Physical Therapy

“AJ, I really do NOT want to go out with you guys.” It was Wednesday, and was the night of AJ’s bachelorette party. She really only had a few close girlfriends in town this early, and she wanted to go out, get silly drunk, and do karaoke. I thought that I had been able to weasel out of it, by trying to tag into Phil’s bachelor party, which really involved guys coming over, playing NHL 94 and being dorks, but AJ wouldn’t stand for it.

“No, come on. I know you will be standing up on Phil’s side on Friday but I really want you out with me, plus I think you are overdue for some girl time.”

She was right, I had spent the past 5 days as their defacto wedding planner, I had no idea how she managed to be Diva’s Champion and organize this wedding on her own up until now. I had called the florist, baker, the venue, and the event “designer” almost daily, hoping to get everything in order so that their day would run perfectly.

And to say it was exhausting would have been an understatement.

“AJ, I just…” I was grasping for straws at this point, “I don’t have anything to wear.”

“You may not have anything to wear…but I do.”

“No, no, no, we aren’t the same size…are we?” Shit, I looked her up and down. She looked like she was about a size smaller than I was, but we had the same build. I am sure I could fit in something she owned.

“Hmm…I am sure I have something.” And just like that, she was off, throwing clothing all over the floor as she worked on finding the perfect outfit for me.

“AJ, I don’t know about this, really. This just feels…so not me.”

“Shut up, you look hot. I love cotton crop tops right now, super comfy and cute.” She pulled me in front of the full-length mirror, I felt like I looked ridiculous.

“I can’t go out wearing this…people will think-“ I couldn’t even imagine what people would think.

“People will think you’re hot? Because you are? Look, can we have some real talk right now?” She sat on the bed and patted beside her, “I know you aren’t over Jon, nobody could be, but I also know you don’t want to move on. And that’s fine too, we both want you to be happy, but I am less protective of you. Maybe you and Jon will work out, maybe you won’t, no one knows the future. But tonight? You need to have fun. So please, come out with me. And please wear that smokin’ hot outfit.”

She gave me a light hug, “Now let’s go say good bye to Phil and head out.” She grabbed my hand and nearly pulled me out of the room.

AJ made me wait outside the living room, giving me a drumroll as I entered the living room, as though I have never worn anything this fashionable. I would be insulted if I didn’t like her so much.

“Come on out!” She screamed and threw her arms up in the air, turning to look at Phil, “How do you think she looks?”

“She’s not going out in that?”

“What do you mean? Yes she is.”

“AJ, just no.” He crossed his arms and shook his head.

“She is going out like that, she looks hot.” She threw me a wink over my head.

“I don’t think-“ I had to cut them off.

“Um, hi guys? I am standing right here. Phil I am wearing this and I would greatly appreciate it if you two talked to me, not about me like I am some child you are arguing about?”

“Oh, honey, I didn’t mean it like that!” Her smile had fallen.

“No I know you didn’t, but you two are acting like two crazy parents before sending their daughter to prom. Phil, I am a big girl, I can handle a crop top and skirt. AJ, thank you for loaning me the outfit. I am very excited for tonight.”

I lied through my teeth, but AJ's beaming smile returned.

Truthfully? The only thing I was looking forward to was drinking.

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The night had been pretty uneventful, we met up with 5 of AJ’s other friends and went to dinner at this amazing little tapas place.

We spit plates of authentic tapas and had two different types of Sangrias in large pitchers on the table.

One of the girls, Karen, says we should play ‘Never Have I Ever’ because omgitwouldbethebesttimeever. I really wish I was kidding, but that’s exactly how she spoke.

I was coming out on top, my years of not having sex, or dating, or really doing anything at all, kept me with the most fingers up, with only one down.

“Never have I ever slept with a professional wrestler.”

Really, these girls were really fucking creative. AJ put a finger down, and looked at me, her friends didn’t know me, had no idea that I even worked for the WWE, and she didn’t want me to feel awkward, but in the spirit of the game, I put a finger down.

It didn’t slip Karen’s eagle eyesight.

“WHOA whoa whoa, girl. Who have you slept with?”

AJ put her hand on Karen’s arm, “Hey girls, what do you think of going-“
“Who? Who?” Completely unfazed by AJ’s attempt at redirection.

“I dated a wrestler for a few months.”

“AJ! You set her up with a WWE dude and you wouldn’t even introduce me to the guy from The Shield, the really hot, crazy one?! You stupid bitch.” She play slapped AJ’s arm, she was clearly tipsy so I couldn’t be angry with her, really. She had just met me.

