Status: I try to update once a week :) comment please
Letters
"I love you, Alan. I really do."
I went back home that night, only to found my boyfriend, Andrew, sitting on the couch.
He was slipping, fully clothed. I put my hand on his shoulder.
"Andrew?"
Slowly, his eyes opened.
"Zoey!" They went wide. "I'm so sorry for tonight, my boss wouldn't let me go!"
I blushed. "Really?"
"Yeah... I wish I could have come..."
"I'm so sorry..." I whispered.
He frowned. "Why?"
"I-I thought you ditched me" I said, staring at my shoes. "I went to the restaurant... With a guy"
He took a step back.
"You really don't trust me at all?"
I stayed silent. What could I say? I really believed he had ditched me.
He stared at me. "Is it really like this? You're a fucking whore, Zoey! A whore!" He screamed at me as he stood up, and left the house, banging the door.
I fell on the couch.
I was numb
My phone vibrated.
Tom Hansen:
We need to meet at IKEA tomorrow! :)
I stared. I felt like shit. I shouldn't continue to go with you, it would broke every chances to be back with Thomas.
But why do I want it so badly?
I stayed up in my bed all night. I missed him. We weren't really serious, but he had still been my boyfriend. We weren't living together, we weren't serious enough, but we had spare key of each other's apartment.
I stayed in bed for the whole morning, waiting for him to come. I had tried to call him, to text him. I felt too bad to go to his apartment. I would just be pathetic, and I would not be. I would not beg, never.
I took my phone to play some music. And I fell on your text. I looked at the clock. It was noon.
Zoey:
How about you pick me up at 3?
"So basically, we hang here playing like a cheesy couple, imagining things?" I asked you, unsure.
You nodded, with a smile. "Take my hand" I obeyed. You smiled. "Let's go!" You yelled as you started running, holding my hand through the store.
"Stop there Honey." I yelled. You did.
"Did you see something, Darling?"
"Actually, I did. Look, here's the perfect living room."
"Wow." You sat down on the couch. "This Ijahyts is pretty great." You said making up a stupid name that looked like the actual name of the couch.
"I agree." I said, sitting next to you.
"You can't even imagine all the dirty things I want to do on a oh so comfortable couch" you said, winking to me.
I punched you lightly on the shoulder.
"You're a pervert, Alan!" You shrugged and laughed. "It's not cheesy at all!"
"Shut up, I'm watching the game, woman!" You pointed at the TV screen.
I rolled my eyes at stood up.
"Mr Ashby, your children are waiting for you in the kitchen!" I told you.
"What?" You looked at me confused.
"Did you just forget our kids, you useless husband?"
You laughed. God, even back there I thought you had a perfect laugh.
"It seems that I did. Sorry I was... Too busy looking at your beauty."
"You're a awful liar, do you know it?"
"Yup, but I had to try!"
I laughed. "Anyway, your kids are still waiting for you."
"I'm gonna take them to bed." You said as you stood up. "Come with me?" I smiled and nodded.
We ran to the bedrooms.
"Ally, Tony, time to go to bed." You said.
People were looking at us, some with weird look, some with smile.
I was happy at this second. Andrew didn't came to my mind for the whole afternoon. With your craziness, and your smile, you took him out of my thought.
Around an hour later, you had became some old men reading news on a great armchair. I was just laying on a comfortable bed. I turned to my side, looking at the empty side next to me.
Andrew.
I felt tears coming to my eyes.
You spoke, but I have no idea what you said.
All I heard, was a worried "Zoey?". I sniffed. "Something happened?"
"A-Andrew broke up withe me" I said,fighting against my tears.
It took you some second to answer.
"How about we go take ice cream, then sit in the park next to this place, and you tell me?"
I nodded. I stood up, and you gently put your arm around me, with a sorry smile on your features.
We sat on the bench, our ice cream in our hands. It was a little cold outside, but not freezing. You put your arm around my shoulder.
"What happened?" You gently asked.
I ate a bit of my ice cream. It was way too cold to eat ice cream but I didn't care.
I told you about the discussion we had, the day before.
