Status: Just a goodbye...
Just Don't
Goodbye
“Just don’t” I whisper. Your hand slowly falls from my face as I take a step back, rejection in your eyes.
“Don’t?” You ask, hurt saturating your gaze.
“Please, don’t touch me” I say softly, trying not to make you angry but not wanting to be touched.
“What happened? What do you mean don’t touch you?” The anger begins to build up.
“I… I just can’t do this anymore.” I say the tears starting to form in my bright blue eyes.
“But I need you.” You say, stepping closer and raising your hand back to my cheek, sadness in your eyes, anger deep behind them. A small sad smile forms on my lips.
“You don’t need me, you have her to keep you occupied. I was just ‘fun’ anyways wasn’t I?” I felt the bitterness begin to stir in my stomach. I knew it was a low blow but I couldn’t help but say it. Relapse seems like bliss to me… I felt the familiar ball of tension in my stomach.
“You know you meant more than that to me.” Your eyes staring right through me. My smile grew, but still saddened.
“You meant the world to me, but I know i’ll never be enough for you. Thank you for everything you have done for me, but it hurts too much.” I raise my hand to your cheek and look straight into your eyes.
“Meant? Past tense?” You look hurt. I almost want to wrap you in my arms and take the pain away but I know it’s time to say goodbye.
“Past tense” I replied. I lean in and kiss your cheek, tears spilling over. I lower my hand and walk away. No more words said. Just the walk away that seemed to be miles. Goodbyes are the hardest, but I will be ok. I have to be.
“Don’t?” You ask, hurt saturating your gaze.
“Please, don’t touch me” I say softly, trying not to make you angry but not wanting to be touched.
“What happened? What do you mean don’t touch you?” The anger begins to build up.
“I… I just can’t do this anymore.” I say the tears starting to form in my bright blue eyes.
“But I need you.” You say, stepping closer and raising your hand back to my cheek, sadness in your eyes, anger deep behind them. A small sad smile forms on my lips.
“You don’t need me, you have her to keep you occupied. I was just ‘fun’ anyways wasn’t I?” I felt the bitterness begin to stir in my stomach. I knew it was a low blow but I couldn’t help but say it. Relapse seems like bliss to me… I felt the familiar ball of tension in my stomach.
“You know you meant more than that to me.” Your eyes staring right through me. My smile grew, but still saddened.
“You meant the world to me, but I know i’ll never be enough for you. Thank you for everything you have done for me, but it hurts too much.” I raise my hand to your cheek and look straight into your eyes.
“Meant? Past tense?” You look hurt. I almost want to wrap you in my arms and take the pain away but I know it’s time to say goodbye.
“Past tense” I replied. I lean in and kiss your cheek, tears spilling over. I lower my hand and walk away. No more words said. Just the walk away that seemed to be miles. Goodbyes are the hardest, but I will be ok. I have to be.