All I'll Ever Need

Sid, I promise I’m okay, but can you call me when you get the chance? It’s non-life threateningly urgent.

I had texted Sidney not long after Matty told me what happened. Really, my reaction wasn’t the greatest. He hadn’t wanted me to know because he wasn’t sure how I would react, and really, it made sense.

I didn’t even know how I was gonna react.

Sidney was obviously busy, and I hadn’t expected a phone call until he got to DC. After just an hour, though, my phone was ringing.

“Hello?”

“What’s going on?” he asked, and even though I had stressed that everything was okay, he seemed very worried.

I sighed. “Sorry. It’s . . . Matty and Suzie.”

“Oh.” He exhaled sharply and took a couple seconds to catch his breath. “Guess he finally told you.”

“You knew?!”

“Yes, but be asked me not to tell you,” Sidney said. “He was worried you’d be upset.”

“I think I am,” I admitted. “And I really shouldn’t be, I know, but . . . he’s my brother. I don’t wanna lose her, though, but how could I pick her side after everything Matty has done for me?”

“Alright, sweetheart,” he said, and he was so calm that a little bit of his calm rubbed off on me. “One drunk kiss doesn’t mean they’re even gonna date. If it didn’t mean anything, then there’s nothing to worry about, alright?”

“Why would they avoid each other then?”

I knew he didn’t have an immediate answer when he paused for a good bit. “Look . . . maybe it did mean something, but they’re both grown adults who can take cares of themselves. If something comes from this, maybe it’s for the best. Matty needs someone, ya know. He doesn’t have confidence in himself anymore.”

“And Suzie needs someone like Matty,” I murmured. “Who will treat her right and show her that she has value.”

“See?” he asked, and he let out a soft laugh. “Maybe they need each other. What’d you say when he told you?”

“Nothing,” I admitted. “I just sat there for a minute and then came back into your room. I’ve been here ever since.”

“Well, at least you didn’t freak out around him,” he said. “Is that all you needed? We were gonna grab something to eat before the flight.”

“Yeah, yeah,” I said. “Go on. Thanks, Sid.”

“Stop!” he laughed. “You know you don’t have to thank me. I’ll do anything for you, babe.”

Babe . . . I guess it shouldn’t have surprised me. I mean, he called me sweetheart and beautiful, but to hear him call me babe caught me off guard.

It also made me smile bigger than I had since this morning. “Well, you better get used to it. I’ll thank you for everything you do until the day we die.”

There was a pause, only brief, before a deep and shaky breath came through the speaker. “I imagine myself growing old with you, and for once in my life, it gives me something to look forward to once I retire from hockey. I, uh, I gotta go. I love you, and I’ll see you tomorrow, okay? Don’t forget about that thing we gotta do. Bye, Mika.”

And he hung up before I even had a chance to respond.

After talking to Sidney, I was ready to calmly talk to Matty and see why he was acting the way he was. Sidney had a point—I might be overreacting. This could just be a drunk kiss that blows over and is never thought about again.

But maybe they did really need each other.

Matty wasn’t in the living room when I came out of Sid’s room, but I ca me out just in time to hear a knock on the front door.

There was absolutely no telling who it was. Surely most people who knew Sidney would know he was gone for hockey, right? Or maybe they didn’t realize he would leave the day before. Either way, I was very skeptical about answering it.

When I looked through the peep hole, an unknown woman stood there. It didn’t make me feel any more at ease, however—was this a puck bunny? A Sidney fan girl?

I opened the door with a forced smile that I hoped looked pleasant—after all, she may just be a nice woman. She certainly looked harmless enough, though she was very pretty with her brunette curls and her hazel green eyes.

“Hi. Sidney’s not here right now.”

She looked surprised—and displeased—to see me. “Um, I’m sorry. Who are you?”

“My name’s Mika, and I’m Sid’s friend,” I said, and as much as I hated still having to use that word, it was the only thing that wasn’t a lie. Unfortunately, girlfriend still was.

“If he’s not here, why are you?”

My eyebrows rose. “Didn’t realize I had to explain myself to you?”

“If you don’t, I’ll call the cops, and you can explain yourself to them in the back of a squad car!” she threatened, but I didn’t really get the feeling that she was messing around. Her jealous eyes were dark and had a seriousness a joking person wouldn’t have.

I scoffed. “Call us the housesitters.”

“Us?”

I ignored her confusion for a moment and pulled my phone out. I quickly found a picture of Sidney and me, one we took at the skating rink. I was gonna just get a friendly picture, but Sidney had to be adorable and snuggle his face into my neck.

