Double D Does Not Mean Damsel in Distress

"How's that translator coming?" The voice of his idol, a charming, charismatic note that had once left Edd feeling elated now only served to grate on his nerves like a younger sibling. He knew without turning that Tony was leaning on the edge of his desk, that cocky grin splitting his face as he tilted his head, waiting for the head of department to give him a full report.

A report he'd given three times already that day.

"Nothing new to report, sir." The exasperated reply was called over his shoulder. The translator program was open on the three-screen computer that sprawled out across the desk and the hardware was naked on the elongated window sill that served as Edgar's workbench. He fiddled with the tiny screw driver in his hand, trying to focus on the project at hand. It was a overlaying project he'd undertaken the first day he became head of department three weeks prior. Stark had been thrilled with the ideas that came pouring from Edgar and encouraged him to act upon them. The current hardware he was working on was one of three parts to a larger whole and once finished, the entire set up would be complete.

"Your patience is almost alarmingly inexhaustible." Another voice spoke from behind Tony, this one had a more flat tone and was unfamiliar to Edd. A small smile tugged at the intern's lips.

"Well, yes. I have had years of practice." He thought fondly to the years in the cul-de-sac, fiddling with some little invention while Eddy pranced around him yammering on about jawbreakers and girls and money, eager to get on with their get-rich-quick scam. Eddy and Ed had been a million times more unnerving than Mr. Stark. And besides that, the pay-roll kept him more than happy enough to dance about to the playboy's every little whim.

"Oh, Banner, you have no idea. He's like a Buddhist monk... Actually I think I could get a monk angry easier than I can ruffle this one's feathers." The two men chuckled as Edd continued fiddling with the tweezers and other tiny tools.

"I should be done with this tomorrow, Mr. Stark." He said without looking behind him. He heard Tony shift slightly and presumed he was turning without actually taking his elbow off the table.

"You know, Banner, this kid made a lie detector out of a toaster when he was twelve?"

Edd snorted slightly, remembering how long it took him to perfect that little gem.

"Hardly. Though, I did manage to get some accurate readings off of it once I figured out the wiring... and I had to buy my mom a new toaster..." A thought occurred. Setting down the tiny screwdriver, the intern swiveled to face the two men.

"How did you..." The words died on his lips as he took in the visage of the most renown nuclear physicist of the century. Banner... Bruce Banner. Of course Tony Stark would be buddy-buddy with some one as ridiculously famous as Bruce Banner. The two of them were Edd's biggest influences in the scientific world. He mumbled something under his breath about good karma for all those puppies he rescued and all the quarters he'd given to homeless men. The two men looked at him for a moment and Tony turned to Bruce with a lopsided grin.

"Told you he was amusing. Hear the little mumblings? It happens all day long, you should see him when he gets mad. It's actually quite adorable." Stark stood suddenly, gesturing from Edgar to Bruce.

"Bruce, this is Edgar my newest head of International Communications Department and soon to be the developer of a nifty little ear piece that will automatically translate any known language into your native language in as much real time as grammar will allow. " The billionaire grinned with the pride of a child showing off his super special awesome dog's newest trick. Edd rolled his eyes. Usually the billionaire playboy was rude, and irritatingly antagonistic but his already erratic behavior had taken a sudden flop towards just plain pathetic, and the man was prone to a sort of 'failure' in his narcissistic asshole-ery. It had begun happening the past couple days, and somewhere in the back of Edd's mind he made a mental note to continue to study this. This recent weirdness aside, his shyness in the face of Tony's fame had long since died off, leaving Edd with the same easy sarcasm he used to deal with Eddy.

"Mr. Stark if you keep calling me adorable people will start talking." He stood smoothly, pulling on the prim cuff of his white lab coat- which he had insisted on wearing over the stupidly high priced shirts Tony had bought for him, claiming that the head of department should be the best dressed. He extended a hand to Banner, his nervous smile edging the confidence that he'd managed to paint onto his features. "It's an honor to meet you, Mr. Banner."

"Oh please, just... just Bruce is fine, really." The lazy drawl of the scientist was soothing, making Edd feel more at ease and the gentle but firm grip was comforting. "Tony has been telling me about your program, sounds pretty revolutionary." Edd straightened, not being able to help the grin that spread across his face. He was proud of himself and of course, having his two idols gushing about his ideas was enough to blow his ego into monumental proportions.

"Would you like to see it work?" He lifted a microphone to Bruce, offering the business end then turned to the computer and tapped a few keys. Though the computers here were all touch-screen and the process of working the information was basically like finger painting, very tactile, he still preferred using keyboards and key stroke short cuts. The middle screen went blank for a moment then a straight, horizontal line strode across half way down the screen. The bright green line worked it's way across and became continuous, like an ekg monitor. The screen to the right filled with a long list of languages, each written in their own language and the left screen went blank.

