With My Life in Her Hands

"I just feel so guilty," Willow confesses over the small table.

I can feel my lips thin in an attempt to not frown and let Willow keep speaking.

I don't like it when Willow feels bad.

"Giles looked so hurt last night. I mean it's not like us Scoobies were trying to leave him out. We honestly forgot he didn't know about the Initiative or Buffy's commando boyfriend. Now that we're together it seems like one more secret too. I don't like this feeling but I like being with you by myself'"

Willow's eyebrows furrow and three wrinkles appear on flawless cream and rose skin. Small lips are stuck in a pout over a secret she feels she can't or won't tell.

That secret would be me.

"Giles is your father? So when you tell them, I need to get his approval too? This is a lot of people. There's your blonde friend who slightly scares me known as Buffy. You have a male you liked in the 'Scoobies' that apparently turned into a hyena. Now you have a Giles. I am very confused," I admit.

"Giles is my kinds sorta dad but not. I mean he didn't make me but Giles is here and I love him like a dad and he loves me like a daughter so kinds sort yes with a hint of no."

I grin with a closed mouth at Willow's babble.

"As for the Scoobies, there's more. The ex-vengeance demon Anya whose dating Xander which I can't explain for the life of me. You already know about Xander: the old crush and ex-hyena?"

I nod confirming.

"I just don't like lying. I'm not good with the lies. I'm more of a avoided-girl so I don't have to."

"It's not lying," I reassure gently taking her hand in comfort. "It's omission."

"Isn't omission lying?" Willow questions and when she looks at with me like that, I can't seem to think at all.

"I don't think it is," I say disagreeing. "Omission can save lives just like ignorance is bliss. You shouldn't debate this too deeply though or you'll get a headache and I don't like it when you hurt," I advise.

Willow nods but stills seems stuck about not telling Giles.

"Maybe you can tell him soon," I propose a new plan. "You can wait a couple of days or more until you think we're ready. I just don't want them to find out in a bad situation."

A nod makes Willow's hair follow the up and down motion slightly from the short haircut.

"We should talk about something else," Willow smiles at me a little embarrassed. "This isn't really first date talk, is it?"

I shrug my shoulders still with a small smile on my face.

"How are your classes?"

"They're a little challenging," I admit. "I love it though. Psychology helps me better understand sociology, the study of how society works? I think I might major in it."

"How are your classes?" I say repeating the question.

"I wouldn't know," Willow says with a smile. "I've been studying with someone lately but can't get any work done," she teases.

I smile at the teasing.

"That's the best kind of studying."

"It's of the good," Willow chirps from across the table.

"This is a get to know you situation right?"

"Yeah, first dates usually are."

"I can do that. I don't like men," I confess.

Willow chuckles.

"Isn't that kind of obvious?"

I shake my head.

"You misunderstand. Eura said all men are evil and can never stay faithful. She says they only work to get what they want no matter how many broken hearts the men leave in their wake."

Willow frowns.

"That's so cynical. Trust me, there are good one. Xander...no...he's obsessed with it. Angel...no...he went evil. Giles," Willow almost announces. "He's not like that at all."

"The men at the party were like that," I say defending my teachings somewhat politely. "Even some of the men at UC Sunnydale. They talk about me but aren't confident enough to come near."

Willow's brows furrow again.

"You shouldn't frown so much. You'll get wrinkles," I say gently.

"I don't like the thought of other people wanting you. I never thought of myself as jealous-girl but I think I am. I don't like it when people want who I want especially if they want me back. I'm sure you want me, right?"

"Of course I do. If I didn't why would I be here? You don't need to worry about that with me."

Willow smiles at the confirmation and starts getting up.

"Where are you going?"

Willow takes my hand and helps pull me up.

She puts some money on the table and half drags me out of the small restaurant.

Where are we going now?

__________________________________________________________________________________
"They do this all the time?" I say staring intensely at the screen.

"Oh!" I exclaim."You're the Scoobies because like Mystery Inc. you catch monsters!"

Willow hmms and I can feel her stare but am focusing on the movie .

"Now whose the smart one?" she quizzes me eager.

"Velma. I like smart girls," I say looing up to speak to Willow but refocusing on the television playing the theme song.

I hear Willow sputter and imagine her cheeks turning the pink of roses.

"Let's see if you were really watching the movie."

"I was," I defend myself weakly. "You're pretty though and I like kissing you so it's your fault I was kissing you," I point out smiling. "Besides, you kissed me back."

"Anyway-" Willow starts knowing I'm right.

I start laughing at her omission.

"Now whose the girl in purple?" Willow finishes smiling but semi-serious.

"Daphne. She's damsel in distress."

"Who does Shaggy have for a pet?"

"Scooby."

"Now what doe he say?" the Wiccan inches even closer and I can feel the denim against my skin again.

I glance up at Willow smiling and taking a deep breath.

"Scooby dooby doo," I howl in imitation of the famous talking dog.

Willow bursts out laughing.

I wish that everyday was like this.