Ache With Me

I poked my head through the office door and said, “Zina? Got a minute?”

“Yeah, what’s up?” She looked away from her computer screen, her eyes immediately zeroing in on the gap between my top and skirt. The slightest rounding of my belly was visible.

I sat in the chair across from her, taking a minute to fuss with the way my skirt was lying to give myself time to run through my little spiel. “I need to talk about maternity leave.”

“Are you serious?” Her whole face lit up. “Lily, that’s great!”

“I’m surrogating for my sister and her husband. I’m carrying it for her.” I knew as soon as people started figuring out I was pregnant they were going to assume it was Max’s, so telling Zina immediately that it wasn’t mine was probably a good idea.

“Oh. Well that’s still incredible. How far along are you?”

“10 weeks. The doctor says I’m showing already because I’m so little.” I snorted. “By the time I hit six months I’ll look like I swallowed a basketball.”

“You’re already glowing, you know that?” She clapped her hands. “Oh, I’m so excited! We’re going to have to have a last day of work party for you, I’ll tell Brian when he comes in.”

“I’m due on February 16th and I was thinking of taking off the month before it, just because the doctor says I’ll probably have trouble carrying the weight when I get further along.”

“We’ll figure it out when it gets closer to the date. In the meantime, do you want to make an office announcement so the story is straight? I mean, when you first told me I assumed it was Max’s and yours.”

“Yeah, I figured I’d be having trouble with that.” I shrugged. “I’ll probably go out to tell them now, if that’s all right.”

“All you really need to say is that you’re being a surrogate and you’re due in February.”

“Sounds like a plan.” So I went outside, Zina close on my heels, and got the entire office’s attention. The silence was a little disconcerting, but with Zina’s hand on my shoulder I managed to open my mouth and tell them exactly what I’d told Zina. I thought the roof would come down when they all started clapping and cheering. They were acting like I’d just won a Pulitzer or an Olympic gold medal. All day people were coming up to me to congratulate me. I had lunch in the office because Max was out of town for the day, meeting with an art dealer that wanted to buy some of his pieces in Spokane.

He’d moved into my loft last month and it was kind of a tight fit with all of his art supplies, but we were making it work. Cheshire and Sylvester were getting along surprisingly well considering the way she’d always avoided me when I came back from Max’s apartment. It had been nice living with him, I had to admit. He drove me to work every morning and had dinner ready when I came back. He was spoiling me rotten.

I’d gotten up to throw my stuff away when I nearly pitched over.

“Are you all right?” Joan asked, noticing the way I was swaying back and forth.

“I’m fine, I’m just dizzy. I think I need to sit down.” She got up to guide me back to my desk.

“You feel kind of warm. Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah, I think I’m…I’m…” I swayed one more time and then my vision went gray.

When I opened my eyes again, my head was in Joan’s lap and Zack was holding my legs.

“What happened?” I asked, blinking a few times to clear my eyes.

“I think you fainted.” Zack said.

“God, I hope that’s not gonna happen now.” I groaned, sitting up slowly with Joan’s help. I’d been lucky enough to avoid morning sickness so far, but I didn’t want to be passing out all the time.

“You should go home and get some rest.” Joan suggested.

“I’m not that pregnant yet.” I had a feeling if Avery knew I’d passed out she would move into the loft and make me work from home. “No one called my sister, right?”

“No. You should call Max and have him take you home though.” Brian’s head appeared from around my desk. “Zina’s gonna send you home whether you like it or not, you know that.”

“Yeah, I know.” I scrabbled in my purse for my phone. Max was four hours away in Spokane and wouldn’t be home until tomorrow, and Eden was at work right now. After a moment’s hesitation, I dialed Hunter’s number. Hopefully he’d pick up.

The phone rang twelve times before I hung up and tried again. I had a feeling he was up in his attic working and he usually had his phone with him in case of emergencies. Finally, on the tenth ring, he picked up.

“Hey little sister, what’s up?” He had decided I was the little sister he’d never had so he called me that. I didn’t mind at all. I’d always wanted a brother.

