One Heart With Two Owners

*Zacky's P.O.V.*

The tour with the guys was over and we were already on our plane back home. While the other guys decided to sleep I just sat there, starring out of the window and thinking of my friend Brian. The letter was still in my pocket unopened and I really struggled if I should do it. I partly could understand him not telling Michelle anything about this, but on the other side should we been able to spend our lives together when no one is supposed to know about it. I didn’t want to live in a relationship that happens behind the curtains. There were so many unanswered questions and there was still that moment in the hospital where he asked me if I would give him one more minute. I fought with my little demon and finally pulled out the letter to read it.

Dear Zacky,

When you will read this I will be already on my way back to California. I’ve been talking to my friend for hours and decided that it will be better to start working for his production company than waiting that Matt will finally make a decision about my place in the band. You know about my feelings for you and that will never change even though it might looks a bit different from your point of view. I regret my step signing that marriage contract years ago. In case of a divorce she will get the half of my income, my house and Pinkly. I really didn’t think this through and was too blind to sign this little fucking piece of paper. I never had thought that I might fall in love with someone else. It’s really naïve to think that kind of way I know, but she always accepted my little affairs just because she knows she won’t get anything if she would be leaving me. I love you Zacky and please continue living your dream! I know you want this so badly and you should know that you can reach me day and night!

Bri xxx

I really had no idea what I should think about that. It was really eye-opening for me. I knew that Matt and Brian signed a marriage contract, but I really had no fucking idea that this includes a rule when they would leave their wives. I felt pretty ignorant for calling him a pussy now. I already did that as soon as he left the hospital but now after reading his note I just felt pretty sorry for being so harsh on him. Brian even booked a room just for us, something where we could have spent time with when there wouldn’t be that stupid accident. I put that note back into the envelope and back into my pocket.
I rather wanted to get some sleep before we land in Los Angeles. I would probably need all my energy there. Just ten more hours until we finally would be back home.

~*~

It was pretty early in the morning when we arrived the Los Angeles Airport. We were all still pretty sleepy and jetlagged. I hate these long flights but finally I would be home soon, sleep in my own bed and wouldn’t get out for the next few days anyway. I need to catch up on some sleep until I would be the old Zacky again. I didn’t want to confront Brian when I was still a grumpy sleepy old man, so it would take some time until I would be talking to him about our dispute at the hospital.

“I will call you later” I said to Johnny that looked more like a Zombie than a real human being.

His hair was completely tousled and I really could imagine that his dark circles around his eyes got worse too if he wouldn’t hide them behind his sunglasses. Since Brian left the band we all lost a little bit of our motivation but the parties got longer because no one of us could really sleep when we had to deal with some shitty comments that were everywhere on the internet. Though we tried to avoid them as good as we could we couldn’t deny that many fans were sad about him leaving the band. These messages were almost everywhere and even we haven’t been on the computer that much Larry kept reading them. It wasn’t a big help when he repeated how disappointed he was that we let him leave the band. Brian was actually old enough to make his own decisions and he couldn’t blame us for getting another job.

I paid the taxi driver and by getting out I saw someone standing on my house. Was that a burglar and he was about getting into my house?! I know that Meaghan already moved to a friend since I told her about my secret feelings for Brian.
By getting closer to my house the burglar looked quite familiar and when he finally turned around I saw Brian standing there, his eyes filled with tears and his clothes had been looking better already.

“What happened to you, dude?” I asked totally confused and really started to wonder if he was sleeping outdoors the last days.

“Well I finally lost my house, Pinkly and soon all of my money because I have to pay for her for the rest of her life, the lawyer and the court fees.”

“Just come in and then you explain to me everything.”

I really had no idea what he was talking about. He mentioned something like this in the letter and I was expecting the worst to be honest. Michelle had probably found out about his affair already.

“Thank you” he smiled slightly.