"I'm sorry..." I shrugged. "Did you talked to him, yet?"
I shook my head. "I don't want to go beg for him to stay."
"But, you don't want to loose him, right? If you don't do anything, he's just gonna go away from you."
"I know... I was planning on going to see him tonight."
"Good idea, I guess."
I nodded. "And you? Your love life?"
"Well, for me it is the same as sex life." You winked.
"Gosh, can you stop talking about sex?"
"I'm a 18 years old boy, what else can I do?"
I rolled my eyes.
"To answer your question, I just don't want a relationship."
"Are you doing the same speech as Zoey Deschanel in the movie?" I smiled.
"No, I'm not. I'm not saying like 'love don't exist' or stuff like that, I'm just saying 'not now'. I need to stay concentrate on my music, now. And fuck, night stands are fucking great!"
Even then, I knew you were lying. But I smiled to you. I reality, you were too hurt because of your last girlfriend. Music was just a way to concentrate on something else. But I didn't say a word about this: as you said, you were a 18 years old boy who wanted to be the cool guy people liked.
"I don't really like the idea of night stand. I mean, for me sex is a way to say to the other that you love him or her. I don't really see how you can do this with a stranger."
"You loved every guy you were with?" You asked, almost shocked.
"Yeah, obviously. I would have been with them, if I didn't."
"How can you? I mean, love doesn't happen every morning. You can't fall in love a hundred times in your life. Once, or twice maybe." You were looking before you, eyes in the vague. "Maybe you can believe you love them when you don't."
I stayed silent as I thought about what you said.
"Maybe, but I think I love Andrew."
"I don't think so."
I rose an eyebrow. "Why that?"
"If you loved him, you would be after him, right now, trying to get him back, you wouldn't be with me. Not that I'm complaining." You smiled.
I looked up. "Maybe, but he's still my boyfriend, and I still want to be with him. Even with his flaws."
"That's what I don't understand." You told me. "Why do you want to stay with him if you don't love him? Are you so scared of being alone? Being alone is fun. You can do whatever you want, and nobody complains."
"But I love coming home and find his smiling face. I love how he makes me smile. I love all those details that happens just when you're with someone."
"I like more being free."
I shrugged. We stayed silent for a while.
"If you want to see him, you should go."
I nodded, and stood up.
"I had a great afternoon. Thanks Alan. See you."
You smiled to me and nodded goodbye. ***
I remembered that day. I think I started to fall for her at that moment. She was so sweet, beautiful, smart...
***
I walked to his house, and saw another car parked. I knocked at the door. A guy covered in tattoos opened the door.
"I'm pretty sure you don't want to go in." He told me.
I frowned. "What? Who are you?"
"A friend of Andrew. And you?"
"His girlfriend." I said as walked in. The guy stopped me.
"Then you really don't want to go in."
"What the fuck, leave me!"
"No."
I looked at him. He was really tall, and had his right arm covered in tattoo. He was wearing a beanie, but I could see that he had dark hair.
That's when I hear it. A scream. Of pleasure. That came from a girl. A second after I heard a "harder baby" being scream by the same voice.
I froze. "Andrew" I whispered. The guy pulled me out of the house and closed the door.
"We should go." He said.
"No." I said. He rose an eyebrow.
I walked inside the house, and to the bedroom. The guy was a few feet behind me, wondering what I was doing. I threw the door open. The two froze, then his behind the cover.
"What-what are you doing here?" He asked me.
"I was going to try to get you back, explaining that nothing happened between me and that guy, but I guess it doesn't matter now."
"That's your girlfriend?" The girl asked, looking at me from head to toes. "I understands why you cheated."
To be honest, it hurt. A lot. But I stayed still, like it was nothing.
"Well, bye bastard. I hope you're gonna have many ugly babies." I said walking away. The guy followed me. I stopped once outside. He was smiling.
"You wanna go drink something?" He asked. I nodded.
We walked to his car, and went in. Once in, he started the car. We stopped in the nearest bar. We sit at a table.
"Can I ask a friend to come?" I asked him
He rose an eyebrow. "Sure you don't have to ask." I smiled.
