Status: Up and running!

My 30 Day Challenge

Chapter 11

Day 2: What part of your body is most affected by it?


I didn’t get any sleep at all that night. I told Vic I was fine, and left him to go to sleep, but he didn’t go easily. I’m not sure why he bothers.
I decided I’d go for a walk, get some fresh air. The sun had barely risen; enough time for me to walk a fair distance and back before breakfast. I got dressed in my usual jeans and long sleeve t-shirt, and was on my way out of my room when I saw a note taped to my door.

I’m not going to be at school today, I have an appointment. You and Mike need to get to school another way. DO NOT LET HIM DRIVE.

Today’s question is ‘what part of your body is most affected?’ I’ll be back later in the afternoon. We can talk about it then.

Have fun.


An appointment? Was he just ditching again? I guessed I’d find out later. For now, though, I was going to go and burn calories I didn’t need to.

I didn’t bother leaving a note for the Fuentes’. I’d be back before they could worry.

I headed down the street, taking note of where I turned so I could find my way back. My muscles were stiff from not moving much overnight, but it was nice to stretch them for once. I never really got the opportunity to do this back in Oregon; it was too dangerous. My area of the city wasn’t very nice, so it wasn’t safe to walk around unless it was the middle of the day.

I pushed thoughts of today’s question out of my head; I could deal with them later with Vic. Instead I forced myself to think about anything other than that; how nice the day was going to be, from the looks of it, how I’d blown off the guys yesterday afternoon and how I would say yes next time, how I was apparently going to a party on Friday night. Hell, I was not looking forward to that.

After what felt like a half hour of walking away from the house, I turned around and walked back. When I got home, no one was even up yet, so I went back to my room and lay down on my bed, thinking still. I started to wonder where Vic was. I’d ask Mike later.

And there was my main problem, which I had conveniently forgotten – Mike put someone in hospital. His parents didn’t seem too worried about anything he might have done, from what I could tell. I couldn’t ask; for one thing, how the hell do you say ‘hey, I heard you put a guy in hospital. True?’ Also, Jack had asked me not to mention his name, and Mike would surely ask where I’d found out. My only real option was to wait until he decided to tell me.

When I went down for breakfast, Mike was surprisingly already there.

‘Kellin, hey. We have to get the bus this morning, unless you want me to call Jaime or Tony,’ he said through a mouthful of cereal.

‘Uh, I’m fine with whatever,’ I shrugged, getting my own bowl. I didn’t want to piss the guy off now; I was so scared!

‘I could drive, I suppose…’

‘Vic told me not to let you drive,’ I said drily.

He mumbled something that sounded suspiciously like ‘motherfucker’ under his breath. ‘Anyway, mom and dad are gone for this afternoon. I don’t really plan on doing much; if you want me to like, show you around town or something, let me know. Otherwise I’ll probably make plans with someone at school.’

‘Nah, I’m fine. Go do what you want.’

‘Sweet! I really don’t want to have to deal with people on the bus, so I’m gonna call Jaime, alright?’ I nodded. Finishing my food, I headed upstairs and sat on my bed waiting. A moment or two later, Mike popped his head around my doorway and said ‘He’ll be here in two.’ I went to the bathroom, quickly brushed my teeth, grabbed my bag, and headed downstairs, where Jaime was parked but Mike was not in the car.

‘Hey, Kellin,’ he greeted me.

‘Hey, I murmured back shyly. I still wasn’t particularly comfortable around him, or Tony. I just didn’t know them that well. Mike came running out the house a moment later, and we headed to school.

Seven torturous hours later, I was standing at my locker, trying to figure out what to do about getting home, when Jack showed up unexpectedly.

‘Yo, Kellin, I know you couldn’t come yesterday, but I saw Mike leaving school today with Oli Sykes, and Vic wasn’t here today, so I figured you’d be free, and I was wondering if you wanted to come over?’ he blurted out quickly.

I smiled. ‘Sounds great.’

‘Awesome! Let’s go.’

Jack lived, like, two streets away from school, so we walked. When we got there, his mom greeted us. She was scarily nice. She even offered to make us food!

