Lyle's Becky

I had braced myself from the moment I entered the classroom. I knew he’d be there but I couldn’t miss any more classes. Tyler was there too but I didn’t want to take advantage of his feelings. He loved me; he told me his real feelings as soon as he learned that I had broken up with Lyle. I just wished Tyler had the same importance to my heart as Lyle did, then maybe I wouldn’t be so hurt.

I sat with Crystal today and she didn’t seem to mind because her lab partner was absent. My heart raced as I could feel Lyle’s stare on the back of my head. I tried to act normal but the slight bruise under his right eye made me worry, even though it shouldn’t. Tyler would have punched him again if he didn’t stop speaking like that to me yesterday. Telling me we were over was one thing but calling me names was too much…and not just for me, but Tyler as well.

The class soon ended but I didn’t manage to pay to attention to the teacher because all I was thinking about was what had happened and the two boys in my life. Tyler loves me, but I loved Lyle. Lyle used to be mine…in love with me, and now I am his…in love with him, but he doesn’t want me anymore. The truth was harsh, too harsh.

When I got up from my seat, I was right across from Lyle. I kept glancing up at him while he was ignoring me, and to the point I just couldn't take it anymore, I spoke, ‘’Lyle, look-‘’

‘’Becky, stop,’’ He said a bit too loud. ‘’I really don't want to have this conversation with you. We broke up, remember?’’ I stared into his endless pool of blue eyes, reflecting my dark brown ones. He was really looking at me, just like during the class. I knew he wanted me, so why was he doing this? Why was he hurting me? Was I not good enough?

‘’Yes, but I still want to be friends.’’ I pleaded. ‘’You know that.’’ He looked up at me, his eyes burning into mine with an intensity that I couldn't handle. With a slight shake of his head he went back to walking away from me but I grabbed his arm pulling him back.

‘’I just can't be friends with you, not anymore and not ever again.’’ My nails were into his skin from the hurt and anger I was feeling.

I didn’t realize Tyler was looking at us or that he was still in the classroom till he called out to me, ‘’Ready to go, Becky?’’ I turned to face Tyler, he ruffled his black hair to the back, and a bored and slightly angered expression hugged his face.

‘’Can you leave before me, Ty? I want to talk with Lyle.’’ Tyler was about to say something but he thought against it and closed his mouth. He gave me a sad smile, his blue eyes hidden behind the grey curtain of sadness, nodded his head and left. I was glad we could still act like friends even after I rejected him. He was my best friend and that wasn’t going to change.

‘’Why are you doing this to me? Why are you doing this to us?’’ I asked. I had to know. He never said why we had to break up, he never said why he called me a whore, and he never said anything. We were just through and that was all; end of story.

‘’I was yours and I loved you but you acted like you owned me and that was beginning to be too much. Whenever you feel like being owned, you can come to me and I will take you in. Keep in mind that I’m not a fucking object.

‘’Okay,’’ I mumbled more to myself than to him. ‘’But, couldn’t you say that to me before we broke up? Did you have to treat me that way?’’

‘’It’s because you didn’t understand. No matter how many times I tried, you never listened. I had to always make my schedule work with yours. I had to match my mood with yours, my likings, my taste in things…everything. It was already too much for me. I didn’t want to pretend, I wanted a fucking relationship. But what you wanted was nothing more than an object to play with and someone who was like you. Well, here’s the news; we are not the same and we will never be. I’m not an object or someone you own.’’ He was yelling really loud. I was amazed none of the teachers had rushed to the classroom but they must have already left the third floor.

‘’I just wanted you to be mine and mine alone. I wouldn’t have given my virginity to a guy I didn’t love, nor would I be trying my best to see you whenever I got the chance. I didn’t order you to see me, I asked you because that was the only time I was available. I never said that you had to like something or hate it, not all people like the same things. Even five year old kids know that. You just never really understood me, did you?’’ I was yelling loud enough to match his voice when he yelled before me. Tears were spilling from my eyes and it was the first time I had ever cried in front of another person. I was the type of girl that cried behind closed doors or inside the bathroom while no one could listen.

‘’I couldn’t understand you because you never said anything Becky. I’m not a fucking magician. I can’t know what’s going on in your mind, but if you had told me, then I’d understand.’’ His hands went around my back, bringing me closer to him. He kissed my forehead, whispering, ‘’I love you so fucking much.’’

‘’I love you too,’’ I said with my head against his chest.

‘’So, you feel like being owned by me?’’ He asked, smirking slightly.

‘’Sure, if that’s what you want.’’ I answered, looking up and connecting our lips in a soft kiss. When we pulled apart, we smiled. The smile came on my face just naturally; on its own and Lyle smiled as well. He played with a brown strand of my hair and I copied him; playing with his black hair myself. We were looking into each others eyes, getting lost in a world of our own while we kissed yet again. It wasn’t bad being his… I was Lyle’s Becky and that was just our first fight.

Truth is that I wasn’t expecting we would make up so soon. We had broken up just yesterday and now we were together again. Communication is very important in relationships and it seemed we lacked on that department, but now we had the time to fix it and the ownership wasn’t going to be a problem. It didn’t matter if I was owned by him or vice versa as long as we were together.