Spitfire

I sat on the little pier that Nate had built on our pond, the clouds looked gray but the rain had stopped for the most part, I didn't dare let my feet dangle. They didn't drown like we would. I had my knees pulled up to my chest, hugging them, I rested my face on my kneecaps. Swallowing hard, I tried to shake out the horrible flashbacks. It had only been a few days and everyone wouldn't leave me alone, afraid that I would do something as far as try to kill myself. They were even fighting me for me to not sit on this pier, I was traumatized not suicidal.

Rick, Glenn, and Daryl had disposed of Luke and Harry, they had driven off somewhere and dumped them. The idea of those two being buried on this land didn't really sit well with the group, for me? I didn't care, they were gone and there was no way they could hurt me. I almost wanted to ask the obvious question, who killed Luke? But, I wasn't stupid. Glenn and Rick had taken turns keeping an eye on Shaun, afraid that he'd somehow hurt me, I knew Shaun, though. He had a big mouth but he'd never be able to go through with his words. He had already apologized countless times to me, I just never answered or accepted them.

All I wanted was to be alone, to just soak in the events that had happened to me. I felt hollow, there was nothing left of me. I needed time to regain who I once was. I needed to regroup but I couldn't do that with them constantly at my side. I knew Maggie and Carol weren't too far behind me, I was only glad they didn't physically join me. I wiped away a tear, hearing something behind, I turned my head slightly, looking back down at the water when I noticed who it was. Daryl actually had been the only one who left me alone, it kind of stung, but at the same time, he had his own demons to face. He had broken the one promise that was supposed to mean something to me. I looked at him, "Hey."

"Hey." He mumbled, he tossed a stray rock he found into the pond, causing ripples. He looked down at his hands, "How ya doin'?"

I shrugged, "Okay, I guess."

He nodded, giving me a sideways glance, "Sorry I didn't approach ya sooner." He swallowed, looking away, "I needed time too."

"It's okay."

"No it isn't."

I sighed, I wasn't in the mood to fight with him. I was stuck in a depressed state, I didn't feel like doing anything. I didn't have the motivation or the energy. I just felt hopeless. I couldn't even defend myself against one person but yet I could defend myself against a million dead people. "Fine."

Daryl scoffed, "What no fight?"

I looked back down at the water, seeing a faint walker trying to reach for me, "No. I don't have the energy."

He sucked in air, "Ya can't be actin' like this, Anabel."

I shot him a dirty look, "Don't tell me what to do, Daryl."

He snorted, "There's no point in actin' like this. We're all here for ya, don' shut us out. We're all worried 'bout ya."

"I can't just act like this didn't happen, Daryl. It did and the memories aren't leaving."

He stood, anger filling his voice, "Fine, Anabel." He turned to walk away but stopped short, walking back towards me, "Depression's like a war, ya either win or ya die tryin'. What are ya gon' do? Die or win? 'Cause I ain't gon' wait 'round forever while ya figure it out."

I stood up too, this time anger filling my voice, "Who the hell are you to say that to me? I was scared for my life. I seriously thought you guys weren't going to be able to break through that door. I was on the verge of giving up."

"But ya didn't and that should count for somethin'." He got close to my face, "How do ya think it made me feel when I heard ya screams? Knowin' I couldn't do a God damn thing." He pushed away from me, muttering words underneath his breath, before turning back to me. "Ya ain't jus' a stranger anymore, Anabel." With that he walked away, leaving me standing there staring after him.

I groaned when Maggie started walking towards me, I turned back around and plopped down. Waiting for her to grace me with her presence...again. She sat down next to me, turning towards me slightly, she asked, "What's goin' on with you and Daryl?"

I shrugged, "I don't know."

"I think he likes you."

I snorted, "Right and pigs fly."

She laughed, "I mean it, Anabel. I've been with the guy for a long time, ain't ever seen him act the way he does with you." She leaned forward, picking at a thread on her jeans, "I know a thing or two about that kind of stuff. I mean I am with Glenn, I see the way he looks at me everyday. Daryl gives you a similar look, not to mention he was going haywire when you were down in that basement."

