Keep on Going

Kennedy kept his eyes on Kacey as he played. When he wasn’t focused on the notes he had to play, or jamming with one of his bandmates during a particularly fun guitar riff, his eyes stayed glued almost exclusively on her.

Kacey found it hard to look away from his stare as it was so intense. She found herself blushing on more than one occasion when it happened. She had to keep her gaze down on her drink or on any of the other guys on stage. Her and Kennedy kept having a stare down and it was making her nervous. She was barely able to concentrate on what they actually sounded like because she was so caught up in her insecurities. “I can’t like him,” she kept telling herself throughout the set. Despite her internal pep talk, she knew she couldn’t wish away her feelings.

Kennedy’s gaze was unwavering as he would stare at her with an almost cocky smirk on his face as he played. He wanted Kacey to like what they played. He wanted to impress her. More than anything, he just wanted her to fit in with his life. Why this particular girl and why now? He couldn’t say. There was something about her that begged to be included. If he could incorporate her into his life, he would. It was already going well as the rest of the guys already liked her, or at least seemed to. Like Garrett had mentioned before, once she went to a show, she was part of the group. He wanted her to be part of not only their group, but every aspect of his life.

That thought alone scared him to death. He still didn’t understand why this quirky girly girl that he barely knew was forging herself into his thoughts, but he couldn’t help but let it happen. For the time being, he just wanted to continue to get to know her and attempt to figure her out. She kept surprising him and nothing she did was ever expected. His goal had quickly become to learn what he could about her. As he watched her from stage, that’s exactly what he kept trying to do. He found himself getting caught up in her reactions and facial expressions, hoping that she was enjoying the show.

Kacey found herself unable to look away from his unwavering stare as they were almost daring the other to look away. She was wishing the alcohol in her system would give her the burst of courage she needed to keep his stare and not back down. Or at the very least hold his gaze long enough for him to turn away first. They seemed to make a game out of it; seeing who would look away first.

When John announced that they were about to play their last song, Kacey shook herself from her Kennedy-induced haze, and decided to consciously focus on the music. Forcing her eyes away from Kennedy, she decided instead to turn her attention to Garrett strutting around the stage. She found his enthusiasm and energy amusing; especially as he came close to the edge of the stage a few too many times.

The song ended soon enough and from what she actually, consciously, paid attention to, she enjoyed what she heard. Granted, the stare of the bearded guitarist standing a few feet in front of her made the experience a bit challenging.

All of the guys went to the front of the stage and began throwing out pics, setlists, and drum sticks. Kennedy walked directly in front of her, and leaned down with a wink as he handed her his guitar pick.

Kacey accepted it with a blush on her cheeks as he continued to throw out his picks. Kacey ignored Abby’s laughter from beside her at the series of events that have unfolded.

The guys exited the stage and John announced that they would be outside to meet everyone after.

The crowd around them began to disperse, but not without a few hateful glares being cast in hers and Abby’s direction. Once the crowd cleared enough for them to breathe, they both turned their backs to the stage and leaned against the barricade.

Abby let out a dramatic sigh.

“Don’t say it,” Kacey grumbled.

“What?” she chuckled. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Kacey turned her head and glared at her.

“Fiiiine. I just don’t understand why you’re fighting this so much. It’s obvious that you two are into each other. Why are you so against this? I thought you liked him.”

Kacey sighed, “I do, it’s just...I can’t like him.”

Abby groaned, “Oh god, don’t tell me…”

“He doesn’t believe in true love.”

“Here we go,” Abby groaned.

“I just, I can’t be with someone who doesn’t believe in love. That’s so against everything I am.”

“Ya know, for someone who is so desperate for love, you sure are picky. Must you always find something ‘wrong’ with every single guy you come across?” Abby reasoned.

“No, but I would actually consider Kennedy if he didn’t stomp on everything I believe in.”

“Oh don’t be so dramatic. You’re making it sound like he’s some illogical, uncaring tyrannt which we both know he’s not. Admit it, he’s the sweetest guy you’ve ever met. Not to mention he’s not afraid to give you shit about stuff as well as take yours.”

Kacey meekly shrugged. “I know, but I don’t see us ever being anything more than friends. However our friendship won’t be for naught.”

“What do you mean?...” Abby trailed off.

“I’m going to prove to him that true love exists. That the love we read about and have dreamed about as kids does exist. It’s not all fairy tales.”

