Bulletproof Love

Chapter Two:

I wake up with a jerk and look around at my surroundings. Where am I? Then I remembered everything - I ran away, Jesse helped me, I left Michigan. I let out a shaky breath - I left to Mexico. Mexico. Outside of the country, I could leave anytime I wanted, I was a citizen, but... it's just so far. And though I'm not leaving much, I am leaving my home, my birth place, my good memories, and I'm leaving Jesse.

Jesse was the greatest friend I could ever ask for. He's been my friend since kindergarten when he saved me from some third grader that thought it'd be fun to push me off the swing I was. Jesse quickly came and punched the boy and helped my weak, bleeding self to go to the teacher. They took me to the nurse and the boy was expelled. After bandaging me up, I was better.

After that, he told me, "If anyone gives you trouble, just tell me." And I did, and that's how it was all through my school years. Up until we graduated college. He protected me from all the bullies and eventually they stopped altogether. I still glares, pushes, and muttered curses, but no one ever really did anything to me, well everyone except him.

When Jesse found out about him, he begged me to leave, to go live with him. But I declined, I didn't want to leave, I wasn't going to let him run me out of my home. But after Jesse found out, everytime I got hurt, I went to him. He helped me get through. He was my best friend, and though I did love him, I wasn't in love with him. The kiss was just us saying good bye, even if it was my first kiss. I'm just glad it was with Jesse.

I was never going to run away, but last night, he pushed it. He was going to take the only thing I held dear. He tried, but failed. And Jesse helped me escape. I was never going to go back to him. I knew I'd call Jesse every chance I got. But I only had the clothes on my back, my book, and a bit of money, at most 40 bucks. And I'm going to Mexico, and we don't even have the same currency. I didn't know Spanish, or anyone there. So I was screwed. What was Jesse thinking?

I panic thinking about how this was the worst decision ever, but Jesse was so dead set on getting me away from any dangers at home. But what about the dangers in Mexico? The law there wasn't as strict as the one here - people did drugs, shootings, rapes, and gangs. Oh, God, what was Jesse thinking?

I stare out the window to calm myself. Watching the trees past by in a blurry frenzy. I was leaving the United States, probably for a while.  Maybe forever. I wasn't leaving much behind, though. I had no friends, no family, and he certainly didn't want me. I was only leaving Jesse. And he's the one who forced me to leave. Not force, but beg. He wanted me as safe as possible. And that was as far away from him as possible.

I see we're entering Kansas and that we were going to have a pit stop. Everyone climbs off the bus except for a few others like myself that stayed. I had nothing to entertain myself with, so I was stuck with getting off the bus to use the restroom. When I finish, I look into the mirror. Everytime I look in the mirror, I look for someone else's face.

I walk out and board the bus. When it's moving again, I feel myself relax because even though I'm leaving everything I know, I realized I'm doing this for not only Jesse, but myself as well. I was saving myself from the abuse. This was for me, no for Jesse. I was living, not just surviving. Finally. I was going to live my life the way I want.

~~~

The bus stopped in Texas and I was getting very nervous. The closer we got to Mexico, the more terrified I became. I kept my book as close to me as possible, it had all my information and my lyrics as well. The closer I got to the border, the more fear ran through my veins. It was really happening. I was really leaving the country. I was really leaving him.

The bus pulled up to a stop and again some got off, some stayed on. I got off to buy food. I went to the McDonald's beside the pit stop and looked around. Texas was really different compared to Michigan. It was hotter here than up there. All you saw were palm trees. They had beaches here. The highways were different. At least I was in a tank top and skinny jeans with Converse, so it wasn't so bad for me. I wonder if they have TOMs in Mexico... Oh my, God, I'm so racist.

All around, I saw tan people, some hispanic, some white with tans. And I knew they were questioning why someone as young as me was on my own all the way over here. I was alone here. That was also a difference between Michigan and Texas - in Michigan I had someone, here I had no one. The worst difference between them, actually. When I finish eating, I went back to the bus. The drivers alternated, and we were off.

I held my breath as I saw the border up ahead. This was it. The drivers pulled over so the guards could check us, and when they finished, we went on our way. And when we pass the bridge, I look back to Texas. It was done. I was gone. I was no longer in the United States. I left.

I look at the bridge and I look at the river. I was no longer on United States soil. I can't believe I did it. I'd never see him again. I look at everyone on the bus, everyone was calm, I was not. Everyone here probably had a normal reason for going to Mexico. I didn't. Everyone was fine with going to Mexico. I wasn't. They probably had a family here. I don't. I was the odd one out, like always.

I look back the the United States and just stare. Good bye, America.