Summer Has Come and Passed

That day last week, the time that it took me to walk from Billie's front door and to reach his bottom step, was how long our separation lasted. The time it took me to reach the bottom step was how long we could stand to be away from each other.

I was whisked away from the bottom step wrapped up in Billie's arms. My body was flung tight against his warm chest as he grabbed hold of me. Kissing me so forceful I could've been knocked over. We pushed our bodies back through the front door, our mouths never parting from one another.

My back was shoved against the door, shutting it closed. Now I was subjected to being trapped between Billie's half naked body and the door. Which caused me to become a willing victim of Billie's biting kisses to my neck.

I giggled as Billie lifted my body up--his hands securely gripping my ass--as I wrapped my legs around him. I then giggled even more as he struggled between kissing me and carrying me up the stairs. However, we did eventually make it to the top of the stair case, and to his bedroom.

His room smelled like it did always, like cigarettes and weed. The smell never bothered me. And it especially didn't bother me that particular day because I was too busy with disrobing Billie to care. After the two of us were completely bare, Billie once again pulled me up into his arms and then gently placed me on his bed.

Billie hovered over me, his slightly calloused fingers brushed against my face as he pushed away my loose strand of hair. He dipped his head down low to kiss me. I remember the next words he said so vividly because his eyes were so mesmerizing as he spoke them.

"I love you--so much, V. So much."

He kissed me again before I could respond.

That afternoon wasn't even our first time together, but Billie always made each time feel that way. Just like that day last week.

I was now driving down the road, my arm hanging from the window, stopping at a red-light I toyed around with the stations on the radio, I stopped toying with it when I heard a familiar voice play, the voice of Roger Daltrey sang "Behind Blue Eyes" throughout through my speakers. I grinned as my foot stepped on the acceleration pad once the light turned green. Flashbacks ringing out through my mind as the chorus played out.

I was never into The Who as much as I am now. It was all thanks to Billie, and I paid him back though by exposing him to Operation Ivy. I remembered the first time I heard the song.

Billie and I were in his basement, however it was used a lot for band practice. He was busy trying to spark his worn out lighter, trying to light up the joint he had rolled. I was busy with the radio. An unfamiliar song blared from the tiny radio.I switched the station but Billie soon wailed and told me to turn back to the previous station. I raised a hand in mock surrender as I changed it back.

Billie's eyes closed as he sang along, it may have been biased but I definitely favored Billie's singing. I simply sipped on the beer beside me as I watched and enjoyed Billie getting lost in the song. His eyes opened in mid-singing and locked his gaze with mine. Grinning, Billie set his guitar to the side and stood up from the crate he was sitting on, he held his hand out to me. I set my beer on the ground and stood up grabbing hold of it, the two of us beginning to slow dance in his small basement.

Wrapped up in those memories, I hadn't even noticed I was cruising down the familiar street and was only a few minutes away from my destination. Soon enough, I brought my truck to a stop and turned it off, exiting out. I walked up the sidewalk, my jangling keys the only bit of noise until I reached Billie's front door.

I could hear two voices-- one of them Billie Joe's, and the other a female voice. My female instincts kicking in, I began eavesdropping. Truly interested in the conversation going on behind the door. Their voices rose and fell, so making out what they said was more than difficult, it was nearly impossible.

However, their tones seemed rather hostile, Billie's more than anything else. I stayed posted at the front door. Still trying to understand their mumbles.

Their mumbles soon grew into silence and my guess was that they had finally stopped talking. I heard shuffles move closer to the door. I didn't wanna exactly be caught eavesdropping on his front porch, so I made myself scarce. By jumping down from the porch and jogging back to my truck to hide out in.

My hand was only on my passenger door. I had planned to slide into the driver’s seat from this way, when I heard the female voice again, much clearer.

"V," The voice called out, I turned around and took in all the familiar features of one of my best friends, Jade. "You just got here?"

Lying, I nodded. "I came to see BeeJ." That part wasn't a lie; I walked away from my truck and stood a few inches away from Jade.

"Well," She said looking from me to Billie's front door. "I don't think today's such a good day."

"Why?" I asked, my concern beginning to flare up.

Heaving a large sigh, Jade stuck a hand in her multi-colored pink and purple hair, running her fingers through it again, and again. Something was obviously wrong.

Gnawing on her bottom lip, she said two measly words. "John quit."

"What?" I asked dumbfounded. "How could he--what? I don't understand--I don't--" My words began mixing themselves together due to my increased confusion.

Jade only shrugged her shoulders, sadly. "Mike phoned me earlier," She said.

"He practically screamed through the phone: 'John quit. John fucking quit! He's ditchin' us for college.'" Jade tried impersonating Mike's voice, but her own soft tone made it difficult.

"He said some other curse words and then told me he was coming here to tell Billie. I thought it'd be a good idea for a level headed person to be in the room with them." She added on.

"John told Mike and not Billie?" I questioned angrily.

She shook her head disagreeing. "No, he didn't tell Mike himself either. One of their other friends told Mike. John just up and left," She snapped her fingers together. "Like that."

I shook my head, as if trying to shake away the things that were happening. How could John just leave them hanging? Tell them nothing? "What the hell are they supposed to do now?" I asked, not directly to Jade, but more-so myself. "They had gigs comin' up."