I nodded and took out my phone. I called you. I have no idea why. I mean, I had closer friend, that I could call, but no I called you.
You answered quickly.
"Hey, Zoey, shouldn't you be talking with Andrew?"
"Yeah but.... He... He was..." My mouth didn't wanted to say it.
"Where are you?" You asked worried.
"In a bar, with a guy."
Silence.
"With a guy?"
"Yeah, he was at Andrew's house and... He took me there"
"Why are you calling?" You asked, anger in your voice.
I frowned. "I-I don't really know... Just...can you come?"
"I'm coming." I told you the name of the bar, and you hung up.
"It was the guy you were talking about, at Andrew's?" The guy in front of me asked.
I nodded. He smiled wide. I had to say that he was hot. He was just wearing a shirt, but his tattoos seemed nice. His whole body seemed nice. And he had a cute smile.
"You're not going to stay alone and sad long." He said.
I frowned. "What are you talking about?"
"Nothing."
"Tell me!"
"No."
"Please."
"No."
I turned on my side, pouting. He laughed.
That's when I saw you walking here. I had a hot guy in front of me, but you... You were way hotter. I liked everything in the way you looked. And for what I knew, you were a great guy.
I stood up, and walked to you. You were about to say hello, but I cut you by kissing you. Just for a second. Then I pulled away. Your eyes were huge.
"Sorry I just needed to kiss someone else than Andrew."
You smiled." If you want to do other stuff with someone else than him, I'm here." You winked, pointing at our body.
I smacked your arm. "You pervert"
"Sorry, I can't change the way I was made." You winked.
I rolled my eyes, and led you to the table we were sitting.
"So Alan, this is..." I stopped. "Shit I don't even know your name."
He smiled, holding his hand out for you to shake. "Austin."
"Alan" you said, shaking hands.
You sat next to me, but you were staring at him.
"Aren't you Austin Carlile, from Of Mice And Men?" You asked. My eyes went wide.
"I am."
"You're a musician?"
He nodded. "Singer... Well, I scream more than anything, but yeah."
I smiled wide. "That's amazing!"
You rolled your eyes, annoyed. "There's a hundred of front mans." You signed.
I smacked your arm again. "You're mean Alan. I'm sorry Austin"
You looked away.
"Is the band famous, or anything?" I asked, trying to put an end on the cold you threw in the conversation.
"Yeah we are!" He said, smile on his lips.
"That's amazing! I need to go listen!"
"Sure" Austin said with a big smile.
"Well, I came here because you seemed down, but since you're good, I can go home, right?" You said, as you started to stood up, but I took your arm before. You looked at me. My smiled disappeared. I didn't wanted you to go. Even if it was stupid. I had no right to tell you to stay with me, if you wanted to go. But I didn't wanted you to go.
I saw the hurt flash in your eyes, but didn't understood it. You smiled and sat back down next to me. I turned to Austin, who was smiling, drinking his beer.
Now, thinking about that moment, I guess your feelings were a bit obvious, and maybe even mine. But I didn't see it. I didn't even suspected it. I guess I was just stupid.
"What were you doing at Andrew's?" You asked, not so pleased to be there.
"He's a friend of my wife and I, and we wanted to invite him to do something with us." He shrugged.
"You're married?" I asked a bit shocked. He nodded. You relaxed next to me. "But you're so young?"
"And you're even younger" He winked at me.
"I guess you're right. You never doubted your choice?"
"You always doubt. You just have to know if the doubts are worth it." He smiled warmly.
At this moment, I barely knew him, but I already admired him for his way to think.
"And you two? What are you doing into your lives?" Austin asked.
"I'm in university. I'm studying accounting."
Austin stared at me. "It seems... Absolutely awful"
I laughed. "It isn't. But it's not as amazing as you two, that's for sure."
Austin rose an eyebrow. "What're you doin', man?"
"Music, guitar." It was like you wanted to say the least words you could.
"That's amazing! You're in a band? What kind?"
"Metal, hardcore, call it as you want. Not far away from yours. And no, no band for now. The old one kicked me out."
Austin laughed a bit. "Why that?" I asked.
