So Much for Keeping This Just Friends

“Y’know Jack, I think that it’d be better for the band if we stayed just friends before this relationship goes too far. I love you but I’m afraid that if we ever break up, one day, it’s going to break up the band too.” Rian said, looking down at the ground almost as if he was ashamed of himself.

“Yeah, I understand. I was thinking the same. I love you too but this band means the world to me. It might be easier to forget you if we stop this now, before we get too involved.” Jack said, sadly. He loved Rian and didn’t want to break up with him but he also believed it was safer, so he couldn’t disagree with the drummer.

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This happened when Jack was 19, Rian being 20 at the time. 6 years later, they were having a lot of success with the band but Rian and Jack were still miserable without their other half. Sure, they were happy with where the band was, their dreams had finally came true but it seemed as if a hole had been left in their chests. Rian had been dating Cassadee for a few years and he thought he loved her but Jack was always on his mind. The guitarist couldn’t commit to a relationship like the drummer had done so, instead, he kept having one-night stands almost every night, thinking he might forget about Rian somewhere through all of this. It was easier too, it didn’t involve any responsibilities and he didn’t have to break anyone’s heart. At least, he thought he didn’t but every time Rian saw Jack with someone else, he could feel his already shattered heart breaking a little more. It was for this reason that Rian had to break up with Cassadee. He couldn’t keep forcing himself in a relationship that wasn’t exactly true. It hurt him but it also wasn’t fair for Cassadee. It was obvious that she loved Rian but the drummer just didn’t return the feelings. He couldn’t lead her on like this. He felt bad for breaking Cassadee’s heart so he tried to explain her that even after all these years, he couldn’t forget the skunk-haired guitarist. She seemed to understand and luckily, they stayed friends. Rian was glad, he didn’t love her but she was a good friend and he didn’t want to lose her. But maybe Cassadee understood more than Rian thought.

“You should tell him.” Cassadee had said. Rian seemed surprised but it was also clear in his expression that he didn’t want to tell Jack. “He loves you back. It’s obvious in the way he looks at you.” She said, smiling at Rian.

At first, Rian wasn’t sure if she wanted him to make a fool of himself or if she was serious but, by the look in her eyes, it was obvious that she only wanted him to be happy.

Here, he was, a week after, talking on the phone with Cassadee. He wanted to tell Jack today but he realized that he didn’t know how. After enough convincing from Cassadee, Rian got out of his bunk, finding Jack alone in the front lounge.

“Where are the others?” Rian asked.

“I don’t know, they went out a while ago.” Jack replied, focusing his attention on the TV instead of the drummer.

“Can I talk to you?” He asked, starting to become nervous.

“Yeah?” Jack said, unsure but finally looking at Rian, sensing the nervousness in the older boy’s voice.

“Just don’t interrupt me, please.” Rian said, sitting next to Jack but not looking at him. “You already know that I broke up with Cassadee like a week ago, I guess. Well, I did it because I didn’t love her. I love someone else, I always have and always will. As much as I tried to forget you for the past 6 years, Jack, I can’t. It’s impossible. You are the only person that I can love.” Rian admitted nervously.

“I’ve had so many one-night stands but no relationships, Rian.” Jack said after he was sure that Rian was done. “I couldn’t be in a relationship because I knew that I couldn’t love anyone but you. As much as I’d like to say that I’m over you, I’m not and I don’t think I’ll ever be.”

“I’m kind of happy with where we got with the band and the life I’m living but I can’t completely be happy without you. I think that the only way I’d be completely happy would be if you would accept to be my boyfriend.” Rian said hopefully.

“I can’t say I don’t want to because, honestly, I know it’d be the only way for me to be happy.” Jack said. Rian was looking at him, confused so the younger boy laughed softly and leant down to place a soft kiss on Rian’s lips. “That meant ‘yes’, you idiot.” Jack said when Rian looked at him still slightly confused. As soon as the words left Jack’s mouth, a smile spread across Rian’s face and he leapt forward on to Jack, wrapping his arms around his neck.