Half Drunk Love

“I’m boooored,” Brendon groaned, throwing his hands in the air. They’d been on this couch for what seemed to him like hours, watching what ryan dubbed ‘the best tv show to ever have lived’, which in reality was some weekly interview with the “up and coming” music stars of this generation. or something.
Normally, he wouldn’t have had a problem with putting up with it, for his boyfriend’s sake, but they’d been drinking. Well, he’d been drinking. A lot. And alcohol tended to have a rather, unusual effect on him. Ryan said it made him go batshit crazy. Brendon preferred the term slightly hyperactive.
“Ryan. Ryan. Ry. Ryyyyan,” Brendon said, punctuating each ‘ryan’ with a prod to the older boy’s arm.
Ryan looked over at him, finally taking his eyes off the tv screen. “What.” he sighed. Whatever Brendon wanted, in his current state, couldn’t be good.
“ I want - hiccup- I wanna make a cake. Let’s make a cake. Oh! Maybe some pudding! You love pudding don’t you...or was that Jon? C’mon Ry, lets make something” Brendon gushed, eyes wide. He really wanted to make something, anything, even those cakes with the raisins in them that he hated with a passion but ryan seemed to have an everlasting love for. anything to get off this couch.
“fine...what do you wanna make bren?” Ryan murmured slowly, as if talking to a child. Brendon wasn’t a child for god’s sakes he was 20 years old!
“Apple pie!” brendon shouted, jumping off the couch.
“Not a child my ass,” ryan muttered as he let himself get dragged along by the hurricane that is his boyfriend.

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as soon as they made it to the kitchen, brendon was straight into the cupboards, tearing out countless ingredients.
"bren...maybe we should get a recipe?" Ryan asked, eyes scanning over the 'ingredients' that the younger boy placed on the counter. seriously. who needs food colouring in an apple pie anyway?
"uh no? this is gonna be the best pie ever, screw recipes. they are yet another unattainable standard for baked goods" brendon argued, fixing ryan with a look as he placed the bowl, mixer, and various other utensils on the counter. well at least he was getting that right. mostly. but who knows? maybe a soup ladle was an essential part of creating a pie. maybe?
at least they already had a premade crust. Ryan could only imagine the state of the kitchen (and themselves) if that hadn't been the case. hell, he knows that they'll most likely end up getting messy anyways.
"come on ryan let's get started" brendon said, rushing over to hand him a container of...sprinkles?
"uh brendon?" ryan asked, looking down at the container in his hands quizzically.
"we absolutely need sprinkles ryan. everything tastes better sprinklefied, it's like scientifically proven or something." brendon explained, adding chocolate chips, a can of peaches, and a packet of salt & vinegar chips to the base. he gestured to ryan to do the same with the pile in front of him.
a packet of caramel popcorn, tinned tomato and...was that sour cream? oh god.
"are you sure b?" ryan asked, eyeing the ingredients in front of him with more than a little concern. he didn't want to know what this was going to taste like.
brendon nodded, adding some more sprinkles to his 'masterpiece'.
Ryan sighed, slowly adding his ingredients to the pie and placing the crust on top.
"in the oven in the oven in the oven c'mon ry let's gooooo" brendon gushed, bouncing on his heels.
shaking his head, ryan placed the pie in the oven and set the timer.
"and now we wait." he murmured, ushering the younger boy back into the lounge room.

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ryan heard the timer go off, and hoped to god brendon didn't hear it. while waiting he'd come to the conclusion that possibly if he ignored the pie, the pie would therefore not exist, and he would not have to eat any. alas, that obviously was too much to ask for.
"PIEEEEEE!!" brendon shouted, running into the kitchen.
"please don't burn yourself," Ryan muttered, following the excited boy into the kitchen, where by some miracle brendon had already managed to get the pie out of the oven and onto the counter.
if you could even call it a pie anymore. the crust was burnt black, holes littered it's surface with a disgusting looking substance leaking from any cracks in the pastry. no. no way in hell he was eating that.
"y-you don't want any of my pie?" brendon whimpered. he said that out loud. dammit.
"uh no no it's okay I'll have a piece." ryan rushed, placing some plates and cutlery on as brendon cut some pieces. just one piece. Ryan put his head in his hands. he felt sick already.
ryan looked up just in time to see brendon offering him his plate. taking it off him, ryan looked on in horror as brendon took the first bite.
"ugh it's sooo good babe" the other boy moaned, his mouth already full of that...monstrosity.
ryan seriously doubted it. raising his spoon to his mouth cautiously, he took a bite.
nope. all aboard the nope train to fuckthatville.
"what in the actual fuck is that that can't be edible" ryan choked, spitting the offending piece of food (if you can even call it that) back onto his plate.
brendon cocked his head to the side, confused. as if he couldn't comprehend that he was eating the devil spawn of the baking world.
"what?" brendon asked, taking another bite of his 'pie'.
"seriously? that right there? that's Dante's baked inferno. at this point I'm not even sure that's edible...i'm not eating that" ryan scoffed, shaking his head. there was no way he was gonna eat that. no way.
"suit yourself, just don't expect anything from me later," brendon smirked, a glint in his eye.

maybe that pie wasn't so bad after all.