Bulletproof Love

Chapter Eight:

I saw my life flash before my eyes as I said those words. I'll go with you. I felt my knees give out as I said those words. I'll go with you. I felt the tears fill my eyes as I said those words. I'll go with you. I felt Jesse tense up behind me as I said those words. I'll go with you. And I saw Vic smirk as I said those words. I'll go with you.

Vic grabbed my arm and I felt like crying as he did, but Jesse's grip tightened and he pulled me away from Vic. "No, Kellin stays here with me." Vic glares and I see nothing but pure hatred in his eyes as he stares at Jesse. "Listen, JLaw, Kellin chose to go with me. I'm forcing him into anything," he spits out.

"Kellin's only going to protect me and my gang from you." And I bite my lip, hating that Jesse knows me so well. They both turn to look at me, Jesse's gentle gaze and Vic's hard stare. "Is it true, Kellin? What JLaw said," Vic asks me. I look at the them before averting my gaze and nodding. I don't lie and I wasn't going to start now. But wait, JLaw? "Jesse, did he just call you JLaw?"

"Yeah. I use it as my gang name, so no one finds out my real name."

"Why is that such a big deal, anyway," Vic snaps, and I tense a bit before Jesse pulls me into his arms. "Because it's the nickname I gave him, I didn't know he used it," I answer, digging my head into Jesse's chest. I felt happy that Jesse used my pointless nickname in something as important as his gang. Jesse did care about me, a lot.

I turn to look at Vic and see he was glaring even harder now. He was practically growling. I look around and see the other gang leader here, looking at us in amusement. I get out of Jesse's grip, but he didn't notice, he was too busy arguing with Vic. I walk to gang leader. "Hi. What's the name of your gang," I ask, looking up at him. He was tall.

"Of Mice & Men. Name's Austin," he says, sticking out his hand for me to shake. I do, and answer him, "I'm Kellin, in case you didn't hear them say it." Even though I'm pretty sure the whole neighborhood heard. "Yeah. I heard them. Why are they obsessed with you, anyway?"

"Well, Jesse's been my best friend since kindergarten, so that's his reason. I honestly don't why Vic is, though. I met him a few weeks ago and he's kind of has it imprinted in his brain that I am his."

"Well, I don't blame him. You are adorable. And pretty." I blush. "But don't worry, I won't turn crazy like them. I have my own man at home. His name's Alan. Hold on, I have a picture." He takes out his wallet and shows me a picture of him with a red-head. "Aww. You guys look so cute together. How long have you guys been together?"

"We dated for three years and we've been married two years now, so five years together." I smile at him. "That's amazing. I'm happy for you. What does your gang do?"

"We mostly work with drugs. I don't use them, but it's how I make money. Jesse does the same, also some killing. Same with me. But Vic is the one who does drug dealing, prostitution, killings, but only because he's in Mexico. But as people, we're not bad. I know you know Jesse isn't." I nod at him. Jesse wasn't ever cruel with me. And Vic did prostitution? "Wait - did you say Vic did prostitution?" He nods and I feel bile rising in my throat. Prostitution, that was the worse thing someone could go through. And Vic was encouraging it. "Oh, God. Are you okay," he asks me. Are you okay is right.

I shake my head and then I run to the bathroom. I hurl into the toilet bowl, not really caring if I missed. I hear the others run in the bathroom and I finally stop, so I had time to look at them. But then I felt the bile rising again and I was hacking into the toilet again. Ugh. Eventually, all the contents from my stomach were gone and all I was doing was dry-heaving.

When it finally stopped, Jesse stepped up with a cloth to wash my face and Vic came up and helped me stand. But as soon as he let go, my knees gave out and I was tumbling down again. "Ow," I murmur, pouting. I hear Austin chuckle. "Oh, my God, Kellin. You are so adorable! If Alan were here, he'd so fangirl over how cute you are." I blush as Austin said that, and look down. From the corner of my eye, I see Vic glaring at Austin and Austin smirks, knowing full well why Vic was doing it.

Vic helps me stand again, picking me up bridal style. We all walk out - well I was carried - and back into the living room. Vic sets me on the couch, gently. Jesse takes a seat on one side of me, Vic on the other. Austin just stood, smirking. I smile at him. "So," I say, trailing off. "Kell's staying," Jesse snaps.

