The Enigma’s Anomaly

“You’re brother fucking snores,” I say sometime past midnight. “I hate him.”

“Do you want me to drive over a bump or something?” Gerard asks and he glances at me with complete seriousness.

“You would do that for me?” I ask grinning.

“Anything for you,” he winks gratuitously, “but I also kind of want to piss Mikey off.”

I’m getting really sick of all this driving though. It’s taking us about twice as long to get there because of this thing called ‘heat running’ where you take a bunch of weird turns and never move in a straight line. It’s to prevent being followed, but there hasn’t been a single car behind us in miles so I don’t even see the point anymore.

We’re driving through a generic small town by the highway when Gerard finds a decent sized speed bump to wake Mikey up.

“Ahshit!” Mikey says being jolted awake. He looks at me staring at him and then at Gerard who’s glancing at him from the mirror.

“You did that on purpose, you asshole!”

“You snore,” I tell him assertively, like it’s his fault. He can’t really control his nasal passage ways anymore then the next guy, but it’s fun to see him look so irritated.

“And you are a dick,” Mikey says rubbing at his eyes.

“I am not a dick,” I say to him and turn back in my seat to look at the road in front of us which is bland interstate, “I have a dick, but that does not make me one.”

Mikey scoffs and then sets his head against the window looking ready to go back to sleep. I do not want to put up with another three hours of him snoring though. This trip is taking forever, and I don’t want to have to worry about snoring.

“No way are you falling asleep again, Mikey!” I warn him.

“Fucking watch me,” he says grumpily and he closes his eyes and puts his head against the hard window.

“So Gerard what is the loudest CD you brought with you?” I say, making sure that Mikey can hear.

“Fine! I’ll stay awake, I won’t snore. I hate you both.”

“What did I do?” Gerard asks defensively.

“You brought him!”

“He got shot!” Gerard yells back, and I feel so out of the loop not knowing what it’s like having a brother. I mean, I get that they’re playing with each other, but it’s scary how convincing it is that they’re mad at each other. I guess that’s just something you never learn when you’re an only child, but it’s still kind of weird. I actually like the new color in Gerard though, because it adds dimensions to him.

“That’s not my fault,” Mikey replies.

“He saved your life,” Gerard says.

“That’s debatable, I might have gotten out of jail for another reason if he hadn’t helped.”

Gerard squints at him, “like what? Because the way I remember it is that the evidence was overwhelmingly stacked against you or have I gotten my facts jumbled up?”

“Well we’ll never know, will we?” Mikey says.

“Yeah, because Frank saved your life.”

“But that doesn’t mean I want to go on a road trip with him.”

“He can hear you,” Gerard says giving me a look like he can’t believe he’s related to Mikey.

The fake argument ends with Mikey flipping Gerard off and Gerard telling me to flip Mikey off for him because he’s driving. He could easily do it himself, but I think he just wants to push Mikey’s buttons a little bit.

About ten minutes later a bored sounding chorus of “are we there yet” starts from the backseat and doesn’t let up for a few hours. After it gets to a point where I’m likely to actually murder him I just start throwing things. Mikey tries to throw them back at me, but soon realizes that he can’t do that without distracting Gerard. Despite his tenacious nature, not even Mikey wants us to plow into a tree because Gerard isn’t looking where he’s going.

I fall asleep, but I don’t feel as bad about it as I would if the circumstances were different. I’m on, like, twelve different painkillers at the moment because every joint inside of me has rusted and my upper body especially feels like... well, it feels like I was shot in the chest.

I blearily hear a few snippets of conversation as I’m lulling back and forth through awake and unconscious.

“Oh so he’s allowed to sleep?” Mikey’s voice questions.

“What part of getting shot isn’t computing for you?”

“You just like watching him sleep, you pervert.”

Then I really do fall asleep and my dreams are the strange kind you can only get when you’re high or if you fell asleep while watching Adventure Time. Basically the painkillers just throw me on a whacked up acid trip.

“No I don’t want to wake him up, he’s so cute,” Gerard’s voice creeps into my fantasy about dancing grapefruits.

“I knew you were a pervert. Voyeuristic pervert, with a drool fetish,” Mikey replies.

“I- he is not drooling!”

“So you don’t deny that you’re a perv?” Mikey says with victory in his voice.

“I’m not!” Gerard answers, “shut up asshat.”