"I've got no idea." She said as she lifted and dropped her shoulders. I placed my hand on my forehead, and looked at Jade. Who looked just as helpless as to what to do in our current situation. When I was readying myself to ask Jade another question, the front door slammed open, startling us both.

I looked past Jade to see a heated Mike Dirnt storming towards us. I was ready to move out of the way and take Jade with me so that we wouldn't be plowed over by Mike. But he steered himself around us and stomped over to his car. Jade mumble a ‘see ya’ as she followed behind Mike and they disappeared into his car, speeding off.

I wasted no time heading to Billie's door, he answered on my fourth knock and walked away, I slid myself through his door and closed it behind me as I watched him plop himself into the chair. He sank deeper and deeper into its mold.

Probably trying to slip himself into any other world than this one. Because at this very moment, his world was crumbling. I dropped my bag on the floor and walked over to him, dropping to my knees in front of him resting my chin on the chair's arm looking up at him.

"Billie, there are plenty of other drummers, better than John." I said, not bothering to ask him the useless question of what was wrong since I already knew.

"Who are we gonna find this sudden? Everyone has who they need." He said leaning his head back on the cushion set behind his troubled head.

"There are plenty of drummers at Gilmans," I smacked him on his hand lightly. "Go there and sell yourselves, get people to audition or whatever. Schmooze." He shook his head at me.

"Who there is going to be in our band?" He asked closing his eyes. "Ya know how long it took us to create a damn fan-base there and earn some fucking respect?" He said with his eyes still closed but his face twisting into a rotten expression.

"You don't need him to have respect. You guys have busted your humps there, you both have got way too much talent not to keep on," I said bringing myself from my current position to sit myself on the table set in front of his chair. "Someone's gonna join."

"It's no fucking use, V," He said, finally opening his eyes, his cold emerald eyes. "It's done--it's over."

"W-What?" I stammered.

"No, no, no!" I shouted. "No-- you two-- you both have worked too damn hard to fucking give up now, no, don't be a fucking wimp letting this shit get you down!" I nearly screamed in his face, I stood myself up by now. I started pacing with my hands glued to my hips, my nails digging into the flesh on my hip.

"There's no need to bitch at me just because there's nothing I can do about it alright." He pulled himself from his mold in the chair. Both of us standing, and fuming.

"I'm not fucking bitching. But there is a bitch among us, and it my dear, is not me." I sneered, causing my nails to dig further into my hip. He narrowed his dark eyes at my insult to him.

"Well ya could’ve fooled me." He growled.

"It's not my damn fault you don't have the fucking balls to believe in you guys talent. What is Mike gonna do, huh?" I said walking towards his still body; I forcefully pulled his shoulder to make him see me when he turned away from me. "You better look at me!" I ordered while squeezing his shoulder forcefully since I still had my grip on it.

"What the hell do you want from me, huh?" He exclaimed, yanking his shoulder from my hand. "I can't just make someone appear, alright."

"Try!" I yelled. "Try not sitting on your ass, get up and fight. Find a goddamn drummer."

"Maybe I'm too fucking tired of fighting, ever think of that?" He spat looking at me from over his shoulder.

"Too tired to fight for your dream, something you want?" I asked. "Where's the real Billie?"

"Upstairs-- asleep. ‘Cuz that's where I'm going right now" He retorted, walking away from me to actually head to the stairs. I dug my nails into his arm pulling him back. I was even more infuriated since he tried walking from me and this whole situation. I wasn't going to let everything Mike and Billie worked their asses off.

I could not and would not let Billie Joe walk away before I could get that through his stubborn pothead.

"No, don't walk away from this, or me." I stated pulling him back further. I was caught off guard when Billie took it physical with me, ripping from my grip lifting my body from the floor by my arms.

"What am I suppose to do?!" He shouted in my face. “What do you want from me, huh!?”

That's when I looked past the anger and looked into his face-- at him. He was broken, heartbroken, everything and more that he and Mike built, was taking itself apart right in front of his own eyes. His music was his life, and it had been shot down.

I was bitching, but for his own benefit, but calling him a wimp and accusing him of giving up his dream, was as good as kicking him when he was down. I was kicking him while he was down.

He needed time to pick all the pieces up again. My nagging him and badgering wouldn't any help. He needs time to get back in the right mind of Green Day, and what was best. I felt like a complete ass for shouting at him.

It wasn't my place to try and say what was best, I'm just the supporting girlfriend on the sidelines, and that's what I needed to do: Support him.

I pulled myself from the grip he still held on me, planting my feet on the ground. His face fell from a hardened expression to soft and sorrowful.

He was just tired and disappointed. He wasn't a wimp or anything I had just rudely called him. He was but only a simple teenage boy whose dream was just destroyed in front of his own eyes. For a minor second though.

But it wasn't my job to show him that his dream was gone for only a second; he had to do it himself. I couldn't just force feed him, that's wasn't his style, nor was it mine.

I simply placed a warm and caring peck on his cheek while walking around him to collect my bag from the floor. I drew in a breath and left out the door, closing it behind me, leaving without a word.

Billie knew what he had to do.