“Hey Hunter, I had a bit of a mishap at work and I need to get home and Max is out of town.”

“What kind of mishap?” He knew I was pregnant, which was probably why he sounded so worried now.

“I fainted. I’m okay, but my boss is sending me home.”

“I’ll be there as soon as I can, no worries.” I gave him the address of the building and hung up. I left a message on Max’s phone to let him know what happened and that I was all right. Then I settled back into my chair to wait for Hunter.

He came into the building to get me, and I was surprised at how he looked. His hair was much shorter and looked neater than I’d ever seen it. He was still wearing his usual faded jeans and scuffed boots, but he was actually wearing a button down shirt. Granted its sleeves were rolled up, but it was a big change.

“I’ll explain in the car. Let’s just get you home.” He kept his arm around my waist as we headed out of the building, probably so he could catch me if I fainted again. As I told him on the way, I felt fine and everyone was overreacting.

“So tell me about this outfit change.” I said when we got into the car.

“I was having lunch with someone and I wanted to look a little nicer than usual.” I had a feeling he was purposely being vague.

“Does this someone have a name?”

“Yes.” His cheeks were turning pink faintly.

“And does it start with an E?” I gave him a teasing grin.

“Shut up.” But now he was smiling and he wasn’t denying it. Eden had been surprisingly close lipped about her and Hunter, but I knew they’d been talking since that show we went to.

“I knew you two would hit it off. That makes this whole pointless trip worth it.”

“Lily, you and I both know as soon as Max looks at his messages he’s going to grow wings and fly home.” His face turned grave. “I don’t think you understand how worried we are about you.”

“Why are you worried? I’m perfectly healthy, the doctor says the baby is developing normally. What is there to be worried about?”

“Max loves you, of course he’s going to be worried about you. You’re so little, the baby weight is going to be hard for you to carry. And I’m worried because I care about you and I care about Max. He’s about to rip his hair out from the stress.”

“My sister isn’t making it any easier on him.” Max had quit smoking cold turkey and was chewing bubble gum like his life depended on it, so he was already stressed and off balance, but now that my sister was micromanaging everything he was ready to throw her out the window. She had showed up one day with three bag loads of groceries, all super foods and healthy shit she wanted me to eat. Then she started trying to get Max to not paint in the loft because the fumes would be bad for me and he basically told her to go kick rocks.

“So let him coddle you and let me take care of both of you, okay?” It occurred to me then that I hadn’t had to grab the handle on the roof once.

“Are you actually obeying traffic laws today?” It was no secret among us that Hunter drove like he was a Formula One driver.

“Hey, I have a pregnant lady on board. Can’t be putting you through the windshield.” He grinned over at me.

“Man, I should be pregnant more often. The menfolk are all spoiling me.”

“You’re literally furthering the human race Lily, that’s incredible.”

“Yeah, miracle of life and all that.” When we pulled up in front of my building, I started to get out when he put his hand on my arm.

“Do you want me to stay the night?”

“Why would I need you to?”

“I just don’t feel right having you stay here alone tonight, especially since you’ve already passed out once.” I mulled that over for a second. My first instinct was to send him away, but there was one thing that made me change my mind.

“Max would want you to stay.”

“Yeah, probably.”

“Okay then. Come on up.” He parked his car and we headed upstairs. “I feel bad for taking you away from your work.”

“All I need is a sheet of paper and a pen, really. You just lie down and watch TV, relax.” He made me a cup of herbal tea and sat me on the couch. There was a storm coming in off the bay, signaling the beginning of autumn in Seattle. For a while I just stared out the window, sipping my tea and watching the clouds roll in.

Not for the first time, I wondered what I’d gotten myself into. My body was no longer mine alone. There was a tiny life that belonged to my sister and her husband forming inside me. Maybe I was just being stubborn in not wanting to rest and take it easy. I had a responsibility to take care of this baby for nine months until my sister could take over.

I drained my mug and traded it for one of the pregnancy magazines Avery had brought me. It wouldn’t hurt to read one. It was time to get serious about this whole thing.