Stealing Glances

Atlanta, GA

Despite it being only a week on tour, tension was flowing on The Maine’s side—amongst the members. Ever since John had found out about Jamison and the guys keeping in touch and their reunion behind his back, he had been passive aggressive with his band mates—that had not gone unnoticed.

It had only been 4 shows in and so far, but tour had been going smoothly. They had the day off in Atlanta before for their show there the next day and Jamison had invited everyone out to dinner in Athens at the infamous 5 & 10 restaurant for a tour dinner.

The guys had just arrived to the hotel, still on the bus ready to set off for their day off.

“So, dinner is at 7—we all need to meet back here by 5:30 cause the vans are getting here then so we can drive up.” Chris announced, as everyone shook their heads.

“Whatever, I’m not going.” John mumbled, “You guys can go and—do what you guys do.”

“Is there something we did wrong? Cause you’ve been acting weird towards all of us…” Kennedy asked, hesitantly wondering what had been going on with John.

“Very passive aggressive.” Garrett said, with a slight scoff.

“Yeah there is…” John said, speaking a bit louder. “How could you guys not tell me you’ve been in touch with Jamison? How could you guys even be her friend after everything? I thought you were on my side.” He watched as each of his band mates looked at one another a bit guiltily.

“We’re not like in elementary school anymore there are no sides—you know we’ll always have your back and our loyalty is with you till the end. But you’re not the only one who lost someone—we did too.” Jared said, trying to reason with John hoping he would at least understand where they were coming from.

“I’m not going to pretend everything is okay, when it’s not.” John said, his voice still loud. “I’m not going to pretend all is dandy by inviting people to dinner and shit like that.”

“Who’s pretending? You don’t have to spend time with her but you can’t hold it against any of us if we spend time with her—especially when she’s trying so hard to make this all less awkward for all of us.” Pat said, his voice slowly matching the volume of John’s.

“That doesn’t change anything.” John said, shaking his head. “Not for me.” He knew he was probably acting like a child throwing a tantrum but he didn’t care.

“I know what she did was hard on you, that it hurt you but are you really going to just not talk to her for 3 months like she doesn’t exist?” Kennedy asked, looking at John in a bit of disbelief at his childish comebacks.

“Maybe.”

“I’m not going to pretend she doesn’t exist– not of us are.” Garrett said, pointing at himself, then the others who nodded in agreement. “So you just need to stop being so passive aggressive with us and just suck it up.” He shouted, causing everything on the bus to seem a bit quieter than it was.

“Whatever.” John spat, sounding like a 5 year old of some sort while crossing his arms. “Be that way then…”

Garrett rolled his eyes before throwing his hands up in the air in defeat; he wasn’t going to let his day off be ruined by John acting immature. He walked off the bus letting out a sigh as Jamison had walked towards him.

“You alright?” She asked, looking at the exasperated loo Garrett was trying to cover but failing to do so.

“Yeah… John is just being a leader singer right now.” He let out a sheepish chuckle.

Jamison looked at him sympathetically. “Not to sound too vain, but is it about me?”

“John is just being lame… he’ll get over himself.”

“You know, if you guys can’t make it out tonight for dinner. Don’t worry—“

“I for one am not a person to turn down a free meal.” He assured her with a smile, “Nor is anyone else from our team. You’ll see us tonight.” He reassured as she gave a weak reluctant smile.

“Good to hear, I’m going to go do some filming stuff—I’ll see you tonight.” She said, giving him a final wave before walking off to meet Peter inside the hotel.

The rest of the guys had slowly made their off the bus doing their respective things on their day off—Pat doing some social media related stuff, Jared and Kennedy going out for lunch, and the crew had been inviting to an outing with the other crew members, which had left John on the bus alone to stew in his mood before he had to call-in a radio station for an interview and other press related things for the day that Molly had booked.

John’s phone began to rang, he checked the caller ID to see it was Molly. He suddenly felt an ease of some sort wash over him. Their twice-a-day phone calls (their last calls of the day being to one another) had been his mental saving grace from being mentally drained by his band mates.

