635798

Someone shook me awake the next morning. The Nazi ordered me to follow him out of the room. I wasn’t allowed to change clothes, eat, or drink. I was stuck in my stiff, black sweater and pants, an empty stomach, and a dry throat.

There was no blinding light when I walked out of my prison closet. The shades were down and no one left a lamp light on. As I walked, the floor creaked loudly as if it was screaming at me that I was going to die. I tripped over a misshapen floorboard, scraping my knee. I cried out in agony for a split second but then stopped. The Nazi was glaring at me and he made no move to help me up. Once I was up, I shuffled my feet the rest of the way.

At the door, I was told to hold my hands behind my back. Once I did this the Nazi wrapped a rope tightly around my wrists and it became impossible to move them away from each other. The Nazi snickered at me before opening the doors.

There was barely any sunlight outside. It was very hazy and the cold air nipped my face. No one was around the camp for miles so the crunch of the snow under my feet was able to echo. The Nazi walked ahead of me, rifle in position. Every now and then he would jump around to face and point the rifle at me. I was never phased. I always stood in place.

“You’re not afraid?” the Nazi asked after the umpteenth time.

I slowly shook my head.

The Nazi was silent, considering this for a minute. Then he asked, “Are you afraid to die?”

I shrugged.

“How do you not know?”

“I just… don’t. I’ve never been in a near death experience before.”

“Well now you’re in one,” the Nazi snapped. “And everyone will be watching.”

“Alright,” was all I said in reply.

The farther we walked through Bergen-Belsen, the sadder it became. Tents were getting closer together, creating paths that were impossible to walk through. Some tents didn’t have their covers anymore so beds and blankets sat free in the open. Everything was covered in dried mud and there were even uniforms and other tattered articles of clothing flying around. I saw some bodies, frozen and buried in the snow. When I told the Nazi about this, his shoulders shook in a silent laugh. I sighed, watching my clouded breath fly deeper into the eerie, empty camp.

We reached an area of the camp that would have been clear if not for all the people. Prisoners, Aufseherinnon, Nazis, Kapos, and others were gathered around in a circle, shoulder to shoulder. In the middle of their circle was something that seemed to be a wooden doorway. Two very tall wooden pillars stood up and carried another wooden pillar on top of them. From the top pillar hung four nooses. A chair sat underneath the one all the way to my left.

The Nazi nudged me with his elbow and bobbed his head towards the nooses. “There’s your reward.”

I had the sudden urge to punch him.

He led me to those nooses, holding my bicep as if terrified I was going to try to get away. Prisoners watched me, eyes glistening. Some seemed thankful. Some seemed nervous. I heard laughter, no doubt from the Nazis and Aufseherinnon. I looked down at my feet and made sure not to make eye contact with anyone.

Once I was standing on the chair, the Nazi wrapped the noose around my neck and tightened it. I scanned everyone in front of me, looking for anyone I knew. My stomach dropped, and my knees began to shake. Unintentionally, I squeezed my hands into tight fists. I felt tears in my eyes but I didn’t let them escape.

A tall Nazi with a beer-gut stepped forward and faced the crowd in front of me. “We gathered you all here today to see what happens when one Nazi betrays the lot.” He faced me, glared, and turned back. “When one loves the enemy and does anything to save it. When one escapes the camp but eventually gets caught. This is a lesson to be learned by all of you. Don’t fight against your own kind.” The Nazi turned to me again. “We won, Herr Heilbronner. The good always do.” He faced a man I recognized right away. “You know what to do.”

Arzt Mengele stepped forward. He made eye contact with me, and I honestly couldn’t tell if he was disappointed or concerned with me. By this point I didn’t care. He would one day pay for his atrocities. That I was sure of.

The emptiness in my stomach grew bigger, creating a piercing pain. I curled my toes, hoping it would tense me legs to stop them from shaking. The cold was making my eyes tear but I nearly strained them to hold back. I didn’t want people to know I was afraid. I wanted Vater to tell my family I died proud, with no regrets. Did he even tell them what happened? Was Aalyshah sitting on her bed, crying and locked in her room? Where were Abbey and Mutter? Was Marta still at her parents’ house? She was bound to be worried about 635798’s sudden disappearance. Would she be there for 635798 when I was gone?

As Arzt Mengele rubbed his leg, I caught sight of a familiar group of people. Lenz and Kurt stood at my right, both of them smirking. Lenz’s wasn’t as severe as Kurt’s, but it was still a smirk. He was on their side and didn’t care his friend was doing to die. I was the Jew-lover, after all.

Vater stood behind the two of them. His eyes were shiny, and he had his hands wrapped tightly around the rifle’s strap as if he was trying to contain himself. On the ground next to him sat a prisoner. She was wrapped in a uniform that was slightly dirty but fresh nevertheless. All her hair was gone but the centimeter that was left was a luscious brunette. One leg was hugged to her chest. The other was laid out straight in front of her, wrapped in a bandage. From where I was, I could see her eyes getting brighter. The right was a chocolate brown and the left had a green tint. We made eye contact, and once a tear streamed down her face, I let mine go.

The chair was kicked out from under me.