Canon

I change into three different outfits before Niall texted me saying he was right outside. I slide down the glossy, wooden flooring in my socks to answer the door. My mom is busy setting the table while Elijah is happily babbling from his seat. As the doorbell rings my dad comes in from the patio setting his burgers down on the table. Niall stands in the archway, with his hands shoved into the pockets of his black bomber jacket. 

'Hi,' I smile pulling him through the doorway by both his hands. 'Are you hungry?' 

'Starving.' Niall lets out an exasperated laugh before dropping my hands to greet my parents who were quickly approaching. 'Hello ma'am.' He safely goes to my mom first. 

'Hello Niall - good to see you.' She kindly replies and turns to head back to the kitchen, 'dinner will be finished in a few, make yourself comfortable.' 

'Thank you,' he calls after her, extending a slow hand out to my dad, ‘Chief.' 

'Hello.' My dad simply says. I quickly process the tone as soon as the word falls from his lips. There wasn't any annoyance or smugness, he almost seemed sincere surprisingly enough. 

'Did you still want to talk?' Niall runs a hand over the nape of his neck nervously. 

'Yes.' I grab him by his impressively smooth hand, pulling him down the hall to my room. 'I have some news.' I sit down on my bed while he takes the chair beside me. 

'Good news, or bad news?' He wonders raising a dark eyebrow.

'Well that depends on how you look at things.' I coyly reply rolling over on the bed to find my admissions letter from Georgetown. 

'Its ready guys!' My mom's voice rings at the base of the hallway. I groan heavily meeting his bright blue eyes as he studies my face for an answer. 

'Lets get out there before your dad comes in looking for us.' He smiles slapping his knees as he stands, 'just tell me your news after.' 

I find a spot beside Elijah and across from my dad while Niall pulls on the chair beside me. For a few moments the only sound was Elijah's mumbles and my dad beating the bottom of the spicy ketchup bottle to compliment his homemade fries. His eyes are fixated on Niall as he holds up the beer bottle in his palm. 

'I would like to start this dinner with a special toast,' he speaks causing Niall and my mom to hold up their glasses, 'This toast is for my incredible daughter who got into the school of her dreams - Georgetown.' The moment the final word falls from his lips I could feel Niall's eyes directly on me. A short, incredulous huff comes his chair as he holds his glass carefully in his hand, 'I am so proud of you, Lizard. Georgetown are some lucky bastards, excuse my language, to get my little girl. You've worked your ass off studying all of those hours and it's finally paid off. I might have to think about transferring over to Washington just to be close to you.'

'The girl hasn't left yet Brad and you're already talking about following her.' My mom stifles out a laugh shaking her head at him, 'we're are so proud of you Liz.' 

'To Lizette.' My dad finally finishes off his toast allowing everyone to eat.

'To Lizette.' Niall repeats in a mumble taking a long swig of his drink. 

'So, Niall have you heard back from schools yet?' My mom inquires, striking up the conversation. 

'Yes, ma'am a few so far, the two of us both heard back from NYU.'

My dad curiously sits up in his seats, suddenly intrigued by Niall's news. A small smile plays on his face, with an expression I couldn't decipher. 

'That's amazing,' my mom muses happily, 'what are you thinking about studying?' 

'I'm not sure just yet, I might not go.' His round eyes glancing down at me. 

"I might not go" - what does he mean he might not go? Of course, I remember him talking about a leap year to spend time with Jack but why does this suddenly feel so personal? I could've sworn he said the mere four words solely to taunt me. They circled in my mind over and over again during dinner. My dad carefully watches me from his seat, not overtaking the conversation as he did before. He finishes off his beer before lifting Elijah into his arms. The two of them wander off into the living room after saying his goodnight. My mom's already in the kitchen loading the dishwasher the moment the plates leave the table.

'So that's where you get that from.' Niall breathes out a laugh gesturing towards my mom in the kitchen. 

'I learn from the best.' I proudly say standing up from the table to walk him out. 

'So Georgetown, huh?' He wonders with a somber tone, pressing his back against the passenger side door. Tonight his classic black mustang looked extra shiny, I'm guessing he washed it within the last few days. 'You didn't tell me that you applied there.'

'I didn't tell anyone,' I interject immediately, 'I applied just to see if they'd accept me - I didn't think they'd actually would.' 

The cool air blows harshly between us, Niall said nothing else so neither did I. He runs a hand across the light stubble on his face as he pushes himself off the car. I smile to myself at the height difference as he fills the few steps of space between us.

