Verboten

Alex giggled as Jack peppered kisses along his neck, glancing behind him at the door. “Someone could see,” he whispered, tugging at Jack’s hair to get his attention.

“The door’s closed,” Jack answered dismissively, lifting Alex up by his thighs and sitting him on the desk. Alex squealed and wound his legs around Jack’s waist.

“There’s a window in it,” Alex hissed, his heart beating fast from the making out and the anxiety. He pushed Jack back gently as he tried to kiss his jawline, knowing it would just distract him.
Jack sighed and pressed his forehead against Alex’s briefly, before stepping away and flopping into his desk chair.

“Sorry,” Alex said, in a voice that was barely a whisper. He felt tears building up behind his eyes, angry at himself and upset for disappointing Jack. He looked down at his lap, his vision blurring.

“Alex? Alex, I’m not mad,” Jack said in surprise. “I just…I’m just annoyed at your anxiety.”

Alex nodded. This was what he’d feared for so long, that Jack would get tired of his mental illnesses and leave him. That was why he’d been hiding them from his boyfriend lately. “I’ll just go then,” he said in a small, choked voice.

“What? No!” Jack caught hold of his sleeve as he made to go. “I didn’t mean it like that,” he said softly, drawing Alex into a hug. Despite squeezing his eyes shut, a tear still leaked onto Jack’s shirt. “I meant that I hate what it does to you, not that I hate you because of it.”

Alex shuddered in relief, finally bursting into tears. Carefully, Jack guided them both so they were sitting in Jack’s ergonomic chair, Alex curled up in his lap while he sobbed his heart out.

“I thought you were getting a little better,” Jack muttered kindly. “You seemed better.”

In between sniffles and sobs, Alex offered a basic explanation, “I…no. Not really. I just…it gets better around you and I didn’t want you to leave me…and I don’t know. It’s not better.”

Jack didn’t reply with words but tightened his hug instead, kissing the top of Alex’s head. Eventually he said, “Don’t keep this from me. I want to help.”

Alex nodded shakily, but deep down he knew that he probably would keep on hiding how he felt; it just came naturally to him by now. But he would pretend for Jack’s sake, to make him feel better. “I want to go home,” he muttered.

Jack laughed softly. “It’s lunchtime,” he said softly. “You can’t go home yet.”

“Fight me,” came the muffled reply from Alex. He sniffed and glanced up, and Jack kind of wanted to punch himself in the face because the student was so cute.

“Definitely,” Jack replied with a wicked grin, and attacked…with tickles.

“No! No! Stop!” Alex shrieked, worming out of Jack’s grip and falling on the floor. Jack seized the opportunity and straddled Alex’s hips, pinning him down and mercilessly tickling him. Alex was barely able to breathe from laughing so hard, and even though he was trying to push Jack off him, he was enjoying it far too much.

Jack stopped when Alex started coughing, rolling off him and laughing himself at Alex’s wheezing giggles. “Fuck me,” Alex gasped, clutching at his stomach.

“In a heartbeat,” Jack grinned, kissing Alex sloppily.

Alex smiled lazily. It was times like this that made him realise just how lucky he was to be in love, and made him forget that his depression actually existed. Love wasn’t going to cure him completely, but it could hold off the symptoms temporarily. “Why don’t you then?”

Jack paused in the middle of straightening his tie. “You’re young,” he reminded his boyfriend. “And you have issues, and I’m not messing your brain up.” He tapped the side of Alex’s head for emphasis.

Alex grinned. “You already make me produce larger than normal amounts of serotonin, one of love's most important chemicals,” he said promptly. “And considering that serotonin has the possibility to turn someone temporarily insane…I’d say we’re past that stage.” He crawled towards Jack and kneeled over him, nuzzling into his neck.

Jack breathed out shakily. “You make a compelling argument for such a nerd.”

Alex bit the lobe of Jack’s ear gently for that comment, smiling to himself at Jack’s gasp of arousal.
“How about tonight?”

Jack so badly wanted to resist, but the look that Alex was giving him with his eyes clouded with lust and arousal and the way he was licking, biting, sucking his neck and the way that his hand was oh so lightly hovering over his crotch and fuck what was he thinking about again –

“Tonight,” Jack agreed breathlessly, pulling Alex towards him to kiss him deeply. He didn’t know whether he’d be able to hold on until tonight, at the rate this was going, but he definitely wasn’t going to let Alex lose his virginity on the classroom floor.