“I may be an asshat, but at least I don’t get off by watching people sleep.”

“I fucking hate you.”

Mikey’s voice responds cheerily, “I know.”

~*~*~*~

“Frank?” Gerard’s voice says, “Frankie, come on.”

I groan and try to push him away, but as soon as I move I realize how uncomfortable I am. My head is between the seat and the door which is squeezing painfully against both, and my limbs are all hanging in awkward directions.

“Frank, I wouldn’t wake you, but we’re here. I just thought you’d be more comfortable in a horizontal position.”

I don’t open my eyes and try to get comfy, but it’s not going to work, “that sounds like a come on, Gerard. Are you trying to seduce me?”

I actually hear Gerard turn red. Like, I don’t even need to open my eyes to know that he’s covered in blush.

“F-frank, just get up. We’re not going to do any unpacking or anything yet, I just want to get inside and go to bed. Mikey’s already gone in, you just have to come on and get up.”

I frown, but finally push myself up and blink my eyes open with an unruly yawn. My eyes open to see that the sky is still dark, and I can’t really tell much about where we are.

“W’time is it?” I ask.

“Just past four in the morning,” Gerard says and I hear the door open. My eyes refuse to stay open so I almost fall out of the car when my door opens.

“Shit, sorry. I didn’t mean to... you okay?” Gerard rambles.

“Fine. Didn’t even fall,” I say and I rotate my legs then put my hands on the seat to help myself get up. I don’t like the way that my whole body feels so stiff, especially my arm, so I groan on the way up.

“You don’t sound fine. Do you need to take some more pain meds or something?”

“That might not be a bad idea, actually,” I say. There’s about a four weeks supply of the painkillers, and I can fill the prescription again at any drug store, but they said I should feel better within a few months. Going to have the scar on my chest forever though.

“Yeah, hold on, I’ve got to find it,” Gerard says. He closes the door behind me then leaves me leaning against it while he looks around in the back of the car. I’m surprised at how much we were able to cram in the trunk, but it’s a few suitcases at least. We left out some necessities and Gerard’s reasoning as that we’d just buy some in the nearest town.

He comes back with a small orange bottle, but I don’t have any water to get the pills down so I just hold the little bottle and look at it solemnly.

“Sorry, come on, Frank let’s get inside, I’ll get you a glass of water,” Gerard says and starts tugging me towards an actual house. It’s a real life house, not an apartment which is kind of refreshing after the number of years I’ve lived in New York.

The house definitely has two stories and possibly a basement, with an aging grass lawn out in front of it. The grass doesn’t look dry it just looks unkempt and wild. All around the front and behind us is just row after row of trees. There’s a few windows on the side of the house that we’re looking at and wood paneling along the entire thing. It’s a dark house because of the wood, but I like the way it looks. It’s huge though, way bigger then the house I grew up in, but it’s the kind of house that is probably used as more of a vacation home then an actual house. I don’t really care, I just think it’s a nice looking place.

There’s a small front porch with a yellow light that’s been turned on and it illuminates the presence of a few moths fluttering around. They’re all flying at the lamp like they’re trying to understand it, but what really catches my eye is what I see when I look up even further.

“Whoa Gerard, look at the stars,” I say, fascinated by the sky. I haven’t seen a sky that clear in such a long time that I forgot what it even looked like. Some stars are brighter than others and some of them almost seem to twinkle. It’s like they’re having a competition to see who can be the most dazzling.

Gerard’s got an arm around my waist and he turns to look at me before looking up. I see him smile, but I’m not sure if it’s more because of the stars, or because of the fact that I’m so intrigued by them.

“It’s amazing that those are all light-years away, isn’t it? Those stars have no idea what shit we go through on earth, because they just keep shining. Day after day, they stay in the sky and let off light almost like they’re trying to say hello to us, but the hello is billions of years old by the time we see it,” I say.

“You like stars, don’t you, Frankie?”

“I love them,” I tell him, and look back at him merrily, “not everything that you see is as magical or complex as a star. I get that it’s just light, or burning gas, trillions of miles away, but I think stars are so beautiful.”

“I always thought stars were fireflies that got stuck up there in that big bluish black thing,” Gerard says and I look over at him to roll my eyes, but I get caught up on how pretty he looks.

He looks tired, and in need of a shower, but he also looks fantastical. He’s almost more magical looking then the stars themselves. To be honest he probably is, because there’s so much vibrancy in him. His heart is like a firecracker and his soul is the match that keeps it burning stronger and stronger every day.

