An Idiot’s Guide to Not Falling in Love with Your Best Friend’s Girlfriend

“Luke! Hey mate, are you coming out tonight?”

I looked up from the bowl of cereal in front of me, dropping the spoon into the milk, I gave one of my best friends a death glare.

“Man it is 7:30 in the fucking morning. Why are you asking me what I’m doing tonight? I shouldn’t even be alive right now.”

Calum raised an eyebrow, while pouring milk over Fruit Loops in his own bowl. “Well that’s dramatic. So you coming? Mae is going to be there, and she wants to meet you so it would be cool if you came.”

“Why does your girlfriend want to meet me? Is she trying to get it in?”

“Not with you. You’re the only one of the guys she hasn’t met yet, besides, you need to get your ass out of the house. You and that girl weren’t even serious. It’s time to move on from... I can’t even remember her name, that’s how not serious it was.”

A smile tugged the corner of my lips upward. “Alicia, she was fantastic in bed, and I couldn’t give fewer fucks about her, because that’s all she was, I just don’t like people.”

“Well, you’re going to like them tonight. You’re coming out.”

“Does Mae have any hot friends?”

“Hm…” Calum ran his hand through his hair, “don’t know. I’ll ask.”

----------------------

The concert I had been dragged to was some local band I’d never even heard of. They sounded OK, and I had a drink in hand, so the night wasn’t a complete failure just yet. Ashton stood beside me, talking to Michael about something while I surveyed the scene, searching for someone attractive to potentially take home. Seeing nothing, I turned my attention to the boys.

“So you guys have met Mae right? What’s she like?”

“Hot!” Michael shouts, taking a sip from the bottle in his hand and slowly allowing his sobriety to slip away.

“Really?”

“Yeah, she is,” a much more sober Ashton replies, “she’s pretty cool too. Cal didn’t do a bad job. We’ll see how long she hangs around though. I can’t completely tell yet, but she doesn’t seem like the type that would be willing to do a long distance thing.”

“He is not bringing his fucking girlfriend on tour.”

“I think he’s aware of that. Without us even saying anything he knows--”

Ashton continued speaking but I became distracted by a girl with dark blonde hair crossing the room.

Her hair fell to the middle of her back and she wore a striped, loose fitting dress that cut at mid thigh. She’s the one coming home tonight.

“Shut up, Ash. I’ve got more important people to talk to.”

Ashton followed my gaze and when his eyes landed on her he began laughing.

“Are you serious right now? You’ll never get her in a million years.”

“The fuck makes you think that?”

“MAE! GET OVER HERE!” Michael shouted, tossing his hands wildly in the air. Dark blonde and stripes came right over to us and Michael enveloped her in a huge hug.

“Hey guys!” She said cheerfully, her voice was soft and smooth. I decided I liked it. Cal probably did too, mother fuck.

She spoke briefly with the other two before coming to me.

“So you must be the famous Luke Hemmings that I’ve heard so much about but never actually met.

Why don’t you ever come out with us?”

Her eyes locked on mine was kind of unnerving, but I kept cool and shook it off.

“I’m a bit of a homebody I guess. Besides, you’re always out to see bands. I’m in a fucking band, I am literally a part of that all the time.”

“Well then, next time I guess we’ll have to hit up a bingo night so you join us out on the town.” She smirked and lightly punched me on the shoulder. “Where is my boyfriend? You guys are great, but uh, I’ve kind of got a thing for the other one.”

“We ran into his cousin and her fiancé outside, I think he’s catching up with them. They were at the bar the last time I saw them.”

“That’s probably a nightmare, I’m going to go save him, I’ll catch up with you guys in a bit.” She winked at me before saying goodbye and disappearing into the crowd.

“Michael you were not kidding. She is so hot.”

“I know! I’ve asked Cal to share so many times and he refuses. I think he loves her or some bullshit.”

The three of us shared a laugh and continued watching the band play.

“Watch yourself man,” Ash shot me a warning glance, “you don’t get this one.”

“This will be like all of Cal’s other relationships: short and forgettable.”

“I don’t know about that, something seems <i>different</i>” Ashton put air quotes around different,

“I think he actually does love her.”

“Well if that’s the case then I’ll stay away. I mean, she’s hot but not that hot.”

I took another swig of my drink as I watched she and Cal move in our direction. She held his hand, leading him over to us before he spun her around, picked her up and kissed her.

“Hey this is a bar! Not a romantic comedy!” I shouted in their direction. Cal continued kissing her while managing to flip me off.

My eyes moved down her body, Cal’s arms around her tightened her dress in all the right places and I found myself not being able to stop staring. Girls that were considered off limits but weren’t actually off limits were my favorite to go after. This one was absolutely untouchable and because of it, I was that much more interested. A bottle of lotion and my thoughts were the closest I’d ever get to her.

“I’d stop staring man, he’s going to notice.” Ashton said, a giant, shit eating grin lighting up his face, “that’s why you’ll never get her in a million years.”