"No. Kellin is mine," Vic says and I sigh. I get up, and wobble over to Austin, my legs shaky. He catches me before I fall. "Tired of all the arguing," he asks me and I nod, sadly. "I'd ask to go with you, but I don't want to get you in trouble with Vic and Jesse." He nods, sadly. "Yeah, it'd be fun to have you around. But I can't afford a war with Vic. But, hey, doesn't mean we can't keep in contact. What's you phone number?"

I stare at him, wide-eyed. "Oh, um, I don't have a phone," and he gapes. "What? How old are you?"

"Twenty-two."

"You're twenty-two and you don't have a phone?!" I nod my head. He smacks his forehead. "Wow. How did you communicate with your friends?"

"I didn't have friends. I was bullied."

"Oh," he frowns. "Hey, it's fine. It's in the past anyway."

"Ok. So, you're going with Vic?" I nod my head, sadly. "If it means protecting Jesse, yes. How big is Vic's gang, anyway?"

"Huge. Bigger than all gang's combined. He has more than one head quarters all over Mexico." I sigh, yeah, I was going with Vic. We turn back to look at Jesse and Vic and see them still arguing. I groan. "Ok! I have had enough of this shit!" They turn to look at me. "Jesse, I'm going with Vic, but not because I like him, because I don't. But to protect your gang," I say, shouting in Jesse's direction.

Then I turn to look at Vic, seeing him glaring at me. "Oh, at least be happy I'm going with you," I snap at him. "And if I go with you, I want to be able to call Jesse everyday. And Austin, as well. And Jesse visits whenever he can." He glares at me harder, and stands up quicker than I can talk. "No."

"Yes. Or I can just stay here with Jesse, I don't care. At least, I like Jesse." And he looked hurt for a moment before masking it with anger, "Fine. You can Jesse everyday, and talk to Austin, and Jesse can visit." I smile, "Glad that's cleared out." I walk back into Jack's room and see him just now waking up.

"How are you feeling," I ask him, taking a seat beside him on the bed. "I've been better. My head's killing me." I get up and grab him a glass of water from the drawer, along with a pill. "Here, this should help you with the pain," I say, taking a seat before handing him the pill. He sticks it in his mouth, and I bring the cup to his lips, letting him swallow the pill with water. "Thank you," he says, pulling his lips away from the cup. I smile, "It's no problem."

After a while of just sitting, I see his face converting to one of pain. "What's wrong," I ask him, frantically. "Nothing, it's just my abdomen area. I got kicked there pretty hard," and I frown as I hear that. "Stupid Jesse, he's lucky I love him or I would have kneed him in the balls," I mumble, uncovering Jack. He flinched a bit at being moved around and kept mumbling apologies, wincing with him.

Finally I got the blanket off him and I raised his shirt a bit to get a look at his stomach. I frown at what I see, it was badly bruised. "I'm going to have to feel for broken bones, but it will hurt, okay?" I wait for him to nod before running the tip of my fingers over a bruise. I pull my hand back before placing it flat against his skin. I run over his abdomen and a bit on his sides. I felt him quiver a bit.

I pull my hand back, "Well, you don't have any broken bones, so they're probably bruised which means, no rough-housing. And you might want to apply ice on those bruises. It helps. Let's see what else... Oh, yes. Try to rest until the bruises fade, your ribs should be better by then, if not, I recommend a doctor," I say.

"You're really good at this," he commented. "Yeah, well, when it happens a lot, you tend to learn how to take care of yourself." He sends me a sympathetic look. I smile. "Ok. Now try to not make Jesse want to kill you this time," I say, jokingly and he laughs before wincing. "Sorry," I murmur. He smiles, "It's fine."

"I'll see if Jesse will let you stay here, even with me gone," I say, getting up. He reaches for my wrist and grabs it, "You're leaving?"

