He Only Says He Loves Me When He's Drinking

“You’re a cheat, Adams, a downright cheat.” Elijah huffed, with a small groan as he threw down his Xbox controller after another gruesome loss. This caused a booming, victorious laugh to break from his friend’s chest.

“I’m no cheat, Eli, you just suck. Face the facts, you’ve never won a game against me, and you never will.” Jacob tossed an evil grin at his friend, a smug look drenched over his face.

“As much as I’d love to agree with you, that’s a complete lie. I won for, like, a week straight in ninth grade!” Eli countered, his pride withholding if only for a little bit, though it was ultimately crushed once again.

“I was under heavy medication, idiot. If you could only beat me only days after my wisdom teeth were removed, then I recommend you not brag about it.” Jacob shrugged, scooting into a sitting position and taking a sip of the day-old Coca-Cola can on his friend’s table.

Eli shrugged, his frown deepening into his dimpled cheeks. “Whatever, I still won…then anyway.” He argued, throwing his arm to hit Jacob in the chest. “Now get up, fat ass, and turn off the games. If I do recall, we have a date to get too.” Eli teased, knowing full well that he was going to be sitting with his other single friends – Jordan and Daniel – while Jacob and his girlfriend got all cuddly again.

Jacob rolled his eyes, standing up. He let himself stretch after being cramped up on the same beaten up couch that he had grown up on. With a yawn, he leaned back, letting the most bottom sliver of his stomach show between his worn jacket and his jeans. Eli tried his best not to stare at his best friends toned stomach, but he couldn’t help it sometimes. He wasn’t into his friend, but he could easily appreciate the other boys very fit body.

Eli watched as Jacob climbed over the sea of unopened textbooks, which they were supposed to be studying, to turn off the game console. “Get your ass up, dude, we can’t be late or Kennedy is going to flip.” Jacob grinned his cheesy “we are so in love” smile and slipped on his jacket.

“I still don’t understand how you can be so obsessed with a girl, even if the girl is Kennedy.” Eli rolled his eyes, saying her name in the lovesick tone that his friend usually got. Everyone knew that Kennedy was easily the most desirable girl at Dalton High. She had the looks, the brain, and the personality. She was a beautiful girl, but Eli didn’t want her because she was, well, a girl.

“You wouldn’t get it, she doesn’t have a penis.” Jacob cooed, causing Eli to throw a pillow at his teasing face. Everyone knew that Eli was gay, he had been for several years now, but no one treated him any differently. No one even made fun of him, besides for Jacob and his other close friends, of course, but that was okay, because that was their job.

“Don’t knock it ‘till you try it, dude.” Eli stood up, pulling on his jacket. “You won’t know what you’re missing until you feel a man’s touch.” Eli stated dramatically, jokingly running his hands down Jacob’s chest, to which Jacob pulled away as expected.

“How dare you! You didn’t even buy me dinner first!” Jacob exclaimed in mock-astonishment. He only broke out of character when he took note to Eli’s green eyes, which were rolling once again. This caused another booming laugh from Jacob. “Anyway, I prefer a girl to protect.” He winked, thrusting his hips slightly to illustrate something just a little more graphic than ‘protecting.’

Eli shook his head, giving up on his friend. “Well when you want a real man, you know where to find me.” He teased, with a obviously fake wink. “You’re an idiot, now come on, it’s getting late, and last thing we want is Kennedy’s famous ‘Where are you?’ calls.” He urged his friend, ignoring the pattering heart and jealous itch he got from his friend’s gestures.

Jacob checked his phone just in time for it to beep. He shrugged and glanced up. “Speak of the devil.” He smirked, flipping open his phone. “Yes, Ken, we’re on our way.” Jacob stated, grabbing his unopened backpack and heading out the door.

Eli chose to stay back for a few seconds, watching his friend walk away. That boy was on a leash and everyone knew it, even Kennedy. Especially Kennedy, and Eli hated it.

Kennedy had always been a part of their group, ever since she moved it. Since middle school, it had been the five of them. Daniel, Jordan, Kennedy, Jacob and Eli. Jacob and Eli had grown up together, their parents being life-long friends, so naturally they were the closest. They never did grow out of playing video games and eating all night. They had always talked about girls, and boys for Eli as of tenth grade. Nothing had ever been different, well, until Kennedy suddenly got closer.

It had been almost a year since Kennedy and her last boyfriend broke up. He cheated on her, or something. Eli didn’t really care. All he cared about was the fact that this Venus Fly Trap with Prada clothes and lip-gloss-covered lips was now hooked onto his best friend.

Long story short, there had been a rivalry ever since. Each of them were fighting for Jacob’s attention, to which Kennedy usually got. Face it, pair any pubescent boy with a choice of a gay boy or a pretty girl, and we can just guess which they will choose. That’s just the way it was, and Eli became okay with that.

He wasn’t broken out of his thoughtful trance until he heard the obnoxious car horn. Eli shook his head, ran a hand through his tousled brown hair, grabbed his jacket, and ran down the stairs.
“I’m coming, I’m coming, calm down!” Eli exclaimed getting into the car, sliding back against his seat. “The princess can wait like, five seconds.” He complained, only half joking.

“You’re a mess, Jones.” Jacob shook his head, reaching forward to turn on the radio, at the same time as Eli, Their hands collided, as they made eye contact for just a minute. They both pulled their hands away, keeping the radio off as they drove towards Kennedy and their friends in silence. Eli shook his head, ignoring his tingling hand. ‘The pretty girl is waiting.’ He repeated in his head. ‘The pretty girl is waiting, and the pretty girl always wins.’