I sat there frozen, taking the longest sip of sangria possible.

“Actually, that hot, crazy Shield guy, Dean Ambrose?”

She shook her head up and down, like a puppy begging for a treat.

“He is actually my ex-boyfriend.” I can’t remember a time where I felt that good, I have never really been the source of envy, but watching her jaw go slack and her eyes go huge, it was a straight up high.

“You lucky bitch!” She reached over the table, positioning her hand for a high five.

So I gave her one. Perhaps I could get along with this girl.

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We ended up at some hole in the wall karaoke bar.

Five pitches of sangria later, though. I teetered around the bar on the highest heels I have worn in forever, I felt on top of the world and was having the best time. We had cheered to asshole exes and no one brought Jon up anymore, I felt at ease with these girls and was so happy I came out.

We sang karaoke for what seemed hours, I had sang a lot in high school but I couldn’t bear to do it alone. There wasn’t a big crowd, it was a Wednesday after all, but a few had noticed AJ. After she had taken a few pictures, they left us alone for the most part but they still watched our every move.

“So it wasn’t a good breakup I take it?” Karen asked as she plopped into the booth next to me, she has just finished an impressive rendition of Katy Perry’s newest song.

“It wasn’t, it’s still pretty fresh.”

“You should go sing it out, its therapeutic.” She mimicked a relaxing yoga pose, “And it’s fucking fun!”

“I don’t know, I think I would feel uncomfortable.”

“COME ON!” she grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the booth, “AJ! You pretend to play drums, I will play air guitar, and Maeve will be the lead singer. She needs to sing her heartbreak out! SING IT!”

“Fine! Fine!” I threw my hands up in the air, officially surrendering to the will of this crazy chick and AJ.

“I know the PERFECT song.”

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It was 1am in Vegas when I heard my phone go off, I was sitting on my back porch drinking a beer and just staring off into space. Even though she had only been at my place a few times, it was still hard being here without her, I honestly even considered staying in a hotel to avoid my house.

I tried to steer my mind away from her but I couldn’t help it. I was obsessed with her, she was everything to me, and I drove her away. I took my beer and slammed it against the cinderblock wall around my patio. The bottle shattering and the rest of my beer soaking the wall.

I grabbed my phone to see an email from Colby.

AJ just sent me this video, well she sent it to Phil, who sent it to me, who told me, show this to Jon if you want. He may have a shot if you watch the end of the vid.

I opened it up to see a YouTube video, posted 45 minutes ago by some random account. It had 3 views, making me the fourth. I hit play and the sound of some Taylor Swift song blasted out of my phone, I shut it off and went inside to get my laptop, knowing that the lighting was dark and I had to see what this was.

I heard the beginning of what I thought was Love Story by Taylor Swift, which I only know because I had heard it a few times on Maeve’s playlist. The video was shitty, dark and blurry. I hear some talking, an introduction but it’s still hard to hear.

And then it comes into focus and I see her, standing at the middle of the stage. She looks gorgeous, and hot. I instantly get heated, I can hear guys cheering in the crowd, and I wish I could throw my coat over her through the computer, cover her up.

I find myself getting antsier as the first seconds go on, then the opening chords end and the singing begins. I nearly forgot how beautiful of a singing voice she has, I get lost in it, not even listening to the lyrics.

About two thirds of the way into the video, I catch something and have to listen to it a few more times. I finally catch it.

Jon you can save me, they're trying to tell me how to feel
This love is difficult, but it's real
Don't be afraid, we'll make it out of this mess
It's a love story baby just say yes

I listen to the song a dozen more times, she’s wasted, there is no doubt about it. But it was my name, she sang it in this song, and now that I have heard it so much I consider myself somewhat of any expert. Two star crossed people in love, who shouldn’t be together, who probably aren’t good for each other, but should make it work.

Who knew Taylor Swift was so fucking deep?

I just watched the video, well I watched it about 15 times

Shit dude, you did, it has like 18 views now! Ha.

Phil, what the fuck do I do?

I don’t know dude, but I know her, she fucking misses you. She wants to hate but can’t, so you figure it out.

See you on Friday.

I knew you were a smart kid.

I was going to Chicago, I was going to Phil’s wedding. And I had no idea what I was about to fucking do. But I knew what I wanted to do, I wanted to work on repairing this, it wouldn’t be quick but if that drunken karaoke was any indication, it was possible.