Swept Away

THE NEXT CLASS I WENT TO, nearly a week after Riley’s lips had brushed against mine and he had killed what little sanity I had left going for me, was a bad one. He came into the room about fifteen minutes late. The normal enthusiastic disposition he carried when in the class was gone, and his usual clean-cut look was nowhere to be found. Instead of the neatly pressed button up shirt and slacks, he was in a tee shirt and jeans. The biggest indicator that there was something wrong, was the way he looked out, like everyone sitting before him was a giant pain in his ass.

The fact that his eyes skipped right over me solidified the fact that he was in a foul mood.

“Thank you for deciding to join us this evening, Ms. Snow.” He snapped, sarcasm and dripping from his words as he kept his eyes on his messenger bag. As he pulled out a DVD, a few people looked over at me and sent me worried yet caring expressions. To them, I simply smiled back and shrunk down in my seat, my fingers trembling as they traced invisible shapes on the desk.

Without another word, Professor Collins walked over to the podium, slid the disc into the computer and then leaned against it, running a hand through his hair as his cold eyes lifted from the screen and fell right on me.

Staring at me, I felt like I was about to burst into hysterical tears. His eyes were slicing through every layer of my skin, one by one, and slowly making their way into my organs, ripping and burning everything that stood between his gaze and my heart. I had never felt so embarrassed and sick in my life.

The movie started a short time after, breaking the gaze between us. He informed the class that the video was important and would be on the final, so notes weren’t optional. With a collective sigh from the class, the movie began and droned on and on for what felt like hours.

Halfway through the documentary my eyelids began to get heavy, and the urge to collapse onto my small desk and sleep ran through my mind plenty of times, but every time my head would drop down a fraction of an inch, my eyes would snap back open and lock onto the bodies moving on the screen.

Not one word that had played through the room stayed in my head, and as the screen turned black and papers started to rustle, I had absolutely no idea what the movie was about. I couldn’t tell you one fact or one person’s name. It had gone through one ear and right out of the other.

“Alright, go home.” Professor Collins stated and without a word the class quickly grabbed their things and quickly walked to the door, their eyes wide as they took long strides across the front of the room near the distraught professor. Once the room was empty, I slowly pulled my bag onto my back, trying to avoid the new bruise that was forming along my spine and shuffled my way to the front of the room.

Keeping my eyes forward, I walked passed the desk and the man sitting at it and headed for the door. Nearly a step away from reaching the doorknob, a long sigh filled the air and caused my fingers to stop in the air, like someone had hit the pause button on my life.

“Why didn’t you show up last class, Harper?”

I squeezed my eyes shut as the question rocked my brain. Do I tell the truth or lie? I am dealing with a psychology professor who was basically trained to tell the difference.

“Sorry.” I managed and placed my hand on the doorknob when I heard him call my name again, his soft whisper asking me to turn around and talk to him before I left. Pausing at the door again, my eyes fluttered shut as my shoulders slumped forward, my heart aching as the air around me became unbearably tense.

Turning toward the front of the room, my breath caught in my chest as my eyes locked onto the man who was standing nearly two feet in front of me, his eyes already locked onto mine as he roughly chewed on his bottom lip, his fingers laced together as he bent them in and out, letting small pops filled the air.

As we stood there, staring at each other, Riley sighed heavily and dropped his eyes to the floor. “The other night-“

“I don’t want to talk about this.”

“Harper.” My name slipped through his lips in a stern tone, “Clearly what happened the other night bothered you or-“

“Bothered me?” The anger that I had usually kept bottled up in the pit of my stomach was starting to escape. “Bothered me? You almost kissed me, and then you just… you rejected me a second later. You didn’t even think it through!”

“Think it through?” His eyes were wide as he stared at me, his eyebrows meeting in the center of his forehead. “You’re my student, Harper.” Riley walked up to me, placing his hands on my shoulders, making me shrink under his gaze. “There is absolutely nothing to think through, nothing can happen between us. Please, you’re too bright to be swept up in some petty little crush, especially with me.” He laughed as he rolled his eyes and shook his head. “You can do far better, so let’s just forget about this, alright?”

“Why were you in such a bad mood today.” I asked, ignoring the whole speech he just gave me. I wasn’t sure if I was too caught up in his eyes or I didn’t want to hear or believe what he was saying. It could have been that his overall bad mood was just more intriguing than our cliché student-teacher crush conversation.

As his eyes focused on mine, he shook his head and let out a deep sigh as he walked back up to his desk and quickly made sure he had everything. Once he placed his messenger bag over his shoulder, he walked up to me, our arms touching, and motioned me outside.

Following him down the hall, the strong smell of his cologne hit my face causing my senses to become numb to anything other than him. My eyes stayed locked onto his body, the cool yet simple way he walked, to the loose strands of brown hair that swayed softly in the air as he took every step.

Outside, we paused in the small spot against the railing to the ramp that lead to the door. Before I could work the pocket on the side of my book bag open, Riley had a cigarette held out to me while he skillfully lit his own.

“I have my own.”

“I insist, I know you like the minty ones, Harper.” He sent me a warm smile as I shrugged a little and then placed the paper between my lips and held out my hand for the lighter. Taking a few steps closer to me, he leaned toward me and glances at me right before he lit the end of the rolled up piece of paper. Watching the end glow in the night, I sucked in a deep breath, my eyes fluttering shut as the smoke filled every inch of empty space in my head and lungs.

