Sequel: Convalescence ›
Status: ayeee
Hell Above
XL
The only sounds in the entire apartment are centered in the bathroom where Andrew Mcmahon’s lyrics are being nearly drowned out by the water spilling down from the bathtub faucet.
Jack is sat cross-legged, as best he can given his current seat in the confined tub. He turns his head to the side, leaning back onto the tiled wall behind him as he looks over the man next to him.
Alex has his eyes closed, body relaxed against the curve of the tub wall, and legs bent at the knee. The tub’s jets are turned on, bubbles coursing up to disrupt the boxers the blond has on under the water.
The elder had insisted on not being naked, and Jack hadn't argued. He’s clad in boxers as well.
Jack faces forward again, eyes shifting down to read the time displaying on his iPod doc from where he’d set it up on the floor near the outlet opposite the tub. It’s pushing 4 in the morning, and if he’d been asked a few months ago how he thought he’d spend his Christmas morning this year, Jack wouldn't have even come close to being correct.
The song cuts out to be replaced by the next track on the album and Jack closes his eyes.
After another couple of minutes, by the time he can feel the water level creeping up to his chest, Jack sits up off of the wall to turn off the faucet.
“Do you believe in soul mates?” Alex asks then, eyes remaining closed.
Jack is quiet, considering the question for a bit. “I believe in you and me, if that’s what you mean.” He replies, turning his body so that he’s facing the blond, inching forward in the water the slightest to avoid hitting his back against the faucet.
“It’s not.” Alex states. He opens his eyes at that, sitting up as well. A small smile is offered to the younger, and then he’s elaborating. “I mean like – the whole, ‘one true love’ thing. Do you think that people are meant to be with certain people? Like there’s a match for everyone and everyone has a match. Destiny and the whole nine yards?”
“To be honest, I don’t know what I think.” Jack offers, shrugging to emphasize his lack of opinion.
Alex scoots back, relaxing his legs to cross in front of him, mimicking the younger’s position. He eyes Jack momentarily, and then drops his vision to his hands underwater. Jack had noticed over the years Alex’s draw to water. It relaxes the elder noticeably, and it’s the main reason why Jack had suggested taking a bath.
“I think –” Alex begins, pausing to pull his lip under his teeth briefly. “I think that the entire concept of soul mates is dumb.”
Jack raises an eyebrow, waiting until the elder lifts his head so that their eyes meet again before asking, “Why?”
It’s Alex’s turn to shrug then. “It just seems silly to me. Don’t get me wrong – I believe in real, true love and falling in love and all that, but only having one person that you’re destined to be with? It’s just unrealistic.
“Like, think of it this way – You've met how many people in your life… probably thousands, and you’ll probably meet at least a thousand more. And at any point in meeting them, you could have pursued a relationship, right? It all depends on your choices. Humans have so many choices that they make, and just one of those choices can change the entire course of their lives. It doesn't add up, the idea that everything you do in life is ‘meant to happen.’ I think a lot of it just happens, and your life turns out how you make it.”
“The same goes for relationships. They’re completely dependent on the choices that you make. And so, to me, soul mates don’t exist. You can end up with anyone, in theory, and still fall in love with them and live your life together. It just depends on who you choose and if both of you choose to make it work.”
He stops then, meeting the younger’s eyes and looking somewhat flustered, as if he hadn't meant to state all of that. “Does that makes sense?”
Jack nods, still taking in everything Alex had just said. “Yeah, it does. But I don’t completely agree with you.”
“Oh. Okay, Mr. I don’t know, do you have an opinion now?” Alex taunts, a smile playing at his lips as he looks at Jack.
The younger just laughs, replying honestly, “Maybe.”
When he doesn't actually explain though, the elder reaches forward, nudging his leg underwater as if to say go on then, prove me wrong.
Jack smiles, glad to see the other man relaxed enough to be like this with him. It’s been weeks now since he’s seen this side of Alex, and he’s relieved to see it’s still there. “I think it makes more sense, to me at least, to think of it, like, instead of having one set soul mate, you sort of choose your soul mates.”
The blond nods, and Jack continues, “I think there are people in life that you’re meant to be with. And maybe they aren't specific people, but more-or-less just people with certain characteristics that effect you. Like how they say everyone you meet is a lesson – I think that there are types of people you’re supposed to meet, and maybe fall in love with, in order to gain something from them.
But at the same time, I agree with you that destiny seems like a stupid concept when applied to real life. I think it’s just something people use to feel okay. Because if things are just ‘meant to happen,’ then they don’t have to feel guilty or responsible for them, y’know?”
Alex nods at the explanation and they both lapse into silence as High Dive comes on to fill in for the quiet.
It’s a few minutes before Jack speaks again, meeting the blonde’s eyes as he states, “I do believe that no matter what, despite all of the choices that I've made or didn't take, that I was meant to meet you.”
Alex just smiles at that, bottom lip finding place between his teeth for a moment before being released, and then he agrees, “Me too.”
-
“Trust me.” Jack says, offering his hand out for the elder to take.
Alex does, and despite the thick gloves both of them are wearing, the gesture still holds a lot of intimacy.