You turned to me. "I was to much 'Music and Girls' and not enough 'Music and Drugs' for them." you winked.
I punched your shoulder. "Do you always think about sex?"
"Not all the time. I think about girls, too." I rolled my eyes at you, and you laughed. "See things in a good way: i'm not getting high all the time, I'm getting laid. Way less dangerous."
"Until you'll get some random STD."
Austin laughed, and high fived me. You signed and turned your back to me. I rolled my eyes.
"You know, the more I know you, the more I think you're 3 years old, in reality."
You turned to me, with a shocked look. "Well, I didn't know 3 years old used to talk about sex most of the time. The 3 years old you've met are really... forwards."
"As much as you're a retard.".
"Okay, that one was good."
"That's not the only thing that's good." I winked at you. You rose an eyebrow. "What, I can't do the same jokes as you?"
You smiled. "Sure you can. That's hot."
I rolled my eyes. I suddenly remembered that Austin was still in front of us. I blushed and turned to him, who was smiling, holding his phone into his hands.
"Why are you smiling?" I asked.
"Oh, nothing." He shrugged, and put his phone back in his pocket. "Can I know since how many time you two know each other?"
"What time is it?" I asked.
"7:30." You told me.
"Then we know each other for 23 hours and something. I don't exactly know. Why?"
He rose an eyebrow. "You guys seem to know each other for a long time."
I just shrugged, not understanding what he was truly saying.
He told me long time after, as we were already together that he knew the first time he saw us, that we will become something. He guessed something strong was going to appears between us. And I guess he was right.
You're at the band practice, right now. That's why I'm writing, if you were with me I wouldn't. You're planning on making a 3rd record. I really hope I will listen to it. I hope we will be together at that moment. But I somehow know we wont. I'm so sorry, Alan.
***
There was tear drop on the paper, and even if I was crying, by now, they weren't mine.
***But It is not the moment to explain anything. I told you, I want to explain what I am going to do (I know for you I already did), and if I told you right now, you would probably not understand. It's better to explain from the start.
I love you, Alan. I really do.
He was slipping, fully clothed. I put my hand on his shoulder.
"Andrew?"
Slowly, his eyes opened.
"Zoey!" They went wide. "I'm so sorry for tonight, my boss wouldn't let me go!"
I blushed. "Really?"
"Yeah... I wish I could have come..."
"I'm so sorry..." I whispered.
He frowned. "Why?"
"I-I thought you ditched me" I said, staring at my shoes. "I went to the restaurant... With a guy"
He took a step back.
"You really don't trust me at all?"
I stayed silent. What could I say? I really believed he had ditched me.
He stared at me. "Is it really like this? You're a fucking whore, Zoey! A whore!" He screamed at me as he stood up, and left the house, banging the door.
I fell on the couch.
I was numb
My phone vibrated.
Tom Hansen:
We need to meet at IKEA tomorrow! :)
I stared. I felt like shit. I shouldn't continue to go with you, it would broke every chances to be back with Thomas.
But why do I want it so badly?
I stayed up in my bed all night. I missed him. We weren't really serious, but he had still been my boyfriend. We weren't living together, we weren't serious enough, but we had spare key of each other's apartment.
I stayed in bed for the whole morning, waiting for him to come. I had tried to call him, to text him. I felt too bad to go to his apartment. I would just be pathetic, and I would not be. I would not beg, never.
I took my phone to play some music. And I fell on your text. I looked at the clock. It was noon.
Zoey:
How about you pick me up at 3?
"So basically, we hang here playing like a cheesy couple, imagining things?" I asked you, unsure.
You nodded, with a smile. "Take my hand" I obeyed. You smiled. "Let's go!" You yelled as you started running, holding my hand through the store.
"Stop there Honey." I yelled. You did.
"Did you see something, Darling?"
"Actually, I did. Look, here's the perfect living room."
"Wow." You sat down on the couch. "This Ijahyts is pretty great." You said making up a stupid name that looked like the actual name of the couch.
"I agree." I said, sitting next to you.
"You can't even imagine all the dirty things I want to do on a oh so comfortable couch" you said, winking to me.
