Flip

Left alone, feeling befuddled of what had just happened the wolf blinked slowly; trying to forget Mila's anger with him. It hadn't been just anger, there was betrayal and offense written onto her small delicate features. It made his wolf whine, placing it's ears against it's head. The last thing he'd wanted to do was upset her; but Mila had to understand she was just a human, in no means able to take down Summick and free the wolves. Feeling cold as the door slammed shut, his wolf demanding he go fix things up with her the alpha forced himself to remain rooted to the spot. He was only trying to look out for her, and maybe he could of put it more elegantly; but she was misunderstanding the entire situation. He hadn't befriended because he felt obligated to- not really. The reason was his alone to know, and it mortified him still. His wolf had been drawn to her; seeing a suitable mate for the prideful alpha. Patrick, had been drawn to her as she was a kind and gentle soul; clever and open minded someone who made his days a little lighter and often brought an absentminded smile to his pale lips eve when she wasn't present to do so.

It was the thought of her that could sustain him at times he'd swear. Day in and day out his wolf paced restlessly demanding that he claim what he wanted for once. Drawn so far into his own thoughts, brooding and remorseful yet frustrated and exasperated, Patrick missed the sound of the door opening and was surprised to hear a throat clearing. Looking up, he found Pete standing there arms crossed looking rather concerned. Patrick said nothing, barely glanced towards his pack-mate as he shuffled towards the examination table, weakly hoisting himself up while the room spun about him. He still didn’t feel fully healed from the previous night. Every expanse of his skin ached and throbbed. Patrick had been aware of was a scalding pain that was burning him from the inside of his body. It felt like the fires of fucking England had broken out over his skin, almost masking the other dull pulsating pains that had flared erupted.

Patrick swore that his teeth and tongue still vibrated with pain while the rusted taste of blood clung to every taste bud, no matter how many glasses of water he downed. His skin still screamed with agony. As if his skin was still caved in with hurt and bruise. Closing his eyes, Patrick winced remembering how Allen’s boots had snapped his ribs, but the worse memory of all was Mila. His breathing heavied as he recalled how she screamed his name and begging the guard to stop. Patrick’s heart clenched as she fought to run to his side, and Allen as he twisted her arm back, making her delicate face screw up with pain.

Just thinking about it Patrick bit back a growl, his eyes narrowing to an almost comical extent. He still remembered how Mila had screamed for him, terrified as guards had forcefully tried to remove her from the room; and worse yet was the memory of being completely helpless to go to her. The strong-minded alpha could still feel the hopelessness of watching her struggle against the security guards, and thankfully Patrick hadn't gotten a good look at his face- otherwise he would of gone after them. Even as he lay curled under Allen's boots, Patrick's wolf had been snarling with rage at the thought of strange men hurting his nurse.

Thinking of the beautiful raven haired nurse the alpha's orbs,seemingly always hovering between shades of a stormy aegean and a deep moss-like green were lowered slowly with a sense of guilt. Once again, this growing impatient Pete cleared his throat again- this time louder. Eyes flashing and biting back an irritated snarl the alpha sighed, "I heard you Pete. What?" Never one to break his "Too cool for everyone" facade Pete simply sauntered over, and tilting his head appeared as angelic as he knew how.

"What's wrong 'Trick-" Biting back a growl as he mimicked what was supposed to be Mila his beta continued. "Trouble in paradise? A lover's spat? Oh dear she looked upset." Patrick knew that his friend was just teasing him, trying to lighten the mood but it was having the opposite effect for him. It was no secret the Patrick’s infatuation with the nurse- his beast’s vehement stubbornness that she was the mate he’d been unintentionally searching for. Patrick had known the first time she stood outside his cage, that heavenly intoxicating scent filling his otherwise dismal room. As for his pack, they had known about Patrick’s quiet admiration for weeks. But admitting that to Pete would only encourage him and his already thin control would vanish.

"She's not like that to me. Just as I'm not in love with you but accepted you into my pack- the same stands for Mila. My wolf felt the need to protect her. That's all Pete." Clearly not believing him Pete smirked, shrugging and with a languid yawn blinked lazily. Sometimes Patrick found Pete to be more cat-like than wolf-like.