“Is it the end of the month yet?” He asked, chuckling breathlessly as he answered his phone.

“Not yet…” Molly laughed at his greeting, referring to her visiting at the end of the month on tour. “How are you? How have the shows been?

“It’s been surreal. The crowds have been the biggest we’ve ever played… and the response has been good.” He answered, with a lazy smile. “Meeting a lot of new faces and familiar ones too.”

“That’s good to hear.”

“What have you been up to?”

“Just writing emails to Tim for press stuff while you guys are on tour.” She said, typing away at her laptop as John laughed to himself.

“Always working.”

“Not all of us can have a job that requires rocking out every night.” She teased, causing John to laugh again something he had really needed to cure his stress.

“Can it be the end of the month already?” He whined. “It’d be nice to see your face again, I already miss it quite terribly.”

“Patience is a virtue. But the feeling is mutual” She giggled. “What are your plans for since you have the day off?”

“Jamison invited us out to dinner tonight at this restaurant called 5 & 10 but I don’t think I’m going to go.”

“Hugh Acheson’s place?” She gasped in surprise. “You know he’s an amazing cook and won a James Beard award, which is the Oscars of food.”

“I do now.” He chuckled. “How does she know him?” It seemed like now more than ever Jamison had known even more people, something that didn’t surprise John but curiosity had gotten to him.

“When Jamison had a release party for her album—he catered the event.” She began explaining. “They clicked—ever since then, she has been in his food world befriending chefs and food people.”

“Interesting.” He mused.

“But how could you hate Jamison Song?” Molly giggled. “I don’t think I’ve ever met someone who didn’t like her…”

John internally sighed to himself as his girlfriend said those words. “I’m sure there’s some people out there.”

“I dislike whoever dislikes her.” She joked, letting out another giggle. “You should go—Hugh makes great food and it gives you a chance to get to know everyone on tour. Free meal? Good people? Aren’t you all about the camaraderie that comes with being in a band and on tour?” She challenged, causing John to break out into a smile.

“You’re a very good influence you know that?” He teased, breaking out into another smile. “Making me be all social and things.”

“I try.”

“I miss you… a lot.”

“I do too.”

“I got to go do some press soon, courtesy of my lovely girlfriend but I’ll call you later tonight?”

“Can’t wait.”

Meanwhile, Jamison had sat outside the patio of her hotel room as Peter set his camera up to film some interview portions for Jamison’s possible DVD project he was thinking about doing like he had done for Butch years ago.

“Can we start off with some easy questions?” Jamison asked, half jokingly causing both her and Peter to laugh as he began recording.

“Let’s talk about your tattoos and the stories behind them…” Peter said, “What was your first one?”

“I don’t have too many to be honest and most of them are on my right side of my body… well my arm area to be more specific.” She said, lifting her right arm a bit and looking at it. “The first one I ever got was this anchor treble clef hybrid… it was kind of a spontaneous one—the person I went with to get this with kind of just sprung it on me. But it was a good one to do; it reminds me music is my anchor. I had to have my first tattoo a music related one.”

“We’re here.” John announced as Jamison looked around her surroundings.

“What are we doing here?” She asked, looking completely confused by where they were.

“You’re getting a tattoo today.” John casually declared causing Jamison to look at him completely baffled.

“Say what?” She said, wondering if she had heard the words John had said correctly or if she was hearing things.

“You’re getting a tattoo today…”

“Dude, I don’t even have my ears pierced…” She began to panic, “Also, how am I supposed to decide what to get in like no time at all? Without thinking about it…”

“You must have had something in mind for awhile… now is your time to seize the moment. Carpe diem that shit… you can do it. I’ll be with you the entire time.” John reassured her putting his hand upon her encouragingly.

Jamison just stared at John for a moment without saying a word, looking like she was having an internal conversation with herself. “Let’s go…” She began opening the door.