I punched you lightly on the shoulder.
"You're a pervert, Alan!" You shrugged and laughed. "It's not cheesy at all!"
"Shut up, I'm watching the game, woman!" You pointed at the TV screen.
I rolled my eyes at stood up.
"Mr Ashby, your children are waiting for you in the kitchen!" I told you.
"What?" You looked at me confused.
"Did you just forget our kids, you useless husband?"
You laughed. God, even back there I thought you had a perfect laugh.
"It seems that I did. Sorry I was... Too busy looking at your beauty."
"You're a awful liar, do you know it?"
"Yup, but I had to try!"
I laughed. "Anyway, your kids are still waiting for you."
"I'm gonna take them to bed." You said as you stood up. "Come with me?" I smiled and nodded.
We ran to the bedrooms.
"Ally, Tony, time to go to bed." You said.
People were looking at us, some with weird look, some with smile.
I was happy at this second. Andrew didn't came to my mind for the whole afternoon. With your craziness, and your smile, you took him out of my thought.
Around an hour later, you had became some old men reading news on a great armchair. I was just laying on a comfortable bed. I turned to my side, looking at the empty side next to me.
Andrew.
I felt tears coming to my eyes.
You spoke, but I have no idea what you said.
All I heard, was a worried "Zoey?". I sniffed. "Something happened?"
"A-Andrew broke up withe me" I said,fighting against my tears.
It took you some second to answer.
"How about we go take ice cream, then sit in the park next to this place, and you tell me?"
I nodded. I stood up, and you gently put your arm around me, with a sorry smile on your features.
We sat on the bench, our ice cream in our hands. It was a little cold outside, but not freezing. You put your arm around my shoulder.
"What happened?" You gently asked.
I ate a bit of my ice cream. It was way too cold to eat ice cream but I didn't care.
I told you about the discussion we had, the day before.
"I'm sorry..." I shrugged. "Did you talked to him, yet?"
I shook my head. "I don't want to go beg for him to stay."
"But, you don't want to loose him, right? If you don't do anything, he's just gonna go away from you."
"I know... I was planning on going to see him tonight."
"Good idea, I guess."
I nodded. "And you? Your love life?"
"Well, for me it is the same as sex life." You winked.
"Gosh, can you stop talking about sex?"
"I'm a 18 years old boy, what else can I do?"
I rolled my eyes.
"To answer your question, I just don't want a relationship."
"Are you doing the same speech as Zoey Deschanel in the movie?" I smiled.
"No, I'm not. I'm not saying like 'love don't exist' or stuff like that, I'm just saying 'not now'. I need to stay concentrate on my music, now. And fuck, night stands are fucking great!"
Even then, I knew you were lying. But I smiled to you. I reality, you were too hurt because of your last girlfriend. Music was just a way to concentrate on something else. But I didn't say a word about this: as you said, you were a 18 years old boy who wanted to be the cool guy people liked.
"I don't really like the idea of night stand. I mean, for me sex is a way to say to the other that you love him or her. I don't really see how you can do this with a stranger."
"You loved every guy you were with?" You asked, almost shocked.
"Yeah, obviously. I would have been with them, if I didn't."
"How can you? I mean, love doesn't happen every morning. You can't fall in love a hundred times in your life. Once, or twice maybe." You were looking before you, eyes in the vague. "Maybe you can believe you love them when you don't."
I stayed silent as I thought about what you said.
"Maybe, but I think I love Andrew."
"I don't think so."
I rose an eyebrow. "Why that?"
"If you loved him, you would be after him, right now, trying to get him back, you wouldn't be with me. Not that I'm complaining." You smiled.
I looked up. "Maybe, but he's still my boyfriend, and I still want to be with him. Even with his flaws."
"That's what I don't understand." You told me. "Why do you want to stay with him if you don't love him? Are you so scared of being alone? Being alone is fun. You can do whatever you want, and nobody complains."
"But I love coming home and find his smiling face. I love how he makes me smile. I love all those details that happens just when you're with someone."
"I like more being free."
I shrugged. We stayed silent for a while.
"If you want to see him, you should go."
I nodded, and stood up.