"If you say so Chief. I'm exhausted. I'm going to bed. Gary wants you to stay in here a little longer. I guess having your face kicked in earns you a couple in here…" His voice, trailing off towards the end seemed remote and faraway to him. Patrick was lost inside his own head; already consumed by guilty thoughts of Mila and didn't even hear as Pete scuttled from the room; slamming the door behind. Patrick was left on his own, cheeks drawn painfully tight over his high and prominent cheekbones that seemed sunken. The angles of his face seemed too sharp, hollow, and gaunt. It was as if last night had bled out his fire, the determination to live in this place. Instead despair had begun to seep into his bones.

His fight with Mila hadn't helped, and overall the alpha was panicking about it. He wanted to make things right, to apologize but pride held his tongue from doing so. He'd only been looking out for the nurse and if she hadn't been so stubborn maybe Mila would of realized that. Even as he told himself this, Patrick found the words tasteless and false. Trying to keep his mind off of it Patrick paced restlessly around the tiny room; his gaze roaming the white, empty walls. Mila's words, impassioned and fiery swam beneath his thoughts; the way her cheeks flushed with a soft, cherry red color as she hissed that she was going to bring Summick down. It had been tried before but, it hadn't gone well.

From the last time it happened he'd heard a few wolves had gotten out, but what happened to them was unknown. Several of the residents speculated they made a deal with the government; to let them live in peace in the restricted areas of the state, while other's figured they'd died, or simply had re-entered human society. Patrick himself was skeptical to even believe that they had gotten away. He figured it was a tale the elders told to keep everyone's moral up. Lost in his own musings, he missed the opening of the door. It wasn't until he heard an achingly familiar voice calling out his name with a pointed dryness did the alpha look up. A small smile blossomed onto his lips, while his reservations of apologizing died then and there.

"Mila I'm so sorry I-" She clearly wasn't having any of it as she crossed her arms and stepped aside.

To his surprise Evlynn hobbled into the room, while Mila slammed the door. "She found out. She wanted to see you." Ice slid through Patrick's blood and while it was foolish he reached out for Mila, baring his teeth. However Mila swatted his hand away from her, glaring darkly. Even her normal scent, sandalwood, lavender and wildflowers had taken on a darker twist. Like thunder crackling in the sky, rain, and smokey anger.

"Don't touch me." Her voice was flat and Patrick winced; he'd have a lot of making up to do. Evlynn's soft chuckle broke his concentration from the little nurse; his wolf tucking it's tail between it's leg.

"Patrick Stump! I have raised you since you were a little thing and you're going to bare your fangs at me? Shame on you boy. I aint gonna hurt her."

Blushing his wolf stilled, though hackles still raised he watched her nervously. "What did you want to do?" She smiled serenely, taking a few slow steps forward.

"Don't worry dear, I just want to test her claim of being part of your pack. And yours." Unsure of what that meant he said nothing instead looking at Mila. Her jaw was set in a determined fashion that didn't sit well with Patrick. "Go ahead Mila. Just like we talked about." Avoiding Patrick's gaze she nodded, and he could feel her anxiety. It was a very real knotted pit in his stomach that made him a little nauseated.

There wasn’t much he could do however, except carefully watch her, fighting the urge to go over, wrap her in a hug, soothe her hair back- just assure her that she was safe. It was that urge to protect her, one that Patrick liked to pretend he didn’t understand, that kept him near Mila as she nodded at Evlynn's command, going over to one of the supply cabinets; taking out a pair of surgical scissors. His heart twisted into a knot when he saw her take a deep breath, steeling herself. Without warning she plunged the scissors into her bicep, crying out as blood sprang forth, rushing down her slender arms.

The scent of blood hung around Patrick like a red haze; and the wolf in his mind was torn between blood lust, though concern won out in a matter of seconds.

"What the fuck Mila!" He yelped, scrambling to get over to her. She didn't answer, eyes squeezed shut against the waves of pain that broken out on her arm. He felt it too, not as prominently as she did but there was no denying the sting that even he felt. Without saying anything Patrick gritted his teeth, pulling Mila against him, making sure to keep a good grip on her arm and concentrated.

