Ready to Live

We all decided to head to Diesel and continue on with the great fun we were having like I had hoped. Mason went on hunting for a guy to dance with, just as James went looking for a girl to dance with. Brandon and I were left at the bar waiting for our drinks.

"You know how crazy it was, seeing you and James at the same restaurant on the same night?"

"Absolutely, so you were saying you were celebrating tonight? Something big?"

I wouldn't tell him what it was, that it was just something big.

"Yeah... I don't know how I feel about telling you, but I feel it's a topic I'd rather just tell you without James or anyone who isn't Mason being around."

"Whether you want to or don't want to is okay either way. I'm just curious."

"I need to. Shortly after I got my job at Heinz Hall, I was at an art museum with a friend and met a guy who worked there and was adorable. Not too long after I met, we began dating and things were wonderful, absolutely perfect. He was such a nice and amazing guy for only a year; the past six months have been hell though. When he became angry the first time, I hugged Mason before I came in the door after work. Even though I told him as a smartass, he was gay and that he liked men, he threatened me about him hitting me the next time I 'misbehaved', knocking me on my ass. He hit me for the first time the following week when I had kissed Mason on one cheek and he kissed me on the other; you know how there are people who do that in foreign countries. I was being a smartass again and he struck me across the face. The final straw came just a few days ago. He hit me when I talked about my dislike of a guy who hit on me. The following day, I talked to Mason about leaving him; we got my things during lunch today and that's why we celebrated today." I said, smiling during the second to last sentence.

"Wow. That's crazy." he said dumbfounded.

"Tell me about it. Growing up in a volatile environment to an abusive relationship seven years after I move here."

"Volatile environment?"

"I'm not ready to talk about that."

"That's okay."

"Thank you. That's even harder for me to talk about."

"I'm gonna ask this again. Am I free to hug you?"

I laughed.

"Of course."

I ordered another drink after we hugged.

"Can I tell you something?" I asked.

"Of course."

"I don't know that much about hockey."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I didn't know who you and James were until Mason saw you guys."

"I never would've guessed."

"That's good to know. I don't even watch sports."

"None?"

"Zero."

"Might have to change that."

"We do?"

"Absolutely."

"Well, I'm up for that."

"That's good to know."

"When do you plan on doing that?"

"How does tomorrow sound?"

I smirked.

"So, how do you wanna do this?"

"Since you don't have your own apartment, how about we watch a game at my place?"

"Sounds good. Wanna order pizza?"

"Absolutely."

After maybe an hour of talking, a visibly drunk Mason wrapped his arms around my neck and kissed my cheek.

"Hi Sasha."

"Hi Mason. Having a good time?"

"Fantastic!" he said, cheering.

I couldn't help but laugh.

"Are you?"

"Absolutely. I'm having a wonderful time."

He cheered again.

"Mason, how many beers have you had?"

"Four!"

"It's only been an hour."

He shrugged.

"I can handle it."

He can't. He's done this before. I'm the one that can hold my liquor.

"Ok. Whatever you say." I said, shaking my head.

Brandon laughed too.

"Have you seen James lately?" Brandon asked him.

"Maybe ten minutes ago? He was having quite the time with a busty blonde."

"He loves blondes, especially ones who have an amazing rack." he said rolling his eyes.

I laughed again.

"I hope I have a ride if he goes home with her."

"You'll have me. I was planning on being the designated driver anyway."

Turns out, James did go home with her, which Brandon did predict. He received a text from him around ten minutes later saying that Brandon was gonna need a ride and that he was sorry. When it came time for us to leave, I was honestly sad. Who knew when I was gonna see him next?

"I'll call you tomorrow. Okay?" he asked.

"Okay. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"Bye."

"Bye."

And with a hug, he walked out of the car and made his way to the front door of his gorgeous house. Once I knew he was in, I put my foot on the gas and began the drive to Mason's apartment.

"Are you two still hanging out tomorrow?" Mason said, managing not to slur any of his words.

