Wasting All These Tears

“Welcome to Hawaii.”

Mallory smiled politely at the man as he held her hand, helping her out of the van that had picked them all up from the airport. She was glad to finally breathe in some fresh air after being in the car for so long. The drive from the airport to the hotel was just about an hour, but it seemed like a day. It was stuffy in the car, too. It wasn’t actually stuffy, but any tight space she had to share with Matt felt like it.

They still weren’t exactly on the best of terms ever since their harsh break-up, only bearing with each other because they shared a social circle. At the beginning of their now six months of separation, the two were almost overly bitter to each other. She was bitter after being cheated on, and well, Matt never had a good reason to be angry with her. Mallory figured it was his frustration whenever she turned him down when he begged for her to take him back. Every now and then, Mallory would have a moment of weakness and then snap back into reality. She was never going to let Matt back in again.

It didn’t matter how many times he called her phone or sent roses to her job or knocked on her door at 3AM when he couldn’t sleep. Mallory had already made up her mind. He hurt her, and he didn’t even deserve a chance to fix things again. Sometime after harsh words were said and Mallory told him for the last time, Matt took a step back. Mallory was glad that he did, and they’d managed to avoid almost all contact with each other until now.

While Mallory’s love life plummeted, Erin and Brian’s were at its peak. The week had finally come for their wedding, and most of their family and friends had flown out over the Pacific for it. Mallory remembered Erin always saying she wanted a a destination wedding; it was like the vacation before the honeymoon. A struggle at first, Mallory had become genuinely happy for the couple.

Mallory would be lying if she said that she didn’t feel a tad bit jealous of the two of them. She thought she’d be the one to get married first. After all, her and Matt had been engaged for longer. Mallory had subscriptions to bridal magazines and she and Matt always talked about what their wedding would be like. Through all of that, Mallory had learned to suck it up and just be supportive and happy for her two friends. That’s all she could do.

“This place is gorgeous,” Meagan said once the group was inside the lobby of the hotel.

Mallory looked around, and it really was a beautiful hotel. Soft, instrumental music played just below the volume of the group’s voices. A few other guests were in the lobby, either heading to the elevator bank or heading out the door. Erin and Brian walked up to the check-in counter to get the group’s room keys.

Mallory stood on the side awkwardly while the rest of the group conversed and talked about all the different excursions they wanted to try while they were there. The group tried to include her in most things, but it seemed like there was always tension when she and Matt were in the same room. Sometimes they didn’t include her at all. Of course they favored Matt over her, except maybe the other girls. Sometimes Mallory wished everything would just go back to normal.

“Hey, Mal,” Johnny got her attention. “You gonna swim with the dolphins with me?”

Mallory appreciated him trying to include her. She gave him a small smile, nodding. She and Johnny had been swimming with dolphins before. “You know it.”

There was a small part of her that would probably never be able to fully forgive the guys and Erin for what they’d done to her. For right now, she was on good terms with most of them or at least she pretended to be. No one ever brought up what had happened between them all; it was like everyone had wiped that part of the past from their brains. It was like everyone expected everything to go back to normal despite Mallory’s humiliation. They all seemed to think that she was supposed to be okay with that. Mallory might have been able to forgive, but she would never forget.

Taking her room key when it was given to her, Mallory started towards the elevator bank with her suitcase. All she really wanted was some sleep. She’d been up half the night tossing around in her sleep from her nerves. Her eyes narrowed when she got to the elevators, turning to press the ‘up’ button for another elevator.

“Mallory.”

She ignored him, hoping another elevator would come soon.

“Mallory.” He spoke up a little louder, his tone more serious.

She rolled her eyes, turning to face him. Matt was standing a few feet away, arm outstretched to hold the elevator’s doors open. He nodded his head for her to come into the elevator he was in.

“Do you really want to wait for another elevator?” He looked annoyed now. “Come get in the fucking elevator.”

Mallory hesitated for a second before she sighed, dragging herself and her suitcase into the empty elevator with him. She made sure to stand the furthest away from him as physically possible.

“God, you’re stubborn,” Matt muttered under his breath as the doors closed. “I don’t bite.”

Mallory held her tongue, glancing at the panel of numbers. The number 7 had already been pressed and Mallory groaned out loud, realizing their rooms must have been on the same floor.

“What?” Matt asked, confused. He sighed to himself when he was ignored.

Her arms crossed over her chest the entire time, Mallory practically flung herself out of the elevator when the doors opened onto the seventh floor. She walked as fast as she could to her room, using the signs on the wall as her guide. She stopped at room 704, digging into her back pocket for her room key. She froze when she heard footsteps and that deep oh, so familiar chuckle from behind her.

“705,” He said, in an almost tauntingly way. “Looks like we’re neighbors.”