"Yeah, I have to go with Vic." He frowns, but let's go of me and I as I walk to the door, I bump into a firm chest. I feel the arms wrap around my waist and lift me up. Before I knew, I was on someone's shoulder. I look around and see Jesse glaring, and I thought I was Vic's shoulder, but then I see Vic practically seething, so I realized I was on Austin's shoulder. I smile a bit as I get carried out of the room and up the stairs.

"Which one is your room," Austin asked me.

"I slept with Jesse, do you know which is his room?" He nods and walks to the door and opens it. "Hey, Jesse. Can Jack stay until he feels better," I ask, giving him my puppy-dog eyes. He grumbles, but nods. "Yay, thanks."

"Where's your stuff," Vic asks and I answer him, Austin carrying me over there. He and Vic both grab my shirts and shorts, socks, and underwear. "My jeans are in the closet and my TOMs are at the front door," I say, and they both walk to the closet. Austin still hasn't dropped me and Vic sent him glares every once and a while. I look to Jesse and he looked so heartbroken to see me go. "Hey, Austin, can you put me down," I whisper in his ear and he nods.

I walk to Jesse when he does and hug him close. He hoists me up and I wrap my legs around him. "I'll miss you," I tell him. He smiles sadly, "I know, I'll miss you too."

"I can't believe you're the leader of a gang," I tell him, resting my head on his shoulder. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you, I just didn't want to put you in any danger." I nod against him. "I understand."

"I just can't believe you're going with Vic," he growls.

"I don't want to go, but if it means keeping you safe, I'd do anything. You've done so much for me, I just felt like I needed to repay the debt. But at least this time we can talk everyday."

He chuckles at that, "Yeah. Vic isn't that much of a dick. He's just really jealous and possessive. Like right now, he looks like he wants to kill me and have his wicked way with you. Don't you, Vic," he asks louder. I see Vic's jaw set. And I blush, before burying my head into Jesse's chest. I stay in Jesse's arms until they finish packing my stuff. It wasn't much, but what I did have, they packed it.

I was leaving Jesse again, and this time, on my own accord. Vic was waiting for me at the front door. Jesse had carried me down the stairs and Austin had my bag. Jesse had handed me my notebook and I had clutched between Jesse and I. When we reach the front door, I climb off Jesse and put on my shoes.

"Bye, JLaw," I call out to Jesse. "Don't forget to call!"

"I won't! Bye, Austin!"

"Bye, Kellin! Try to talk to me if Vic let's you!"

"Ok!" I yell, as I climb into Vic's car. He had placed my bag in the backseat. He climbed in after me and as soon as he started driving, I realized the seriousness of the situation. I was in deep trouble when we got to Mexico. What would he do to me? Would he rape me? Oh, God, no. I start thinking of worst case scenarios. Shit, shit, shit.

"So, I had no idea that JLaw was your Jesse," Vic says. I snap my gaze to him. "Yeah, I had no idea that Jesse was your JLaw," I mutter, bitterly. "You're upset. Why?"

"Because he kept this from me. We have been friend since kindergarten and he didn't tell me this. Meanwhile, I told him every from my ab-" I cut myself off. "About my past, secrets, dreams. I even sing for him everytime I finish a song I wrote. I never kept anything from him, but he kept this from me. That's why I'm upset."

"I wouldn't keep anything from you," he says, and my eyes widen. "What?"

"I wouldn't keep anything from you. From the beginning, I have been nothing but honest with you." I look away, I knew where this was going. "Can I turn on the radio?" He nods, sighing. I pick a random station, not really caring what song was playing. I just needed something to avoid that conversation.

"Vic, are you mad?" There was a pause and I was petrified to hear the answer. I bite my lip in anticipation. "Honestly, I was. I kind of trashed my study and got drunk. I had swore that when I found you, you'd get a hell of a punishment... but seeing with you Jesse, even if it killed me, because you kill me in a good way sometimes. But anyway, seeing you with Jesse, I saw that you were genuinely happy. And I realized you only ran to be happy, and if anyone deserves it, it's you." He stops and I think he's done, but he opens his mouth again.