"It's set up currently to assume the wearer of the equipment is an American speaking English. Speak any language you want into that." He indicated the small receiver in Banner's hand.

Bruce lofted a brow and said something in Arabic. As soon as he began speaking, the center screen pinged like a heartbeat and the languages on the right began blinking then disappearing as the program ran a process of elimination based on the inflection and pronunciation. Halfway through his sentence the third screen typed up the words in English, and the speakers Edd had hooked up spoke in English, in Banner's voice.

"Are the graphics really necessary?" was spoken followed by, "Wow, that's pretty impressive." The words were only a few seconds delayed from the Arabic spoken by Bruce. Edd nodded, running a hand through his hair.

"Yes, the graphics are rather unnecessary however they help with the presentation of the product." He tapped a few things on the keyboard and brought up the blueprints of the original design.

"I have Phenias compiling a program that runs idioms, slang and misspoken words into the most accurate translation." He squirmed slightly, feeling awkward that he was instructing other people to do his work, but he did have an entire department needing something to do. Delegating was proving difficult to grow accustomed to but his crew were all eager to work with him and willing to take initiative, making his job as their boss far easier. Bruce nodded in approval, looking around the desktop and seeming to take in the program that was on the screen.

Tony walked around the desk and slapped Edd on the shoulder.

"See, told you I knew how to pick'em. And Blossom is doing well in my weapons development division, in case you were wondering." He glanced at Edgar to see his reaction to this. Edd ignored him, mostly due to the uncertainty if the comment was directed at Banner or himself. Also on account of his last interaction with Blossom. The girl was smart, intimidating, and on the whole-over bearing. When he had been younger, Edd had found that sort of thing attractive, but after years of abusive relationships he now shied away from a prominent woman.

Not to mention the fact they'd dated in highschool. That had been an awkward introduction oversee by the one billionaire playboy philanthropist who should never attend such a reunion. Edd decided to change the subject.

"How'd you know about the toaster thing, anyway?" The intern glanced over at Tony, keeping his peripherals on Bruce as the physicist prodded various things on his desk. Stark laughed and slapped his back once more.

"I met your room mate in the Lobby yesterday and we had … coffee... and spoke about various... different … things, you know, just trying to learn more about my employees." The far-off dreamy look told Edgar that Marie had probably shown Mr. Stark her automobile collection featuring many classics the billionaire was sure to enjoy. Not to mention the fact that Marie looked quite stunning in a jumpsuit.

"Yes, well, don't believe everything you hear." Edd rubbed his neck nervously, hoping that Marie hadn't blabbed too much about their own relationship.

"Oh yea, she told me." The knowing tone behind Stark's words threw the intern for a loop and he wondered if he'd been mumbling again.

Marie and himself had dated a bit in high school and into the first few years of college and even moved in together. After several years of being together, they had slowly drifted into a more casual friendship and finally, officially, stopped dating one night after a surprisingly blunt conversation. They had been sitting on the couch, watching How I Met Your Mother when Marie, without even turning to him spoke as lightly as though discussing the weather.

"You're gay, aren't you, Edd?" It had actually taken Edgar a moment to process the words that had been said. After a swig of soda he nodded slightly.

"Yea. Pretty sure." And with that, they remained friends and later in the year moved into a two bedroom apartment and began dating other people. Well, Marie dated other people, Edd never seemed to be able to find the time. The blue haired girl gave him hell about it from time to time, but it was all in good fun.

That was a year ago, and Edd still hadn't told anyone else. Eddy, Ed and even his own parents were none the wiser. Except now, of all people, Tony Stark was privy to the knowledge.

Edd nodded slightly.

"Fair enough." He fought to play it all off as though it didn't bother him. Homosexuality was so common now a days it seemed silly to be as secretive as he was.

"And that's why I want to go drinking with you! Grab your keys, Bruce, you coming buddy?" Stark strolled away towards the door and Edd sputtered.

"Wh-a- wait. What?" He blinked stupidly at the wolfish grin on Tony's face.

"Anyone who can't hold their liquor it too fun to pass up." Was the cool reply before Mr. Stark rolled off the door frame and into the hall. Edd gave a heavy sigh and silently thanked Marie for having more tact than he gave her credit for. Drinking was a terrible idea, but he decided it wasn't worth arguing. Bruce laughed and shook his head slightly.

"Always the party." The quiet man said softly, bitterly. Double D gave a short barking laugh before taking off his lab coat and hanging it on the chair.

"I never liked parties." Was all the intern said before walking out after the two men.