The Enigma’s Anomaly

“Hey Frank, it’s Gerard, but you probably know that. You haven’t picked up your phone for a week, and it’s getting ridiculous. If you hate me than I understand that, but I need to know, otherwise you’re just leaving me hanging here. I need to know because you’ve got me hoping and that’s making me miserable. I guess I just miss you. Mikey hasn’t let me leave the house since you left and I really want to see you. I’m sorry I guess. I just hate thinking that you hate me. Call me when you can.”

The message beeps when it’s done and I can’t stop looking at the phone. I want to call him, I think. I don’t know what I want actually.

It’s been a busy six days for me. I finished that article on Gerard and turned it in. It’ll be published in a week. That’s not all I’ve done though. Besides writing, I’ve been... investigating per se. I need to find out who’s trying to hurt Gerard. It’s never felt more important to me then it is now.

I broke into Mikey’s apartment when he wasn’t home. His handwriting doesn’t match the note. I also visited Gerard’s office when he was out to check the secretary’s handwriting. No match. I took a photo of the note before I burned it, but I’m not getting anywhere on this lead. I have a list of Gerard’s known contacts but the guy is even more of a hermit than I am. I’ve checked even the most obscure people, like the barista’s in his coffee shop. Found an old roommate of his. Nothing. I’m getting nowhere.

It’s Saturday now and I don’t know where I’m going with this investigation. I don’t even know if I’m going about this correctly. Maybe the guy who hired me had someone write that note for him. I don’t see that as likely though because that would mean he’d have to include more people in the transaction. When it comes to assassination it’s better to keep it as under wraps as you can. So who has enough money to kill Gerard, and who wants him dead so much that they hired two different people?

The word on the street about The Enigma is not flattering. People think I’m either dead or a sucker. It’s true that Gerard should be easy to kill, but he keeps managing to escape being killed. Three different attempts on his life is starting to seem impossible. It’s practically unheard of. I want him alive though. I want him to have a chance at finding someone worthy of him and I’m willing to put myself in danger to make sure he gets that.

It starts raining in the afternoon and it doesn’t let up for the rest of the day. It actually starts getting harder and I already know that my neighbors upstairs are going to have a leak which means I’ll probably have a leak too. The floors aren’t as insulated as they could be, so I’m used to it.

I’m not really doing much of anything until my phone rings so I groan then look down at it. It’s the number I now know to be Mikey’s so I decide I’d better answer it.

“Gerard’s been shot,” Mikey says as soon as I pick up.

“What?” I feel like my whole body just stopped working. If he’s not okay then it’ll kill me. I need him to be okay.

“He got shot again when he was sneaking out to go see you.”

“Are you saying this is my fault? I’m so sorry, okay! You can blame me until your lips bleed, I just need to know that he’s alive. Is he okay?”

“He’s fine, it’s fine. He’s okay.”

“Oh thank god. How did they miss again?” I ask. Four times with no success? Either Gerard is a lot luckier than he looks or something else happened.

Mikey answers plainly, “They didn’t miss. He was hit dead on.”

“What? How is he okay?”

“I acquired a bulletproof vest, and it did it’s work.”

“Oh my god,” I say and I bury my face in my hands. I don’t even have words. I can’t stand this constant horror that Gerard isn’t going to see the next day. Mikey’s saved his life more times accidentally than I have by ending the contract purposefully.

“I’m... I,” I can’t find the right words for what I’m trying to say, “I’ll be over in a few minutes, just hold on.”

“Good.”

I hang up a minute later, and without thinking I’m out the door. For some reason seeing Gerard seems so much more important than my own problems right now. I guess I’m selfish but I like seeing him.

Given the rain, and the fact that New York shuts down when it so much as drizzles, it takes me well over an hour to get to Gerard’s place. Eventually I give up on getting anywhere in a cab though. It took me ten minutes to even get one, but with the stand still of traffic, it’s quicker just to walk. By the time I get there I look like I just took a shower with my clothes on.

“Did you notice that you’re wet?” Mikey asks as soon as he opens the door.

