasn't a surprise, I guess, because I was always self-conscious.

I almost wanted to stop reading the book because it had relation to him and he had relation to the pot heads that had embarrassed me and I just wanted to avoid them all together. However, the book was too good to put down and just give up on and forget about. And it's not like I had something better to do before history class. I'd already finished all my homework, though I'd look around the room and see a few people in my history class rushing to write down their essays. I smiled to myself. And looked back down upon chapter four.

When the bell rang, I was sent doing what I do every weekday at this time. Stand up, shove my book back into my bag and pick up my tray to dump it into the trash. I was on my way to do that, and had turned around after returning the tray, hearing my name being called through a mass of cat calls. I spotted them, not the pot heads, but the Barbies. They were over at their designated table waving their arms in the air shouting “Chrissy!”

Sandy smiled evilly at me, “Look out Footloose.” she sneered and in that second, I was blinded.

Water dripped down my face in ribbons. I cried out in surprise and spun around to face Conner Bradly. Sandy's boyfriend who was a jock and easily the most popular guy in school, it'd be a dream to get a bucket of water dumped on you by him to any other girl, but not me... To me, I was furious and wanted to pound his ass into the ground.

As you know, I'm shy and quiet and only talk when spoken too. I stutter and mumble a lot. But now, ha ha... Now rage boiled my blood like I've never known and before I knew what I was even doing, I was on him. Shoving him into the wall behind him and trying to get in a good punch in at his face.

Which both surprised myself and horrified me. I'm not a violent person. I'm the person to takes what's thrown at her quietly and accepts it. But not now, shit... I was attacking him and didn't feel in control of my actions. Until someone pulled me off him. He had been trying to shove me off like a wimp and crying out for help. I somehow felt strangely satisfied.

“What the hell is wrong with you?!” we both shouted at each other at the same time. He knew exactly what was wrong with me. The lying little shit.

I glared cuttingly at him when a hand landed on my shoulder and I spun around in self defense. Billie stood there. Some weird expression on his face. Like half shock, half amazed. Well he shouldn't get to happy about my beating up Conner, I wasn't in control of myself. I merely went along with it and now, I'm probably in some serious trouble...

I was right, principle Mark showed up on the scene a few moments later with a proud looking Sandy following him. She smirked at me, knowing that she'd gotten away with it all. And I'd get the worst end of the stick...

“Miss Webber! Mr. Bradley! What is going on here?” he roared. Taking in my dripping clothes and Conner's bloody nose. I cringed away from his tone.

“She started it!” Conner cried out like a little kid, and in that moment I felt like slugging him again. He knew exactly whose fault it was and he wouldn't be stepping up to the plate to turn himself in. Oh no, and all the witnesses, are too scared of the jocks and Barbies to say shit to save my skin.

I looked around the room. It had fallen silent of all conversation and all I could hear was my own racing heart beat and principle Mark's gruff angry breaths. I knew I was in trouble.

“Miss Webber, what makes you think you must beat up another student to understand each other?” he was trying to stay calm, but quite frankly, it looked like he wanted to let me have it. Conner is the captain on the basket ball team and there was no way he'd let me get away with harming his 'star child'

I sighed and ran a hand through my soaked hair merely for something to do. I was wordless, what was I supposed to say? "I didn't do anything."?

“I didn't do anything sir, Conner dumped water on me.” I declared, clichely.

“Did not, I was 'carrying' a glass of water back to my table and she ran into it.” said Conner.

"What?" I demanded angrily, "That wasn't a cup! It was a fucking pitcher!" I shouted at him.

"Miss Webber, language." Principle Mark scolded, a dark look in his eyes as he tried to decide who to believe.

I can't believe Conner. I can't believe the principle! He's siding with him on this unbelievable story. If it was only a glass of water, like he says, how come I'm soaked from head to toe?

“Miss Webber, to my office.” he said sternly.

“What? No! It's not my fault, Conner he—”

Principle Mark firmly grabbed my shoulder “Now.”

I glared at him and stiffly began to follow him.

“Wait!” I looked behind me half expecting to see Conner. But instead I saw Billie, Jason, Mike and the kid with brown hair.

“What?” Principle Mark snapped. Turning to face them.

“It's not Christian's fault. She was on her way to history class when Conner dumped a bucket of water on her and she took off on him.” Billie stated firmly. I guess I should be grateful he said anything, but he still kinda threw me under the bus...

Mark looked at him, and slowly, Billie became a icon of rebellion in the cafeteria. More students stood up from their seats claiming the same thing they'd witnessed. 

First of all, everyone in East Bay high hardy even knew me, unless they were marking me up as a cool person because I stood up to Conner. However that was merely revenge. I never wanted to hurt anyone else.

“Mr. Bradley... Is this true?” principle Mark demanded.

