A New Life

-Sean-
I’m in the middle of changing Charlie’s clothes when the daytime nurse pokes her head in, letting me know that we have a visitor. I finish putting my wife’s pants on her and open the door.

On the other side, I find my general manager and coach.

“Hey guys. What’s up?” I ask, letting them into the room.

They both take a long look at Charlie, lying in the bed.

“We’ve come to see how you are doing.” Ron says. “And we need to talk to you.”
“Sure.” I respond.
“Sean, I think you know why we’re here.” Chief says.
I think for a second, and then it hits me.
“My health.” I state.

Both men nod.

“Sean, the entire organization is starting to get really worried about you.” Chief says, getting right into it. “The team is worried, the coaching staff is worried, everyone.”

I nod.

“Sean, I really just wanted to make it known that we need you to start taking better care of yourself.” Ron says. “The majority of the management and coaching staff sees you as the number one candidate for our next captain once Giroux is gone. You’ve got the on-ice presence. You’ve got the work ethic. You’ve got the good report with the referees. And your teammates seem to genuinely enjoy your presence, and listen to what you have to say in the locker room and on the ice.”

This confession is a surprise to me, and I’m sure that’s obvious on my face when I look up at him with my eyes wide.

“When my twins were born, they were also born early. And they were both really small.” Chief says. “Granted, I didn’t have to go through nearly as much complications as you have. But I understand why you’re having a hard time right now. It’s rough seeing your children so helpless like that.”

“But you can’t give up on yourself right now.” Ron finishes.

I’m still somewhat stunned at his earlier comment, but I understand what they’re saying. I need to get my shit together. Now.

“I-I didn’t... I never meant to worry anyone, honestly.” I say. “I realized that it was an issue. But I didn’t really think about how much it was impacting everyone else. I’m truly sorry for that.”

“Promise us right now that you’re going to do better. It’s not just us who need you to take care of yourself, you know.”
“I do know. I promise I’ll start to do better.”
The two give me small smiles and they look somewhat proud.
“Good. You can start off by going home for tonight. Take a shower, get a good night’s sleep, eat a healthy meal. Then you can come in early and get a workout in before you come here.”

My face pales.

“But who will be here with Charlie? With my girls?”
“Your parents and Charlie’s brother have agreed that you need this. And we know you trust them with being here while you’re not.”
“Okay.”

I try to wrap my head around what they’re telling me to do. I have to leave the hospital tonight. After a week here, I actually have to get in my car and go somewhere else. Sure, that sounds like a good idea. I would kill for a shower and to sleep in my own bed. But my wife is in a coma and my daughters are in the intensive care unit. What if Charlie wakes up? What if she takes a turn for the worse? What if my babies need me?

“Your family will be here, Sean.” Chief assures me, reading the fear on my face. “If anything happens, I promise you’ll be the first person they call.”

He’s right. They both are. I know my parents and Drew will take good care of my girls. And if something does happen, they’ll call me immediately. I thank them both for the wake up call and shake their hands as they leave.

Once they do, I give my mom a call.

“Sean, darling. Is everything okay?” She answers.
“Everything’s the same, mom.” I respond. “But I have a favor to ask of you.”
“Anything.” She promises.
“Will you or dad spend the night here with Charlie and the girls?”
“Of course. But why?”
“I need to go home.” I sigh. “I haven’t showered or gotten a real night’s sleep in a week.”

She’s silent for a second before she finally responds.

“Oh thank God. Someone finally got through to you.” She breathes. “Absolutely, one of us will spend the night with Charlie and the girls. I’ll have your dad go with Drew and I’ll stay home with you. I’ll cook dinner for you.”

“Thanks, mom.”

I tell her I love her and we hang up. For the next couple of hours I split my time between my wife and my daughters. I feed Maddy again and stroke Bella’s face with my finger while she sleeps. It’s killing me not being able to pick her up. Not being able to hold her and care for her.

But Dr. Roberts says that she’s actually starting to make good progress in the last two days. She’s still not where she’s supposed to be, but she’s getting there. And that makes me almost cry with relief.

“Now if only mommy could get better.” I whisper to them before I leave. “Then I’d have all three of my girls happy and healthy again.”

-Drew-
I was honestly stunned when Sean’s father asked me to spend the night with him at the hospital. Mainly, I was surprised that Sean is finally going to take a break from being there.

While I appreciate his overwhelming passion and love for my sister and nieces, everyone has noticed that the kid is slowly starting to kill himself. He’s getting really skinny, he’s always looking tired, and he just over all needs a break. I don’t know who finally convinced him to go home, but I’m thankful for them.

