Heart's Desire

Last night. Carter hurt me, emotionally, physically and mentally, but one thing that is for certain was, i am stupid as can be, because i am staying with him. Mandy was right, he is controlling.

"You are quiet," Cater mumbles as he sits on his sofa drinking his coffee.

"I need you to explain to me why you were so harsh last night." i whisper. blocking out his darkness and anger expression on his face.

"You have no reason to doubt me Jess." he says calmly, his body language says something complete different.

"Actually you are giving me one now Carter, and last night."

His lips turns into a thin line as he place his coffee mug on the black marble stone table. "What do you wan't me to say than?" He inquires folding his arms to his broad chest.

"Don't you trust me to tell me why you were so evasive last night, hell Carter you hurt me, you made me utter the words 'i hate you' and i never and i mean ever said that to anyone before in my life,"

Carter grabbed his Sunday newspaper and turn it around to the business section. "You have to trust me when i say i am sorry."

"Trust go both ways Carter." i mummer gazing at him.

He lowers his newspaper and suck in a deep breath. "Don't look at me like that."

"Like what?" i ask.

He wave his hand to and fro shaking it, "like i am a lost soul indeed of help and sympathy."

"Are you?" i am going up those stairs and if i fall flat on my face, it is my own fault because i am reaching a ten foot poll knowing i can't reach, but hell i am going to try, i wan't to know this man in front of me, not physically but emotionally as well. Is that to much to
ask?

i am in love with this deep, tender man who still had his mask on from last night.

"i saw her last night." i whisper when he did not respond.

"Who?"

"Bianca," i breathe going up and down in my converse sneakers, Carter's white shirt hanging like a dress on me almost hiding my skinny jeans to my knees.

He scowled. "I don't understand."

"Are you all of a sudden stupid?" i snap putting my hand on my hip. "She was at the ball and so gracefully threaten me to stay away from you." I could not help but let my inner goddess take this one, she is wittier and powerful than me.

"You think i invited her?" His tone clipped and icy as he raise up from the sofa, Carter cross his arms; his shirt tucked in and collar open; which i found so sexy. Damn his hot body.

i scoff an irritable scoff pushing my lips out in a small pout. "Gee, i don't know."

"You think i cheated right?"

i shook my head to quickly, my position still the same, bitch mode. "That was not what i referred to Carter and you know it."

"You are reversing this to me now, so i can forget about what happen with you boyfriend? reverse psychology nice." he mummers giving me a thumbs up walking to his kitchen.

"Excuse me, no i was not!" My tone began to came rigid and well uncertain.

i twirl around with a anger expression. "Your so called wife threaten me and you are just gonna stand there," i wave at what he is doing. "Eating pie?"

he lean on the counter lifting the fork to his mouth putting it slowly in. "You wan't some?"

"No!" i bellow "i don't want pie!"

Carter's face light up in amusement at my outburst. "It's not funny!"

"I think it is." He laughs that send sweet shivers down my spine, i like it when he laughs, for some reason it breaks tension, can make a dark room lighter, can make me even love him more than before.

"Stop it." i snap angrily walking to the counter sitting across from him on one his bar stools. I seize the from his hand digging it into the center of the pie, "Why can't we never finish a conversation or a fight?"

He points to his mouth as the piece of pie landed in him as i fed the piece that was left on the fork. "Different."

"We are not different than anybody else."

He cock his head to one side leaving me with a breathtaking smirk. "I am a College professor having an affair with one of his students," he scoffs. "yeah baby we are so normal."

I just rolled my eyes at him putting more pie in my mouth. A simple tune distract our comfortable silence which made me jump.

Carter pulled out his I-PHONE holding it to his ear, "Grey." he answers, so clip and subtle.

"Yes, uh we haven't eaten..." he mummers to the person on the other end of the line.

"Yes, we; i am with someone,"

Who was he talking to?

"With Jessica."

No ones knows about us, not even Mandy, who could he of told about us? "No, she is my assistant, there is nothing going on between us. We just have a lot of work to get done before tomorrow."

My eyes grew wide as fear spreads across me, my final fucking exam is tomorrow and i have not even touched a book!!!!

Carter turns to me with his brow arch. i just gave him a smile and bow my head back to the blueberry pie. "That would work, okay bye."

i look up once again seeing him sliding his phone into his black trousers. "That was my mom."

"Your mom? here i thought it was business call, you sounded cold."

"You wanna talk about who is being cold to who now?" I do not have the energy to deal with another Damon and Jessica past session. a night and a day is enough.

"You want to piss all over me now?" i spat out throwing the fork on the pie resting my back on the barstool.

He rolls his eyes and sighed heavily. "Brunch with my family you are invited as well, seeing you are here."

"You know what happen last time at brunch right? You cornered me in an alley."

Carter's mouth quirk up into a small smile as he push his hair out his face. "Good times." Good times? if i can recall it was not a good time, it was terrifying.

"You need me to come with?"

"i want you to come with me, no excuses." He grumbles walking around the counter to his bed room.

"I have nothing to wear!"

He twirl around stalking my body up and down. "There is a few dresses in the hallway up stairs, i am sure it will fit you." he turn back around leaving me utterly confused.

Two things popped into my head;

he is either a drag queen or its clothing from his former lover.....sorry lovers.

i really hope it is the first one and not the second.