Two Things That Take Away My Pain

I never thought it could happen to me i thought i was strong enough prayed through enough i was but i stopped when i met her. No it wasn't her fault it was my fault it was a learning from experience type of deal. Well we meet on the bus and we started to talk and hang out and she was different from me you could tell, she wore all black most of the time and didn't talk hardly to any except to friends, and when she did get in her talkative moods she would go on forever. But she told me things no one else knows except for a couple of people and I was one of those couple of people and that thing she told me and showed me was she cuts. I was shocked i was scared for her i thought of her as my bff. So a couple months after that I was having a terrible day i started off with a ink pen and I know your probably laughing but i got to the point where it would bleed and then something sharper then one day found my brothers pencil sharpener and i decide to take the razor out so that's what i do I give it up for awhile throw it out the door the back door (kinda stupid now that i think of it cause i go outside barefoot sometimes. I know now not to do that. Then after two months i am having the wort day of my life between me and my mama telling her that I cut. Then after that i was panicking i was pacing around the house going back and fourth back and fourth and then i go to the bathroom and get a shaving razor and take the razor out of there and cut and kept them in one of my socks hidden behind my dresser. And then me and my friend had a sleep over and she said i needed to stop because i was getting worse then she was, so we made a deal she would stop if i would stop. We stopped being friends after awhile but if it wasent for prayers and her i would be still cutting today.

I was raised with by brother Jeremiah. Well after Jeremiah was born my dad went and stated making my new little brother Damian and don't get me wrong i love him with all my heart! And no i don't remember this my mama told me. Then my mama and dad got a divorce when I was 3 and then 8 years later my little sister came along. Then my step dad showed me the ring that he was going to give my mama on day before getting out of the car