A New Life

-Charlie-
“I’m so proud of you.” I say, smiling at the handsome man in front of me.
“I did it for you, my love.” He says, pressing a kiss to my forehead. “And for my two loves inside you.”
“You’re amazing.”

He smiles and leans farther down to kiss my lips.

"Here it is. For you and the girls."

He hands me a puck. The puck. I smile at it. At him. While I didn't really care if he got it or not (other than the fact that it was my husband scoring a hat trick) I know how badly he wanted this. He wanted to get one goal for each of the three women in his life. Not including his mother, of course.

“Before we go to sleep, I have to pee.” I say as Sean pulls his suit off and hangs it up in the closet. He turns and gives me a smile.

“Do you want me to carry you or just help you?” He asks.
“I never put my prosthetic on anymore, so I guess carry.” I respond.

He comes over to the side of the bed and helps me sit up and drape my legs over the edge. He then wraps my arms around his shoulders and grabs above my knees, lifting me from the bed. He takes me to the bathroom, and gets me situated on the toilet.

“I’m going to put on sweatpants.” He says. “I’ll be back in a second. Don’t try to get up without me.”
“I know the drill.” I smile.
“Just making sure.” He laughs.
“Get out so I can pee!” I lightly shove his shoulder.

He smiles again and heads back out to our room so I can relieve myself. As I stretch to reach for the toilet paper when I’m done, I feel a sharp pain in my lower stomach. I wince and groan, grabbing at my bump. My eyes squeeze shut.

“Babe?” Sean asks from the bedroom, hearing my groan.
I whimper. It suddenly hurts so bad.
“Charlie?” His voice is panicked and I hear him rushing into the bathroom. “Baby are you okay?”

I whimper again, still unable to say anything.

“What’s on your hand? Oh, fuck.” He says, grabbing the hand that’s clenched on my stomach. “Oh my god, Charlie. You’re bleeding.”

I crack my eyes open and look at my hand. He’s right. Why am I bleeding? Fuck, why am I bleeding?

I start to cry, a combination of pain and pure terror.

“It hurts.” I sob.
“Oh my god, baby.” Sean says, grasping my shoulder and knee with his hands. “Hold on, I’ll be right back.”

He rushes out of the room and comes back seconds later, pulling a shirt over his head and typing away on his phone. I grab his hand and sob.

I hear the ring from his phone before I realize he’s calling someone.

“Hello?” The woman answers.

“Dr. Roberts, it’s Sean Couturier.” He blurts out. “Charlie is bleeding.”
I hear a small rustle from the other line.
“She’s bleeding?” She asks.
“Yes.” He confirms.
“A lot?”
“It looks like a lot.”
“Get her to the hospital right now. I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.” She says.

He hangs up and tosses his phone into his pocket.

“Come on, baby. We’re going to the hospital.” He says.

I can tell Sean is scared completely shitless as he pulls my sweatpants up. He picks me up into his arms and carries me out to the Range Rover. He carefully straps me into the passenger seat and rushes around to the driver’s side.

“Drive fast.” I whimper.
“Don’t worry, baby. I will.” He responds.

I want to grab his hand, but I know he needs both on the steering wheel with the speed that he’s driving at. So I rest my hand on his thigh instead. He calls his parents, Drew, and Brayden on the way over there. Fortunately his parents haven’t boarded their plane yet, and Drew is only an hour away. Brayden agrees to let the team know, but Sean asks him to tell them all to stay home. They just played a game and it’s kinda late. Everyone needs their rest. All three parties say they’ll be at the hospital soon.

“Hang on, love.” He says.

We make it to the hospital in just under ten minutes, probably a record. When we get there, Sean pulls right up to the front door and hops out. One of the nurses standing outside rushes over with a wheelchair.

“She’s bleeding. Our doctor said she’ll meet us here.” Sean says, getting me into the wheelchair.
“Dr. Roberts?” She asks.
“Yeah.”
“She just called. She’s seconds away. She said to get you right into an operating room and start a full inspection. How far along is she?”
“Almost thirty one weeks.” He responds.