The two walked into the parlor to see a burly man in his 40’s with a massive amount of tattoos all over his visible body parts as well as a matching massive beard. He walked over to John and Jamison with a smirk upon his face before giving John a hug.

“John. I see you brought my next victim with you.” The man said, looking at Jamison with a grin.

“As promised… this is Jamison.” John introduced, gesturing over at Jamison who stood next to him. “This is Joe. He is my hometown tattoo artist… for a better lack of term.”

“Nice to meet you.” Joe said, as he let out his hand for Jamison to shake.

She accepted his hand and smiled, “Same here.”

“Be gentle with her…” John joked. “You’re her first.” He punched her arm playfully causing her to sheepishly chuckle and look at the floor.

“I will.” Joe said, reassuringly to John.

“This all makes sense now.” Jamison said, looking over at John. “All that food we ate was to prepare me for this…” She pointed at him in an accusing manner.

“Guilty.” John said, putting up his hands in surrender.

Joe laughed at the two and their banter. “Anything for you today John?” He asked, looking at John.

“Nope, I’m good. Take care of Jamie here.” John said, putting his arm around Jamison’s shoulder before giving it a pat.

“What did you have in mind?” Joe asked, looking at Jamison who took out her phone and was going through it.

Jamison dug through her phone gallery for a bit before finding what she needed. “Can I get something like this?” She asked, handing Joe her phone.

“Oh… nice.” Joe said, “Where did you want it?” he took a quick once over at her.

“Side of my wrist is fine. About the size of a nickel.” She said putting up her right arm and pointing at the spot on her wrist where she wanted her perspective tattoo.

“Let me just draw this up and I’ll be back with you.” Joe said, indicating he would be taking her phone over to his workstation before walking off.

“What are you getting?” John asked, as he took a seat in the spare chair next to the tattoo bench.

“Anchor with a treble clef incorporated into it.” She described. “I had to make the first one a music related one… and I’m sure you get the symbolic meaning behind it.”

“Interesting choice. I like it.” John said approvingly.

Joe had come back and began imprinting Jamison’s tattoo onto her wrist. With her free hand Jamison grabbed John’s hand the entire time closing her eyes every once in awhile worrying about the pain as John stayed beside her for moral support. After Joe was done, he had held up a mirror for Jamison to see the completed tattoo as well as giving her tips on maintaining and aftercare for her new tattoo.

“Thank you.” Jamison said, as she shook her arm a bit from it being numb from immobility.

“What’s the damage Joe?” John said, taking out his wallet.

“This one is on the house—you are quite loyal to me.” Joe said, patting John on the back giving him a knowing smile.

“I’ll be back soon.” John reassured him, giving him a thankful look as he put his wallet back into his pocket.

Joe chuckled and gave John a mock salute. “I’ll be here.” He said, before turning his gaze over to Jamison. “I hope to see you again, we’re now bonded.” He pulled her into a hug.

“For sure.” She said embracing him. “Thanks Joe.”

The two walked out back into the parking lot to John’s car.

“So, do you hate me?” John asked, wondering if he had maybe pushed his limits with what he had planned for her.

Jamison shook her head and gave him a small smile as she stared at her wrist. “45 minutes of mild pain… worth it.” She looked over at John to let out a quiet sigh of relief.

“I’m glad.” He said, as he put on his seatbelt and started his car.

“What about the heart on your hand?”

“This is a matching tattoo that I have with Butch Walker and Brendan Benson. We got it towards the end of my first tour ever—“The Lonely Hearts” tour I did with them. It’s a mixture of a milestone and our love for each other... they really are like my family.” She explained, looking at the heart outline on her hand.

Jamison looked over at the side of her inner wrist to see the SIN tattoo and showed it to the camera before going on about the meaning behind it.

“I have a tattoo that says “SIN” on it and it’s actually Jake’s handwriting and he has one that says “SONG” in my handwriting. This one we got as a friendship tattoo for basically 10 years of friendship. Jake means the world to me… he’s one of the few that has seen me at my best and worst and we both often hear that we were like made to be friends—I really do believe that. So we got this to always have a piece of each other around.” She explained, showing the camera her side of her inner wrist that was being covered by the charm bracelet that Jake had given her.