"He's gonna school me on hockey tomorrow at his house. I told him about me not knowing who he and James were and the fact that I don't watch any sports."

"That's gonna be fun."

"...and I can't wait."

When I was eating my breakfast of blueberry pancakes, bacon and apple juice, I received a text...a text that I'd been dreading.

Where the fuck are you? Why is all your stuff gone? If you don't get a hold of me by noon, I'm gonna go looking for you.

It was 9. My heart began racing.

"Mason..."

He was sitting beside me, eating as well.

"Read." I said sliding over my phone.

"Everything's gonna be fine."

"How can you say that? He's gonna look here first."

I was on the verge of tears.

"Listen to me. He's not gonna lay a damn hand on you. I promise."

"Those kinds of promises are hard to keep. No offense."

"None taken and I understand. Well, here's one I'll always keep. I'll always love you."

"I love you too, Mace."

"So, what do you wanna do?"

"I-I don't know. I should just face my fears and wait for him to find me..."

"Whatever you wanna do is fine with me."

My phone vibrated again.

Oh, God. What is it now?

I know we're watching hockey tonight, but I was hoping we could go out for lunch? If you don't want to, that's okay. It's gotta be crazy hanging out last night and then, almost all day the next day.

I smiled and laughed.

"I know what I wanna do."

"What?"

I slid my phone over as I kept a smile on my face as I drank more of my juice.

"He's adorable."

"Tell me about it."

"You like him."

I rolled my eyes and ignored him.

"So, what are you gonna wear?"

"What I was planning on wearing. That long sleeve white top that you love so much? And a nice pair of jeans with my black and white flats."

"Ugh. I do! Perfect top and perfect outfit!"

Sounds great! How does noon sound?

Ten seconds later...

Sounds perfect! I'll pick you up at that time then?

Yep. See ya then!

"What time?"

"He's gonna pick me up at noon."

"When Mason's gonna go looking for you?"

I nodded.

"And if he finds me, he finds me. If I need to call the police, I will."

"And if you need me, please call me?"

"Of course, hun. I will. You're the number one person in my life."

He smiled at that and hugged me.

"That means a lot. You have no idea."

Come noon, I was ready and sitting on the couch waiting for him. The second I heard him knock on the door, I got a huge grin on my face and practically jumped off the couch; Mason laughed at me. I answered the door with a toned down smile.

"Hey." I said.

"Hey. How are you?"

"Good. How are you?"

"Good. Ready?"

"Absolutely."

"Hey Mason!"

Mason was walking into the kitchen.

"Hey Brandon. How are you man?" he asked walking toward him.

"Good, good. You? Have a hangover?"

He definitely did.

"Yeah, but it's not as bad as I thought it'd be. You take good care of her. Okay? And have fun too!"

You take good care of her. Okay?

I couldn't believe he said it. He...

"You sound like you're my father..." I said drifting off.

I then went and hugged him.

"Thank you for actually sounding like one." I whispered into his ear.

He knew what I was referring to. He sounded like the opposite of my father to tell you the truth. He actually gave a fuck about me, about my well-being.

"See you later, Mason. Have a great day!" I said after letting go.

"Will do. Love you, hun."

"Love you, too."

The second we got in his car, my phone vibrated and my stomach dropped.

You better be scared. I will find you.

I gulped and had to take a deep breath.

"Are you okay?"

"Um..."

"Sasha?"

"Yeah. I'm fine."

"I don't mean to be an asshole..."

And you're not.

"...but I really don't think you are."

"My ex is wondering the fuck I am and told me this morning if I didn't get a hold of him by noon, he'd come looking for me. He just said that I better be scared and he will find me."

"I doubt he will."

"Well, I kinda wanna face him. Get it over with. Perhaps, I could call the cops on him."

"Whatever you wanna do. I'll support it."

"I'm so happy to hear it."

"There's something else I wanna ask you."

"Shoot."