The pain that she was feeling was transferred to the alpha who almost cried out; yet Patrick clenched his teeth with determination. It burned, it felt like his skin was stretching on top of the pains he'd suffered from the night previous. It didn't help that instead of relaxing against him like she normally did; Mila was tense and fought the urge to pull away. There were so many things he wanted to say to her, he always wanted to say, though now wasn't the time or place. His wolf was furious, scratching inside his head; though Patrick wouldn't allow it.

If he let his wolf out, than it would go straight for Evlynn, and he'd never allow that. Instead as the pain receded and the two pulled away His eyes instinctively flickered down to Mila's pale, creamy skin; relieved to find it once again unbroken. Mila's face still looked too pale, her skin too translucent; while her big, grayish green eyes looked exhausted. "Are you ok?" He asked softly, his voice deep and rich, quivering trying not to let her know how much that had shaken him up.

"I'm fine. I'm not as weak as you think." Her voice was full of spite and the alpha groaned, momentarily forgetting that Evlynn was watching the two with silent awe.

"God forbid I try to look out for you Mila. And that wasn't what I meant; you just took it the wrong way… But once again I'm sorry. I could of said it nicer." He mumbled, ears burning as she stared him down; that petulant glare not once letting up.

"We'll discuss this later. Are you happy Evlynn?" Breaking eye contact the curvy, ambrosial woman turned to the elder her gaze blank and devoid of emotion.

"I'm awed. I… I've never heard of an occurrence like this. I… Mila I don't know what this means for wolves, but it may prove that wolves and humans can co-exsist. Can live peacefully side by side. I need to get back to my floor. Gary's around I'll find him and for now let's keep this between us and your pack Patrick. I think you two have some talking to do." Mila opened her mouth to protest, but with surprising speed, Evlynn had already hobbled out the door and into the hallway; leaving only Mila and Patrick there.

"I have work to do." She snapped coldly her eyes narrowed. Feeling helpless as she turned around to leave Patrick stumbled forward, grabbing her arm.

"Don't go. Please." He begged softly, as she refused to look at him.

"Why shouldn't I? Wouldn't your life just be easier if I weren't around. You know the weak link so that you don't have the chore of protecting me?"

At this Patrick briefly lost his temper, and to his horror the sound of his dark growl bounced off the walls . Mila clearly startled took a few instinctive steps towards the door, her face pale and eyebrows knitted together with fright while Patrick ran his hands through his hair trying to calm himself. "I fucked up ok Mila? I fucked up and I'm sorry. I never thought you were a chore. I like being around you. I miss you when you're gone. My days seem slow and boring and just… they s-suck when you're not around." Stuttering and nearly on his anger, remorse and guilt the nurse's shoulders slumped; slightly relaxing.

"That's sweet, but that's not why I'm mad." Her voice, quiet; wreathed in hurt which cut Patrick deeper than any blade.

"Then Mila please explain it to me I don't understand." He pled, his fingers bouncing nervously against his bony hips; tapping out invisible rhythms. She finally looked up at him; her eyes ringing with a quiet defeat.

"So you have to protect me? Doesn't that mean you were just obligated to be my 'friend' and keep me around solely for that purpose? Does that just make me your chore? Well maybe this surprises you, but I actually thought we were friends. Stupid me right?" Understanding now, why she was so upset Patrick opened his mouth; but Mila beat him to it. "I'm exhausted. I'm going to go see Gary for any work and then I'm calling it a day if they let me. Goodbye Patrick."

With that she wrenched her arm from him turned on her heel and stormed out of the room. He wanted to chase her down so badly- but what good would that do? Probably none and he'd likely get shot by a guard if he just charged out of the room. Frustration boiled beneath Patrick's skin as the door slammed shut in his face, and his wolf was furious with him. The beat within him snarled, flashing it's fangs and the aggression it normally kept at bay came at him with a vengeance. It took all of his restraint to walk back to the place he was sitting before she had come, and sit calmly on the examination table once again, and keep the room undestroyed.

True to Pete's prediction Patrick was kept in Gary's office the entirety of the day. His solitude was broken only by visits by the gray haired doctor himself, the southern twang more grating than usual; though Patrick knew his mood was based mostly off of Mila's anger, so tried to keep his temper reigned in. Of course the pack came to visit once or twice, apparently Summick was being rather generous with their "visiting" hours. Immediately they had picked up on Patrick's mood; how could they not? And of course that led to prying to blond would rather not discuss with them. That’s how he found himself currently, sprawled on his back on the floor staring up at the ceiling, tuned out of their update of what was going on currently in the Summick walls.