“My brother and me,” I said. “Look, I don’t have to explain myself to you. He’s eating with the guys right now, and then they’re getting on the plane for DC. You can call him and interrupt him if you want, but I’m not bullshitting you right now. Sid knows we’re here.”

That seemed to be enough to convince her, and she looked very apologetic. “I’m sorry. I must’ve come off as very rude, but you have no idea how many girls try and act like Sidney’s friend so I’ll get him to come out.”

My anger immediately faded. So she wasn’t anyone bad . . . only a concerned neighbor and friend.

I was able to smile at her now. “It’s alright. I’m sorry, too. I’m . . . a bit overly defensive.”

She shook her head. “Understandable, though I don’t think I’d tell people Sid’s my friend if I were you. I’d claim that sexy man in a heartbeat!”

I bit my bottom lip and shrugged. “I mean, right now, that’s all we are.”

She cocked an eyebrow. “Right now?”

“Well, it’s complicated.”

Her nose curled. “Not because of hockey, right?”

“Because of me, actually,” I corrected. “I was an idiot. I was so afraid to lose him that I didn’t wanna take the risk of being more, and now he wants to wait until he can properly take me out.”

She laughed. “Sounds like Sid. Well, I hope the very best for you.”

“Did you need something?” I asked. “Sid calls every night, so I can let him know.”

She shook her head. “Nah, it’s okay. I was just gonna be leaving town for the night, and I was gonna see if he minded watching my dog. If he’s home, he usually does, but it’s not a big deal.”

My eyebrows rose. “I can totally watch it for you. I adore dogs, but I’m far too busy to have one right now.”

Her eyes lit up. “That would be amazing! She adores new people, so don’t worry about her not liking you. She doesn’t eat more than she needs, so if you put too much food in her bowl, don’t worry. She won’t get fat off it.”

“What kind of dog is she?”

“A Yorkie poo,” she smiled. “Her name is Zoey.”

My bottom lip poked out. “Aw! Those are the cutest. My friend Suzie used to have a Yorkie poo, and he was an angel. Do you want me to come over there, or what?”

“Well, we’re leaving in a couple hours, so before we leave, I’ll stop by and drop her off,” she said. “Thank you so much. You’re amazing. Definitely understand what Sidney sees in you. You said your name was Mika, right?”

I nodded and gave her another pleasant smile. “Yeah. What’s yours?”

“I’m Elle,” she greeted, and she smiled right back. “I hope you stick around.”

“I definitely intend to.”

She waved goodbye and disappeared off the front porch, and I barely got the door closed before Suzie came shuffling her way into the living room behind me, one eyebrow raised in my direction.

I turned to look at her with both eyebrows raised. “That was his neighbor. She needs me to dog sit tonight, so she’s gonna bring her dog, Zoey, over in a couple hours.”

Suzie’s eyes lit up in excitement. “That’s awesome! What kind is it?”

“A Yorkie poo,” I said, and I started to say more, but her loud squeal cut me off for a few seconds. While she bounced around and did a strange happy dance that showed her inner child, I just smiled and went on. “So, Suz . . . I need to ask you something.”

“Look, Mika, I understand,” she said, before I could even ask my question. “I understand. He’s your brother. It’s weird for you. You don’t have to say it. It won’t happen again.”

My eyebrows furrowed. “Uh, no, actually. I was gonna say . . . you need someone like Matty, and I think he needs someone like you.”

She scoffed. “Yeah, right. He needs a heroin addict who can’t even get her life together.”

I rolled my eyes. “That’s not who you are. All I hear you talking about are mistakes you’ve made. Yeah, you acted like a bitch with Chuck, but I know you, Suzie. You’re a good person who will do anything for anyone who asks something of you. For goodness sake, you wanted to become a doctor so you could open up a free clinic for those who couldn’t afford health care, or for the homeless people! Not to make lots of money . . . you just wanted to help those who couldn’t afford to help themselves.”

“But I did so many bad things to you,” she whispered. “I said so many bad things. All the shit that happened to you . . . I told you to shut up. I didn’t listen to you. I wasn’t the friend I needed to be.”

“See, what I’ve come to realize is that things in the past are just that; they’re in the past, and no matter how much you want to, you can’t fix it,” I said. “You can learn from your mistakes and use those lessons to fix your future. I’m over it, and I think you should be, too. It happened. We’re both happy now, and we’re both in good places in life. I think, when your wounds heal . . . you need someone like Matty as much as Matty needs someone like you.”

I didn’t know if Matty heard me or not. I knew I heard a door open somewhere in the back of the house, but I wasn’t sure if he kept it open long enough to hear what I had to say.

In case he was listening, however, I decided to say something directed at him, too.

“Everyone needs someone in life to show them their worth. Just like I have Sidney . . . I think you two have each other.”