"You told Mason he was treating like he was your father, but you drifted off."

"I never had a great father growing up. From five on, he was physically and emotionally abusive. It was a miracle that I made it out alive. I've never gone back home after I graduated high school."

"Never?"

"Never. I just can't. I refuse. All that's there's is negativity."

"I can't believe that about your father. How was your mother?"

"She was a victim and still is. She says she doesn't have the guts to leave. I'm scared for her."

"Do you ever try to get a hold of her?"

"I do, but it's hard to. He's almost always there."

"I hope there'll be some way for her to escape."

Escape. I had used that word before when I was ready to escape from Luke.

"Me too."

"So, where do you wanna eat?"

I suggested my favorite restaurant, a restaurant that Luke knew I loved the most. I figured it was a likely place for him to look for me. When he thought that it sounded good, I let out a happy sigh.

"This is a great restaurant." he said as we sat down in our booth.

"Thanks. It's the first one I ever went to when I moved to Pittsburgh."

"Really? When did you move here?"

"Yeah. Six years ago... after high school graduation, literally. I needed out of here as soon as I could do so."

"Where'd you stay your first night... oh, wait. Stupid question."

"No, no. It's actually a great question. I have a cousin who lives here, so she let me stay with her until I had a job and an apartment."

"Sounds like a great cousin. Did you still keep in contact with her?"

"I do. I talk to her several times a week and we try to hangout when we both can. She actually comes to Heinz Hall when she's able to."

"That's awesome."

"I'm so glad to have her in my life. Just like Mason, I couldn't imagine her not being a huge part of my life. They make me so loved, it's crazy. There's more love there than there ever was in my household growing up."

Before I could even hear him respond, we were interrupted by our waiter.

"That's crazy."

"...with a capital C." I said beginning to laugh.

He laughed as well.

"So, enough about me. How was your life growing up?"

"Great. I started playing hockey when I was four; what made it more awesome is that there were/are men in my family that play or have played hockey. I played whenever I could. I just couldn't imagine how life would've been if I didn't have family that were involved in hockey."

"Any NHLers?"

"My dad and five uncles played. Now, I have four cousins that play, but only one of my cousins has played in the NHL."

"Holy shit. That is awesome."

To have that many family members who've been hockey players, whether they've been in the NHL or not is nothing short of amazing. After putting in our food order, he spoke up again.

"Hey, what if he doesn't find you?"

"Sooner or later, he will. There are only so many places I can be."

"I really hate that. It scares me."

"You know I'll be fine."

"I know. I just- you're my friend and after hearing what has happened in your life, I don't want you to get hurt."

My heart melted. The man hardly knows me and cares about me so much already.

"You're sweet. I'd kiss your cheek if I wasn't sitting here."

"I can wait."

"Shut up." I said laughing.

He laughed as well.

"But I'll probably kiss your cheek later."

The lunch went well, seeing as Luke didn't show up, but I am expecting him to find me today. Mason called me when we were leaving the restaurant.

"Sasha?" he said in a panicked voice.

"Mason? What's wrong?"

Brandon stopped in his tracks.

"Luke-he's..."

"He's what? Please tell me, hun."

"He's pounding on the door."

My heart was racing.

"Mason, we'll be right there. Okay? Just let him in and tell him I'll be there in fifteen-twenty minutes."

"Are you sure?"

"100%. Don't worry and don't forget that I have Brandon with me."

"Ok. I'll see you soon, hun."

"See ya."

I took a deep breath, held it in for a second and then let it out.

"We're going back to Mason's. Luke's knocking at his door and I told him to let him in and to tell my ex that I'd be there in fifteen-twenty minutes."

"I gotta say. I wanna hear what this asshole has to say."

I laughed and we finished the walk to his car. My heart was pounding the entire ride there. Luke's car was in front of Mason's apartment, so we pulled behind it before getting out. I had to take another deep breath as I turned the knob to enter his place. What was about to take place was something I never wanted to experience again.