‘No, mom, we’re fine,’ Jack mumbled, going red. He then grabbed my hand and dragged me down to their basement, where there was a giant TV and a wall basically full of CDs, movies, and video games.

‘Oh my God, dude, you have so much stuff…’ I trailed off, staring in awe.

‘Yeah, my older brother’s kind of a nerd, so it’s all his,’ Jack said, voice slightly off. I frowned.

‘I thought you were an only child?’ I asked, honestly caught off guard.

‘Okay, maybe they’re mine,’ he said embarrassedly. I laughed; I could tell the afternoon would be one of the best I’d ever had.

And it was. We played a bunch of games (Jack destroyed me in every single one), watched a movie, and just sat and talked. Jack was probably the best friend I’d ever had; better than Laura or Jackson had ever been. I was never really their friend, though. I just sort of tagged along with them.

Eventually, it got to about 7pm, and I figured I should head home.

‘Alright man, I’ll drive you there,’ Jack said happily.

When we got there, which was surprisingly not long after we left, I saw Vic pacing through the window.

‘Well, thanks for this afternoon, man, it was great,’ I said awkwardly. ‘And thanks for the lift, too.’

‘It’s no problem, seriously. Come over whenever you want. I’ll see you tomorrow, I guess,’ he said, and smiled before driving off.

I made my way inside, feeling happy for the first time in a while, until I was accosted by Vic.

‘Where the hell were you?!’ he demanded, and he looked furious.

‘I-I was at J-Jack’s house,’ I stuttered, nervous as hell.

‘Why didn’t you tell me? Or Mike? Why were you even there?’ he said, seeming to calm slightly. ‘And where is he, too?’

‘I couldn’t really tell you, it was sort of last minute. And Mike apparently ditched school with someone whose name I don’t remember –‘

‘Was it Oli Sykes?’ he asked quickly.

‘Uh, yeah, that sounds like it could be it.’ He looked away for a moment. Seeming to lose all of his former rage, he stepped back from me and leaned against the wall.

‘I’m sorry I jumped down your throat. I was… worried, I guess. I thought… I thought…’ he seemed not to be able to say it, and instead slumped down the wall. I understood what he was trying to say, though, and sat down next to him.

‘Well, I didn’t,’ I said softly.

‘I know. And that’s great,’ he said, smiling, before he paused.

‘Did you think about today’s question?’ he asked after a moment or two of silence.

‘Shit, no. I forgot it,’ I said in apology.

‘What part of your body is most affected.’ Oh. Right.

I thought about that for a second. It was kind of hard to figure out; I had more cuts on my body, but the ones on my arms were deeper. I ended up deciding that they were just as bad as each other.

‘My torso, and arms,’ I whispered. He looked at me sadly for a moment.

‘Can I… can I see? Please?’ This I hadn’t bargained on, and I froze. ‘Only if you want to,’ he added quickly.

Could I show him? It was like a test. Slowly, I stood up, and motioned for him to do the same, which he did. Gently, I tugged my shirt off, and pushed my pants down slightly, so he could see the worst of it. He gasped.

‘There’s so many,’ he breathed, probably to himself, but I heard. It didn’t bother me too much; I knew there were. Without my realising, he stretched out a hand to touch them. I flinched at the contact, and shied away.

‘Kellin, it’s okay,’ he began, but I was gone. I went straight for the bathroom, and locked myself in there.

I could hear him shouting and banging on the door, but ignored it. I began to cry. I had thought he would just leave it at seeing them. But it was too much. It reminded me of what would happen when Mark and Tom got me after school, and why I did what I did, and I broke. I searched through the drawers, and eventually found what I was looking for.

The blade came down on my stomach and slowly, red dots began to appear. I wasn’t going to go too deep, but I needed to do this. Slowly, I carved a T, and smiled, continuing. When I’d finished, I looked at my handiwork.


For good measure, I added a couple more lines to my collection. Then I lay down on the floor curled into a ball, and finally, for the first time in days, fell asleep.
♠ ♠ ♠
One more tonight, then I can sleep. And by sleep I mean blog.

Comment pls