My Apocalypse

With only two weeks left of my pregnancy I was scurrying around to get things ready. I've completely gutted the entire flat. I went through my closet discarding clothes I didn't like into a bag I was going to donate to the local food pantry, I made Max go through his closet too (he threw two shirts in the bag). I bleached every surface and used Lysol on what couldn't be bleached.

“I think someone is nesting,” Robert teased from the sofa.

“Fuck off.” I replied. I was trying to get the vacuum to work, but it just wasn't cooperating. The rug was filthy even though I shampooed it yesterday. Living with men was hard, especially while pregnant. Everything gets so dirty so easy. I was fumbling with the power switch when Craig's feet popped into my peripheral vision. “Craig Edward Mabbitt!”

His sneakers were covered in dried mud. All over my floors.

Craig fumbled with his coffee he was just about to take a sip of when I had yelled at him, trying not to spill it. “What?”

“Can you not read?” I got up and walked to the front door that was visible from where he was sitting. I opened it to show him a sign I had put there two weeks ago. “Did you not see the sign that says in big red bold letters 'please remove shoes before entering'?”

“And cranky,” Craig added with Robert's comment as he tore his shoes off his feet without untying them. He threw them across the living room in my direction. They landed in front of me on the floor with a clunk. Dry mud had come loose and spilled all over the floor I had just cleaned before the vacuum stalled.

I screamed. “Craig! You fucker!”

“You've done it now.” Monte said as he got up from the couch. He raised his hands in defense as he passed me to get to the kitchen. He didn't want to be anywhere near me. He had learned from experience just how crazy I can get whilst pregnant.

“Ash, it's fine. You don't need to catch every piece of dust before it lands on the surface of something.”

“It's fine?” If steam could have come out of my ears there would be enough to keep a sauna going for three days straight. “Craig I just cleaned that fucking floor.”

“If I fix your precious vacuum cleaner will you calm the fuck down?”

I crossed my arms over my chest, “Fine.”

Craig sat his coffee down on the coffee table, making sure to place it on one of the coasters I had left all around the house. He knelt down and tore the panel off the front of the vacuum. “I'm not gonna lie, Ash. I think you killed this vacuum. You use it like eleven times a day.”

“Then I'll just buy a new one.” I sighed. “Max! Take me to Wal-Mart!”

Max emerged from the kitchen where Monte was hiding. He was drying the dishes I had just washed – all five of them. “I'm not taking you to Wal-Mart, Ashley. You don't need to vacuum today.” He poked back into the kitchen before I could protest.

Craig gave up and put the vacuum back together. He sat on the couch next to Robert who was too busy watching Family Guy on the TV. I sighed again and kicked the vacuum, causing to to fall over and roar to life. “Yay!” I shrieked. I bent down to pick it up and started vacuuming at lightning speed before it decided to quit on me again.

I had just about finished when it quit, powering off completely. “What the–?”

I followed the power cord to the outlet. Max held the plug in his hand twirling it. “You need to take it easy, babe. You're moving way too fast; it's not human.”

I blushed, realizing he was right. I was going non-stop of all hours of the day. That kind of movement couldn't be good for Willow. I rested my hand on my bump waiting for Willow to kick. She didn't.

Willow wasn't really active during the day. Doctor Lancaster had said that it was normal, but I still did my kick counts. She was more active at night when I was trying to sleep. She had a habit of kicking me in the ribs. She's woken me up out of a dead sleep by doing that.

“I just want everything to be perfect for when Willow gets here.” I muttered.

Max smiled and pulled me into a hug. I tried to move closer to press myself up against him but my tummy prevented it. I felt ginormous. My tummy stuck out like a sore thumb. Max liked it when he was walking behind me and I turned to the side suddenly. He laughed and thought it was the best thing in the world. I, on the other hand, feel like a hippo. But, I'm glad me ginormous entertains him.

“Everything will be perfect.” He kissed my forehead softly.

Knock, knock.

“I'll get it,” I said, prying myself out of Max's arms.

I didn't expect to see Ronnie on the other side of the door, not in the least bit. I had to pinch myself to prove to my brain that I wasn't dreaming. I hadn't seen Ronnie in a month. We had gotten into another fight and he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He said he didn't care if Willow was his, he still wouldn't step up. I didn't believe him. I knew even though he was a jerk he would do the right thing.

“Hey,” He said.

“Hi...”

Ronnie raked his fingers through his hair. He looked around the hallway before speaking. “Um… can we talk?” I heard Max and Craig laughing from inside the apartment. “Alone?”

