Why Me?

“Watch it, fag!”

I had been leaning against my locker, innocently checking my timetable when someone barged into me and tripped over. And they had the nerve to blame it on me? It was obviously their fault!

“Maybe if you weren’t such a clumsy idiot you wouldn’t have knocked into me!” I shot back. No way was I going to stand for this. Especially after the morning I’d just had.

The hallway went silent, all staring at me like I had a death wish. I took a closer look at the dickhead who’d knocked into me, and my blood ran cold. Maybe I did have a death wish. For glaring at me, with resentment bubbling in his dark brown eyes, was none other than Victor Fuentes. The leader of the entire school. No-one, I mean no-one fucks with Vic unless they wanted to end up in hospital. And here I was, calling him a ‘clumsy idiot.’ Way to fucking go, Kellin.

Vic leaned into me and spoke, his voice dangerously calm. “What did you say to me?”

I could have lied. I could have acted timid, and said sorry. But no. Vic may be popular, but there was no way in hell I was gonna let him trod all over me. I had enough of that at home, and from the other bell-ends who ruled the school and called themselves ‘popular.’

I glared at Vic. “If your hearing’s that bad, maybe you should get it checked out. I don’t feel the need to repeat myself to a selfish bastard like you.”

Yup. I was dead, alright. I could tell from the murderous rage that suddenly took over the Mexican’s face that now would be a good time to run. So I did.

Clutching my timetable to my chest, I legged it down the corridor and headed for the school doors. Footsteps pounded in pursuit as Vic and his gang of Mexicans ran after me. Shit, shit, shit! I’d heard rumours about those guys, and not good ones either. One of them, Jaime, had apparently broken someone’s leg just because they wouldn’t do his Homework for him.

I saw the entrance hall just in front of me. Nearly there! Putting in a burst of energy, I sprinted for the door, ignoring the odd looks I was getting from other students. But I wasn’t fast enough.

Someone grabbed my hood from behind and spun me round until I was staring into the eyes of Tony Perry, Vic’s ‘second in command.’ He looked angry.

Vic sauntered up, walking as if he owned the whole school. Well, technically he did. I tried struggling in Tony’s grasp, but it was no use. So instead I turned to Vic and spat;

“I’m not scared of you or your stupid fucking Mexican friends!” Yeah, probably not the wisest move, but I was angry and grovelling just wasn’t in my nature.

Throwing me one last hateful glare, Vic turned to Tony, Mike and Jaime and said “Teach him a lesson he won’t forget in a hurry.”

Oh crap. I just about had to open my mouth in protest before Jaime took a swing at my stomach, winding me. Mike and Tony joined in, and soon I was on the ground being kicked at by steel capped boots. fuck it hurt. The beating brought back unwelcome memories of this morning at home. When will this end? When will this pathetic existence that is my life finally get better? You know you’re worthless when your own Dad hates you and wants you dead. Why can’t I have a Dad who loves me? Why can’t I have a father who actually wants me around? Instead I just had a douche bag who loved to beat me and assault me.

My thoughts distracted me from the blows I was receiving for a while, but they kept coming. I groaned in pain as one caught my nose, and curled into a foetal position in an attempt to shield my face.

Seriously, was no-one going to help? It was obvious someone was being beat up, but no-one was stopping to intervene, or attempting to save my sorry arse. But hey, that’s high school for you.
My torture was brought to an end with the shrill ring of a bell; time to go to lesson! Oh, the joy! But, to be honest, I’d rather sit in Maths class learning Algebra than lay here and get bullied further.
One more kick to the knee, and suddenly the pain subsided. I slowly uncurled in time to see the Mexican gang heading off to lesson, without giving me a second glance. I groaned. I was such a fucktard! I was already bullied and beat up on by every other kid in school, and now I’d gone and got involved with the most dangerous ones here. Slow applause for Kellin!

Painfully, I dragged myself to the bathroom and inspected the damage. My ribs were smattered with bright bruises, and I had a nasty looking gash on my cheek. No way was I finishing school like that. Fuck that shit.

I headed home, taking the long route through the forest. Woodland always calmed me down. Sitting down on a log, I listened to the breeze rustling the leafy tree branches and the birds twittering happily. I wondered what it was like to be that free. No rules. No bullies. No abusive fathers. No judgemental people to glare at you in disgust if you dare wear black and get piercings. No constant suicidal thoughts or feelings of worthlessness. Nothing but freedom.

I basked in the imaginary world I had laid out. If I closed my eyes and concentrated hard enough, it was almost like I was a bird, flitting away from my problems and heading for a better life. It was bliss.

But, like all good things, it didn’t last long. The honk of a car horn brought me back to reality, and I sighed. It was almost 3:30, meaning school would finish soon, and I needed to get home.

Or not. Call me a whimp, but to be honest I didn’t really feel like a third beating today, and that was surely what I would get it I went home to my father. I could always stay here the night. Yeah, that sounded good.

My mind set, I got up and searched for a bit until I found a springy bit of moss that could pass as a makeshift bed. I placed my school backpack as a pillow.

For the first time in weeks, I was happy. Forests had this effect on me. I just led there, my hands behind my head, and savoured my cheerful thoughts, knowing that they wouldn’t last long. As soon as I got back to my house, everything would be hell once again. But I decided not to think about that right now.

Eventually the sky darkened, and my stomach started to rumble. Oops. I forgot about dinner. Oh well, I’ll live, dinner was for pussies anyway . . . a loud growl showed that my stomach didn’t entirely agree with me on that.

Ah well. Might as well just get to sleep. So, that’s what I did, finally drifting off into a light slumber. I didn’t think about what might happen to me when I got home. I didn’t care. It was only my father, after all . . . he couldn’t do any serious damage . . .