Secret Smiles in the Snow

Sina stepped into the stall after checking that the coast was clear. Despite the bitter winds that slipped through the cracks in the outhouse, Sina quickly unfastened her pants and then winced as the freezing air bit at her exposed skin. To aid in distracting herself from the cold, she daydreamed and smiled about kissing Jon, wishing that she was back in his warm arms. She did her business and she was starting to pull her pants back up when the outside door slammed. Sina quickly hoisted the multiple layers of material higher, eager to leave, and then the wooden door to her stall was shoved forwards, almost smacking her in the face. She stumbled backwards as a ranger looked on, spying the fact that she was a woman.

“Rolar, what are you doing?” Sina asked in her fake deep voice as she hurried to fasten the ties of her breeches.

“What is a woman doing at the Wall?” Rolar grunted and Sina’s heart skipped a beat from fear. She briefly considered her options and then bolted for the door. As soon as she grabbed a hold of the handle she was flung backwards and skidded across the ground. Sina looked up in time to see Rolar sliding down the plank of wood to lock the door and her eyes widened with dread.

“You can’t do this,” Sina said as Rolar approached her.

“What are you gonna do? Everyone thinks you’re a man, you won’t blow your cover,” he argued and Sina made another break for the door. This time when Rolar grabbed her arm he didn’t let go. She cried out in pain and Rolar pulled her backwards, wrapping his arm across her stomach to hold her tight against his body. Despite her struggles, Rolar still managed to untie her pants and he shoved the layers down to the ground.

“The Lord Commander knows!” Sina cried out, desperate to get him to stop.

“Liar,” Rolar snarled before a bang echoed from the door. “Piss off!” He momentarily stopped groping at Sina as the door was shoved against once more.

“Help me!” Sina shouted as she writhed in the man’s arms. A rumbling growl came from the other side of the door and it was so inhuman that Rolar loosened his grip from fright. Ghost had been outside for his own toilet stop and had heard Sina’s distraught cries. He was now barging his shoulder into the door as Jon and Sam sprinted through the snow to his side. Jon withdrew Longclaw and shoved it through the gap in the door, hoisting the sword up to lift the heavy plank of wood that had barred the door. Ghost ploughed into it again and Sam was the second to rush in. Rolar threw Sina to the ground and she hastily pulled up her clothes as she bit back her tears.

“Si, are you hurt?” Sam asked as he rushed to her side with Ghost, ignoring Rolar. Jon sheathed his sword and stared at Rolar with an unmistakably angered expression. He stormed into the outhouse and grabbed Rolar’s arm, yanking him to the side and pressing a dagger against his ribs.

“You speak and you die,” Jon said lowly before stealing a glance over at Sina being comforted by Sam. “Move.” Jon shoved the ranger forwards and took him back to his quarters, ensuring that the dagger was hidden to avoid suspicion. Once inside, Jon shoved the younger man forwards and glared at him, trying to weigh up his options.

“She’s a woman!” Rolar spat as he turned around. He was met with Jon’s fist.

“That does not give you the authority to rape her!” he bellowed as Rolar rubbed his bleeding lip. “You came here because you were a rapist. This was supposed to be a chance to start over.” Jon’s voice conveyed his disappointment in his brother of the Night’s Watch, but his eyes were cold and gave away his rage.

“I didn’t really want that. No one wants to come to the Wall,” Rolar said with a shake of his head.

“If your choice before was death or the Wall, what do you think your punishment will be this time?”