Status: Active
Just Swimmingly
Chapter 6
Chapter 6
Scott
Did the girl that looked like Jennifer just kiss that guy?! I paused my iPod. It looked a lot like her supposed ex boyfriend, too. Maybe it really was her, and maybe it really was him. I shook my head. Whatever. Why should it even matter to me? She can kiss whoever she wants; she's not mine. My heart gave this weird lurch when I thought that. She's not mine. I sighed. What the hell had gotten into me? I just met her today, for goodness sake. I hit play on my iPod and made my way back home. Anywhere But Here by Mayday Parade played in my ear. I was careful when I walked by Kinny's house. Something jumped on my back. Shit, I wasn't careful enough. I paused my iPod.
"Why are you creeping outside of my house at night in dark clothes, Scott?!" she asked me giddily.
"Don't flatter yourself, I'm on my way to my house."
"I'll go with you and we can have some fun in your room."
"Kinny, no." I looked at her.
"Wh-what? Why not?"
"Why are you acting like this is the first time I've told you this?" I asked her angrily. "We are not dating anymore."
"Why? Wasn't I-"
"Yeah, you were good enough. But now you're too much," I told her.
"Too much?!" she repeated in disbelief. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?!"
"You're clingy." She gasped.
"I am not!"
"And you always want to have sex."
"Well, if you were a real man, you would too!"
"Sorry I didn't want my first time to be with a whore." Her eyes lit up with anger and indignance.
"I'm not a whore!"
"If it looks like a whore and talks like a whore, then-"
"Don't tell me what I am!" She angrily got up in my face. "You don't know me, Scott Kirkland!"
"Maybe that's part of the reason we're not together anymore; you can't let me in, but you expect me to let you in and make you my whole life, as well as my first priority." She considered it.
"So you're saying that if I told you everything you would be my boyfriend again?"
"No."
"Dammit, Scott! What are you saying then?"
"I'm telling you why we broke up, and this is the last time I'll do it. So please just leave me alone." She gasped and slapped me.
"You can go to hell, Scott! You don't even know me!" She went back into her house and I continued onto mine. Strangely, nothing she said affected me much. I felt...numb.
Jennifer
From: Hayden Cell
I'm excited to see you at the concert! Wear the top you wore when we met, k? ;)
Hayden wouldn't stop texting me, and I couldn't sleep. Ricky was snoring, Ryan was snoring, my dad was snoring, and my mom was either sleeping silently for once or not sleeping at all. I got out of bed and went into the kitchen for a glass of water. That's when I heard the sobbing on the couch.
"Mom?" I asked quietly. All the noises stopped.
"Jennifer?" I walked over to her and sat by her feet. This was rare; she usually never showed emotion. In fact, up until now, I was convinced she had no emotions, unless apathy to mild irritation counts.
"Mom, what are you doing down here?"
"I'm just...watching a bunch of romance movies. You know how those tear me up." Uhm, actually I didn't know that. I didn't even know she liked movies.
"But the TV's off." She looked at the black screen.
"Oh, the sleep timer must've just gone off."
"Mom. I've been awake the whole time. I didn't hear the TV on at all." My mom sighed.
"You're right," she admitted tiredly. She sat up and looked me in the eyes. "I've been getting calls," she admitted.
"From who?"
"From Ricky's dad."
Scott
"Jennifer, please-" I begged her. We were alone in a misty forest, and tree roots were scattered haphazardly around. Some were even in places that didn't have trees. The dust from the dirt ground was mixed with the mist. The trees had ivy and vines on them. The place smelled like a forest, and strangely, it smelled like home.
"No, Scott! Leave me alone! I was fine before I met you!" She was wearing white and grey plaid shirt with a bloodstain on her shoulder. A chip in her shoulder.
"But I-" I failed to find the words that would make her trust me, and that made my heart heavy.
"I said no!" She ran away, nimbly jumping over the tree roots, never once stumbling. I chased after her, just as quick. Why was she trying to ditch me?