The starlight twinkles in his eyes and ignites a need to be near him inside of me. The way that hazel mixes with the light of the stars is breathtaking and makes me feel a little lightheaded.

“So pretty,” I say.

“Yeah I like the stars too,” Gerard states.

“Not the stars, silly. You. You’re the pretty one,” he looks at me disapprovingly for a minute, but I can tell that he’s trying not to smile. I love the way he’s so modest, but I don’t understand how he has room to even doubt how perfect he is. If I were that perfect, I wouldn’t need someone to tell me.

I don’t think before I just grab him and put my mouth over his, wanting to feel closer. I can’t stand how beautiful he is to me, especially right now, like this. The way his lips conform to mine and the way he knows precisely where to put his hands on my hips to make me feel the kiss in every part of my body.

If I wasn’t already fucked in love then I surely am now. He makes me tingle and I get a buzz of satisfaction whenever he’s kissing me.

It’s not like I didn’t live until he was here, I just didn’t live to the full extent. I don’t feel incomplete without Gerard, but I feel gifted to be with him.

“You electrify my life,” I say absently.

“And I promise not to let you fade away.”

I’m so overwhelmed with emotions that I don’t even know what I’m thinking. I just giggle and press into him lazily.

“Let’s get inside, okay? I think we both need some sleep.”

“Kay,” I answer and follow him, even though my bones protest unanimously.

The door is unlocked and hanging open with a mosquito net door clinging to the stilted frame. The screen is thin, but it’ll keep the bugs out. We walk into the house, closing the door behind us, and we’re instantly greeted by the warm light from a sizeable entryway. We walk further into the house and find the living room directly in front of us and to our immediate left is the kitchen which is bare aside from an empty refrigerator, an oven and the cabinets. At first I don’t think there’s even a microwave until I realize that it’s tucked away in one of the drawers.

We got a pre-furnished home, but there’s nothing here besides the basics. I actually like the way it feels though, like it’s waiting to be lived in and decorated.

The living room proves to be an amazing sight, because there’s wall to wall windows on the entire back wall that look out onto a forest. I can only describe the scenery as such because the foliage is thick, but it’s still comforting.

The TV set is minimalistic, but the couch and arm chair look cozy enough. The living room is fairly large though and takes up most of the floor other than the kitchen on the other side of the wall. Other than the two rooms the only thing on this floor is a half bathroom. There’s a set of stairs that leads upward just off the kitchen, but the basement is just a laundry room. Gerard peeks down the stairs underneath the other stairwell and says that it’s very simple, and dingy looking, so I don’t bother to look.

I grab a glass of water, chug it down along with the pill, and then we make our way up the stairs. My legs aren’t too bad it’s just my arm and shoulder which have transitioned from a stabbing feeling to a dull burning sensation.

Gerard drags one of the suitcases behind him that he shrugs off in passing to be filled with bedding. There’s not going to be anything other than just the bedframes and mattresses upstairs, but Gerard didn’t have room to pack everything, so I assume we’re going to have to buy a bedspread tomorrow. It’ll be kind of a cold night without one, but we’re all so exhausted that it shouldn’t matter.

“I don’t know why you got us a house with three rooms, Gerard. Frank certainly isn’t going to sleep in his room,” Mikey says to us as we reach the landing.

“How do you know Gerard’s not the one sleeping in my room?” I reply, and look around the floor. It’s just a straight hallway with doors on either side.

The stairs come up in the middle of the hallway where two doors are on the same side, one a bedroom and one the bathroom. The corresponding side on the opposite wall has another two doors, another bedroom and the master bedroom.

Gerard and I walk into the master, waving goodnight to Mikey, who childishly decides to take the room furthest from ours.

The room is really big, with a dresser, a bathroom, and a gigantic bed. The window is almost a floor to floor like the other one, but it has curtains which have been drawn and we decide not to pull them open because the sun will be out soon. I have never seen a bed so monstrously huge. It’s bigger than a king so I don’t know what exactly to call it, but the sheets Gerard brought aren’t going to fit over it.

We decide to just lay out a few blankets and deal with it when we wake up. By the time I collapse onto the bed in Gerard’s arms, I’m almost already asleep. It only takes me a few seconds before I drift back off into my dreams, thinking about stars this time.