“Just let me grab my purse.” I left the door open and grabbed my purse and shoved my cellphone inside. I told Max where I was going. He let me leave reluctantly. I met Ronnie at the door again, shutting it behind me before we walked out to his car.

He had gotten a new vehicle; a black Jeep Commander. He had added a few modifications, like a lift-kit and some white decals across both sides of the vehicle. I had a hard time climbing into the Jeep thanks to my tummy. To my surprise Ronnie helped me get in the Jeep.

“You're a lot bigger than the last time I saw you.” Ronnie commented as he watched me struggle with my seat belt. He buckled his own and put his hands on the steering wheel.

“Thanks Ron,” I muttered. “You knew exactly what to say to a lady.”

He looked like a deer caught in the headlights. “N-No! I didn't mean big as in fat, I meant like the baby is getting bigger and it's just your stomach. The rest of you is still really skinny it's just your bump. Fuck, I'm fucking this up already.”

I laughed, “Calm down. I was just messing with you.”

I finally got my seat belt to click into the lock. Ronnie started the Jeep and headed to the outskirts of town. We found our way to a parking lot for a playground. It was one my parents used to take Craig and I to. I remember because the entire jungle gym is this really ugly green color. It looked like the color of baby vomit. No lie.

“So, what did you want to talk about?” I asked. I decided to keep my seat belt on. I didn't feel like spending twenty minutes trying to get it around my tummy. Ronnie had taken his off so he could turn his body towards me.

“I talked to my family.”

Oh.

“I told them about the baby and our current situation. To put it lightly, they're not happy.”

I scoffed, “Well they're just going to have to get over it.”

“Ashley.” He warned. “They're happy for the baby, but not about us. They think we should get married.”

Married? To Ronnie? HAH!

“You don't even know if Willow is yours, Ronnie. And how the hell do you expect us to get married? We can't be in the same room for more than an hour without wanting to push each other off a cliff. I'm not going to dump Max just because you're family wants us to tie the knot!”

“But if she is mine I don't want her to be a bastard!”

“Ronald. It's two-thousand-sixteen, no one gives a shit about the legitimacy of children anymore. Don't you ever insult my daughter like that again.”

“She's my daughter, too, Ashley.” Ronnie muttered.

“You don't know that!” I yelled. Why couldn't he get that through his thick skull? For all we know she could be Max's or maybe I was the next Virgin Mary?

“I know it for a fact, Ashley!”

“How?”

“You didn't fuck Max.”

I furrowed my eyebrows. “I'm pretty sure I fucked Max.”

“You didn't.”

“His dick was inside me, Ronald. How is that not fucking?”

Ronnie rolled his eyes, “He wore a condom.”

I ignored his comment, “Wait. How the fuck do you know this?”

“He told me.”

I laughed. This is obviously a joke. Max hasn't spoken to Ronnie in months. This was a last attempt to get me back. I looked over at Ronnie. He wasn't laughing. “When the fuck did you talk to Max?”

Ronnie sighed and rested his head on the steering wheel. “A couple weeks ago.”

“So why didn't he tell me?”

“He's always loved you, Ash. He thought if you thought that there was a chance Willow was his baby that you would be with him. It's worked so far.”

“Max wouldn't do that to me.” I protested.

“I hate to burst your bubble, babe, but he did. Willow is mine. Unless you have any other potential candidates.”

My head started spinning. I couldn't believe this – I couldn't. Max would never do that to me. I remember that night. I wasn't drunk. I distinctly remember him saying he didn't have a condom and I told him that I didn't care. My entire world was crashing down on my shoulders.

“W-Will you take me home, please? I don't feel good.” I said.

Ronnie started the Jeep and backed out of our parking spot. He didn't put his seat belt back on. I rested my hand on my tummy. How could Max lie to me like that? That was low; lower than dirt. Ronnie had to be lying. That was a new low for him. I needed to get Max's side of the story.

“So since she is my daughter, can we put Radke on her birth certificate?” Ronnie asked from the driver's seat.

“No. I'm still getting the DNA test. Her last name will be Mabbitt.” I said. Willow kicked.

“Ashley, I just told you that I'm her dad. You don't need to pay for the fucking test.” He looked over at me. I looked away. “Max lied to you, Ash. He has from the start.”

“Stop.”I said.

“I'm telling you the truth. Max is a fucking liar.”

“Ronnie. Stop.”

“No!” He looked over at me again. This time he didn't look back at the road. “She's my daughter, Ashley! She's going to have my last name!”

What happened next is beyond my comprehension.

One minute we're in the Jeep arguing about Willow's last name and the next there's a sonic boom. My ears were ringing. I felt the truck when it hit us. Ronnie had drifted into on-coming traffic at fifty miles per hour. I don't think we were hit head on because I knew I was still alive. I could hear Ronnie yelling so I knew he was still alive, too.