Andy was the most relentless out of the three, while Pete kept his mouth gleefully shut watching his alpha squirm with amusement. It wasn't malicious; it was more kind-hearted. Currently the four were sprawled out in various places of Grent's office. "Patrick come on, what's eating you? Is it Mila? She looked pissed when she came to drop off lunch." Hanging his head with mortification the alpha just shrugged refusing to answer them.

"Dunno. Took something I said the wrong way I guess."

"Must of been pretty bad. Looked like she was about to cry." Joe remarked, his sharp gaze watching him while his curly, messy brown hair fell about him in an untamed manner.

Cutting in Pete filled them in with a slight tone of amusement that only made the alpha want to shoo them all out of the room. If they were going to gossip like high schoolers, they could do so out of his earshot. "Patrick in an attempt to woo our very human pack mate, pretty much called her an obligation. Naturally Miss Nurse didn't take to that too nicely. And now he's wallowing." That was the last straw. Pushing himself off the examination table where he'd been sitting, wallowing as Pete had so eloquently put it he gritted off a snarl towards Pete. Striding towards the obsidian haired beta in large angry strides Patrick's eyes flashed their crimson warning that he was on the edge of losing his temper.

"What the fuck is your problem Pete?! I know you don't like her but do you really think this is amusing?" Pete's own eyes narrowed as Patrick had to restrain himself from letting his wolf take over. The wolf within his head was furious, every vein pumping with rage; demanding blood.

"I think you're acting like a kid. It' not that hard to see." As if seeking back up he threw a look towards Andy and Joe. "You two see it too right? How she spends more time with him? How he acts around her? I don't understand why you can't just acknowledge the fact you fucked up, you like her and move on. Do you know how many chances we get to be happy in here? Maybe one in a lifetime Patrick! So stop basking in your own self-pity, get off your ass and chase down the thing that makes you happy- her! It’s been months and you still haven’t said or done anything to show her how much you care!"

Patrick paused, his stomach twisting in knots at Pete's simple advice. He had tried to apologize to her but it hadn't worked and the tension in the room was enough to choke on at this point. It wasn’t that simple though, was it? He was a wolf, he was always gonna be locked up in a cage. Mila shouldn’t waste her years on him. They couldn’t be together the way she could with someone who wasn’t locked up for the rest of their lives. There was no promise that ‘Trick even had that much time left in here. He couldn’t ask her to live a life like that with him. The surly alpha was pulled from his thoughts by Joe’s gentle voice, chiming in for the first time on the matter. "Patrick, you can do this. It's ok to want something for yourself. If you can't tell her you want her to be your mate just yet; just focus on apologizing. And not some half-assed apology. You upset her by making Miss Nurse feel like a chore, an obligation. Make her… Un-feel that. If that makes sense." Joe mused, grinning at the nickname that stuck to the raven haired woman.

"You have to be slow though. Human's don't understand the way wolves fall in love. When they know… Well we know and that's it." Andy cautioned, piping up. "I really like Mila and I don't want you scaring her off. But, she's got a soft spot for you. I'm sure it'll work itself out so just… Stop being so pissy." Offering his small smile, masked by the thick red stubble he was letting grow out on his chin Patrick softened under the stares of his pack. They were right. He was overthinking this.

There was no reason this wasn't unrepairable and while it might not work itself out overnight; it would in time. If Patrick was really going to listen to his wolf that this frail, impossibly strong woman was his mate; he'd have to step up. "Thank you guys, really." His voice was soft as his temper began to deflate, the situation feeling more hopeful than it had since their spat.

"We're here for you man, no need to thank us; we're your pack." Pete assured, his voice soft and surprisingly kind. Feeling much, much lighter the rest of the evening passed for Patrick without much of a hitch. That restless itch underneath his skin had receded and when it was time for his pack mates to go back to their floor; the alpha found that sleep came rather easily to him. What he dreamt of was inconsequential nothingness and upon waking on that damned examination table; feeling stiff everywhere possible Patrick was ready for the day to start. Gary of course was the first one in to check on him, deeming him well enough to go back to his own cell.