Seven is creeping up on them now, and their lack of sleep tonight has taken its toll. They make their way out of the apartment, Jack a step ahead of Alex to lead him wherever.
They take the elevator to the highest level of the building, and then Jack leads them over to the stairwell at the far end of the hallway, shouldering open the door to the landing. Alex pauses, eyeing the younger momentarily before realizing where he’s taking them.
He steps past the threshold, beginning to make his way up the steps before Jack follows, letting the door shut behind them. It quickly snuffs out the light the hallway had provided, and the space is plunged into black.
“Shit.” Alex hisses, instinctively reaching over for the banister.
Jack catches up to him, placing a cautious hand against his back as he reassures, “I’m right here.”
Alex holds still, letting his breathing even out and then reaches down to take Jack’s hand. The younger is surprised, but accepts it none-the-less. They continue slowly up the steps, feeling their way up the dark stairwell as best they can.
When they get to the top, Jack pushes open the door, pausing in the threshold and holding it open slightly to allow light to pass through. He turns to Alex, promising, “I know it’s freezing out, but I think the view should be worth it.”
The blond simply nods, stepping out onto the rooftop while Jack holds the door for him.
The air hits hard against his skin, and he’s glad that he put more than one layer on. It’s not snowing now, but there’s still dirty drifts and slush lining the streets below them from the previous days. The view isn't much now, aside from the familiar high rises around them, and the sky is a hazy blue. But Alex is well aware of how much the oncoming sunrise will change it.
Jack pulls him over to the edge of the rooftop, and Alex briefly considers that this isn’t the best place to bring a suicidal person, but he suppresses that thought quickly. They sit down, neither bothering to let go of the other’s hand, and they wait.
Alex watches as the sun rises, taking in the sky being brushed with layers of pinks and shades of blue against the bold orange surrounding the center. Jack stays beside him, and the blond is aware of how the younger is watching him instead of the sky, but he doesn’t care.
“Merry Christmas.” Jack says eventually, gripping the blonde’s hand a bit tighter.
When the cold finally pushes them in, the sky has evened out to a crisp winter blue, so transparent it almost looks white.
Alex has seen a lot of sunsets in his life, and yet somehow this one means something a bit more than the rest.
He lets Jack pull him up off of the concrete, following the younger back inside and down the stairs into the elevator. The warmth that immediately surrounds them upon entering the building has their cheeks flushing pink and pulls tired, yet content smiles onto both of their faces.
They return to the apartment, heading for the bedroom and peeling their layers of clothes off until they’re both just in boxers and t-shirts. The sheets are cold as they lie down to sleep, but Alex thinks it’s okay. Reaching across the space between them, he takes the younger’s hand once again.
Jack is sat cross-legged, as best he can given his current seat in the confined tub. He turns his head to the side, leaning back onto the tiled wall behind him as he looks over the man next to him.
Alex has his eyes closed, body relaxed against the curve of the tub wall, and legs bent at the knee. The tub’s jets are turned on, bubbles coursing up to disrupt the boxers the blond has on under the water.
The elder had insisted on not being naked, and Jack hadn't argued. He’s clad in boxers as well.
Jack faces forward again, eyes shifting down to read the time displaying on his iPod doc from where he’d set it up on the floor near the outlet opposite the tub. It’s pushing 4 in the morning, and if he’d been asked a few months ago how he thought he’d spend his Christmas morning this year, Jack wouldn't have even come close to being correct.
The song cuts out to be replaced by the next track on the album and Jack closes his eyes.
After another couple of minutes, by the time he can feel the water level creeping up to his chest, Jack sits up off of the wall to turn off the faucet.
“Do you believe in soul mates?” Alex asks then, eyes remaining closed.
Jack is quiet, considering the question for a bit. “I believe in you and me, if that’s what you mean.” He replies, turning his body so that he’s facing the blond, inching forward in the water the slightest to avoid hitting his back against the faucet.
“It’s not.” Alex states. He opens his eyes at that, sitting up as well. A small smile is offered to the younger, and then he’s elaborating. “I mean like – the whole, ‘one true love’ thing. Do you think that people are meant to be with certain people? Like there’s a match for everyone and everyone has a match. Destiny and the whole nine yards?”
“To be honest, I don’t know what I think.” Jack offers, shrugging to emphasize his lack of opinion.
Alex scoots back, relaxing his legs to cross in front of him, mimicking the younger’s position. He eyes Jack momentarily, and then drops his vision to his hands underwater. Jack had noticed over the years Alex’s draw to water. It relaxes the elder noticeably, and it’s the main reason why Jack had suggested taking a bath.
“I think –” Alex begins, pausing to pull his lip under his teeth briefly. “I think that the entire concept of soul mates is dumb.”
Jack raises an eyebrow, waiting until the elder lifts his head so that their eyes meet again before asking, “Why?”
It’s Alex’s turn to shrug then. “It just seems silly to me. Don’t get me wrong – I believe in real, true love and falling in love and all that, but only having one person that you’re destined to be with? It’s just unrealistic.