“Is that all you have?” Peter asked, knowing to his knowledge those were the only ones she had.

“I have the number five in roman numeral inside my pinky.” Jamison said, showing off the inside of her right pinky. “Not many people realize I have this—but this one… this one is a bit of a secret.” She gave a small, almost secretive smile. “I’ll leave it at that… I like the idea of leaving a bit of mystery out there.” She chuckled, nodding her head in agreement to her own words.

July 2015

Jamison had walked into a place where she thought she’d never walked into again, despite it being a few years and only being there once—she still remembered exactly where it was and nostalgia washed over her as she walked into the tattoo parlor.

She saw Joe, the burly man who owned the place with the same massive amount of tattoos all over his visible body parts as well as a matching massive beard. He looked up and looked at Jamison trying to go through his memory and remember her name.

“Hey Joe.” She greeted, with a smile.

“Jamison, right?” Joe said, looking at her with a quizzical expression hoping he was right with his guess at her name. “John’s friend?”

Jamison nodded, even though the statement hadn’t been true anymore. “Right.”

“What can I do for you today?” He smiled, happy to see her familiar face.

“I have a milestone coming up and I wanted to get a tattoo to commemorate the occasion.”

“What and where can I ink you?”

“Five in roman numeral inside my right pinky.” She said, showing where exactly she wanted to get tattooed.

“I can make that happen.” He said, gesturing for her to sit on his tattoo bench. “Take a seat.”

After drawing out a stencil on her finger, Mike began inking the inside of her finger.

“So, what is the occasion for?” He asked, trying to distract her from the pain knowing that finger tattoos had been some of the most tedious spots to get done.

“I actually have an album coming out…” Jamison admitted, realizing she only had about a month before her album would be released to the world.

“Awesome, when?”

“August 4th.” She answered, feeling sentimental even saying the date of when it would be released.

“So why are you getting the number 5 tattooed on your finger?” He gave her a perplexed look.

“There are a few reasons.” She answered, vaguely with a smile. “Made a lot of promises with this pinky to someone—just felt right to get this.”

“And… we’re done.” He said, wiping off the final area he had done.

After doing a bit of after care, he walked Jamison over to the counter as she took out her wallet waiting to be told how much she would have to pay.

“How much do I owe you?” She asked, looking at Joe after they stood in silence for a moment.

He put his hand up, “This one is on the house.” He assured her.

“Am I just going to be getting free tattoos from you?” Jamison chuckled, looking at him with an eyebrow raised.

“I except you to send me a copy of your album.” Joe said, matter-of-factly crossing his arms with a look of triumph over his face.

Jamison smiled at his proposition and nodded. “I’ll even sign it and everything.”

“Your first one tattoo still looks good…” Joe said, examining her wrist smiling at his handy work. “I remember when John came to me telling me he would bring you in. That boy looked so determined and infatuated all at once.

She looked up at him in disbelief by his confession. “He did?”

“He did.” He nodded, “I think he had a huge crush on you…” He gave Jamison a smirk causing her to chuckle sheepishly.

“You think?” She asked, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear averting her gaze.

“I know he did.” He said, sounding so sure of his own observation. “That look on his face—that was the look of a boy who was falling in love.”

Later that night, in their rented vans everyone had headed to Athens for dinner at 5 & 10. Walking in they were immediately greeted inside the empty restaurant by the chef and owner Hugh.

After seating where their names had been on written on place cards and drinks being served. John had been seated with Pete, Brendon, Mike, who was doing sound for Fall Out Boy, and Dave, who had been doing FOH for Jamison. The first course had come out with Hugh explaining, what the dish was and that had been the pattern of the night. Throughout the night, conversations and laughter were shared and John had begun forming a friendship with Brendon and Pete who had both kind of taken John in as the newest member to their circle.

Right before dessert was about to be served Jamison got up from her seat and tapped the glass of wine she was drinking with a fork to get the attention of everyone.

