Your Guardian Angel

I curled up guiltily next to the door. "Andy.. Andy, please. I'm
sorry. You know that I wouldn't ever invade your privacy like that. I
swear. You know I wouldn't. It fell open like that, I didn't read it
intentionally.." I begged through the door. "I'm sorry.."
"Go away! I thought I could trust you!" he screamed, voice destroyed.
"You can! I swear, you can trust me!" I called back. It was falling
apart. I was losing him.. I was losing him and it was my fault.
"No I can't! You r-read my thoughts! I can't trust you!" he cried. "Go
away! I hate you!"
The words were a knife in the heart. He.. He hated me. He meant those
words. "Please.. I'm sorry.." I said again, putting one hand on the
door. "I'm not going to leave you. I'm going to sit outside here until
you forgive me." A loud thump near my ear meant he threw something
heavy at the door. "Andy, please.. I know how you are about your
journal. I would never ever do anything to hurt you. You know that..
Please.. Please believe me..." I curled up, listening to him. My
heart ached for him.
"Ashley, go away! I hate you! How could you do this to me?" he screamed.
I was growing desperate. "I just wanted to look at the feather, the
book fell open. That's all. I didn't mean to.."
"B-but you read it!" he whimpered. I leaned my head against the wall.
"I did. I did and I'm sorry."
He fell silent after that. I did the same, slouched down as I waited. I closed my eyes, straining my ears to hear him.
CC peeked in, gesturing me over. "You read his journal?" he frowned. "You of all people, Ash.."
I sighed gustily. "Did you come in here just to yell at me or..?"
"No. I didn't. I came in here to tell you that you need to tell him about your weird angel thing."
I forgot I hadn't really explained any of this to CC. "Uh- guardian. Guardian angel." I corrected. He plucked the black feather from Andy's notebook. He swished his hand to the space my wings would occupy if they were physical. "So- uh- Where are they?"
I sighed. "They're only tangible if I choose them to be." I placed his hand on the spot they sprouted from. "See? Normal people anatomy."

He nodded slowly swishing his hands around again. "Okay. So you have to choose to show them?"
I nodded again. "Yup. It's that easy." I said sarcastically. I never ever wanted to have this conversation with anybody.
He blinked, contemplating his next words. "So you're a guardian angel, correct?" he waited for a nod before continuing. "You're his, aren't you?" He jabbed his thumb towards the door concealing Andy.
"I was." I said sadly. "Meaning, not anymore."
He put both his hands on my forearms. "Ash.. you need to tell him.. He's convinced you're hiding things from him. Then you read his diary. This thing is driving you apart."
I rubbed my eyes, sighing. "I know I should. But I can't. He just- I don't think he'd see it the way I do?" My voice raised into a questioning tone. The door opened and Andy stomped out, grabbing his cigarettes and his journal, looking at me with stormy, dark blue eyes. He stomped outside, a hiccuping sob in his wake.
"What did you read?" CC asked quietly.
"He can't sleep without thinking about me. He wants me to care and worry and protect him. He thinks it's weird that I know so much." I summarized.
"So you read about his feelings for you, brushed it off like nothing, and now he's pissed. Am I right?" CC peaked his fingers. "I see why he's upset."
I sighed. "Please elaborate, because I don't." I pressed my fingertips into my eyes, setting off a fireworks show behind my eyelids.
"You really are unobservant." CC said, groaning. "Ash, I really mean what I'm about to say. You need to tell him before you lose him forever."

I stayed quiet. Was that a possibility? Could I really lose him forever? I don't think I could bear living without him...
CC got up, frustrated with my silence. "I'm gonna go talk to him. You think until you know how to fix this. Ash.. You tell him or I do. And he doesn't want to hear it from me."
How could I fix this? Andy and I had never even fought before. I'd never raised my voice to him until recently, the same for him. Now everything was falling apart. CC was right. It was my fault. All of it was my fault. The fact I was even here was my fault. I should've kept emotion out of it. But I didn't. I let my emotions interfere and now I'm here screwing everything up.
I did something unforgivable, but it gave me Andy. I did something else and now I was at risk to lose him forever.
I needed to do something to show how sorry I was.. and fast, before CC spilled. I ran outside after CC. "Andy.. please. Can we talk..?" I pleaded.
Andy sniffled. "No. I don't want to talk to you, much less see you right now." He looked away, but not before I saw his red rimmed, puffy blue eyes. He was hurt.. Because of me, he was hurting.
I stepped closer, tossing his cigarette to smolder against the cement, taking both his hands in mine. "Andy, please. I'm so, so sorry. I didn't mean to. Forgive me.. Please..."
Andy breathed shakily. "I don't think you understand how much you hurt me. You read my private thoughts. That- that's inexcusable..."
"I know. Andy, sweetie, I know. It's a terrible, horrible thing I did. I'm sorry. You know I would never ever do anything to hurt you." I promised. "I spend too much time worrying about you to turn around and intentionally hurt you." I laughed lightly. "I won't touch your journal without permission ever again. Cross my heart." I smiled.
He gave me a shaky smile in return. "I trust you.." He whispered, voice wrecked by his earlier rage.
"Come inside, sweetie. I'll make you some tea or something for your voice." I led him back inside, He followed, curling up on the couch. Tears still dripped from his ocean eyes, despite the post-tantrum puffiness slowly leaving his pale skin. I made him a cup of green tea, pressing it into his hands.
"Thanks, Ash." he smiled gratefully. "You're my angel." he giggled, taking a sip.
I paled, heart thudding. "Your guardian angel." I agreed, brushing his hair back and sitting next to him.