M vision blurred. I wasn't in the Jeep anymore. I could see grass, I could feel it surrounding me. Wait. Maybe I was in the Jeep? I blinked, trying to get my vision to focus. My window was down and grass had come through the opening. I was sideways? Had we rolled?

I looked to my left. Sure enough, Ronnie was in the backseat. His head was bleeding and he was yelling something I couldn't quite make out. The Jeep wasn't up right. I was sideways. We had flipped. A pain shot across my stomach and I felt water run down my legs.

Willow.

I tried to move but I didn't have the strength. I tried to unbuckle my seat belt but a sharp pain went up my arm. I cried out. I heard sirens in the distance. My vision began to blur again, but this time everything was fading to black.

“Ronnie–“

I awoke to a bright light over head.

Am I dead?

I got up off of the grass. I was at the playground again, but how? Everything was so peaceful. You couldn't hear the bustling of the city or the laughter of children. It was silent. Except for a soothing voice calling my name. “Ashley,” a woman called.

The voice was familiar. Too familiar. “Mom?” I asked.

“Over here, Ashley!”

I bolted towards the direction of her voice. I found her on the puke green swing set. She was just as beautiful as I remembered her to be. She had long brown hair like me, a long straight nose like me and Craig's eyes. She just sat on the swing, letting the breeze sway it. “My, look at you!” She smiled.

“Mom, where am I?” I sat next to her on a swing. “Am I dead?”

Mom shook her head, “No, sweetie. It's not your time yet.”

“I miss you so much.” Was all I could mutter. I never thought I would see her again. I had to be dead.

“Your father and I miss you and your brother very much, too. He's done a great job of raising you, baby.” She smiled. Her teeth where just as white and straight as I remembered, too. She was so damn beautiful. “I'm so proud of you, Ashley. I wish you could stay… but you need to be there for Lyric.”

I furrowed my eyebrows, “Lyric?”

“Your daughter.” Mom pushed my hair behind my ears. She cupped my face and smiled once again. “Your father and I wanted to name your brother Lyric Rose Mabbitt before we found out that he was a boy, but your grandmother came to me in a dream. She told me that he was a boy and that I should name him Craig.”

“I should name her Lyric, then?”

Mom nodded. She looked up at the sky and sighed. “It's time to go, Ashley. Your daughter needs you.”

I panicked. “Wait! I want to stay!”

“You can't, Ashley.”

“I can't do this alone!” I shouted. “Mom, please!”

“You'll never be alone. I love you and Craig, and I love my granddaughter very much.”

Everything faded to black.

I squinted as I tried to open my eyes. There was too much light. When I finally got them open I was relieved to see that I was in a hospital room, and not dead. My entire body hurt. I looked to my left to see a white cast on my arm. I had broken it. But how?

Oh.

The Jeep.

I rested my uninjured hand on my tummy. My flat tummy. I jolted up and lifted my hospital gown. Where was my bump? Where was my daughter?

“Ashley! You're awake!” A familiar voice said. I looked over in the direction it came from to see Craig sitting in a chair next to my bed.

“Craig, where's my baby? What happened?” I cried. “Where is Lyric?”

“Lyric?” Craig got up from his chair and wrapped his arms around me. “Shh,” he whispered. “Willow is perfect. She's in the nursery.”

“Her name is Lyric.”

“What happened to Willow? You were dead set on that name.”

“I'll explain it later.” I didn't have time for this. I needed to see my daughter. I needed to see that she was okay with my own eyes. “Is she okay?”

“Yeah,” He smiled. “She's so beautiful, Ashley.”

“Can I see her?”

“Not yet.” He kissed my forehead. “You need to rest.”

I leaned into Craig, letting him hold me for as long as he wanted. “W-What happened?”

“You got in a car accident, Ash.” He whispered. “Ronnie swerved into on-coming traffic. An eighteen wheeler caught the drivers side. It was almost head on. Thankfully you were wearing your seat belt. But, you still broke your arm and the seat belt tightening around your stomach caused you to go into labor.”

Ronnie.

“Where's Ronnie? Is he okay?”

“He's alive. He has a concussion, a broken leg and two broken ribs. He's in his own room, most likely getting an earful from Max.”

Max.

“He lied to me.” I muttered.

“Who?”

“Max… Lyric isn't his.”

Craig sighed, “We'll talk about it later. Just rest now.”

After an argument about letting me see Lyric and Craig threatening me with the nurses giving me sleeping medication I gave up and let sleep take over.