"I may not know your whole past, but I do know someone hurt you and that Jesse was there." I smile and nod. Maybe Vic isn't all that bad. "You know, Vic. I was wrong about you. When you're not being a possessive, over protective, jealous prick, you're not so bad." He chuckles at that. "Thank you, Kellin." I nod and lean against my head against the window. And finally I fall asleep.

~~~

Vic

I was on my way to America to meet with JLaw and Aussie with Jack from JLaw's gang, Sleeping with Sirens. We were about to land and Jack told me that JLaw had rented us a car to drive to his house. We meet up with Aussie along the way and we all drive to JLaw's house. When we reach his house, I ring the doorbell and I shuffling from the other side before JLaw opens up.

We had stayed in the living room for a while, getting some of our business done. Like JLaw said he needed extra cocaine to sell to his customers for more money, he didn't explain why he needed more. Better to remain unknowing. I nodded and wrote that down. Then Aussie said he was going to gain new members from California and we nodded, giving him the okay.

One's gang can't be too big or else that equals to much power. I am aloud to have a big gang because I have proven to them that I will not claim war on them unless they force my hand. We were all honest men, even if we do what we do. I didn't really need anything. We just did this to keep up with each other.

Then out of nowhere I hear a voice call out, "Jesse." I turn to see who had done that and I feel my jaw drop. I see him jump into JLaw's arms and wrap his legs around JLaw's waist. Hell no. JLaw had his arms around him and was smiling at him. "Jesse, I finished Someone Else!" What the hell was Someone Else. But JLaw knew what it was sine he smiled and said, "That's great. I want to hear it later, okay? After the meeting." Kellin nodded and jumped off Jesse before running back upstairs.

"Sorry, guys. He's just excited that he finished a song he worked so hard to finish."

"It's fine. He's kind of adorable anyway," I feel my blood boil hearing Aussie say that. All I saw was red after seeing how Kellin hugged Jesse and they held each other. I was jealous because he never did that with me. He seemed repulsed by my touch, but he welcomed JLaw's. I can't believe that his Jesse was JLaw.

"Come on," he says, leading us to the basement where we always meet. "Ok, so business meeting beginning now," Aussie says and we get down to who's giving what and getting what. Who we need to kill, new members. That lasted about two hours. But I couldn't get Kellin off my mind. He was here, but I was taken out of my thought because then out of nowhere, two silhouettes jump out and attack Jack. Aussie and I jump out of reach, but JLaw walks to them.

"Beat him bad, and then I'll kill him," he commands, before walking back to us. We didn't ask why, we stayed out of each other's business. It was better that way because if we were to get into a gang fight, he could say we used him for information, so better to remain oblivious when it comes to others' business.

We just stood back and talked, sometimes watching what was happening and from what I could tell, they getting him good. Poor guy, wonder what he did to get JLaw so mad. He was usually the calmest. Never ever really had a reason to get mad, considering what he does for a living. This Jack person must have done something major for him to anger JLaw like this.

Eventually, JLaw stopped it and pulled out a gun. He had set it and was about to pull the trigger when Kellin goes and runs to stand in front of Jack. " What the hell, Jesse? What's going on," he screams at him and that was the most angry I had ever seen him. He kept yelling at JLaw and I saw that what hurt JLaw the most was when Kellin compared him to him. Whoever him was.

Then when JLaw explained to Kellin that he was the leader of Sleeping with Sirens, Kellin had this heartbroken look on his face. JLaw went to comfort him, and I was about to attack him for touching what is mine, but then Kellin said, "No. Don't touch me. I'm leaving."

"Where will you go?" JLaw asks him. "There is only one other person I know in Michigan," Kellin replies and JLaw's eyes widen. "Kellin, no. He'll rape you, beat you, hell, he'll probably kill you." I felt my eyes widen hearing that. No one was aloud to touch in that way, but me. If I find out anyone has taken advantage of him, they are going to die. No questions asked. Not even if Kellin himself wanted it.

"I don't care," Kellin replies. "At least, he never lied to me! And I rather spent my life getting beaten than being lied to." With that, Kellin grabs Jack and leads him upstairs. Jack is going to get an even worse beating from me. Why did Kellin have to have such a big and caring heart? And also, how has Kellin not seen me yet? Because nothing else matters than his precious Jesse.

We all follow JLaw upstairs. We see how Kellin starts treating Jack and I was seriously considering sending my men after Jack for how Kellin was touching him. But voted against it since Kellin would probably hate me more than he already does. But... it didn't matter, I could live with Kellin hating me as long as it meant he wouldn't be touching any other person, guy or girl. Why did he have to be so gentle with him?

Although I guess I should thank Jack since he didn't pick up Kellin. If he had picked up Kellin, I probably would have never met him. So I guess I won't beat up Jack, just dream of his demise. I see Kellin help Jack get to a room and whe he comes back out, he's glaring at JLaw. "What did you do to him?"

"I told Justin and Gabe to beat him and that I would kill him." Kellin looked like he was in pain at hearing those words and his hand clenched around his shirt, he probably didn't notice. He looked like he was about to say something, but then he saw me and I saw genuine fear in his eyes. "Jesse," he tried.

"No, Kellin, I won't let you scold me on how I shouldn't kill him for what he let happen to you - " JLaw begins, but Kellin cut him off. "Jesse," he tried again, but JLaw wouldn't listen to him. "Let me talk, Kellin - " but this time, to cut him off, Kellin ran into his arm. I let out a low growl at  JLaw for touching what is mine. But I think he finally noticed something was wrong with Kellin because he asked, "Kellin, what's wrong?"

"It's him," Kellin whispers, it was hard to catch. "It's the stupid gang leader," he says, and I scoff. Stupid? "Who is it? Because there are like two gangs here."

"V-Vic," he stutters and that's so cute. But Jesse whirls around to face me. I saw nothing but rage on his face and that made me smile. "You were the one who took Kellin?" I nod, smirking. "Yeah, he stepped into my lands. You're lucky I didn't kill him. That's what I do with everyone who does." I see Kellin flinch at hearing my voice and that hurt, but I kept my cool. "He's mine and I want him back," I say.

"Like hell," Jesse yells, and hugs Kellin tighter. He buries his head deeper into JLaw's neck, I see him shivering harder than I've ever sen anyone do before. "Yes. And if you don't, I will call war on you." And I see JLaw tense up. I see Kellin whisper something in JLaw's ear. Then I see JLaw do the same to Kellin.

Then I see Kellin turn around in JLaw's grasp and he faces me. His pretty little mouth opens up and he says the best news I have ever heard in my life, "I'll go with you."