"I had a great afternoon. Thanks Alan. See you."
You smiled to me and nodded goodbye. ***
I remembered that day. I think I started to fall for her at that moment. She was so sweet, beautiful, smart...
***
I walked to his house, and saw another car parked. I knocked at the door. A guy covered in tattoos opened the door.
"I'm pretty sure you don't want to go in." He told me.
I frowned. "What? Who are you?"
"A friend of Andrew. And you?"
"His girlfriend." I said as walked in. The guy stopped me.
"Then you really don't want to go in."
"What the fuck, leave me!"
"No."
I looked at him. He was really tall, and had his right arm covered in tattoo. He was wearing a beanie, but I could see that he had dark hair.
That's when I hear it. A scream. Of pleasure. That came from a girl. A second after I heard a "harder baby" being scream by the same voice.
I froze. "Andrew" I whispered. The guy pulled me out of the house and closed the door.
"We should go." He said.
"No." I said. He rose an eyebrow.
I walked inside the house, and to the bedroom. The guy was a few feet behind me, wondering what I was doing. I threw the door open. The two froze, then his behind the cover.
"What-what are you doing here?" He asked me.
"I was going to try to get you back, explaining that nothing happened between me and that guy, but I guess it doesn't matter now."
"That's your girlfriend?" The girl asked, looking at me from head to toes. "I understands why you cheated."
To be honest, it hurt. A lot. But I stayed still, like it was nothing.
"Well, bye bastard. I hope you're gonna have many ugly babies." I said walking away. The guy followed me. I stopped once outside. He was smiling.
"You wanna go drink something?" He asked. I nodded.
We walked to his car, and went in. Once in, he started the car. We stopped in the nearest bar. We sit at a table.
"Can I ask a friend to come?" I asked him
He rose an eyebrow. "Sure you don't have to ask." I smiled.
I nodded and took out my phone. I called you. I have no idea why. I mean, I had closer friend, that I could call, but no I called you.
You answered quickly.
"Hey, Zoey, shouldn't you be talking with Andrew?"
"Yeah but.... He... He was..." My mouth didn't wanted to say it.
"Where are you?" You asked worried.
"In a bar, with a guy."
Silence.
"With a guy?"
"Yeah, he was at Andrew's house and... He took me there"
"Why are you calling?" You asked, anger in your voice.
I frowned. "I-I don't really know... Just...can you come?"
"I'm coming." I told you the name of the bar, and you hung up.
"It was the guy you were talking about, at Andrew's?" The guy in front of me asked.
I nodded. He smiled wide. I had to say that he was hot. He was just wearing a shirt, but his tattoos seemed nice. His whole body seemed nice. And he had a cute smile.
"You're not going to stay alone and sad long." He said.
I frowned. "What are you talking about?"
"Nothing."
"Tell me!"
"No."
"Please."
"No."
I turned on my side, pouting. He laughed.
That's when I saw you walking here. I had a hot guy in front of me, but you... You were way hotter. I liked everything in the way you looked. And for what I knew, you were a great guy.
I stood up, and walked to you. You were about to say hello, but I cut you by kissing you. Just for a second. Then I pulled away. Your eyes were huge.
"Sorry I just needed to kiss someone else than Andrew."
You smiled." If you want to do other stuff with someone else than him, I'm here." You winked, pointing at our body.
I smacked your arm. "You pervert"
"Sorry, I can't change the way I was made." You winked.
I rolled my eyes, and led you to the table we were sitting.
"So Alan, this is..." I stopped. "Shit I don't even know your name."
He smiled, holding his hand out for you to shake. "Austin."
"Alan" you said, shaking hands.
You sat next to me, but you were staring at him.
"Aren't you Austin Carlile, from Of Mice And Men?" You asked. My eyes went wide.
"I am."
"You're a musician?"
He nodded. "Singer... Well, I scream more than anything, but yeah."
I smiled wide. "That's amazing!"
You rolled your eyes, annoyed. "There's a hundred of front mans." You signed.
I smacked your arm again. "You're mean Alan. I'm sorry Austin"
You looked away.