He hadn't even protested nor complained when Gary brought him back to his cell; though Patrick was alarmed at how much tension smothered the halls. It was hard to ignore the way the guards watched him with a mixture of repulsion and disgust. Patrick imagined the wolves weren't much better off, and the blond alpha found himself on edge, his fingers twitching and face sullen. There were no problems though as Gary walked him to his cell, promising to be back with any news before locking him in. It wasn't the end of the world and Patrick decided to wait for his little nurse to pop by so he could smooth things over; just like the pack had suggested.

Expecting Mila to come down at some point Patrick did what he normally did when he waited for her. Pace the cell, nap, sing softly to himself, meditate yes his life was that boring that he meditated and of course telepathically check in on his pack. Most was normal, Pete's emotions were in check, Andy was exasperated with something, and Joe was feeling sluggishly lazy. What alarmed him was the dark absence he felt from Mila's emotions. Usually her's were fainter granted, but today there was nothing. It perplexed Patrick and left him feeling rather frazzled; making anything other than sulking hard to do. "She's fine. No use in worrying over her." He tried to tell himself that; really he did, but worry he did.

Hours passed by, counted excruciatingly slowly by the strange internal clock all wolves possessed before the door swung open; revealing Mila. She looked completely ashen, and Patrick was on his feet instantly, opening his mouth to apologize. However under her vacant gaze that apology turned to concern. Staggering in and closing the door to his cell Patrick knew that it was about time for his hour of exercise; though that could wait.

"Mila? Are you alright? You look tired." That was to put it lightly and she made a soft noise, a grumble really as she lumbered towards his bed to sit down. As she passed him he fought the urge to rest his hand against her forehead to see if she had a fever.

"I'm fine." Sitting beside her, hoping she wouldn't bite his head off Patrick was almost amused when he caught it. The unmistakable burning scent that filled his nose- alcohol. It was relieving to know that she was hungover, and not sick.

"So, how much did you drink?" He posed it as a casual question; though Mila reacted with venom.

"I hate it when you do that. It's like I can't keep any of my own life private. Can you smell what I had for lunch in third grade?" It wasn't overly friendly, but an undertone of amusement hid in her voice.

"You'll have to pick a specific day." Nudging her gently with his broad shoulders Patrick nearly heaved off a sigh of relief when she leaned against him; quietly offering what he hoped was a truce to end their fight. "So, hungover huh?"

"Four shots of vodka, two shots of tequila and a cider will do that to you I guess."

"So not even the illustrious nurse can avoid hangovers." She whined, looking positively disheveled and unkempt.

“At least not last night. Spur of the moment thing…" Silence befell them and the alpha would of asked why, why would she drink that much; except he felt the sort of truce they had forged was very fragile at the moment and didn't want to anger her again. "I'm sorry." She looked like she'Od blurted it out, though didn’t take it back. Instead some of the tense trepidation of her gaze receded while Patrick sat momentarily stunned into silence. She was sorry? Yes, maybe she’d been foolish in her thinking that she alone could bring down Summick- but that was it. His fault was far more grievous in his own eyes. Patrick had made it sound as if he only wanted her around because she was an obligation.

He had called her weak, while in truth she was just as strong as the rest of the pack- in different ways. She was there to fix them up, patch their hurts and soothe their worries. Mila was the one to keep hope flowing in Patrick’s head for a better kind of life. She was the glue keeping his band of misfits together, and Patrick in his panic that she’d do something stupid and hurt herself- had entirely minimized that. “Mila.” He crooned in a sweet voice, reaching out to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. She glanced up at him out of the corner of her gaze, her cheeks turning the softest shade of pink imaginable.

Like this, so close to her with the scent of sandalwood and wildflowers washing over him, Patrick’s found his wolf hard to control. It urged him to act, take her as his mate as it was meant to be. Shaking those kinds of thoughts out of his head, as her gaze was still quizzically resting on his sharp face. “Don’t apologize. I was in the wrong. I was concerned and just reacted poorly. You’re not the weak link of this pack. You’ve become the glue for all of us. I consider you one of my closest friends. I don’t want you to ever question your place in this pack okay?”

