I'm Not Insane (Heaven Help Me)

They sat down at the table with Gerard and Ray on either side of Sav. Frank, Mikey, and Bob sat across from them. They got their food after setting down their stuff and they proceeded to have a discussion about the weirdest things that they had ever done. Savanna pointed to herself with both hands and said, “You all know mine!” Gerard laughed and said, “Breaking all the windows in my house.” Bob bit his lip where his lip ring used to be and spoke. “Seeing random shit.” Frank shook his hair into his face. “Thinking random shit.” Mikey adjusted his glasses. “Trying random shit.” Savanna shook her head. “Well that was /really/ descriptive guys!” They laughed and continued eating. When they were done eating they traveled to the common room in a pack. Mikey was tickled by all of them when he pretended to fall asleep. Sav couldn’t blame him. She felt like falling asleep while Bob had a good rant on over-processed foods. Mikey squirmed and giggled as Gerard swooped at him, tickling him. Frankie held Mikey’s hands down and Ray held his legs on the ground. Bob placed one foot on Mikey’s chest and stood there in a triumphant stance while Mikey laughed until Savanna thought he was going to die. A nurse who insisted that she had to go see her doctor soon dragged her away from her friends. So she went and had a good talk. Gee, Mikey and Ray decided to wait for her in the hall while Bob and Frankie stayed behind. When they saw her they were terribly worried. She came out of the room at a run and when she saw them she looked at them once with wet, dead eyes set in a tear-stained face before she ran in the opposite direction. Obviously they had to know what happened to make their friend act like this but Ray knew that he would just make things worse. So he ran back to the common room while the brothers ventured off in search of Savanna. It didn’t take long to find her. The door to the room was wide open and Mikey hastily entered with Gerard right behind him. The worry in Gee’s eyes bled right through his mess of long black hair in front of his eyes. Savanna was in a corner with her own black hair spread across her knees where her head was resting. Mikey went over to her and knelt down beside her slowly. “Hey…” he said softly, tucking her hair behind her ear. She just shook it back into her face again but she sniffled in recognition. Gerard bent down in front of her. “Do you want to tell us what happened? ‘Cause if you don’t we won’t press you.” His breathy voice almost whispered. Sav lifted her head from her knees but her hair stayed in her face. She leaned back her head so that it was resting on the wall. She whispered softly and her voice was angry and full of energy. “I don’t want anyone to lie to me anymore… it makes me angry…” she paused for a gasping breath before whispering once more. “I know I’m not insane…I can’t be!” She didn’t cry but her face was twisted with sorrow along with the anger. Gerard’s eyes were only half hidden by his hair now and they went blank as Savanna spoke. He chewed on his lip and glanced about the room. “Then why are you here?”. Sav snorted. “The universe has hated me for a long fucking time.” Mikey just stared at the floor. “What lie did they tell you?” Sav now looked like she was about to cry. “They told me that… that you guys were effecting my illness negatively…and that I had to stay away.” Savanna squeezed her knees closer to her chest while the boys stared in disbelief and shock. “They said maybe my subconscious was trying to tell me something when I attacked…Mikey…” He gasped and his brows knit together. “But you mistook me for a ghost! I’m pale as hell! I could be!” His attempt at humor failed dramatically. Savanna turned paler than Gee and Mikey combined. “I don’t think I can live without you guys…you guys are the only people who ever…liked me.” Gee sighed but his face hardened into a determined look. “We aren’t going to let them do that without a fight.” Mikey nodded with the same look. Savanna thought it might be a Way family trait. “You are like the little sister that Gee always wanted before he got stuck with me…plus you keep Frank in line! None of us except sometimes Bob can do that. You can’t live without us? Fuck we couldn’t do anything without you!” Sav looked at him but only despair shown through her thick black hair. “How are they going to figure that out? They won’t listen to me! I’m insane… remember?” She let her head fall to her knees. Gerard and Mikey just stood beside her and kept silent. “Just go…please…go…” Gee was about to voice his protest when Mikey grabbed his wrist. He shook his head and stood. He walked to the door and Gee got up reluctantly. Just before Mikey exited the room he saw Gerard whisper something in Savanna’s ear and Savanna just melted back into the corner. Gee exited behind Mikey and they walked towards the common room silently. They hated being the bearers of bad news…but they knew that the others had to know. Bob, Ray and Frank would be broken. They were too…what had they done wrong? Mikey wondered if they would ever talk or if the doctor would move her into a different room. Gerard felt as if something had been stolen from him…them… They entered the common room together with grim faces. “What!?” Frank sprang at Mikey and grabbed him by the shoulders. “Negative effect are you fucking kidding me? Please tell me you are joking!” The faces on Gee and Mikey answered his question and he sank down beside Ray and Bob with a shocked face. Bob and Ray just sat there in a trance. “What…the…fuck!” Bob said slowly. Ray’s hair deflated a bit as he ran his hands through it. His face was a plain writing of “hit by a train” Mikey tried to comfort them. “Well we got on fine before her… why shouldn’t we now?” Ray sprang at his with flashing eyes. “Are you blind!?” Mikey struggled against Ray’s hands that were caught in his shirt. Gee sprang at Ray, tearing him off his brother in a panic. Ray just stumbled backward and sat down hard. He hid his face in his hands and Gee hugged Mikey protectively. “Have you got any idea what this 'random girl' has done for us?” Ray’s voice was a hiss, almost a whisper. “Tell me…Mikey…have you had any more fits while she’s been here? Gerard? Don’t you fucking know?” The small groups of patients were staring now Ray didn’t seem to care. No one else seemed to even notice.