~~~

Kellin

I feel someone shaking me awake and I start panicking when I see it's Vic. I push his hand away and start quivering in fear. "Woah, Kellin. Calm down," he says, gently. I look at him and when I see the airport, I remember. I came with him to protect Jesse's gang. When he sees I'm calm, he nods and we climb off the car. He grabs my bag and I grab my notebook.

He pays for our flight and we go through the whole process of getting on a plane. When it was time to board, Vic grabs my bag again and we find our seats. He places my bag on the drawer over us and takes the window seat. Thank goodness, I do not want to stare at the ground and see how high we are, I'd probably vomit again.

But the flight was fine, and when we get to Mexico, he had a car awaiting us and the driver was Mike. Great, note the sarcasm. "Hey, Vic. How was the - Kellin?" I stare at him blankly. I still haven't forgiven him for what he did to me. "How did you find me?"

"I'll explain everything at home, so for now, let's go." Mike nods at Vic and we get in the car. Mike starts driving and I finally see where to go to get to Head Quarters. It was nice route, full of trees and animals. But then you get to the clearing and that's where it is. Mike opens the gate and then drives forward. He parks the car in a giant garage full of other cars.

We get out of the car and walk to the house. Vic carries my bag upstairs and into his room. "You're still sleeping with me, nothing has changed there." I nod, sadly. "Good, now put your things away while I explain everything to Mike," and he walks out of the room. While putting my things away, I let out a few tears. But I wasn't all that upset because doing this was protecting Jesse.

When I finish, I walk back downstairs and see Mike and Vic are done talking. Mike was walking out the door and Vic turns to look at me. He walks towards me and when he's a breath away, he grabs my head and slams our lips together. I pull away and stare at him, repulsed. He starts walking closer and I take steps back. But then my back hits the wall. I look at him in fear.