For a moment she remained quiet, her gaze holding him suspended as he waited for an answer. “I know ‘Trick. I’m sorry for yelling at you.” She finally murmured, her voice soft enough for the alpha to have to strain to hear it. She wasn’t done however and shifting on his small mattress continued on. “You know, I went home last night and everything just felt… Wrong. It made me realize that if I somehow lost this pack- lost you… I don’t know what I would do. I don’t want to fight with you, and I just want to put it behind us.” Patrick tried to keep his heartbeat under control at her words. She needed him? His wolf rumbled with a smug sense of joy at this. Mila regarded him with her large gaze, lips ever so slightly agape as she stared up at him; and Patrick was all too aware of how close they were to one another.

“Mila, I need you too. I don’t, I can’t lose you.” His confession was soft, quiet and almost as if he were afraid to breathe it. Without warning she flung herself into his side, cheek resting against his chest while her arms were wrapped around him. For a moment Patrick forgot how to breathe. All he could do was sit in stunned silence until his brain kicked in and timidly he wrapped an arm around her shoulder; holding her to him. They sat like that in silence, taking comfort in one another’s presence and arms until he cleared his throat pulling away from her, his face sobering up. “What are things like out there?” Mila’s face darkened for a moment before she sighed heavily.

“That was the other thing… Last night after what happened to Ian… I just couldn’t sleep.” He remained quiet, sensing there was more to this story than she was telling him so far. “That’s why I’m hungover. I thought if I could just make my brain quiet down, I could forget for a little bit.” She paused, and suddenly let out a bitter laugh. “It didn’t work. I should of known, it’s what my father used to do.” His heart twisted to hear such bitterness in those words, and reaching out Patrick rested his hand on her neck, tilting her face to look at him. ”I just want to take it away.” Patrick thought, his lips pressing together with determination. For a few moments Mila looked… Puzzled. And then all at once her brows snapped together and a soft ”Oh" was drawn from her parted lips as peace began to settle over her face. Of course that meant all her bitterness, anger, and malcontent seeped into his veins, churning in his blood. The blond grit his teeth, and continued this emotional soothing aid until Patrick knew she’d make it through the day.

“There. Now smile for me.” Patrick tried to keep his own smile, though it was eclipsed by all her dark feelings. She complied, her generously curved lips tilting upwards into a pale cherry smile. “Perfect.” Patrick murmured, his voice normally as smooth and fine as whiskey, turned gravelly and husky with desire. His sensitive hearing could pick up the sound of her breathing, hitching in her throat. It would be so simple to lean forward, capture her lips with his- to show Mila the feelings he’d been trying to fight for months.
But he hadn’t said anything about what he wanted, what his wolf wanted and was convinced of. Andy was right- humans fall in love differently. Patrick knew that she was the one he wanted. He and his wolf had fixated on her- he found her to be the one he was chemically predisposed to love. But Patrick thought she deserved more. Deserved a man who she could legally marry, wouldn’t have to keep a secret or dismally disappoint her mother. They could never truly be together, not in the way that Mila deserved.

Before Patrick could close the gap between them, capture her lips against his and commit the feeling to memory, the alpha turned away. Mila gasped softly, as if realizing what could of transpired between them and an awkward silence fell over the pair. Patrick was torn desires to hold her, tell her how he felt, and the desire to run far away from the small obsidian haired nurse. God he could imagine how her lips would taste against his, how her slender body would feel beneath his roaming hands… Mila seemed to shake herself out of a trance as she hurriedly stumbled up from his bed.

“I… I should go check on the others. I only stopped by to make sure everything was okay between us.” Her voice sounded overly cheerful, as if she were trying to hide something behind her voice. Before he could bid her goodbye, Mila let herself out his cell and swiftly her heels clacked against the floor. He listened as she left, leaving him half-hoping and pining, and acutely aware Mila's presence. It was an ache in his bones that only she could chase away. How his cell was disgustingly quiet and stale without her presence. Closing his eyes, leaning against the wall as he sat in his bed, Patrick tuned into the pack bond monitoring each one through the bond, making sure all ran smoothly while he was held in the confinement cell he called home, staring morosely at the door, aware of the sense he was waiting for something, though of what he couldn't quite place, leaving him in quiet wonder until Mila came to let him out for dinner with the pack.