Over Again

I sipped my coffee and sat down in front of the TV, turning on the channel that Harry had told me to watch.

The boys were doing a live interview on a TV show today, and the girls were at Liam’s parent’s house to spend the night with them, so I was actually able to watch the boys do an interview.

The commercial ended and the boy’s faces filled the screen, along with an interviewer.

“Good afternoon, everyone, we’re here with One Direction!”

The boys all waved at the camera and greeted the interviewer.

It started off well, with questions about the new album that they were working on and the new tour, what they did in their free time, etc.

But then, the interviewer asked the one question I didn’t want him to.

“So, boys, I need to ask, for the fans, which of you are taken?”

I cringed as I watched Liam and Niall look at each other as the three other boys hands shot up immediately.

I wanted to turn the TV off, but I kept watching.

“Now, those of you in relationships, is it hard to keep them going when you’re on the road all the time?”

I bit my lip and watched as each boy became sadder and sadder.

“I think that is probably the hardest thing about going on tour.” Harry said slowly. “But if you love someone, it’s worth it.”

They purposely panned over to Liam’s face.

I closed my eyes and turned the TV off, not wanting to hear any more.

They always wanted to make them sad or emotional, to show their vulnerable side or whatever to the fans, but this was too much.

I needed to go for a run to clear my head, so I did just that. I went up to the bedroom to change, and started running down the block, as far as my legs would take me.

I was stupid and didn’t check the weather, though.

I didn’t get very far before the sky opened up and rain started pouring down on me.

I quickly turned around and started back toward the house, hoping to god that this didn’t turn into a storm.

Just as I got to the front door, however, a flash of lightning illuminated the sky.

I shakily unlocked the door and went inside, closing my eyes as the thunder rolled.

I got up to the bedroom and found my phone just in time for another lightning flash.

Hot, fresh tears filled my eyes as I wiped at them. This was ridiculous, to be scared of storms at my age, I knew that, but they had always been my biggest fear.

I was about to dial Harry’s number when my phone started vibrating, his face flashing across the screen.

I accepted the call, but I couldn’t talk, which was okay, since he started talking as soon as I picked up.

“Listen, Bailey, there’s a huge crowd and Niall’s freaking out and-“

His words became muffled as more thunder rolled and I let out a whimpering sound. God, I was so pathetic.

“Bailey? Bailey, what’s happening?”

Harry’s frantic voice pulled me out of my thoughts.

I couldn’t answer him, though, and he audibly sighed.

“I’m going to call you right back, Bailey.”

I didn’t want him to leave, I didn’t want his voice to stop, but he hung up.

True to his word, a second later, there was an incoming facetime call, which I hit accept on right away, Harry and Niall’s faces filling the screen. They must have found a hallway to duck down. Harry looked at me and shook his head, running a hand through his hair.

“Okay, I need you to both breathe.” Harry instructed, demonstrating deep breaths. I focused on Harry, watching him breath, ignoring the sounds from outside.

“Everything is going to be okay.” Harry continued, and I watched as he put his arm on Niall’s shoulder.

I kept watching the screen as Harry kept telling us that everything was going to be okay.

I don’t know how long it took, but I saw Niall visibly relax.

I closed my eyes and counted to ten, all the energy draining from my own body.

“I’m sorry.” I mumbled pathetically. “We’re real pieces of work, huh, Irish?”

A soft smile played on Niall’s lips as Paul came over to the scene.

“Are you alright?” He asked Niall. “Because we really have to go, I’m sorry.”

I watched Niall nod and stand up, following Paul, Harry behind him.

“That was scary as hell.” Harry remarked. “I can handle one, but two at the same time?”

“You did great, Haz, really.” I replied softly. “Thank you.”

Harry scoffed.

“I love you, that’s what I’m here for.”

I wanted to cry. I wanted to tell him that I wanted him physically here. That I wanted to hug him and cuddle him and bury my face in his chest.

But I knew that he couldn’t physically be here, and that I needed to accept that.

“I love you so much, Harry.” I said shakily.

“Go get some sleep.” He replied. “We’ll be together again before you know it, okay?”

And there he goes with reading my mind again.

I hung up the phone and got into bed, curling up in a ball and trying to sleep, even though I knew at this point that I never would sleep.