"Baby, please!"
"Fine." She whipped around and I accidentally ran into her. The chip flew out of her shoulder and into a tree trunk. "You wanna know all my secrets?"
"Please, I just want to help."
"Okay." She proceeded to tell me everything about her life, from her birth until now.
"Jennifer," I started nervously. "Will you...marry me?" Her eyes widened in surprise.
"Really, Scott?" She sounded disbelieving. As usual.
"Yeah." I sounded confident. She bit her lip nervously.
"Okay." She was suddenly wearing a white dress and had a radiant glow. She looked so beautiful, my previously broken heart mended. I felt something wrap around my shoulders and cover my arms, and sure enough, I was wearing a black and white tuxedo. I leaned in and kissed Jennifer with a new found passion. She tasted delicious, and she was finally all mine.
"I love you," she whispered in my ear.
---
I sat up straight, and my alarm clock went off. What was up with that dream? And why was it one of the best dreams I could remember? I walked into my bathroom and took a shower, still thinking about the dream. Thinking about how beautiful Jennifer had looked, and how my heart sped up when I saw her. Thinking she was mine. I took a deep breath. Chances are, the dream meant nothing, but, the thing is, I wanted it to mean something. I got out of the shower and walked downstairs. My mom wasn't making breakfast, so I decided to do it. As I cracked eggs and flipped pancakes, I couldn't stop thinking about the dream. I brought a plate of eggs, bacon, and pancakes and a mug of coffee up to my mom. She began to stir when I walked in the door.
"Oh, you're up early, Scott." She smiled as I put the plate of food and cup of coffee on her nightstand. I hesitated.
"Mom, what does it mean when someone has a dream about someone they barely know?"
"Well, I'm no expert, but I think it means you want to get to know that person better," said my mom quietly. "What was the dream about?" I froze. What would she think if I told her I dreamed about marrying a beautiful, mysterious girl with excellent music taste?
"I was in the woods with this girl," I began. "And I, uh, proposed to her." My mom smiled.
"What did she say?" Good, at least she didn't think I was creepy for dreaming about Jennifer.
"She didn't believe me at first, but that's just how she is," I laughed. "But then we got married, right there in the woods."
"And how was it?"
"It was beautiful. And she was...breath-taking."
"Sounds I should meet this girl." I looked at her.
"Why?"
"Well, why not? It sounds like you have feelings for her." We were both quiet.
"How can I have feelings for her? I barely know her."
"Do you think your father and I knew a lot about each other when we first met?" she asked quietly. I didn't say anything. "Well, the answer is no. I just knew that his name was Frank Kirkland and that he was the handsomest young man I'd ever set my eyes on. So I told him, and we went out the very next night."
"That's cool, Mom, but this girl, she just...doesn't let people in."
"Then I guess you'll have to fight your way in, if you think she's worth it."
Jennifer
I couldn't look my mom in the eye the next day when I was getting ready for school. She'd left my iPod on the counter, probably as a peace offering. I took it, but I wouldn't forgive her. Turns out I went to Hayden for nothing now. If I would've known she was going to give me my iPod back within twelve hours, I would've been able to cope. But how dare she cheat on my father? Oh, it all made so much sense now. Why she babied Ricky, why she treated Ryan and I insignificantly, and why she seemed so distant about everything. What a selfish bitch. I bet my dad knew it, too. Ricky barely looks like him, but he looks like Ryan, my mom, and I. Who did she think she was fooling when she said "He probably just inherited more of my genes"? If I couldn't stand my mother before, I didn't even know what to do or how to feel now. I knew had to tell someone, but who? Not Hayden, because knowing him, he'd write a song about it and/or use it against me in the future. I had no friends besides...well, did Scott count? No. If I was doubting it, he definitely didn't count. Ryan was my last choice. But should we tell Ricky? Honestly, I would love to see that little bastard suffer, but not like this. Something like this would hurt the whole family, not just the individual. When Ryan walked out the front door to his car, I followed him.