I looked at her, "I think your delirious. In case you weren't on Earth a few seconds ago, he just tore me apart."

Maggie nodded, pulling her knees up to her chest the moment she realized there were walkers in the pond, "I know he did. That's why I think he likes you. Ever since that day you brought him back from the woods, his whole demeanor towards you is completely different. Carol loves it, she thinks you two would be a good match."

"Carol already spoke to me about that." I muttered.

She laughed, "I bet she has."

I sighed, "Besides, this isn't a time for being in love or anything like that. You and Glenn are lucky. The world is ending as we know it and in an apocalypse? All you have to do is survive and fight."
Maggie motioned towards the house, "Glenn and I found love in a place like this. Very secluded from the world we know and sheltered. Who's to say you and Daryl won't?"

"It's Daryl Dixon. He's told me himself he isn't that kind of guy."

"Oh, now I know he likes you." She mused.

I scoffed, "You're insane, Maggie."

She sighed, giving me a smile, "I might be. Come on, let's go inside." She helped me up, walking towards the house, I couldn't help but feel angry towards myself. I was stronger than this, I know I'm stronger than this. Daryl was right, it was a war. I had to try, but I wasn't sure if I was actually strong enough. Telling myself I am, is one thing. Doing it, is another story.

The minute I walked inside, I was bombarded with 'Hello's', 'How are you feeling', and 'You okay'. I waved them off, "I'm fine." My eyes fell upon Daryl who was clearly avoiding me, he sat at the table, fiddling and fumbling around with his crossbow. I tore my eyes off of him and looked at everyone, "Can I please just go out?" I hated that I had to run it by them, any other day, I could have just gone out without anyone questioning my sanity.

Rick stood up, "Sure, I'll go with you."

I stopped him, "No." It came out a little harsher than I wanted it to, but I was just so fed up with everyone treating me like a child. "I want to go out by myself."

He gave me a sorry filled expression, "I can't let you do that-"

"-Why? I'm twenty six years old, I'm clearly old enough to go out and take care of myself."

Daryl's head snapped up the minute I released my age, he had been trying to get it out of me for the longest time. He gave me a hard expression, "He's right. Ya can't go out alone."

I groaned in frustration, "This is bullshit." I crossed my arms, looking him straight in the eyes, "Then, you come with me."

He stared at me for a long time before answering, I could tell the rest of the crowd was getting a little antsy, wondering what he was going to say. If Maggie thought he liked me than she shouldn't be the only one. "Fine." I could hear the anticipation wash away from everyone. He stood up, slinging his crossbow around his shoulder, he pushed past me. I rolled my eyes, reaching over the table, I grabbed the handgun that was in front of Glenn. I checked the ammo and clicked it back, following his footsteps out.

The walk out into the woods was fairly quiet, neither of us really had anything to say to each other. We were both clearly pissed off, but that didn't really deter me from wanting him to walk with me, and vice versa. Finally, I placed a hand on his forearm, making him stop walking. He gave me a look, that same look he used to give me when he first showed up. I chewed on my lip, "What did you mean earlier?"

"What ya talkin' 'bout." He sneered. Clearly, still angry.

I dropped my hand, sighing in anger, "Nevermind." Walking forward, he jerked me back, pulling me back to him. "What." I stated, getting even more mad. He couldn't be mad at me and then get all pissy when I returned the anger.

Daryl's face softened, looking down at ground, "Sorry. I'm still mad." He muttered. I hated it how he could never really look me in the eyes.

"And...I'm supposed to be okay with that?" I questioned, giving him an annoyed expression.

"No," He muttered. He sighed deeply, running his hand over his head. "I ain't the one to talk out my feelins', ya know that." Daryl shifted his stance, kind of walking away from me, he looked up at the trees, squinting as the sun beamed down on the both of us. He gave me a sideways glance, with a soft tone, "Ya ain't that bright if ya don' know what I meant 'bout earlier."

I pressed my lips, "Maybe I just need someone to elaborate better." It was kind of making sense in my head, though. I walked forward, leaving only inches from the both of us.

He scoffed, giving me a small smirk. "Ain't that kind of someone."

I smiled, looking down at my feet, "You're telling me." I chewed on my lip, looking back at him, "What does it mean, exactly?"