Exhaling up, I ignored all of the beautiful stars hanging above me and directed my eyes toward my shoes, tracing alone every single little bump and crack in the cement I was standing on. After nearly smoking my whole cigarette, Riley took a step in front of me and dropped his cigarette to the ground and then rubbed his heel into it.

“Why aren’t you looking at the stars.” He inquired, his bright eyes catching mine the moment I tilted my head away from the cement. As I stared at him, right into his bright blue eyes that shimmered from the lamppost light, I felt my breath catch and instead of answering I simply shrugged. “You always look at the stars.”

Again I shrugged, but as I watched his facial features become frustrated, I exhaled slowly and dropped what was left of my cigarette to the ground. “They’re around every night.” I breathed; my eyes trying their hardest t leave the stare.

“Isn’t that? But… Harper look at me.” He begged, his fingertips brushing against the bare skin on my hands. “What is wrong with you, Harper Snow? Why are you so sad?”

“Nothing new.” I replied shortly, my body begging me to light another cigarette between my lips. “Just a bit tired is all, nothing to worry about.” I bit my tongue as the words fell from my mouth. It was obvious that when a college student, especially one with my track record, said that there was nothing to worry about, there was a whole ton of shit to stress over.

Inhaling deeply, I winced as the skin against my back, that was starting to turn purple, stretched over my bones in an uncomfortable way. Hands balling into fists, I shut my eyes momentarily and then reopened them, watching the man before me turn from worried to angry within seconds.

Pulling his lips between his teeth, he nodded a little and then looked at me, his bright blue eyes now cold and stern, much like they have been throughout the whole class. “He hit you again, didn’t he?”

I couldn’t help but to gawk at the man, my eyes widening more than they had been in a while, and my lips parting, letting whatever air that was around me to fill my lungs. My heart pounded against my rib cage as I shook my head a little and then sighed heavily, my hand working its way into the back pocket as I pulled out my pack of cigarettes and quickly pulled one out and my lighter.

Placing the paper between my lips, I went to light the end when the paper was pulled from my lips and tossed on the floor. “Harper, answer my question.”

“Just fucking drop it, please.” I growled, my eyes focused on the cigarette on the ground. “Why do you care anyway? That whole, you’re my student speech is so overused.”

“I don’t like knowing that my… You are getting abused like this.”

“I’ve been dealing with it for two years and some change, and I’m perfectly fine.” I went to grab another cigarette when I noticed the stern look on Riley’s face. Sighing in frustration, I went to walk away when he stuck his arm out and stopped me from walking passed him.

“Why don’t you tell anyone?”

“Oh brilliant, let me complain to dyphus that I’m a twenty year old college student living at home that gets beat up. What are they going to do? Put me in a foster home? No. They’re going to lock my dad up and my ass is going to be in deep, homeless, school debt, shit.”

Riley didn’t speak after my aggravated speech. I knew that I could have come off selfish, using my father for a place to live and his money to pay for my education, but it was the least he could do after taking my mother away from me, and beating me up every other day. Swallowing hard, I pinched the bridge of my nose and tapped my foot on the ground, my nerves vibrating under my skin. “I really would like to go home.”

“Do you understand that I worry about you?” His eyes met mine, and I silently thanked whoever was watching over us for making the man change his eyes from the cold icy blue to the warm pools that I enjoyed staring into. “Every single night, all I can think about is if you’re alright. Do you know how… how much it bothers me that I can’t do anything about this?”

“You’re helping me more than you think by not.”

“Why are you so dedicated, Harper? Why are you so pleasantly different than everyone else?” He took a step closer to me, his eyes catching mine as we stood inches away from each other.

“My mother was the same way.” I breathed softly as his uneven inhales and exhales beat against the sensitive skin on my lips, making the nerves in my spine explode one by one. “I guess I got it from her.”

The brunette standing in front of me nodded as he took another short inhale and leaned a little closer to me, his lips barely brushing against mine. “You should push me away, Harper. Please, just push me away.” He begged as his eyes zeroed in on my lips, making every single inch of my body feel like it was engulfed in a raging fire.

“I don’t want to.” I whispered, my eyes catching his one last time before he leaned in a little closer and pressed his soft lips against my own. After holding his lips to mine for what felt like seconds, he pulled away and went to speak when I quickly kissed him again, my hands running from his sides up to his chest. As he shivered under my touch, he quickly put his arms on my hips and pressed his fingers into my skin, making me gasp from the pressure.

After a minute or two, he pulled away and pressed his forehead against my own, his wide blue eyes peering into mine. “This isn’t good.”

“Neither is smoking.” I retorted and watched as the serious expression on his face quickly lifted, and a smirk played on his lips, sending my heart rate off the charts.

“We can’t… You can’t tell anyone about this.” He whispered, his blue eyes dropping down to out feet. “Promise?” With a simple nod, he smiled at me and took a step back, sucking in a deep breath as he ran a shaking hand through his hair and turned away from me, his eyes dancing around the buildings.

“We should be getting home. I’ll see you next class, Harper?”

“I’ll think about it.” I joked and watched as he smiled at me, his eyes shimmering in the moonlight.

“No poetic comeback?” He chuckled as I shrugged a little, my nerves still vibrating under my skin from the memory of his lips on mine. As the memory sent my heart pounding against my ribcage again, I took a huge inhale and shook my head, focusing my eyes on the pathway I needed to take to get home.

“Maybe next class.”

“I can’t wait.” He responded and with a simple wave, we headed off in different directions.

I was halfway home when I really realized what I had just gotten myself into.