"Can we car pool today?" I asked him. "I'm low on gas."
"Oh...uh, I guess? But you'll have to wait for me until after practice."
"That's fine." We climbed into the car, and I realized I'd never really been alone like this with my brother in a long time. The silence was filled with tension, and I missed when it used to be comfortable. I took a deep breath and broke it.
"Can I say a few things?" He glanced over at me quickly, pretending like he was checking his mirrors. He started the car.
"Sure, what?" He started to back out of the driveway.
"I miss how we used to be as little kids."
"Okay."
"And I'd really like to go back to that."
"Okay."
"And why are you acting like you don't care?"
"O- Wait, what?" The back of his car hit the trash cans, knocking them over. "I care." He got out and checked the damage. I picked up the garbage, and we both got back in the car. It was quiet again. "I really do care, Jen." He started the car and made his way to our school.
"Then why do you let them tease me?" I asked. He didn't say anything. "Aren't you supposed to be the one I can trust? The one that will hurt anybody that hurts me?" His jaw tightened.
"I don't know what to say," he admitted. "You seem like you cope with it alright." We arrived in the parking lot, but neither of us got out.
"Who copes with bullying alright? We don't cope. We deal with it and learn that sometimes you get the short end of the stick. Nobody should have to go through it, especially when they have a potential way out." I opened the door.
"Wait." I stopped. "What was the other thing you wanted to say?" I took a deep breath.
"Mom cheated on Dad." Ryan turned pale.
"How did you know?" he whispered. I felt my face get hot with anger.
"You knew?!" Ryan nodded.
"Well, yeah. It was kind of obvious, don't you think? Ricky is blonde like Mom, and you, me, and Dad all have dark hair. Ricky gets babied and we have to do everything, and Ricky's an asshole."
"They're only babying him to make it hurt less when they tell him, aren't they?"
"Yeah, that's what I think." It was quiet for a beat.
"Should we tell him?"
Scott
Did the girl that looked like Jennifer just kiss that guy?! I paused my iPod. It looked a lot like her supposed ex boyfriend, too. Maybe it really was her, and maybe it really was him. I shook my head. Whatever. Why should it even matter to me? She can kiss whoever she wants; she's not mine. My heart gave this weird lurch when I thought that. She's not mine. I sighed. What the hell had gotten into me? I just met her today, for goodness sake. I hit play on my iPod and made my way back home. Anywhere But Here by Mayday Parade played in my ear. I was careful when I walked by Kinny's house. Something jumped on my back. Shit, I wasn't careful enough. I paused my iPod.
"Why are you creeping outside of my house at night in dark clothes, Scott?!" she asked me giddily.
"Don't flatter yourself, I'm on my way to my house."
"I'll go with you and we can have some fun in your room."
"Kinny, no." I looked at her.
"Wh-what? Why not?"
"Why are you acting like this is the first time I've told you this?" I asked her angrily. "We are not dating anymore."
"Why? Wasn't I-"
"Yeah, you were good enough. But now you're too much," I told her.
"Too much?!" she repeated in disbelief. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?!"
"You're clingy." She gasped.
"I am not!"
"And you always want to have sex."
"Well, if you were a real man, you would too!"
"Sorry I didn't want my first time to be with a whore." Her eyes lit up with anger and indignance.
"I'm not a whore!"
"If it looks like a whore and talks like a whore, then-"
"Don't tell me what I am!" She angrily got up in my face. "You don't know me, Scott Kirkland!"
"Maybe that's part of the reason we're not together anymore; you can't let me in, but you expect me to let you in and make you my whole life, as well as my first priority." She considered it.
"So you're saying that if I told you everything you would be my boyfriend again?"
"No."
"Dammit, Scott! What are you saying then?"
"I'm telling you why we broke up, and this is the last time I'll do it. So please just leave me alone." She gasped and slapped me.