“Kace, you can’t go ‘round forcing your beliefs on love onto everyone. Sooner or later you’re gonna have to accept that not everyone is gonna buy into it. Ya gotta let it stop botherin’ ya so much.”

“I know, and I do,” she mumbled. “However I can’t shake that I have to convince him it exists. I can’t explain it, but it’s almost like we were forced together so I can prove to him that true love exists.”

“Oh god, you’ve been watching Hallmark movies again haven’t you? We are cancelling cable so you can stop that--”

“Ugh, it’s not the Hallmark movies,” she mumbled. “Though don’t cancel it because I love those movies so much. That’s beside the point. I just feel the need to show him that true love exists. I don’t know how, but it’s gonna happen. I’m determined to prove it to him if it kills me.”

“Wow, no need to be so dramatic. So, do you wanna hang around and talk to the guys or…?”

Kacey sighed, “Let’s just go home. I’ll text Kennedy later. I just don’t know if I can face him right now. The more I’m around him, the harder it is to not have feelings for him.”

Abby rolled her eyes, “Fine, let’s go.”

The two girls made their way to Abby’s car and headed home.

Kennedy peaked his head out from behind the stage and saw the two girls braced against the barricade after the show and went to join the rest of the guys in the green room to cool off. As soon as he stepped into the room, they all started cheering for him.

“Looks like Kenny’s got eyes for Claire!” John teased.

Kennedy shot him a look.

“Aw, c’mon Ken, it’s not a bad thing,” John defended.

“I don’t have a thing for Kacey,” Kennedy admitted through gritted teeth.

“Could’ve had me fooled,” Jared chuckled. “You couldn’t keep your eyes off her.”

Kennedy just shook their words off as he grabbed a towel and stepped outside. The warm Arizona air was suffocating, yet comforting as he leaned against the wall of the venue. He wiped his face down and stood there, still catching his breath from performing. The other guys followed him out not long after, and dragged him along to go greet the fans.

The entire time, Kennedy kept scanning the crowd in hopes of spotting Kacey or Abby. Much to his dismay he never found them. He continued meeting the fans, but kept an eye out for the pair of girls. He stayed until every fan had left and pulled out his phone, finding it free of notifications. He looked around and still never saw Kacey or Abby. Slightly defeated, he went to join the guys as they left to grab celebratory drinks as per tradition post-show.

Kennedy sat at the bar and swirled his glass of beer around as they all sat around the table talking. He found himself not as into their tradition as he normally was. He kept his gaze focused on the bottom of his glass, occasionally taking a sip before resuming the therapeutic swirling of his drink. A pint of beer into his night, he found the courage he had been lacking to text Kacey.

Hey Kace, so I looked for you after the show and never saw you. Were we that bad?

He set his phone down, keeping his gaze on his phone as he waited for her reply.

Kacey and Abby were on their way back to their apartment when her phone buzzed, lighting up with a new text message. She saw who it was from and left it alone for the time being.

“What, are you gonna ignore lover boy now?” Abby asked.

Kacey scoffed, “No, I just don’t feel like answering him right now. Is that such a bad thing?”

“Maybe. He probably thinks you hated the show.”

Kacey didn’t reply.

“You didn’t hate it did you?” Abby tentatively asked.

“No, what I consciously heard I liked, but I don’t know. It’s like I told you, the more I talk to him, the harder it is to push these feelings away.”

Abby accepted her answer, despite not liking it, and let it be. She knew Kacey would come around eventually.

Kennedy kept his eyes glued to his phone, unlocking it every few seconds to make sure he hadn’t missed her text. For some reason, her leaving without saying goodbye made him a bit paranoid.

Kacey and Abby arrived back to their place and got ready for bed. Kacey changed into her giant sweatshirt and a pair of pajama shorts before wiping off her makeup and pulling her hair up in a ponytail to sleep in. She grabbed her phone from where she sat it on the dresser and moved to sit on her bed. With a sigh, she unlocked her phone and replied to Kennedy’s message.

Kennedy was growing more and more nervous the longer Kacey went without replying. The more alcohol he drank, the more paranoid he became. By this point, he was past reasoning logically with and he was determined that she no longer wanted to be friends with him. Those thoughts quickly moved aside when he saw his phone illuminate with a text from her. He fumbled to unlock it as he read through her reply.

My Damsel in Distress: No, you guys were great. I wasn’t feeling well.