"Is the band famous, or anything?" I asked, trying to put an end on the cold you threw in the conversation.
"Yeah we are!" He said, smile on his lips.
"That's amazing! I need to go listen!"
"Sure" Austin said with a big smile.
"Well, I came here because you seemed down, but since you're good, I can go home, right?" You said, as you started to stood up, but I took your arm before. You looked at me. My smiled disappeared. I didn't wanted you to go. Even if it was stupid. I had no right to tell you to stay with me, if you wanted to go. But I didn't wanted you to go.
I saw the hurt flash in your eyes, but didn't understood it. You smiled and sat back down next to me. I turned to Austin, who was smiling, drinking his beer.
Now, thinking about that moment, I guess your feelings were a bit obvious, and maybe even mine. But I didn't see it. I didn't even suspected it. I guess I was just stupid.
"What were you doing at Andrew's?" You asked, not so pleased to be there.
"He's a friend of my wife and I, and we wanted to invite him to do something with us." He shrugged.
"You're married?" I asked a bit shocked. He nodded. You relaxed next to me. "But you're so young?"
"And you're even younger" He winked at me.
"I guess you're right. You never doubted your choice?"
"You always doubt. You just have to know if the doubts are worth it." He smiled warmly.
At this moment, I barely knew him, but I already admired him for his way to think.
"And you two? What are you doing into your lives?" Austin asked.
"I'm in university. I'm studying accounting."
Austin stared at me. "It seems... Absolutely awful"
I laughed. "It isn't. But it's not as amazing as you two, that's for sure."
Austin rose an eyebrow. "What're you doin', man?"
"Music, guitar." It was like you wanted to say the least words you could.
"That's amazing! You're in a band? What kind?"
"Metal, hardcore, call it as you want. Not far away from yours. And no, no band for now. The old one kicked me out."
Austin laughed a bit. "Why that?" I asked.
You turned to me. "I was to much 'Music and Girls' and not enough 'Music and Drugs' for them." you winked.
I punched your shoulder. "Do you always think about sex?"
"Not all the time. I think about girls, too." I rolled my eyes at you, and you laughed. "See things in a good way: i'm not getting high all the time, I'm getting laid. Way less dangerous."
"Until you'll get some random STD."
Austin laughed, and high fived me. You signed and turned your back to me. I rolled my eyes.
"You know, the more I know you, the more I think you're 3 years old, in reality."
You turned to me, with a shocked look. "Well, I didn't know 3 years old used to talk about sex most of the time. The 3 years old you've met are really... forwards."
"As much as you're a retard.".
"Okay, that one was good."
"That's not the only thing that's good." I winked at you. You rose an eyebrow. "What, I can't do the same jokes as you?"
You smiled. "Sure you can. That's hot."
I rolled my eyes. I suddenly remembered that Austin was still in front of us. I blushed and turned to him, who was smiling, holding his phone into his hands.
"Why are you smiling?" I asked.
"Oh, nothing." He shrugged, and put his phone back in his pocket. "Can I know since how many time you two know each other?"
"What time is it?" I asked.
"7:30." You told me.
"Then we know each other for 23 hours and something. I don't exactly know. Why?"
He rose an eyebrow. "You guys seem to know each other for a long time."
I just shrugged, not understanding what he was truly saying.
He told me long time after, as we were already together that he knew the first time he saw us, that we will become something. He guessed something strong was going to appears between us. And I guess he was right.
You're at the band practice, right now. That's why I'm writing, if you were with me I wouldn't. You're planning on making a 3rd record. I really hope I will listen to it. I hope we will be together at that moment. But I somehow know we wont. I'm so sorry, Alan.
***
There was tear drop on the paper, and even if I was crying, by now, they weren't mine.
***But It is not the moment to explain anything. I told you, I want to explain what I am going to do (I know for you I already did), and if I told you right now, you would probably not understand. It's better to explain from the start.
I love you, Alan. I really do.
♠ ♠ ♠
Here it is! Just to clarify: every sentence between " *** " are what Alan, who is reading the story, thinking.(that's why it is in another front). I just wanted to be sure you understood.Anyway, have a nice day :)