“Like, think of it this way – You've met how many people in your life… probably thousands, and you’ll probably meet at least a thousand more. And at any point in meeting them, you could have pursued a relationship, right? It all depends on your choices. Humans have so many choices that they make, and just one of those choices can change the entire course of their lives. It doesn't add up, the idea that everything you do in life is ‘meant to happen.’ I think a lot of it just happens, and your life turns out how you make it.”
“The same goes for relationships. They’re completely dependent on the choices that you make. And so, to me, soul mates don’t exist. You can end up with anyone, in theory, and still fall in love with them and live your life together. It just depends on who you choose and if both of you choose to make it work.”
He stops then, meeting the younger’s eyes and looking somewhat flustered, as if he hadn't meant to state all of that. “Does that makes sense?”
Jack nods, still taking in everything Alex had just said. “Yeah, it does. But I don’t completely agree with you.”
“Oh. Okay, Mr. I don’t know, do you have an opinion now?” Alex taunts, a smile playing at his lips as he looks at Jack.
The younger just laughs, replying honestly, “Maybe.”
When he doesn't actually explain though, the elder reaches forward, nudging his leg underwater as if to say go on then, prove me wrong.
Jack smiles, glad to see the other man relaxed enough to be like this with him. It’s been weeks now since he’s seen this side of Alex, and he’s relieved to see it’s still there. “I think it makes more sense, to me at least, to think of it, like, instead of having one set soul mate, you sort of choose your soul mates.”
The blond nods, and Jack continues, “I think there are people in life that you’re meant to be with. And maybe they aren't specific people, but more-or-less just people with certain characteristics that effect you. Like how they say everyone you meet is a lesson – I think that there are types of people you’re supposed to meet, and maybe fall in love with, in order to gain something from them.
But at the same time, I agree with you that destiny seems like a stupid concept when applied to real life. I think it’s just something people use to feel okay. Because if things are just ‘meant to happen,’ then they don’t have to feel guilty or responsible for them, y’know?”
Alex nods at the explanation and they both lapse into silence as High Dive comes on to fill in for the quiet.
It’s a few minutes before Jack speaks again, meeting the blonde’s eyes as he states, “I do believe that no matter what, despite all of the choices that I've made or didn't take, that I was meant to meet you.”
Alex just smiles at that, bottom lip finding place between his teeth for a moment before being released, and then he agrees, “Me too.”
-
“Trust me.” Jack says, offering his hand out for the elder to take.
Alex does, and despite the thick gloves both of them are wearing, the gesture still holds a lot of intimacy.
Seven is creeping up on them now, and their lack of sleep tonight has taken its toll. They make their way out of the apartment, Jack a step ahead of Alex to lead him wherever.
They take the elevator to the highest level of the building, and then Jack leads them over to the stairwell at the far end of the hallway, shouldering open the door to the landing. Alex pauses, eyeing the younger momentarily before realizing where he’s taking them.
He steps past the threshold, beginning to make his way up the steps before Jack follows, letting the door shut behind them. It quickly snuffs out the light the hallway had provided, and the space is plunged into black.
“Shit.” Alex hisses, instinctively reaching over for the banister.
Jack catches up to him, placing a cautious hand against his back as he reassures, “I’m right here.”
Alex holds still, letting his breathing even out and then reaches down to take Jack’s hand. The younger is surprised, but accepts it none-the-less. They continue slowly up the steps, feeling their way up the dark stairwell as best they can.
When they get to the top, Jack pushes open the door, pausing in the threshold and holding it open slightly to allow light to pass through. He turns to Alex, promising, “I know it’s freezing out, but I think the view should be worth it.”
The blond simply nods, stepping out onto the rooftop while Jack holds the door for him.
The air hits hard against his skin, and he’s glad that he put more than one layer on. It’s not snowing now, but there’s still dirty drifts and slush lining the streets below them from the previous days. The view isn't much now, aside from the familiar high rises around them, and the sky is a hazy blue. But Alex is well aware of how much the oncoming sunrise will change it.
Jack pulls him over to the edge of the rooftop, and Alex briefly considers that this isn’t the best place to bring a suicidal person, but he suppresses that thought quickly. They sit down, neither bothering to let go of the other’s hand, and they wait.
Alex watches as the sun rises, taking in the sky being brushed with layers of pinks and shades of blue against the bold orange surrounding the center. Jack stays beside him, and the blond is aware of how the younger is watching him instead of the sky, but he doesn’t care.
“Merry Christmas.” Jack says eventually, gripping the blonde’s hand a bit tighter.
When the cold finally pushes them in, the sky has evened out to a crisp winter blue, so transparent it almost looks white.
Alex has seen a lot of sunsets in his life, and yet somehow this one means something a bit more than the rest.
He lets Jack pull him up off of the concrete, following the younger back inside and down the stairs into the elevator. The warmth that immediately surrounds them upon entering the building has their cheeks flushing pink and pulls tired, yet content smiles onto both of their faces.
They return to the apartment, heading for the bedroom and peeling their layers of clothes off until they’re both just in boxers and t-shirts. The sheets are cold as they lie down to sleep, but Alex thinks it’s okay. Reaching across the space between them, he takes the younger’s hand once again.
♠ ♠ ♠
xx