He looked at her message and kept reading and rereading it as his less-than-sober mind tried to comprehend its meaning. Once he could successfully comprehend what she was trying to say, his blurry eyes and clumsy fingers, fumbled to make a reply.

Sorry to hear that. Are you alright? Anything I can get you?

Kacey heard her phone buzz again and she was afraid to see what his response was. She unlocked her phone and saw his reply. Tears slightly filled her eyes as she read his response. Of course he would be the sweet, protector guy she had always dreamed of. She threw her phone down to the other end of her bed as she left his reply alone. She couldn’t respond, afraid he would find her and try to help her feel better. Was that such a bad thing? Surely it couldn’t have been, but she knew nice guys like Kennedy always spelled trouble for her. This one in particular was already becoming too much of a fixture in her life and she’d known him barely over a week. Now, here she was crying over a simple text of him checking up on her. She couldn’t take it. She didn’t want to completely blow him off, but she had to try and distance herself from him. For the time being, she opted to keep her answers and replies at a minimum and hoped he would take a hint. Right now, distance would be the only way to rid herself of her feelings for him.

Kacey leaned forward, grabbing her phone from the end of her bed, and typed a reply before turning it on silent and plugging it in on her nightstand. She wouldn’t answer any more of his texts the rest of the night and she just wanted to shut him out at the moment. So she turned off her lights, rolled over, and went to sleep.

Kennedy went into a panic once again when she didn’t instantly reply. From what little he had texted her, she was always one to reply right away and he hated that that wasn’t the case tonight. He went back to his routine of checking his phone every few seconds.

“Dude, expecting a call from someone?” Pat asked, trying to stifle a chuckle.

“Uh, sorta,” Kennedy mumbled. He didn’t want to get into his paranoid anticipation waiting for a text reply from Kacey.

“Lemme guess, are you waiting on a text from Claire?” John teased.

“No, Bender,” Kennedy mocked back. “Why does it matter to you so much?”

“No need to get defensive. You two just seem to really dig each other. I think she’d be good for you.”

“Yeah well, it’s not gonna happen.”

“Why do you say that?”

“I just don’t like her like that alright? Is it so terrible that there’s a girl I want to only be friends with? I mean, god, you guys are always trying to pair me up with any single girl you come across.”

The guys all stared at Kennedy, a bit taken-aback by his outburst. He had never gotten this defensive over a relationship of any kind before. This new guarded side of Kennedy was definitely confusing them as they weren’t sure what to make of it. They left it alone after that and continued back into their own conversations.

Kennedy once again resumed his game of paranoid waiting as he sipped on what was probably his third tall glass of beer. His phone lit up once again. He tried to discreetly open it up without appearing as anxious as he felt.

My Damsel in Distress: I’m fine

Kennedy didn’t know much about females, but he knew whenever a girl replied with “I’m fine”, no matter the situation, that she was anything but fine. His mind went into overdrive as he tried to analyze what could have possibly gone wrong that night. She seemed to get along with the guys, so it couldn’t have been that. She got her drinks, so it wasn’t because she was without. She seemed to be enjoying the show enough as she held his gaze with a smile, throughout their set. He had no idea what was going on.

Are you sure you’re alright?

He waited the rest of the night they were at the bar and never received another reply. He decided to try again as they entered the taxi.

Kace, you know you can talk to me if there’s something bothering you right? We’re friends remember?

The short ride from the bar to his house was torturous. He wasn’t drunk, but just miserable enough to be annoyed and have a slight hangover the next day. That wasn’t even the worst part of his ride home. He still never got a reply from Kacey. His alcohol-induced paranoia was intensified by this point as he was determined to fix whatever was up with Kacey. He wanted their friendship to resume to what it had been. She seemed to be so closed-off suddenly, and he didn’t know why.

Once the taxi pulled up to his house, he paid his fare, and stumbled towards his house. He fumbled through his pockets for his keys, and held them up to the porch light to find the right one. Upon finding it, he put it in the door and clumsily stepped inside. He swayed over to the couch and collapsed on it, too exhausted and dizzy to make it the additional twenty yards to his room. He pulled his phone out of his pocket. No new messages. He opted to give it one last go for the night before going to sleep. Hopefully she would reply in the morning at the very least.

Kace, I get it if you don’t wanna talk about it, but please let me know if I did something or if I can help you. I still wanna be able to rescue my damsel in distress when she needs me.

He then stumbled to his room and set his phone on the end table next to his bed and fell asleep.