He brings his lips to mine again and I turn my head the other way. "Please stop, Vic." He doesn't, he attacks my neck and brings his hand under my shirt. I try escaping, but his other hand, he had taken a hold of my body and pulled me flush against him. I felt more tears coming, "Vic, please stop." But he doesn't, his hand went higher and so did my shirt, my whole skinny torso was exposed.

"I love your skin, Kellin. It's so soft and pale. Like a porcelain doll. You have the looks anyway. Pretty, so pretty. Attractive in a delicate way, it's what you are," he says, bring the hand wrapped around me to my leg. Why did I decide to wear shorts? When he's done there, he brings his hand to my shoulder and slides the sleeve of my tank top off, exposing the skin there. His nose traces the shape and he inhales my scent.

"You're very pretty, Kellin," I didn't reply, I just stood there crying, waiting for it to be all over. He placed butterfly kisses all over my exposed shoulder before moving to the other one. He does the same thing to this shoulder. He also skimmed a hand over my exposed waist. When he's done with my shoulder, he pecks my lips before pulling back. And I fall to the ground in tears.

"New rules," he says, not even helping me get up. I shakily get up and pull my sleeves up and my shirt down. My whole body was trembling and I almost fell back down, but I used the wall for support. "Rule Number One: You will call JLaw at five o'clock everyday, not before that.
Rule Number Two: You're aloud to go out now since I trust you not to run away anymore because if you do, I call war on SWS.
Rule Number Three: You are not aloud to touch anyone, but me. You are mine, it's about time you realized it." I nod at the rules.

"Oh, and one more thing, I'm going to want sex eventually. Be ready for that," and I collapse. He walks upstairs and I sit on the floor, sobbing at that. I gasp for breath. "I-I-I," I couldn't even speak. The sobs racked my body, shaking my shoulders. I wasn't ready for this. I wish I would have stayed with Jesse.

I shakily get up. My body hasn't stopped trembling. I slowly walk out the front door and to the edge of HQ. I climb over the fence, my shaking body giving too many close calls. But I made it over, I walk towards the tree where Vic caught me. I shudder thinking of Vic, but I slide down against the trunk and I finally break down crying, not caring who heard. Not like anybody could anyway.

But after my sobs turned into silent tears, I heard rustling coming from further into the woods. I tentatively get up and walk towards it. Stupid move, I'm acting like those idiots in the horror movies, but honestly I don't care if I die. Not anymore. As I get closer, the rustling got louder and I could hear panting. I break into a run.

But what I find shocks me. I see a girl, she looks around my age, but that's not what shocked me. This girl had a baby in her hands, but the baby was a new born. "Oh, my God, are you okay," I rush to her side. "No," she gasps out. "I don't have much longer, but please take care of her," she says, handing her baby to me.

"What's your name," I ask her, taking the baby. "Katelynne," and she started panting harder. I look down and saw all the blood she lost in child birth. "Please, take care of her. Her name is," she gasps for breath, but that was her last. She closes her eyes and falls back. "No, no, no, no. Wake up, please." But she didn't. She was gone. I get up, shakily again. Today was not my day.

I hear angry cries from further into the woods and I star running. I cup my hand around the baby's head, making sure nothing hit her. When I reach the gang, I run inside, using the door's this time. When I was inside HQ, is when I finally look at the little girl in my arms. She was adorable, but covered in blood. I knew I had to get her to Vic's house.

I speed-walk there and when I see Vic isn't in the living room, I walk upstairs and burst into our room. "Vic, I found this girl in the woods and she had just had her baby. She died, but before she did, she told me to take care of her baby," I rush out and he looks at me like I'v grown another head. But then the baby starts crying, she was probably uncomfortable with all the dry blood. "Vic, get me a wet cloth," I command.

While he goes to get that, I start bouncing the baby, trying to calm her down. "It's okay, it's okay," that didn't work. I start humming a random tune and place her head over my heart. She starts calming down and that's when Vic arrived. I place her on the bed and start rubbing the wet the cloth over her face gently. She starts crying and fussing. "Oh, I know you don't like it, baby," I coo at her.

When I finish cleaning off all the blood, I pick her up and wrap her in blanket I had Vic get me. I was calming her down again. It wasn't working, so I went the singing tactic.