The pain is overwhelming and I focus on the feeling of Sean’s hand on my arm as I’m wheeled into the hospital. I can’t focus on anything other than the pain and Sean. I start to fade out and vaguely recognize being lifted onto a table. I feel poking and prodding against my stomach and cry out.

“Do you know what’s going on?” I hear Sean ask.
“I’m not completely sure.” The nurse responds. “But I don’t know her history. Dr. Roberts should be here soon.”

She starts preparing me for whatever they’re going to do while another nurse tries to stop the incessant bleeding and Dr. Roberts comes rushing into the room.

“Charlie. Sean. Let’s figure out what’s going on.” She says in her professional tone.

The next I’m not really sure how long is a blur, filled with pain and rushing bodies. I try to focus on the one unwavering thing in the room- Sean standing next to me, holding my hand.

“Charlie, it looks like your uterus has ripped.” Dr. Roberts finally says after what feels like a lifetime. It was probably only a couple seconds. “We’re going to have to take you in right now for an emergency cesarian section.”

My heart starts racing, and the monitor they put on me picks it up, broadcasting it to the room. Sean grips my hand tightly.

“I know this is scary, but I’m going to need you to relax as best as you can, Charlie. The more you get worked up about it, the more chance we have of running into any further complications.” She says.

In that moment, my brilliant husband starts talking to me. He starts telling me everything- from the first time he ever met me, to the time when he realized he was in love with me. He jokes about telling me he loved me before my first deployment. Mainly, he tells me how much he loves me now, and his plans for our future. For our girls’ future. His words relax me, and my heart rate slows back to a somewhat normal pace.

I’m quickly moved to an operating room and Sean is changed into scrubs so he can stay with me. This is it. This is the moment we’ve both been anxiously waiting for. We’re about to be parents.

I’d be ridiculously excited if I wasn’t so absolutely terrified right now.

“Your girls will end like they did.” He points to the left and I see the five children I failed to save. “Or you will.” He shrugs. “Your husband? He will suffer heartache like never before. He will break into a million pieces, unable to do anything but sit back and watch the love of his life and his daughters struggle for their lives.”

“It’s either you or them. You’ll know when you get to that moment. You’ll know when you have to make your choice. Do you give your husband the daughters he deserves? Or do you make the selfish decision and save your own life, killing the only chance Sean has to have a child with you?”

My body is weak. I can’t- I can’t fight it any longer. I know this is that time. It’s the time that I have to make my decision.

“Dr. Roberts.” I call weakly.
“Yes, Charlie?” She answers.
“They’re the main priority.” I demand.

Sean’s face goes white. We’ve barely talked about my fears since the whole issue with Anne happened. But I need her to know what’s going on. I need them both to know what I want.

These things we do, that others may live.

It doesn't just apply to when we're on deployment. It doesn't just apply to when we're still in active duty. A Pararescue Jumper is always selfless when considering someone else's life.

She nods and disappears from my line of vision. I feel a slight prick in my stomach and hear the sound of bodies frantically moving around. The beeping of the machines start to pick up. I start to feel light headed and my vision goes fuzzy. My grip on Sean’s hand lightens.

“She’s bleeding too much. Find the source of the bleeding and stop it.” I hear.

“Charlie, baby. Stay with me.” Sean begs as my eyes fight to stay open.

I hear a rush of blood in my ears.

“Charlie. Please, my love.” I hear.
“I love you.” I whisper to him.

Suddenly the room is filled with the sound of a baby crying. My baby crying. A tear slips out of my eye. She sounds beautiful. Another cry enters the room a couple minutes later. I want to see them just one time, but Dr. Roberts tells a nurse to take them to get cleaned up.

When they leave, the room feels dead silent. In the back of my mind I can hear that it’s not. I can hear the frantic beeping of the machines attached to me. I can hear the nurses and Dr. Roberts moving and working, still discussing the bleeding. I can hear Sean’s sobs and frantic pleads for me to stay with him. Not to go anywhere. But I don’t have any control over that. I made my decision.

I chose my girls. Sean’s girls. I chose them.

I force my fingers to lightly squeeze Sean’s hand and let my muscles relax. My eyes close, and everything goes dark.