“How did I ever go through life without someone like you Mikey? Am I wet? Really? How’d you ever figure that one out?” I ask sarcastically. It doesn’t take much for my words to sound angry, but Mikey just shrugs and stands back to let me in.

“Where is he?” I ask as soon as the door closes behind me.

Due to the back of the couch being in my way I can’t tell that he’s laying down there until Gerard raises his hand and starts waving.

“I’m here, don’t worry!” Gerard’s voice calls and he sounds weird.

“How bad is it?” I ask Mikey.

He shrugs, “best it could’ve possible been. He’s got a bitch of a bruise, but he’s alive and that’s what counts.”

“What happened exactly?” I ask him.

“Gerard snuck out while I was making dinner, and when I saw that he was gone I figured he was trying to go see you,” Mikey starts, “But I don’t know where you live so I was just going to check and see that Gerard hadn’t gone too far or anything, so I ran out of the building and a bunch of people were crowding over him just outside the entrance to the building.”

“So he’s okay then?” I ask Mikey.

“I’m fantastic Frankie! I very nearly broke a rib, or so they say,” Gerard says before he starts giggling. I have no idea why he’s laughing, but it is fucking weird given the circumstances. Gerard never gave me the impression that he wasn’t weird, but still, there’s a time and a place.

“Is he high?” I ask incredulously.

“Yeah,” Mikey says nodding, and then looks at me.

He must have realized how that sounds because he quickly clarifies, “No, I mean. Yeah, he’s high, kinda. The bullet blew him back and he hit his head on the sidewalk. He’ll be fine, but he had a monster of a headache so the doctor gave him some pain relievers that make him kind of loopy.”

“How on earth did he survive if he hit his head? Why didn’t the person just fire twice?” I ask. That’s so sloppy, I would never do that. I would never just let a person go because they hit their head.

“Probably thought he was dead. He looked like it when I found him. Plus it was dark and it’s raining,” Mikey shrugs. “I’m not one to look a gift horse in the mouth.”

I nod and wait until I get a better handle of my breathing. I pace over to Gerard on the couch who’s lying there looking like he just ate an entire batch of pot brownies.

He’s sitting there with one hand under his head in a relaxed position and he’s studying the fingers of his other hand like it’s the most fascinating thing he’s ever seen. He looks like he’s never been more interested in anything more than his own fingers in his life. He’s also humming something that sounds chillingly like ‘Teenage Dirtbag.’

“Are you here to arrest me?” Gerard asks as soon as he sees me lean over the back of the couch.

“Why would I arrest you?”

“Because I stole a Jolly Rancher from Walmart once,” he answers looking dead serious.

He grabs my shirt collar and pulls me closer to him to whisper something in my ear, “Don’t tell Mikey.”

I’ve been around high people before, and I’ve been a high person myself in my life, but Gerard is the most amusing person I’ve ever seen. At one point in the next few hours he tries to play tic tac toe with himself, and he keeps booping my nose.

He also confesses his undying love for me a few times, but I shrug it off because of the amount of praise he also bestows on Scooby Doo. The way he starts talking about that dog though makes it seem like he’s ready to propose to the cartoon.

I sit on the table in front of the couch waiting for him to fall asleep. Sooner or later he’s bound to get tired, or the drugs will wear out or something but nope.

Mikey turned in almost two hours ago and it’s three in the morning by the time Gerard finally wears down. Every time I’d tried to get him to stand up and go to his bedroom he refused and turned himself into an anchor.

He falls asleep rather quickly. He just sort of collapses out of nowhere and starts lightly snoring. I have to admit it’s pretty cute, but he looks kind of uncomfortable being splayed across the couch like that.

I try to get him up and into bed, but the instant I try to he starts whining in his sleep and I don’t have the heart to wake him up. He’s just so harmless and innocent lying there without a care, so I decide not to bother him.

If it wasn’t so late I’d probably just get a cab home, but I’m so tired that I’m practically falling asleep where I stand. I make myself comfortable on the loveseat and drift aimlessly into sleep.