"You can go to hell, Scott! You don't even know me!" She went back into her house and I continued onto mine. Strangely, nothing she said affected me much. I felt...numb.
Jennifer
From: Hayden Cell
I'm excited to see you at the concert! Wear the top you wore when we met, k? ;)
Hayden wouldn't stop texting me, and I couldn't sleep. Ricky was snoring, Ryan was snoring, my dad was snoring, and my mom was either sleeping silently for once or not sleeping at all. I got out of bed and went into the kitchen for a glass of water. That's when I heard the sobbing on the couch.
"Mom?" I asked quietly. All the noises stopped.
"Jennifer?" I walked over to her and sat by her feet. This was rare; she usually never showed emotion. In fact, up until now, I was convinced she had no emotions, unless apathy to mild irritation counts.
"Mom, what are you doing down here?"
"I'm just...watching a bunch of romance movies. You know how those tear me up." Uhm, actually I didn't know that. I didn't even know she liked movies.
"But the TV's off." She looked at the black screen.
"Oh, the sleep timer must've just gone off."
"Mom. I've been awake the whole time. I didn't hear the TV on at all." My mom sighed.
"You're right," she admitted tiredly. She sat up and looked me in the eyes. "I've been getting calls," she admitted.
"From who?"
"From Ricky's dad."
Scott
"Jennifer, please-" I begged her. We were alone in a misty forest, and tree roots were scattered haphazardly around. Some were even in places that didn't have trees. The dust from the dirt ground was mixed with the mist. The trees had ivy and vines on them. The place smelled like a forest, and strangely, it smelled like home.
"No, Scott! Leave me alone! I was fine before I met you!" She was wearing white and grey plaid shirt with a bloodstain on her shoulder. A chip in her shoulder.
"But I-" I failed to find the words that would make her trust me, and that made my heart heavy.
"I said no!" She ran away, nimbly jumping over the tree roots, never once stumbling. I chased after her, just as quick. Why was she trying to ditch me?
"Baby, please!"
"Fine." She whipped around and I accidentally ran into her. The chip flew out of her shoulder and into a tree trunk. "You wanna know all my secrets?"
"Please, I just want to help."
"Okay." She proceeded to tell me everything about her life, from her birth until now.
"Jennifer," I started nervously. "Will you...marry me?" Her eyes widened in surprise.
"Really, Scott?" She sounded disbelieving. As usual.
"Yeah." I sounded confident. She bit her lip nervously.
"Okay." She was suddenly wearing a white dress and had a radiant glow. She looked so beautiful, my previously broken heart mended. I felt something wrap around my shoulders and cover my arms, and sure enough, I was wearing a black and white tuxedo. I leaned in and kissed Jennifer with a new found passion. She tasted delicious, and she was finally all mine.
"I love you," she whispered in my ear.
---
I sat up straight, and my alarm clock went off. What was up with that dream? And why was it one of the best dreams I could remember? I walked into my bathroom and took a shower, still thinking about the dream. Thinking about how beautiful Jennifer had looked, and how my heart sped up when I saw her. Thinking she was mine. I took a deep breath. Chances are, the dream meant nothing, but, the thing is, I wanted it to mean something. I got out of the shower and walked downstairs. My mom wasn't making breakfast, so I decided to do it. As I cracked eggs and flipped pancakes, I couldn't stop thinking about the dream. I brought a plate of eggs, bacon, and pancakes and a mug of coffee up to my mom. She began to stir when I walked in the door.
"Oh, you're up early, Scott." She smiled as I put the plate of food and cup of coffee on her nightstand. I hesitated.
"Mom, what does it mean when someone has a dream about someone they barely know?"
"Well, I'm no expert, but I think it means you want to get to know that person better," said my mom quietly. "What was the dream about?" I froze. What would she think if I told her I dreamed about marrying a beautiful, mysterious girl with excellent music taste?
"I was in the woods with this girl," I began. "And I, uh, proposed to her." My mom smiled.