“Is there anything else I can do before I leave?” He asks, packing up all of his things that have accumulated in this room over the past week.
“No, Sean.” Sylvain says. “We’re good to go.”
“Okay.”

He looks down at Charlie again, and I can tell it’s tough for him to leave right now.

“I love you, baby.” He whispers and kisses her on the forehead. “I’ll be back soon, I promise.”

Finally he leaves, and Sylvain and I get as comfortable as we can in the hospital chairs.

“How this kid has slept in these things for a week is beyond me.” Sylvain grumbles.
“He hasn’t been paying attention to himself. That’s the main problem.” I respond.
“Well I guess we can deal with it for the night.”

We turn on the television and find the Penguins and Capitals game. The score is tied at one and the two of us start discussing who we’d rather see win at this point.

“So when are you going back to base?” Sylvain asks me at intermission.
“I was supposed to be back last week, but fortunately they’ve given me another two weeks to be here.”
“Wow, that’s generous.”
“I know. I’m really lucky. They said that since I’ve never once requested time off, they have no problem giving me a little bit of personal time. Especially since my little sister is in a coma after giving birth to my two new nieces. And since I’m an officer, I get a little bit of extra consideration for it.”
“I’m glad you can be here.”
“Me too.”

The second period starts with the same score and we get sucked back into it. Malkin scores a beauty goal and I groan, where Sylvain is not as unhappy.

“We need the Penguins to win! The Capitals are ahead of us in the standings and the Penguins are behind us. The Pens win and we gain ground on the Caps.” He says.

“Yeah, but I’m a life time Philly sports guy. I hate the Penguins more than almost anything. I’d rather be behind the Capitals in the standings than see the Pittsburgh fuckers win.” I argue.

We agree to disagree, and turn back to the game. The second period ends with the score staying the same, and with Dr. Roberts coming into the room.

“Hello, gentlemen. I heard you’re staying overnight.”
“We are.” Sylvain responds with a smile.
“Fantastic. Sean needed a night at home.”

We agree and she goes over to Charlie to check her vitals before she leaves.

“Well, Charlie is looking fantastic at this point. Her body is healing well from both the cesarian section and the hysterectomy. I truly don’t understand why she hasn’t woken up yet, but I don’t think it will be too long from now.”

Sylvain and I visibly breathe sighs of relief.

“When you talk to Sean next, will you please tell him I got confirmation that the thing we talked about was successful?”

I nod, totally curious about the comment but not wanting to be nosy. She says good night and leaves just in time for the third to start.

Unfortunately for me, the score holds and the Penguins pull off the 2-1 win. I groan, but understand that the Flyers are now only one point behind the Capitals. So yeah, maybe that was a good thing. But it still sucks.

“I’m going to go call Sean and let him know what Dr. Roberts says before he goes to sleep.” Sylvain says, standing and heading for the door.

I nod and he leaves before I realize he’s giving me time to be with my sister alone. I look at Charlie and sigh.

“How did you get yourself into this mess, sis?” I ask. “I thought I was the reckless one.”

I think back on the joke we had when we were kids. I broke so many bones in a couple of years from being a teenage boy that Charlie and I had started a running joke that I should have had an entire room dedicated to me and only me at the children’s hospital. I grab my sister’s hand and rub it between my fingers.

“Charlie.” I sigh. “I know a couple of people have told you this already, but we really need you to wake up, okay? You’re the heart of so many people. We’re fumbling here because of this. Your beloved Flyers are on a bad streak right now. You know they won six in a row before you went into labor, and now in the past week they’ve dropped three. And not in a good way. They got blown out all three games. This team is broken hearted because they’re so worried about you. And don’t even get me started on Sean. Charlie, I know you can’t see him. But he looks horrible. He’s lost so much weight and he’s always here. He’s failing, Charlie. He doesn’t know what to do anymore. He needs you.”

I’m not sure what else to say. I feel a tear fall down my cheek and reach up to wipe it away. But that moment when I reach up is the moment that I finally break down. I’ve been holding back for so long that I practically crumble.

My head falls to the bed next to my sister’s body and my sobs hit hard. I feel so weak, breaking like this. An Army officer isn’t supposed to be like this. I’m supposed to be strong. If my team saw me like this, it would be horrible for my reputation. It would change the way my team looks at me in the field.

But they’re not here. My sister is. My sister who is currently in a coma.

I feel a hand rest on my shoulder and figure Sylvain has come back into the room. Man, is this embarrassing. My brother-in-law’s father caught me bawling my eyes out. But I don’t even care anymore. I can’t feel anything.