“I just want to thank Hugh and his staff for such a beautiful meal and hosting us tonight.” She said, looking over at Hugh who looked at her with a welcoming smile. “To everyone on this tour, especially the crew. Thank you for making this all happen every night. I hope this dinner just shows my appreciation to every single one of you on this tour—it wouldn’t be the same without any of you guys. So let’s make the next 3 months together something great—to being golden.” Jamison rose her glass of wine as everyone followed along.

“To being golden.” Everyone said, in unison before clinking their glasses with the person beside them.

A few minutes later, dessert had come out to finish the meal. Everyone had one by one gone up to Hugh and his staff and thanked them for the wonderful meal.

“Hugh, you’re great. Thank you for tonight.” Jamison said, giving the chef a hug.

“My pleasure dear friend.” Hugh smiled, “What are your lunch plans for tomorrow? You should bring your band and crew over for lunch at Empire.” He offered, referring to his other restaurant Empire State South in Atlanta.

“Richard actually invited us to his place for lunch on the house.” Jamison said, with an almost apologetic smile.

“Now I look like the bad person for charging you for dinner tonight if he’s giving you a free meal.”

“I basically only paid for ingredients and like an hour of labor.” She assured him. “I got the better end of the deal in this exchange.”

“Still. I will one up that offer—as I always try to upstage my fellow colleagues.” Hugh said, with a laugh. “Come out for breakfast tomorrow at Empire, I’ll have reservations and breakfast for 15 ready for you.”

“You’re the best. But it’ll be great seeing your family and Richard’s tomorrow at the show also.” “Your tickets and passes are at will call.”

“Thank you for making me coolest dad of the century.”

“Any time.” She smiled. “We’ll get them some merch and introduce them to the bands before the show since I know they have a bedtime.”

“You are the best Jamison Song… I will have a special breakfast waiting for you and your people. Come around 9-ish? We should be ready.”

“Thanks.” She smiled, as Jake came up beside her with a look of content on his face. “I’m going to sleep well tonight—we all are. So I thank you for that.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” Hugh said, nodding his head. “Good seeing you guys as always.” He looked at Jamison and Jake with a smile.

The next morning Jamison, The Black Widows, and the crew had gotten ready to head to Empire State South for breakfast. With room still remaining at the table for breakfast Jamison had invited 4 of the 5 band members of The Maine to breakfast, who had all graciously and happily accepted. The breakfast was filled with food just as delicious as they consumed the night before and the guys bonding with The Black Widows and Jamison’s crew, whom they all had admired professionally.

Later in the afternoon, after lunch and sound check Jamison had met up with Hugh, Richard, and their daughters to introduce them to the bands along with giving them a small tour around the tour bus and backstage area.

The Maine had about almost an hour till their set would begin and did what they usual do by just hanging out and relaxing in the dressing room. There was a knock on the door before they all collectively had said, “come in” just then Jamison had peered her head in.

“Hey, do you guys mind having some guests say hello to you?” She asked, giving them a hopeful smile.

“Not at all…” Pat said, getting up from the couch and putting his drumsticks he was practicing with on the coffee tables

Jamison opened the door wider and slowly unfamiliar faces came walking through the door. “Come on guys…”

Two older men, one being Hugh whom they met the night before and earlier in the morning, stood behind three younger girls who had a look of happiness on their faces while one of each wearing a Fall Out Boy, Panic! At The Disco, and The Maine shirt.

“You guys met Hugh.” Jamison said, gesturing over to Hugh who gave them a quick wave. “This is Richard Blais.” She introduced the man next to Hugh who quickly began shaking each of the guy’s hands.

“Nice to meet you.” Richard said, giving a smile and firm handshake.

“Who are these lovely ladies?” Pat asked, as he looked over at the three young girls who stood in awestruck at the sight of them.

“This is Riley, Clementine, and Beatrice.” Jamison introduced, as they all just continued to stare at the guys in awe. “Riley is Richard’s daughter and Beatrice and Clementine are Hugh’s daughters. They are quite the fans.” She said, holding back a chuckle.

