Status: Updated at least once a week but probably more 'cause I have no friends
Stay With Me
Chapter 19
OLIVER'S POV:
"Josh maybe we should stop" I breathlessly said and pushed my hands on his shoulders in an attempt to push him away. That didn't work thought since he kept kissing and sucking on my neck.
"Relax, my mom won't be home until the morning" he whispered before pressing his lips to mine again.
I was currently trapped underneath him on his bed with an erection poking through the front of my jeans. It's not that I wanted him to stop, I really did want him but it was just that I wasn't sure that I was ready to give myself to him yet. I loved him but whenever I thought about sex what my dad did to me popped up into my head and it honestly made me scared. I didn't want him to get mad at me for saying no but what would be worse if I said I couldn't do it during it and he didn't stop.
"I'm not in the mood, that's all" I said before pushing a final time and this time forcing us both up in a sitting position.
"You sure about that?" he asked and looked down at my crotch. I blushed in embarrasment before taking my pillow and covering my erection with it. Silence.
"Oli, I understand if you're not ready to do this yet, I'm not going to force you" he said and relief washed over me. "How about we watch a movie instead?" he suggested and I nodded, still with that shade of red covering my face.
--
The days started to slowly pass again and me and Hannah became friends I guess. I mean we weren't exactly best friends 'cause I didn't talk much but there weren't anything wrong between us. Josh was happy that we made up after all and it led to us 3 hanging out together a lot more again. Hannah was acting like there hasn't been anything off between us and I was happy for that.
Josh on the other hand had began acting weird. I walked in on him talking to his mom the other day and when he noticed that I had arrived they both went silent. That also happened when I walked up to him while he talked with Hannah.
My first thought was to just letting it go but it started to happen more often and he and Hannah began gave each other these looks sometimes that I couldn't read. I was not sure about what to think of it.
The first thought that popped up into my head was that he was cheating on me with Hannah. It made sense to me. What else would it be?
Even though he said he was gay, maybe he was getting bicurious? Maybe he just needed an sexual outlet since I wouldn't have sex with him? Maybe I needed to have sex with him to get him to be fully mine again?
Okay, I'm thinking way into this right now. What if he's not cheating on me with Hannah at all. After all, I don't think he would just tell his mom if he was cheating. But what if he felt guilty and needed someone to talk to?
What if he wants to break up with me?
I was laying on the bed, staring at the ceiling lost in thought and hadn't noticed Josh walking in until he sat down on the bed. I jumped in surprise and turned my head to look at him.
"Oli, there's something I need to talk to you about"
Oh fuck.
"Josh maybe we should stop" I breathlessly said and pushed my hands on his shoulders in an attempt to push him away. That didn't work thought since he kept kissing and sucking on my neck.
"Relax, my mom won't be home until the morning" he whispered before pressing his lips to mine again.
I was currently trapped underneath him on his bed with an erection poking through the front of my jeans. It's not that I wanted him to stop, I really did want him but it was just that I wasn't sure that I was ready to give myself to him yet. I loved him but whenever I thought about sex what my dad did to me popped up into my head and it honestly made me scared. I didn't want him to get mad at me for saying no but what would be worse if I said I couldn't do it during it and he didn't stop.
"I'm not in the mood, that's all" I said before pushing a final time and this time forcing us both up in a sitting position.
"You sure about that?" he asked and looked down at my crotch. I blushed in embarrasment before taking my pillow and covering my erection with it. Silence.
"Oli, I understand if you're not ready to do this yet, I'm not going to force you" he said and relief washed over me. "How about we watch a movie instead?" he suggested and I nodded, still with that shade of red covering my face.
--
The days started to slowly pass again and me and Hannah became friends I guess. I mean we weren't exactly best friends 'cause I didn't talk much but there weren't anything wrong between us. Josh was happy that we made up after all and it led to us 3 hanging out together a lot more again. Hannah was acting like there hasn't been anything off between us and I was happy for that.
Josh on the other hand had began acting weird. I walked in on him talking to his mom the other day and when he noticed that I had arrived they both went silent. That also happened when I walked up to him while he talked with Hannah.
My first thought was to just letting it go but it started to happen more often and he and Hannah began gave each other these looks sometimes that I couldn't read. I was not sure about what to think of it.
The first thought that popped up into my head was that he was cheating on me with Hannah. It made sense to me. What else would it be?
Even though he said he was gay, maybe he was getting bicurious? Maybe he just needed an sexual outlet since I wouldn't have sex with him? Maybe I needed to have sex with him to get him to be fully mine again?
Okay, I'm thinking way into this right now. What if he's not cheating on me with Hannah at all. After all, I don't think he would just tell his mom if he was cheating. But what if he felt guilty and needed someone to talk to?
What if he wants to break up with me?
I was laying on the bed, staring at the ceiling lost in thought and hadn't noticed Josh walking in until he sat down on the bed. I jumped in surprise and turned my head to look at him.
"Oli, there's something I need to talk to you about"
Oh fuck.
♠ ♠ ♠
This was short sorry