‘Georgetown.' He repeats with a nod, standing in front of me. Niall silently places a firm hand against my back to push me into his chest. ‘Isn’t that in D.C.?’

'It's only four hours from NYU and even shorter by plane, we can still see each other nearly all the time.' I insist holding onto him tightly. Wanting to keep him with me for as long as I could. 

'I don't know, Lizette - there's Jack now. It was different before now I just feel like I'm missing out all the time.' 

For a few seconds I stay silent. I couldn't ask him to not spend time with Jack just because I wanted him close to me. He exhales heavily against my hair running his hands up and down my back. 

‘It’s only nine hours from here, almost two hours in the air.’

‘Only nine hours.’ He pulls back to make a face down at me, clearly unconvinced. ‘You’d be so wrapped up with class and the new environment, you’d definitely not want to drive nine hours just to see me.’

‘I think we can make it work, don’t you?’

‘For the first couple of weeks we’d make it work.’ He starts, suddenly not in my grasp anymore. He’s back against the car, his toned arms folded securely across his chest. ‘Then there’s the chaos of being with new people in a new place, you’ll have assignments and papers. We’ll miss a few scheduled FaceTime dates and end up exchanging robotic texts every other day just to say goodnight or sorry I missed your call. Eventually, even the texts will stop – they’ll be cut down to one or two every couple of days. Finally, we’ll both realize that it isn’t working and we had fun while it lasted.’ Niall rambles on and on, rocking back and forth on the heels of his shoes.

‘So that’s it,’ I murmur, my chest tightening, ‘you sound like you’re giving up on us before we even try to make things work.’

‘I’m just saving you the trouble Lizette.’

‘How nice of you.’ I scoff, abruptly offended. ‘I’m glad you think enough of me to make my own decisions about what I do with my life.’

‘You know it’s not like that.’

Another long pause washes over the two of us. I stare at Niall while he stares at his shoes as his long leg swings back and forth. I open my mouth to speak only to shut it again. Were we actually breaking up right now? My mouth felt annoyingly dry watching him fetch his keys out the pocket of his jacket.

‘Maybe I should go.’ He mutters, already in the process of walking around the back of the car. Niall stops at the driver’s side to eventually glance up at me.

‘Maybe you should.’ I stupidly fight back, rushing in the house before he could hear the quiver in my voice. My parents not so subtlety retreat from the window as I push my way into the house. I decide against placing the blame on them for suggesting Niall come over, knowing that tonight was inevitable. He would have had the same reaction even at a different venue.

The next morning the last thing I wanted to do was sit in class with Niall, let alone three. I tossed and turned all night fighting the urge to pick up my phone and press his name. During breakfast I pushed around the cereal in my bowl soundlessly eyeing the clock. I could skip but I couldn’t stay home without my parents asking a thousand questions. I made sure to fill Rose in on it nearly as soon as I went into my room last night, so of course she stood at the door of homeroom waiting.

‘There you are!’ She forcefully pulls me into her arms, ‘I thought for a second you wouldn’t show.’

‘You know how my parents get – I couldn’t stay there.’

‘Did he even give a reason of why he wasn’t going to NYU?’ Rose demands, following me to my chair. I promised Niall I wouldn’t tell her about Jack so I didn’t.

‘No.’ Nearly as soon as the word left my mouth, Niall strolls in dropping down into the seat in front of me. He doesn’t say anything so I stubbornly turn in my chair away from him. If he wasn’t budging, neither was I.

Trigonometry was the same. He sat behind me the entire period without making a single crack about Dr. Werner. I struggled with the last problem but fought the urge to ask him for help. The moment class was over, I gather up my things to go to art. When I turn in the hall I notice he was already gone the other way, his green backpack slung over one of his shoulders. He always walked me to class. Always. The fact that he was taking this whole thing so much better than me was numbing. After everything we been through, I was already gone in his mind. I decide to go off campus for lunch not wanting to see Rose and Zayn attack each other’s faces anymore. Louis sneaks out the side of the gym door to cut through the parking lot already fishing a cigarette out of his sweatpants. I slow my steps trying to see where exactly he was sneaking off to when he comes to a stop in front of big, blacked out SUV. From the front I could see John while Louis dived into the backseat. The passenger’s window eases its way down revealing him. Damon.

‘Lizzie – long time no see, huh?’ He grins wildly extending a hand out of the car.