Conner floundered at first then merely nodded and looked Mark and I in the eyes. Mark didn't look too much in the mood for any lies. So he grabbed a hold of hid letterman jacket and led him out of the lunch room. A roar of cheers rose up from behind me. I turned to face Billie breathlessly in shock.

“Th, thank you.. Billie.” I stuttered.

He smiled and nodded “At your service Chris.” He bowed before me, before Mike tugged the sleeve of his black and white baseball shirt. They walked off, out the front doors, to shoot up before class, probably.

The bell rang out again and I was sent tripping over my boots to history class. The rubber soles squeaking on the tile in the hallway.

Billie was hot on my heels and we dropped into our seats in the nick of time. Mr. Varner turned to see his fully stocked class room and gave a smile of pride that no one had ditched. I spared Billie a sheepish smile before getting out my books. Mike was quiet for all of the class. They clearly didn't want to have to deal with Mr. Varner sending them to a angry principle Mark's office today. Especially not after Conner...

We simply had to turn in history essays and learn more about early American history that day. But I spaced out for most of it and I honestly don't think I could repeat any of it back to Mr. Varner if he asked. 

I waved goodbye to more people than just Mr. Varner as I exited his class room at the end of the hour. Billie smiled nervously and Mike waved me goodbye. With that done, I made my way to the parking lot. I already knew that my popularity of that hour was only sparked by the fight, and tomorrow I'd be an object of gossip and someone to pick on when they realized I was a threat.

I hopped into my Plymouth and started the engine while pulling my seatbelt over my head and snapped it into place. I backed out of my usual spot and began the drive home.

It was nice and sunny out, I couldn't deny that. Actually the warmest day I've seen in Oakland in two weeks. I rolled down my windows on the drive back and blared the AC/DC loudly out of the speakers. I sang along to the lyrics as I made my way across Rodeo. Finally parked in my parents drive, I killed the engine and grabbed my backpack. Pulled it over my left shoulder and climbed out of my car after rolling the windows up. I went inside, the front door unlocked so I was assuming that my parents were home, if not both then one. They always lock the front door.

“Mom, Dad, I'm home!” I called out as I dropped my backpack onto the chair next to the door. My clothes were still damp and matted to my skin. Sort of uncomfortable. And since I don't participate in sports, I never keep a spare change of clothes handy in my locker or backpack.

I was first greeted by the approaching sound of clacking heels. Then my mom appeared in the foyer, putting a crystal earring into her left ear as she stood there. Looking unusual, looking formal...
She wore a casual knee length royal blue dress. Matching blue heels and her light blond hair up in a bun high upon her head. 

“Where you going?” I chuckled while digging through my backpack for my copy of the Catcher in the Rye.

She laughed and straightened the skirt of her dress. 
“Our neighbors, the Robinson's...”

“The ones Dad works with?” I interrupted

Mom nodded “Yes, they invited me and your father out to a cocktail party tonight. It's like an employee thank you.” she explained.

The Robinson's that live next door, Dave Robinson is the manager at the auto shop my dad works at. So it's a thank you thing eh? And because I'm below 21, guess who's not invited.

“We should be back around twelve or so, there's food in the fridge, and some money on the counter if you want to order pizza. Okay, Chris?” she said when I didn't answer her. She patted my shoulder and quickly became aware of the dampness of my shirt.

“What happened to you?” my mom asked, circling me in wonder of why I was damp, looking at me like I as the ugliest statue she'd ever seen.

I shrugged it off “Prank at school.”

She rose her eyebrows.

“It's no big deal though I mean, it's all sorted out.” I explained.
 
She studied me for a moment longer to be sure, then nodded once and called for my dad to hurry up. I smiled to myself

After I waved goodbye and they pulled away in the backseat of the Robinson's car, I went back inside and turned on the TV. Turned on the CD player in the foyer and blasted Kiss throughout the house with sheer joy written on my face. I danced lightly throughout the house while I prepared dinner. I knew how early it was, but I was starved. 

While my food microwaved, I went upstairs to my room and changed into a pair of neon green leggings with a jean skirt and a white tank top.

I bounced back down the stairs and stole a hair tie from the junk drawer in the kitchen and tied back my damp hair in a loose bun. I sat on the couch and ate, watching a episode of Scooby-Doo. The ancient TV show entertained me for a half hour until I was done eating and bored again. These were the kind of nights that I wished I had friends to go visit and hang out with.

My mind instantly darted to Billie. He seemed to be my best friend right now right? Though we rarely talk I feel like we share some kind of relation. I was almost out of books and it was too depressing digging through my grandmothers. There is a bookstore a few blocks from my house, and I do have a bit of money saved, maybe I'll go buy some books, because well, books entertain me far longer than a TV.

With that, I found my hiking boots by the front door... What a odd clothing selection I had on right now... And had my purse and walked outside into the thinning light.