“How old are you guys?” Garrett asked, with a slight smirk, as they seemed to be rendered speechless.

“Riley is 8.” Richard filled in, chuckling at his daughter’s reaction.

“Clementine is 12, and Beatrice is 14.” Hugh said, looking at his two daughters with a smirk.

“Let’s get some CDs signed, shall we girls?” Jamison said, as the girls just nodded their heads with their CDs clutched to their hands.

Each girl went up to the members of the band and got their CDs signed along with a small conversation, more or less—Riley being stuck to Jamison’s leg. John was at the end of the “line” they had as Jamison walked up to him with Riley hiding behind her clutching her “Eclipse” CD.

“Riley, is a bit shy… but you’re her favorite.” Jamison said, looking over at Riley with a smile. “Why don’t you introduce yourself Riley?” She suggested, as Riley just shook her head.

For a slight moment, John had seen Jamison as the girl he first met when they were recording for Forever Halloween—the one who would babysit Declan or Jamie Blue. A sense of nostalgia ran through him as he smiled at the interaction between Riley and Jamison.

John smiled to himself before crouching down to Riley’s eye level and giving her a smile. “Hi, I’m John. Nice to meet you.” He introduced, letting out his hand for her to shake.

“Nice to meet you.” Riley mumbled, letting out her hand for John.

“Would you like me to sign your CD?” John asked, as he continued to stare at Riley with a smile.

Riley handed over her CD to John, “Yes please.” She smiled, causing John to break out into an even bigger smile.

“So, can you tell me how to spell your name?”

“R-I-L-E-Y.” She spelled out phonetically for John.

“That’s a really pretty name for a pretty girl.” He said, causing Riley to turn even more red than she already was.

“I think someone’s heart is melting.” Jamison said, with a chuckle. “Hey Riley, how about you give John a hug?”

Without being told twice, Riley ran into John’s arms and hugged him as tight as she could causing John to chuckle.

“Wow, you must really like me…” He said, jokingly with a laugh.

“Let’s all get a group picture for the girls…” Jamison suggested, as she motioned for someone to hand her their cell phone.

“Great idea.” Richard said, handing Jamison his cell phone.

The girls and The Maine began huddling together for their group shot as their fathers awkwardly stood behind them.

“Girls, do you want your daddy’s in it or is that uncool?” Jamison asked, looking through the phone screen to capture the photo.

“I guess they can be in it.” Clementine said, rolling her eyes causing everyone to chuckle at the pre-teen’s sass.

“Yeah. Sure, why not?” Riley said, nonchalantly with a shrug as everyone began gathering in together for the photo.

“Alright… on 3— 1. 2. 3.” Jamison said, as the camera phone made a click noise. “Let’s get one more without the dads stinking it up.” She joked, gesturing for the dad’s to get out of the photo.

After a few photos, Jamison handed back the phone to Richard.

“Alright, I think we need to get to our seats.” Hugh said, looking at the girls who looked crestfallen causing everyone to chuckle. “Thanks so much again for doing this Jae.” He gave Jamison a hug before Richard followed suit.

“Anything for you both.” She said, with a smile. “It was good seeing you guys again.”

“You too.” Richard said, “Whenever you’re in town or if we’re on the left coast let’s get together.” As Jamison nodded her head in agreement at his proposal.

“Girls, can we say thank you to The Maine?” Hugh said, looking over at the guys with a grateful smile.

“Thank you.” The girls said in unison causing the guys to internally “aw”.

“You’re welcome. We hope you guys have fun tonight.” Jared said, with a wave.

The group walked out with Jamison staying back giving a look of gratitude at each of them.

“Thanks again guys, you really made their night.” She said, appreciatively.

“Of course.” Kennedy said, nodding his head like it had been nothing.

Jamison stared at each of the guys for a moment before giving one final appreciative smile. “Have a great set tonight guys.” She said, before walking out of their dressing room.