Verboten

Jack kept quiet as Alex directed him back out of his complicated estate. He wasn’t sure whether the younger wanted to talk, but he was tensed at the shoulders and his body was hunched over. Finally, when they had joined the main road and Alex fell silent, Jack spoke up. “What’s wrong?”

Alex sighed and glanced over at his teacher. “I hate storms,” he admitted. “My house always shakes from the wind, and I can hear the rain and thunder really clearly, and the lightning freaks me out.” He settled back against his seat, looking a little more relaxed.

“Have you ever had a panic attack from storms?” Jack questioned. He made sure his tone was light and relaxed. He had never experienced a panic attack himself, but now that he had seen several of
Alex’s, he knew how terrible they were to experience.

Alex nodded. He considered for a few moments, and then answered, “I think I’ve had at least one every time there’s been a storm,” he confessed.

“Why do they make you anxious, do you have any idea?” Jack asked, flicking his indicator on and steering round a sharp corner slowly, cautious of the flooded road.

“I’m not sure, they just shake me,” he said, and then slammed his hand onto the dashboard vehemently.

“Hey, hey!” Jack soothed, leaning over and grasping Alex’s smaller hand in his. He still had to keep his eyes on the road but he kept talking. “Don’t do that, okay? It’s fine. It’s not bad, it’s absolutely fine. I’ll get you to my house and we can close all of the curtains and sit on the sofa and watch a DVD or something. My house doesn’t sway from wind, and it’s got thick walls so you can’t hear what’s going on. It’ll be fine.”

He could hear Alex’s forced breaths, and he knew that Alex was making himself breathe deeper than usual, most likely to stave off a panic attack. Fortunately, they were no more than two minutes from Jack’s house, so Jack continued his soothing mantra as he drove with one hand on the wheel and the other being squeezed by Alex.

“Here we are,” Jack announced, pulling into his driveway effortlessly. “Want to meet Biscuit?” He turned off the engine and raised his eyebrows playfully.

Alex’s own eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Biscuit?”

“My dog,” Jack answered, his eyes flickering over Alex’s face. He smiled when he saw the younger’s eyes light up. “Want to go inside?”

LINE BREAK

Both of them were in Jack’s living room now; as Alex was drenched, he had borrowed some sweatpants and an old jumper of Jack’s, and Jack had changed out of his work clothes into something comfier as well.

Jack had made hot chocolate for Alex and he was watching the younger as he sipped at the mug hesitantly. They were both curled up on the sofa, and Jack had put his glasses on and put on some
Doctor Who re-runs, remembering that Alex had once mentioned his love for the show.

There was a large crash from the storm outside, so loud it was as if was directly over Jack’s roof, and Alex flinched and pulled his knees up to his chest. “Do you want me to turn the sound up?” Jack asked softly, not wanting to startle or frighten the younger boy in any way.

Alex nodded and leant forward to set his mug down on the coffee table. It was only half-drunk, Jack noticed, but he decided not to push it. Maybe he felt freaked out by the storm so he was feeling ill? Jack ignored the niggling voices that were voicing their own concerns, whispering about eating disorders and self-harm.

Jack shuffled towards Alex, just as some kind of horrific monster extended its neck towards a cowering man and hissed: “We are living!” Jack didn’t understand this program at all. Alex was watching the screen intently, his eyes wide and focused on the TV screen. He was sitting very straight and Jack could see his spine through the thin material of his shirt faintly.

Jack wrapped his arms around Alex’s waist, giggling when his student jumped. Vaguely he realised that this was wrong, but he didn’t care. Alex was tense, he could tell, and he hated seeing him distressed in anyway. “Sorry,” he laughed, feeling Alex settle back against him almost immediately.

“It’s okay,” Alex muttered, leaning against Jack’s chest and climbing onto his lap. Jack’s breath hitched: yes, Alex was younger than him, and his pupil, but if an incredibly attractive male was going to clamber onto his lap while they were both wearing thin, loose sweatpants, he was going to be affected.

Hastily, before they got into an awkward (and potentially illegal) situation, Jack said, “Why don’t I get you a blanket? You could sleep for a while. You look tired.” It was true. There were deep, black rings underneath Alex’s warm eyes. Alex considered for a moment and then nodded, sliding off reluctantly.
Jack hurried to the other side of his spacious living room to fetch a furry blanket, and then wrapped it around Alex to keep him warm. The temperature had dropped due to the storm, and he was starting to become chilly as well.

“Where’s Biscuit?” Alex asked drowsily. The mere mention of sleep seemed to have tired him out. He leant against Jack again, who obediently lay down on the sofa so Alex could lie on top of him.

“Not sure,” Jack said gently. “He likes to sit under the table when we have guests round.”

Alex giggled. “Why?”

“No idea.” Jack looked at the position they were in. They were literally pressed together, and Jack was only ever this intimate when he was with a partner. Alex was meant to be his student, for God’s sake. But who would find out? That’s not the point, he reminded himself. The point was that this was illegal, even if nobody knew about it.

“Night,” Alex muttered.

“Night,” Jack replied, even though it wasn’t really.