Glory

Preface

In short, I joined the army because you were dying. You know that it was just fear. Fear and that false sense of heroism that you always used to tease me about. But once I was there, there was no backing out. All of that disciplined talk of death and torture and conquest wormed its way inside of me, and changed me. It corroded me in ways you can’t even begin to imagine. It’s not an excuse, but I’m sorry.

I think about the last day you were well all the time. It was a good enough day, to be the last one. You’d braided those stupid daisies into your hair in the morning, and as the day progressed they fell out all over the beach, until the beach was just littered with your stupid daisies. You laughed so much that day. Even though the water was too cold and we were hungrier than ever, you laughed so much. I miss your laugh every day.

I thought about your laugh and those daisies and that day as I watched you gasp for every painful breath. I clutched your hand as you coughed and hacked up pieces of your insides. From the moment you got sick I was at your side. Your mother had practically given up all hope of seeing you well again, and spent the nights that you were sick down at the pub, wailing your sob story to whomever lent her the ear. I don’t hold it against her, and neither should you. She is a woman unfit to deal with grief.

It had been about a week after you had gotten sick when I got the idea. There was no end in sight, no one knew how long you were going to last, but the longer you were sick, the less likely it was that you’d ever make it, so I knew I had to do something soon. On that final morning, I left you with your mother.

The sky was the color of ash as I walked down the narrow little path into town. I knew what I was doing, but only vaguely. The idea of war was in the back of my mind, wrapped in terror. A completely different thought pushed my feet into motion: I had to get you well again. You needed medicine. Medicine costs money. I was going to get you the money, through whatever means necessary.
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I had this idea for a while, I had already created the unpublished story and this draft was in a dusty old folder in my Google Drive, so since I'm back on Mibba for however long, I figured why not put it up?