The Girl With the Half Beating Heart

Its late at night, and Acacia sits in her hospital bed, mindlessly watching an infomercial about a giant ziploc bag that apparently ‘fixes all of your space issues!’. She glances to her dad, who is snoring lightly, sprawled out on the small sofa next to her bed. Her mom isn’t here, she’s at home with Acacia’s little sister. He’s a heavy sleeper, so she knows that she’ll be able to leave the room without him noticing at all. She looks at her heart monitor, which tells her that everything seems to be fine right now. She’s tired though, so she’s going to take it easy. She sits up in the bed, and takes the stickers off her chest. One more peek at her father, who is still in the same position he was in seconds ago. She turns to where her bare feet are on the cold linoleum floor, gripping the bed so she can slide out of it. It creaks slightly, and her head whips quickly to her father. He adjusts himself, but falls easily back into sleep. She stands up shakily, and walks to the door. She opens it quietly, steps outside her room, and shuts it just as quietly behind her.
She sighs as she leans on the wall in the wide hospital corridor, which smells like citrus cleaning products. It must have just been cleaned. She has no clue what time it is, but since its fairly empty in the hall, she figures it's late. Meaning its too late to go see Mr. Anonymous. Even if it wasn’t, she had no clue where he was. She couldn’t get him off her mind, his adorable lopsided smile, the way his hair always fell in his eyes, and the way he laughs, using his hand to cover his mouth. She can feel her her cheeks burning just thinking about him. But it’s not just his physical appearance she has an interest in, its him. He’s mysterious. Not like the bad boy mysterious, but more like the shy, quiet, reserved mysterious. She knows he got here for a reason, and she was dying to know. But she won’t, unless he tells her. And he’s not going to tell her until he knows her name, and she knows his.
She strolls to the elevator, humming a tune to herself as she taps the wall as she walks. Once inside the elevator, she sits for a second, deciding where to go. She decides to go to the roof, because she needs a change in scenery, and some fresh air as well.
She presses the button for the 6th floor, and the elevator shoots up. She looks down to her orange polished toes, and starts wiggling them for no reason at all. She continues doing this until the elevator dings, and she steps out of it. Turning the corner, she walks to the stairs, and pushes the door open. As she walks up the stairs, she sings aloud to herself.
“Jealously, turning saints into the seas. Swimming through sick lullabies, choking on your alibis.” She sings softly, walking slowly up the stairs, pacing herself. “But that's just the price I pay, destiny is calling me. Open up my eager eyes, cause I'm Mr. Brightside.” Her voice rings through the small stairwell, and she smiles. Acacia always found her best time came when she was alone, and not being smothered by practically everyone she knew. Despite the fact that she has a serious heart condition that could snatch her life at any second, she’s still a 16 year old girl. She still wants to go to homecoming in a sparkly dress, to put on lip gloss and short shorts to go to the mall with her friends, to have sleepovers and pig out in avocado masks with her friends as they talk about boys, and to just be with a boy in general. She never had a serious boyfriend. Everyone knows that week long relationships in middle school don’t count. Nonetheless, she wanted to be a girl. Not a girl with a heart condition, just an average 16 year old girl. But she’s come to figure out that we don’t always get what we want.
When she reaches the roof, she leans against the wall to catch her breath. Walking up the stairs is hard enough, but its even harder when your heart when your heart beats in a series of half beats. After catching her breath, Acacia pushes the door open slowly, the cool air already breezing in through the cracked door. Her lip begins to tremble. She opens it all the way, and steps completely out onto the freezing roof top. She’s immediately regretting this idea due to the cold, but she still needed fresh air. When she shuts the door behind her, she turns around, and stops in her tracks. Acacia’s not alone.
Someone is sitting on the edge of the roof, their hair blowing delicately in the wind. She almost goes back inside, when she realizes who it is. Its Alex. Or as she knows him, Mr. Anonymous. ‘Great minds think alike.’ She thinks to herself with a smile, as she bounces over to him.
“Ayo.” She chimes, her smile still on her face. He turns around, giving her a very faint smile, his face stained with tears. “Are you okay? What’s wrong?” She says, full of concern. She eases herself on the ledge next to him, and he scoots away from her. He shakes his head, and wipes his eyes. “Come on. Don’t shut me out, I’m already here.” Alex sighs.
“Its okay. I’m okay.” He whispers with a sniffle.
“No, its not. Please tell me. If anyone can understand at least a portion of what you’re feeling, its me.” She pleads, reaching out for his hand. He snatches it away, and Acacia awkwardly pulls hers back in.
“You can understand? Please.” He scoffs, wiping more tears from his eyes. The feeling of hurt emerges over her, and she looks down to her wiggling toes. They’re both so high up, that the rest of the world looks like ants. Alex sighs again.
“Look, I’m sorry okay. Its just, its best if you leave me alone right now.” He breathes out, glancing back up at the night sky.
“No way. Sorry but I won’t. You don’t look so good, and I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I left you and something happened.” She replies, and he turns to face her.
“Really?” He questions, his tone lightening. She nods. “Why though? You don’t even know my name.” He says quietly, looking down.
“Because you’re a person. And every person is worth something. We all have a purpose. Believe me, its sometimes hard to see that purpose. I’d know. I’m not sure if there’s an ending to any of this at all, or if its even pretty. Sometimes I wish the truth would just fly out of the sky. But I do know one thing, its that you should fight to see the end of it. Say that its not pretty at all. You’re gonna wanna wish you stayed to live more of your beautiful life, than be stuck in an ugly eternity. But you’re worth something. And you deserve any and anything you desire. I don’t know what I’m saying, I was never any good at giving condolences. But what I’m trying to say, is that every second your heart pumps blood through your veins, you’re still alive. And you’re alive for a reason.” She says with a smile, her dark hair swirling gently behind her in the wind behind her.
“I, uh,” He breathes out, his hand rubbing the back of his neck. “Thank you. That, that really means everything to hear right now.” He whispers in response, his smile widening as he wiped more tears.
“Don’t mention it. Tell you what kid, how about we go to the cafeteria, I buy you coffee, and we talk. Only if you wanna.” She looks to him with pleading eyes, praying that he’ll say yes. She really wanted to get to know him, and this was the best way how.
“Sure.” He says with a smile, and she smiles back. She gets up, and reaches her hand out to him. She pulls him up, and he dusts off his pajama pants. They walk to the door in silence, and he opens it, waving his hand out to her. She walks in first, and he follows suit.
“And I’m still older than you.” He smirks as they walk down the stairs.
“Don’t care, punk.”