I Can Be Your Everything

"You've got to be havin' a laugh? I'm not human blah blah blah, are you fucking crazy!? Well of course you are! After everything you put me through", I wanted to slap Zack's face off. Does he think I'm that stupid? My fists clenched as my body stiffened.

"Don't even think about it", he obviously noticed my tightening fists. I let out a menacing laugh and took a step forward so our chests were nearly touching.

"Or what?", I was going to push the twat so I could get the chance to swing for him. He growled lowly.

"Don't push me Effie". Obviously I have to now. So I sharply shoved his shoulders but he never moved. He latched his hand onto my arm gripping it tightly, whispering lonely, "Keep pushing me baby and you'll see what happens", I ripped away from him.

"You're a fucking lunatic that's what you are", I waved my arms in the air madly, "I mean what the fuck is wrong with you people?", I looked over at Val as she stood in front of Matt and the other two. But her face was stone. She gave me no comfort, not sort of 'don't worry about it he's not thinking straight'. "Oh my god this is insane".

"Effie", Matt said sternly.

"No no no no, don't make me feel crazy, are you all listening to yourselves?". I felt cold and shaky, this was really upsetting me. Why are they continuing to try and trick me? They've put me through enough and I can't take it. This is breaking me but maybe I am the insane one. I've stayed here. I could have asked to go home but I couldn't bring myself to ask. As much as I hated Zack, as much as I ignored him and treated him like shit. I was totally besotted with him. I loved the feeling of his presence, the way his cologne smelled and especially waking up in his bed. I looked up into his eyes and he stared back, his eyes were so incredible, I couldn't believe how green they actually were. As innocent as they looked, I knew he wasn't. My mood switched almost instantly and my eyes began to well up with tears, "Why are you doing this to me? What did I do wrong?", Zack shifted onto one fit and crossed his arms. Nobody said anything, I sniffled and took a deep breath, staring at the floor, "I want to go home", I said quietly, "Please, I just need to go home"

"Ef no", Val sounded hurt by my words.

"Fine", My heart sank, part of me wanted him to beg me to stay to not let me go.

"Zacky!", My eyes were still fixated on the floor "You don't mean that what are you doing!", Her voice was cracking. I wiped my eyes and slowly walked towards her pulling her into a tight hug.

"What about my life Val? I'm at uni, I have bills to pay, and I have to some how get friends back" I mumbled into her shoulder.

"But I'm here for you I won't let anything happen again".

"What about my family? They haven't heard from me in ages, what are they going to be thinking. My mum will be worried sick".

"Matt do something", she wasn't accepting this. Zack turned his back on us and began walking away.
"Zacky!", he stopped in front of the stair case resting his hand on the banister.

"This is what she wants". Was it? I looked at Zack has he walked up the stairs away from me. My heart aching with every step he took. I needed to leave but I was beginning to have doubts about wanting to go. Val shook her head and left. Matt gave me half a smile.

"I'll take you home but I'm going to have to blind fold you", I shrugged, I didn't give a shit to be fair.

"Effie?" The short one asked.

"What?"

"What's your last name?", Brian scoffed,

"We know her last name idiot". I gave him a puzzled look. "It's Stewart right?" I shook my head.

"Ugh no, it's actually McLaren".

****

I felt the car stop.

"I can take this off now", I looked around me we were at the coffee shop where I first seen them when Steph was still in my life. I missed her so much. How could she leave me like this. It's went by so quickly. It feels like yesterday when I first saw Zacky. My heart ached just thinking about him. Matt continued driving until we reached my small apartment building. I looked over at him.

"It'll be okay", he said in some bid to ease me, he took my hand and held it in between his colossal hands, "Listen Ef I want you to know. I'm truly sorry for everything. I didn't think it would turn out the way it did and if I knew what to say to try make you stay with us I'd be saying those words now but I can't".

"It's sort of fucked up isn't it. You driving me back here all calm and collective just dropping me of as if nothing has happened".

"Definitely, I'll miss you kid"

"I'll miss you too", I leaned over and kissed his cheek and gave him a small hug then turned around opening the car door.

"Bye Matt",

"See you later Ef", I shut the door and watched him drive off. Something about his final words were unsettling and I was unsure of how to take them. I looked up the building and took quick steps the door unlocking it and running up the stairs to my door. I took a deep breath and tried the handle, opening it slowly. Jen sat on the couch with her head in the books, but stopped when she noticed me.

"Where the fuck have you been!", She stood up and engulfed me in a hug, "I have been worried sick, I swear if you've been on a coke bend for the past 3 weeks I'll murder you!", I let out a small laugh.

"Sorry I just lost track of time", I let her go and smiled at her.

"You look like shit",

"Ha funny, have you seen Steph?"

"Sometimes, she's going out with that David guy now, she seems pretty happy now actually. She never comes by or asks where you are. I think everyone assumes you've succumbed to your drug habits". She let out a loud laugh,

"Have any of my lecturers called?", She nodded.

"I told them you were seeing your parents, they aren't happy at all but they said because you were ahead of all your work and you've done most of modules you should be fine but you should go see them tomorrow and get everything sorted now go get a shower and get cleaned up and I'll order some food in". I looked around the flat, nothing had changed it even smelled the same. I then took my shoes off and headed for the bathroom, taking a slow hot shower making sure I couldn't smell him off my skin. I'd only been away for one hour but yet I couldn't help but feel depressed. I hated him for everything he done. Three very loud frightening knocks pulled me from my thoughts about Zack. My heart began pounding faster and I began to shake backing up against the wall.

"Effie come on foods here, you've been in there for a while now, hurry up you pruny bitch" it was only Jen, thank god. I mentally scolded myself and got out of the shower quickly towel drying myself and wrapping my hair in a towel. I wiped the condensation off of the mirror and stared at myself. I look ill, I was so pale and I had lost weight. My eyes no longer bright but a dull shade. I took another towel from the rack and made way for my room. It looked clean.

"I hope you don't mind I cleaned up a little", She popped her head through the door.

"Thanks it looks a lot better", I smiled a little at her.

"I put all your course work on the desk so don't freak". My room was hell of a lot cleaner that it did before. I raided through my doors trying to find my favourite pj's which hidden all the way at the back. Putting them on I headed to the kitchen.

"Hey Jen we should go to the salon so we can go get our nail and hair done", She nodded.

"Yes. You definitely need a change and by the way you look amazing all the drugs have made you look great", I just laughed, if only she knew the real reason. If only she knew I'd been hurt and torn apart mentally and been thrown about like a rag doll but some how I knew it wasn't over, the way Matt spoke and the fact they knew where I lived, it definitely not the end.