Daryl shrugged slightly, shaking his head, "I dunno. I ain't used to feelin' this way 'bout someone." He rolled his eyes at my smirk, "Don' go twistin' my words. All I'm sayin' is that-" He paused, "-I care 'bout ya."

"I care about you too." I said softly. I pursed my lips, "So, if I went missing, you'd spend day and night looking for me?"

"I think I woulda done it before all of this."

"Sure you would," I mused.

He chuckled, motioning for me to walk forward with him. We walked in silence for almost an hour before he started talking again, "So ya 26, eh?"

I just gave him a smile, not even going to answer. I kept walking, laughing at his scoff. Off in the distance we saw a group of walkers, slowing down, we gave each other a similar look. We started backing up slowly, they hadn't noticed us quite yet and we were going to keep it that way. I stumbled backwards, but Daryl's quick reflexes saved me from falling on my ass. My eyes widened, I whispered, "Daryl." He followed my gaze, another group was coming up on our right.

He hissed, "Shit."

I looked around me, muttering to myself about where I was. I ignored the glare from Daryl and pointed towards the left, "Follow me."

"Where the hell ya think ya goin'?" He hissed.

I narrowed my eyes, my voice low, "You want to stay alive or not? Follow me." Moving low and quick, we had manged to slip by the group off to our right. I quickly dove down behind a group of bushes and pulled him along with me. I crawled in the center of them, wincing at the small scratches I received from the pricks and points. Pulling him close to me, we both ducked down. Our eyes leveled with a small gap, watching them walk by.

I shivered at their groans and moans, my hand had never left his arm from moments before, I squeezed tightly. Anxious for them to pass. My breath hitched as one stopped right by, I felt Daryl pull me closer into him. I looked up as he pulled a finger to his lips to tell me to be quiet. I clung to him, my hands grasping his jacket.

It felt like hours had gone by, this group was huge. Had to have been about fourty or so of them. Not to mention they probably caught up to the group up ahead. I looked at Daryl, questioning if we should even dare poke our heads out. He gave me a look, he mouthed the words, "Stay here." Daryl then moved out from underneath the bushes.

I yelped quietly as he yanked me from the bush, I narrowed my eyes, "What the hell."

He shrugged, "Let's go." He trudged on, leaving me to trail behind him like a lost puppy. It wasn't until we were close to the perimeter that he turned abruptly around and gave me a dead serious look, "Ya ain't allowed to go out without me."

I rose an eyebrow, "Excuse me?"

"Ya heard me," He snapped.

I walked up to him, crossing my arms, "Oh, I did. I'm just questioning why you're suddenly the boss of me."

Daryl gave me a dirty look, "Ya see how many of those were out there? Ain't no way you gon' go out 'lone now. Not after seein' all them." He narrowed his eyes, "Not Rick, not Glenn, not Shaun, not no one, but me."

"I'm entitled to my own freedom, thank you very much." I stated. Narrowing my eyes, "As far as going out alone, I perfer to go out alone. I don't see why I'd need you to come along."

He got in my face, growling, "Cause I said so." He walked away from me, muttering words, he turned to face me again, "Like I said before, ya ain't a stranger. Can't have ya runnin' 'round and not know where ya are."

I dropped my arms, cocking my head slightly, "Tell me exactly why you can't."

He bit his lip, looking away from me, "I care 'bout ya."

I nodded, "But, you care about Carol, Beth, and Maggie, right?" He nodded, "And do you need to know where they are twenty four seven?" My tone mocking.

He growled, "Ya know it ain't the same damn thing."

"Daryl-"

"-Look. I can't control what I'm feelin'-alright? I jus' know ya drive me crazy-mental crazy. Not only do I have ta worry 'bout my own self, I worry 'bout ya too."

I placed my hands on his shoulders, my voice soft, "But, you don't have too."

He muttered, "Can't help it."

I smiled, placing my hand on his cheek, my thumb rubbing his scuff, "What would your brother think?"

He scoffed, shrugging away from my touch. "Jus' go inside, alright?" I sighed, defeated. I don't think I was ever going to win with this man.