You & I

I ran a hand over my slightly protruding stomach and glanced at Riley, who was still staring at the ultrasound. At twelve weeks, we found out that we were having twins.

Now we have to take care of not just one baby, but two.

We already had Squirt so we nicknamed baby 2, Peanut.

Squirt and Peanut were finally beginning to resemble babies. Our appointment took a while due to all of the tests they had to run and the questions we had to answer about family history. We had just returned home and Riley sat on the couch with a goofy smile on his face. I bit my lip and sat next to him on the couch, tucking my legs underneath me. Micah’s questions from two weeks ago were weighing heavily on my mind. How were Riley and I supposed to parent when we weren’t even sure of our relationship?

“We need to talk,” I mumbled.

Riley finally tore his deep brown eyes from the ultrasound and looked at me, “way to sound ominous.”

“I just think we should figure a few things out.”

“Like?” he asked.

“Like our relationship?” I blurted, “what the hell are we and what are we going to tell the babies?”

“We have a while to figure it out, don’t you think?” he responded, “Squirt and Peanut won’t be asking questions for a while.”

I huffed, “you’re missing the point, Riley.”

Riley sat the ultrasound down and turned his body to face me, “then what is the point I’m missing, Eden.”

Looking down, I closed my eyes and wished I would have kept my mouth shut, “I’m just a little confused.”

“About what?” He asked, “did something change when I wasn’t looking?”

I rubbed my arm and rolled my eyes, “I got pregnant, dipshit!”

“Yes, you did,” he replied, “what did you think changed other than that?”

I scoffed, “I fucking live with you! We sleep in the same damn bed!”

“We’ve slept in the same bed for years and now things are suddenly changing?” He questioned before shaking his head before standing up and walking away.

“Don’t walk away from me!”

“You,” he yelled accusingly as he pointed a finger towards me, “were the one to suggest no strings outside of friendship!”

I rolled my eyes, “I got pregnant!”

“You keep saying that. I understand that you are pregnant, but it isn’t an excuse to suddenly change things and expect me to agree.”

I clenched my teeth at his harsh words and looked down while he stormed away. Running my hand over my small bump, I decided to not take his words to heart. I had two weeks to come to terms with my feelings and options, so it would only be fair to give him time and space. Plus, I haven’t been particularly agreeable lately and Riley probably has a lot on his mind. He has to figure out a place to live, how to buy things for two babies now, how to pay for bills, and how to be a father. He didn’t have the same experience with kids that I have. There wasn’t a lot I could do, but I’ll try whatever I can to make the burden easier.

Even if it means attempting to be more patient and less bitchy.

“I love you two so much,” I whispered to my belly before humming the old rock song my father would sing to me when I was little. It was probably the happiest memory of him that I had. When I got a bit older and asked him about the song, he gave me a sly smile and wouldn’t tell me the name since it was our ‘special’ thing. I never had the heart to look it up against his wishes; he held onto hope that he would sing it to me again.

Guess he can’t now.

About thirty minutes later, Riley came down the stairs and sat next to me once again. We sat in silence as he stared at the ultrasound once again.

“Why is it so important for you to put a label on our relationship?”

“I just want us to be a family. My mom was always too busy and my father stopped doing things with me when I got older; I didn’t want that to happen to us,” I explained.

Riley gave a small, humorless laugh, “I guess neither of us have had family beyond your father and my uncle.”

“Liam is enough family for me.”

He smiled at my comment and wrapped his arm around my shoulder, “I’ll get back to you on your relationship question. I’m sorry for snapping at you.”

I shrugged lightly, “I suppose I was using pregnancy as an excuse, so I should be the one apologizing.”

“So, do you want two boys, two girls, or one of each?” He asked.

“I heard that whatever the father wants is the gender. I, personally, want two healthy babies,” I answered, “so what do you want?”

Riley became silent for a long while and I almost fell asleep before he responded, “I want two girls who look just like their mother.”

I rolled my eyes and elbowed him in the ribs jokingly, “I want two boys that look just like you.”

“No, no, no. Those poor kids. Why would you curse them?”

I laughed and shook my head, glad that things quickly went back to normal.

∆∆∆∆

{Clothing}

Two days after my altercation with Riley, I met with Micah to show her the pictures of Squirt and Peanut and tell her about everything. I adjusted my flow-y skirt and sat in the booth in front of her while mumbling a greeting.

“Your belly is getting big!” She squealed before reaching out, “let me see my goddaughter!”

“Plural,” I responded with a roll of my eyes and slid her the photos, “and stick with gender neutral!”

“Twins!” Micah exclaimed and fawned over the pictures, “you can even see the beginning of the two little heads!”

“I know. It’s pretty weird to think about it,” I told her, “like right now, I have two things growing inside of me that have fingernails and eyes and all kinds of organs. It’s crazy to think that these little things are going to have personalities and an entire life. Kind of amazing, if you ask me.”

“Awww. You’re becoming a romantic pregnant,” she cooed.

I scoffed and dove into the story of what happened with Riley and she was soon shaking her head in slight annoyance.

“So you two have made no progress?”

“Not true. He just needs time to sort everything out. There must be a lot going on in his head right now,” I replied with a defensive tone, “we did just find out that there are two babies instead of one. That means double the expenses.”

“At least things are out in the open now, I guess,” she responded and proceeded to tell me about this guy that has been flirting with her lately, Kyle.

We were soon leaving the restaurant and I drove back to Riley’s house with a smile and a good mood.