"What can I do?
What can I do?
To find something better to do than this.
I've been sitting around,
Thinking of everything that I've done wrong.
I've been playing it over and over in my head.
Been thinking about something that
I might have said to you to make you go to so far away.
And it makes me think of.

I try so hard
To find out where I've been.
I've been playing my cards,
But I never ever win.
And if I fall short.
Will you pick me up from this mess?
Oh, be my heaven again.
Be my heaven again.

Trying to figure out this life I live.
And everything that I'm trying to give
Cuz I see so many people just thinking about themselves
And no one else.

Is that what this life's about?
Getting what you want out of it and leaving the others out?
Cuz I don't think that's got passion or love or anything of above.
I just want to find

Somebody who knows
What it is or how it goes
Cuz I've been thinking to myself
That we can do better for ourselves in the end.
I've been dreaming out loud,
Trying to figure all this out.
Could you be my heaven again?
Could you be my heaven again?

Cuz I don't want to die alone.
I don't want to be afraid.
I don't want to sit back and think about my days
And everything that we tried;
We try so hard sometimes
Just to find out where we belong in the end.

(no go back, go back)

We'll figure out who we are.
We'll figure out who we are.
Trying to figure out who we are with a time and a place.
Trying to figure out who we are.

And it gets so hard sometimes,
Trying to figure out this whole life
And everything in between
We try so hard sometimes
But it never makes sense to us,
Maybe we can find a riddle or two
To get back to what we're supposed to do.
This love, this love,
This love."

She was asleep by the time I finished the song. It was an original, called it Heaven Again. I adjust her in my arms, making sure I'm supporting her head. I hum the song to keep her calm in sleep. "Kellin," Vic calls, softly. "You have a beautiful voice." I blush and lower my gaze, "Thank you."

"Also, if we're going to raise her, we're going to need diapers, wipes, clothes, a tub for her, formula since neither of us can feed her, baby food, and a name." I frown at him, knowing he's right. "When can we go?"

"Now, we'll her things now, but what about the name?" I bite my lip and look at her. What to name her? How will I cope with keeping her? Cope? Copeland! "I want to name her Copeland. Now let's go," I say, and walk slowly with her in my arms. We walk out and head towards the giant garage. He picks a random car, that had a booster seat.

"We have cars for every emergency, strap her in." I do as he says and get in at shot gun, putting in my seatbelt. He drives out skillfully and onto the road. The gate was open and he drives out of HQ. It took a while to finally get to the town, but we did and he found a Wal*Mart. He finds a spot close to the entrance. I go unstrap Cope and she starts getting fussy a bit, but I hum to calm her.

We walk inside and Vic grabs a cart. We go to the nursery area, grabbing diapers that said new born, wipes, bottles, passifiers, baby nail clipper, nose cleaner, formula, blankets, stuffed animals, toys, clothes,  everything. We got a lot and Vic went to pay and put them way while I looked at the cribs.

Some were way to extravagant, some too plain. This was harder than I thought it was going to be. I look down at Cope and tighten the blanket around her. But then our of nowhere, someone grabbed my wrists, tight. "Ow," I murmur. When I look up at who did it, I freeze. This man was terrifying. He was glaring at me and when I whimpered, his grip tightened. I bite my lip to keep from making a noise. "Yes, you'll make a good sex slave for me."

"Please let me go. I don't even know you. Please, I have a daughter," his grip tightens and I swear I feel the bone breaking. I whimper and almost shout out. Oh, God, Vic, where are you?! "Come with me," he says, pulling my arm. I had no choice, but to follow. But I struggled, and when I kicked him in the balls is when he let me go. I start running and I bump into someone along the way.

"Vic, thank God," I say as I pull him in for a hug with the hand not holding Cope. He embraces me back and I felt safer than with that guy. "What's wrong, Kellin?"

"Some random man grabbed me and was pulling me to the back of the store, he kind of grabbed my wrist and maybe sprained it." He pulls back, but kept one arm around me, the other went to my wrist and I whimpered when he touched it. He was glaring at the bruise forming. "Did he tell you why he wanted you?" And I bite my lip, I don't lie and I'm not good at it either. I nod. Good, that's not lying.

