Hell Above

Alex wakes up Sunday morning too hot and uncomfortable under Jack’s thick black duvet comforter. He opens his eyes to see the ceiling fan stood still above him, realizing it’s the cause of his disturbance and rolling over to get up and turn it on so he can go back to sleep. It’s been the first night he’s slept through till morning in over two weeks now.

It dawns on him what day it is when he shifts to find an oversized stuffed animal waiting on the bed beside him. He sits up and lets the annoyance fade from his body, smiling despite himself as he looks over the thing.

It’s a flying bison, an exact copy of Appa from the blonde’s favorite T.V. series, and as far as stuffed animals go, it’s rather large. There’s a bundle of several white balloons tied around the animal’s middle, making the plush hover a few inches above the mattress, giving off the notion that it’s, well, flying. And that answers the question of why the fan has been turned off.

Alex pulls the plush onto his lap, making to untie the string holding the balloons once he notices a paper folded and tucked neatly against the animal’s side underneath it. Pulling the note loose, he watches the balloons float up to rest against the ceiling before unfolding the paper to read over the younger’s messy handwriting.

alex,

first off, good morning and happy birthday. I hope you’re feeling okay today, because I don’t want you to be bummed out. I know it’s been hard for you this past week or so and you had said you didn’t want to do anything special today, so don’t worry, I’m not going to make you go anywhere or celebrate.

I got you your own Appa, 1. because you said you didn’t want anything, but I think you knew I was going to get you something anyways, and 2. because I really had no idea what to get you. I think he’s cute though, so I hope you like him. please don’t ask how much he was either, it really doesn’t
matter.

so 24 yeah? at least people can like you this year, right? I sure do.

this is loaded and I know you probably don’t want to read this right now, but I want you to know that you’re the most important thing in my life, and I don’t want you to ever doubt that. you mean the world to me, lex, and I would tell you out loud but I know I’d get emotional and it would be a mess.
you should know i’m pretty shit at writing letters so I should wrap this up now. I just want to let you know how happy I am you’re still here. we’ve made it through almost 6 years together and that’s sort of crazy to me. I’m really glad you decided to let me in, even just a little bit.

happy birthday, I love you x

- Jack

p.s. you were snoring super loud last night and it was kind of adorable

The words pull at the blonde’s chest in a way that he hasn’t been able to feel for days now, and it’s nice – it’s sweet and exactly what he had wanted when he’d asked Jack not to get him anything. Refolding the note, he gets up and places it on the nightstand. He heads out of the bedroom with Appa tucked against his chest, both arms wrapped securely around the plush’s middle.

Padding into the kitchen with sock-covered feet, Alex is presented a blueberry muffin and aspirin by Jack, whose lips curl up into the slightest crooked smile when the blonde accepts the food easily.

“Happy Birthday.” Jack says, empty hands coming together in front of him to toy with his fingers. Alex suspects the action is to keep from reaching out for him instinctively.

He returns the younger’s smile with a small one of his own, offering out a quiet “Thanks” as he hands over his stuffed animal to Jack in favor of eating his muffin. The younger sets the plush on the countertop beside them before his hands find themselves again.

The blond eats in silence, completely aware of how uncomfortable the air between them is. It’s the same uneasy atmosphere that’s hung between them since he woke up the morning after, and he’s not sure if he’s made it up in his head or if Jack feels it too. He’s not going to ask.

-

They wind up settled down on the couch, Jack sitting up at one end with his feet propped up on the coffee table, and Alex curled up on his side at the other. He’s got Appa pressed against his chest, with an arm draped over the plush, and surprisingly the pressure to his chest is doing good to numb his healing ribs.

Jack had put on season three of Avatar at the elder’s request, insisting that he didn’t mind watching it for the rest of the day if it would make the blond happy. Currently, they’re four episodes in, and Alex’s eyes have been getting heavy since the middle of episode two.

Because of the nightmares that fuck up his sleep each night, it has become routine that the blond nap during the day. And despite actually getting a full night’s sleep last night, he’s still drowsy and out of sync. Sitting up, he sets Appa on the floor in front of him before turning to Jack. The younger meets his eyes and nods despite being slightly surprised when the elder requests, “Can I put my head in your lap?”

“D’you want a pillow?” The younger questions, but doesn’t wait for an answer before placing a throw pillow across his lap anyways. He knows his boy. Jack just barely catches the way Alex’s lips curl up at the gesture as the blond settles back down, head on the pillow in Jack’s lap and blond hair splaying out against the fabric.

Alex has his head turned to continue watching T.V., despite being on his back, so he’s unaware that Jack is now focused on him completely. After a minute, the younger speaks up again, asking quietly, “Can I play with your hair?” This is the closest they’ve been and the most physical contact they’ve made since the younger found out what happened two weeks ago, and so he’s not entirely sure how far he’s allowed to go. Alex calls the shots here.

The elder simply hums in compliance though, and it’s almost as if things are okay between them, at least in that moment.

Jack let's his fingers run through the blond's hair at the base of his neck. And when Alex mumbles, "You can watch something else, y'know," he simply chuckles, but doesn't reach for the remote.