"What did she say?" Good, at least she didn't think I was creepy for dreaming about Jennifer.
"She didn't believe me at first, but that's just how she is," I laughed. "But then we got married, right there in the woods."
"And how was it?"
"It was beautiful. And she was...breath-taking."
"Sounds I should meet this girl." I looked at her.
"Why?"
"Well, why not? It sounds like you have feelings for her." We were both quiet.
"How can I have feelings for her? I barely know her."
"Do you think your father and I knew a lot about each other when we first met?" she asked quietly. I didn't say anything. "Well, the answer is no. I just knew that his name was Frank Kirkland and that he was the handsomest young man I'd ever set my eyes on. So I told him, and we went out the very next night."
"That's cool, Mom, but this girl, she just...doesn't let people in."
"Then I guess you'll have to fight your way in, if you think she's worth it."
Jennifer
I couldn't look my mom in the eye the next day when I was getting ready for school. She'd left my iPod on the counter, probably as a peace offering. I took it, but I wouldn't forgive her. Turns out I went to Hayden for nothing now. If I would've known she was going to give me my iPod back within twelve hours, I would've been able to cope. But how dare she cheat on my father? Oh, it all made so much sense now. Why she babied Ricky, why she treated Ryan and I insignificantly, and why she seemed so distant about everything. What a selfish bitch. I bet my dad knew it, too. Ricky barely looks like him, but he looks like Ryan, my mom, and I. Who did she think she was fooling when she said "He probably just inherited more of my genes"? If I couldn't stand my mother before, I didn't even know what to do or how to feel now. I knew had to tell someone, but who? Not Hayden, because knowing him, he'd write a song about it and/or use it against me in the future. I had no friends besides...well, did Scott count? No. If I was doubting it, he definitely didn't count. Ryan was my last choice. But should we tell Ricky? Honestly, I would love to see that little bastard suffer, but not like this. Something like this would hurt the whole family, not just the individual. When Ryan walked out the front door to his car, I followed him.
"Can we car pool today?" I asked him. "I'm low on gas."
"Oh...uh, I guess? But you'll have to wait for me until after practice."
"That's fine." We climbed into the car, and I realized I'd never really been alone like this with my brother in a long time. The silence was filled with tension, and I missed when it used to be comfortable. I took a deep breath and broke it.
"Can I say a few things?" He glanced over at me quickly, pretending like he was checking his mirrors. He started the car.
"Sure, what?" He started to back out of the driveway.
"I miss how we used to be as little kids."
"Okay."
"And I'd really like to go back to that."
"Okay."
"And why are you acting like you don't care?"
"O- Wait, what?" The back of his car hit the trash cans, knocking them over. "I care." He got out and checked the damage. I picked up the garbage, and we both got back in the car. It was quiet again. "I really do care, Jen." He started the car and made his way to our school.
"Then why do you let them tease me?" I asked. He didn't say anything. "Aren't you supposed to be the one I can trust? The one that will hurt anybody that hurts me?" His jaw tightened.
"I don't know what to say," he admitted. "You seem like you cope with it alright." We arrived in the parking lot, but neither of us got out.
"Who copes with bullying alright? We don't cope. We deal with it and learn that sometimes you get the short end of the stick. Nobody should have to go through it, especially when they have a potential way out." I opened the door.
"Wait." I stopped. "What was the other thing you wanted to say?" I took a deep breath.
"Mom cheated on Dad." Ryan turned pale.
"How did you know?" he whispered. I felt my face get hot with anger.
"You knew?!" Ryan nodded.
"Well, yeah. It was kind of obvious, don't you think? Ricky is blonde like Mom, and you, me, and Dad all have dark hair. Ricky gets babied and we have to do everything, and Ricky's an asshole."
"They're only babying him to make it hurt less when they tell him, aren't they?"
"Yeah, that's what I think." It was quiet for a beat.
"Should we tell him?"