"Well, why did he want you?" I adjust Cope and make sure she's still asleep before answering, "Promise me you won't yell and go after this guy," I say. "Kellin."

"Promise me." He sighs, "Fine, I promise."

"He said I'd make a good sex slave for him." Vic runs off to the crib section. Shit! I run after him. "Vic!" He keeps running towards the crib section until he reaches it. That's when he slows down, but he was still searching isle after isle. "Vic, please. Let's just buy the crib and leave." He looks at me, I was begging him to let it go. "Please." He sighs and his shoulders untense. I give and sigh of relief and hug him, not to close because of Cope, but enough for him to know I appreciate it.

He pulls me closer, but not tight so Cope can still breathe. "Ok. Let's go look for the crib," he says into my shoulder. I nod and turn to walk away, but he didn't let go of me. "Give me Cope, your wrist is hurt and your arm must be tired," he says, and I nod, handing her to him. "Make sure to support her head," he nods and carries her. We walk around, looking for the perfect crib. Well, I was, Vic was just there.

But finally I see it. The crib was white and had a canopy. It wasn't too big, nor too small. "Vic, I found it. Let's get her this one." He nods and mumbles something that sounds like, "Finally." I pout and he smirks, but hands me Cope and grabs the box for the crib. I see Cope wake up and bring her to face. "Hey, Cope. How's my little girl," I ask her in a baby voice. She just squinted her eyes. "We should probably hurry," I say. "Since she just woke up, she's be hungry."

He nods and we hurry to the cashier. Vic pays for it and we're on our way to the car. But then I freeze, inside the car beside ours is that guy who attacked me. I had stopped dead in my tracks and Vic noticed, "Kellin, what's wrong?"

"Vic, it's him. The guy who grabbed my wrist," and just thinking about it made my wrist hurt a lot more than it did. "Ok. I got this," he says, and pulls me gently to the car. He puts the crib away, I strap Copeland in. Then I get in my seat. I looked at the man and he smirked, but then Vic stepped in front of the window, blocking him from view.

I see him tap on the guy's window. When the guy rolled it down, Vic punched him. "Hey! ¡Oralé, waye!"

"Never touch what is mine again, understood?" The guy nodded, grudgedly. Vic nods and gets inside. On the way back to the gang, I grab Vic's hand. He looks at me, eye-brow raised. "Thank you," I say and peck his cheek. If he were always that sweet with me then maybe I would fall for him. "Really?"

"What," I ask. "You said that if I were always that sweet with you then maybe you'd fall for me. Did you mean it?" I blush, Oops, I had said that out loud. No point lying. "Well, yes. Who wouldn't fall for a sweet guy?" He does this thing that is between a smile and smirk and I feel my blush darken.

We reach the gang hideout and instead of parking at the garage, he parked in front of his house. I grab Cope and Vic grabs this little chair for her where we can strap her in while we empty the car. He places the chair in the living room and I put her a diaper and a little onesie before placing her in the chair, making sure to strap her in.

I go back out and grab bags full of her stuff and place them in the living room. Vic does the same and we do this until everything is down. We had taken everything upstairs, even Cope and her chair. While Vic was setting up the crib, I was putting everything away. When I finished, I went downstairs and made Cope her bottle. Then I stick in the microwave, making sure it's warm enough for her.

When I walk back upstairs, bottle in hand, I unstrap Cope and start feeding her. I knew she wouldn't be able to hold it herself yet. I sit on the bed and tilt her back a bit and let her drink. Meanwhile, Vic was making so much noise, but at least he was almost done. I probably would have burnt everything. I hum Heaven Again to her and she seems to enjoy it. And I hum until she finishes the whole bottle and until she's asleep before placing her in her newly built crib. Vic had placed it right beside our bed so we could reach her in case of an emergency.

After laying her down, I yawn. It was pretty late. "Come on, time for bed," Vic says, handing me the same shirt I wore the last time I was here. He turns around before I ask him to. And when I see he was changing as well, I turn around also, blushing. "You can look now," he says, and my blush darkens when I see he's in nothing but his boxers. I peck Cope's forehead before getting into bed with Vic and falling asleep.