When I wasn’t wrong he even got thinner since the last time I saw him. It was making me sad that he probably suffered here while we had been in Europe promoting our latest album.

“Why haven’t you been calling me or one of the guys when you lost your home” I closed the door and put the keys onto a little table that was standing next to the door.

“I actually didn’t want to because I was wrong about Meaghan. She had told to the wives about us and even made some fun on the internet. I actually haven’t seen it. Michelle just told me while throwing all my clothes out of the window.”

“I knew it” I whispered and covered my face with my hands.

Since the day when Brian left the guys looked at me differently, but still tried to act normally when we were on stage or when it came to our drinking games we usually did after every show. Just no one had told me about it.

“Take a shower first and I see if I have any clothes for you.”

I sighed and followed him upstairs. While he was going to the bathroom I went into my bedroom and looked for some clothes from the time when I was a little chubby Zacky. I think these were the only clothes that would might fit the best.
When I finally found a black shirt and dark blue jeans at some corner I quickly put them into the bathroom and went downstairs straight into the kitchen. I sat down with the bottle beer in my hand and tried to come up how we are going to solve this little problem. I knew that Brian was torn between his love to Michelle and me. There wasn’t any solution that would make everyone happy. Someone had to loose and I feared that this would be me in this scenario.
It wasn’t taking pretty long until Brian was coming downstairs with my clothes on. It looks pretty funny really but his face was still the same emotionless one that I saw when he was waiting on my door.

“Now you tell me everything. Please” I put my hand onto his shoulder, stroking his arm a little bit and glancing into his brown eyes.

“I’m grateful man that you still talk with me after our last conversation” he looked down on the floor and seemed in all pretty nervous. “It all happened when I was saying goodbye to the guys. I just wanted to leave but then Michelle stormed out of the hotel and yelling for anybody to hear what asshole I am for having an affair with you. I tried to explain it to the guys that nothing happened between us except that we both discovered feelings for each other that were beyond friendship feelings. They were handling this very well. And when I finally reached my house later she started to scream again, throwing things out and took my front door keys away. That’s how the story ends.”

“Where have you been sleeping? Please don’t tell me you have been sleeping outdoors the whole time.”

He just nodded. I really couldn’t believe that. Ok it was summer in California and the nights were pretty warm as well, but he had tons of friends where he could find some shelter as well.

“Can I move to your place? Just as long as I have found something new of course” he pouted and glanced at me with his sad eyes that finally dried.

“Of course you can silly” I was partly relieved that we went back to the friend mode. “But why don’t you go upstairs and sleep for a little while? You look pretty tired.”

Brian chuckled a little bit and for one second I could see his eyes sparkling again. It would be taking some time until he would be the old same man again. He definitely had to make a few decisions in the future but first of all I would care for him. Living with him under the same roof would probably a lot of fun and would us give the opportunity to get closer to each other, at least I hoped that. I wasn’t really sure if we were still sitting in the same boat when it came to our ‘relationship’. But I would find that out later.
I showed him he could finally find some rest in a comfy bed instead of sleeping somewhere outside. At least I knew now that he was safe.

“Thank you” he smiled at me before he was taking off the shirt and pants again to crawl under the blanket.

I just wanted to leave the room when I heard him calling my name again.

“Yeah” I turned around glancing at him.

“Can you stay here with me, please?”

Well I was tired as well. I haven’t got much sleep on the plane while two of my band members had a little snoring contest. How was I supposed to get some rest?!
I nodded grinning but before I could crawl under the blanket as well Brian stopped me with his hand.

“Don’t you want to take these out?” he raised an eyebrow.

I shook my head smiling and before we would start a discussion about me taking off my pants and shirt I just did it. I threw them into the next corner before I finally crawled under the blanket. There was no comparison to the bed in the hotel. It was true: home was the best place to stay and no one would get me out of here for the next 12 hours.
My eyes literally closed itself and before I felt finally asleep I noticed someone wrapping arm a bit shyly around my waist.